MONEY Master the Game: 7 Simple Steps to Financial Freedom (89 page)

So how do we tackle these huge challenges? Each of us together, a little bit at a time. This year, you and I and a few of our friends are going to feed 100 million people. But wouldn’t it be incredible to feed 100 million people
each
year in a sustainable way? I provide fresh water for 100,000 people a day in India—it’s one of my passions. Wouldn’t it be amazing for us together to provide 3 million people with clean water a day and grow it from there? Or how about together freeing 5,000 children who had been enslaved, and supporting their education and a path to a healthy life?

That’s what the power of just 100,000 of us can do. Just as I built my foundation, this mission could grow geometrically. If over a decade or more we could find a way to grow to a million members, that would be a billion meals provided each year, 30 million people with clean water, or 50,000 children freed from slavery. These figures would be extraordinary, but in truth, even one child’s life saved would be worth all the effort.

So what’s
your
vision? Most people overestimate what they can do in a year and often underestimate what they can do in a decade or two.

I can tell you that when I started on my own mission and fed two families, I was excited. My goal was to feed 100 families in need. Then it grew to 1,000. Then 100,000. Then 1 million. The more we grow, the more we see what’s possible. It’s up to us. Will you join me? Put your change to work, and let’s change the world.

I have found that among its other benefits, giving liberates the soul of the giver.

—MAYA ANGELOU

Whether you sign up with SwipeOut or another organization, make a decision to take a small portion of the money you earn, or of your time, and consciously choose to invest it in something that doesn’t benefit you directly, but rather goes to someone in need. This decision is not about being right or wrong, it’s not about looking good, it’s about real wealth—truly feeling more alive and genuinely fulfilled.

In
Happy Money,
Dunn and Norton wrote that when giving outside of ourselves is done right,
“when it feels like a choice, when it connects us with others, and when it makes a clear impact—even small gifts can increase happiness, potentially stirring a domino effect of generosity.”

Moved by this potency of “prosocial spending” (that is, gifts for others and donations to charity) Dan Ariely and his wife were inspired to put into practice a simple system that they and their two sons could adhere to together as a family.
When the kids get their allowances, they have to divide the money among three jars.

Jar 1
is for
themselves.

Jar 2
is for
somebody they know.

Jar 3
is for
somebody they don’t know.

Notice that two-thirds of those jars are for prosocial spending, because that’s what will make the kids happy. All three jars are great, but the Arielys were careful to set aside an equal portion for people they don’t know. Spending on friends and family is beautiful, because it’s giving to people you love, but philanthropy is the third jar, and that can be the most satisfying and important form of giving.

I can also tell you there are extraordinary positive consequences for those
who give when it isn’t easy. It primes our brain; it trains and conditions us to know that there’s more than enough. And when our brain believes it, we experience it.

Sir John Templeton, not only the world’s greatest investor but also one of the greatest human beings, shared something with me almost 30 years ago: he said that he’s never known anyone who tithed—meaning the person gave 8% or 10% of what he earned to religious or charitable organizations over a ten-year period—who didn’t massively grow his financial wealth. But here’s the problem: everybody says, “I’ll give when I’m doing better.” And I used to think that way too. But I’ll testify to this: you deserve to start wherever you are today. You’ve got to start the habit of giving even if you think you’re not ready; even if you think you don’t have anything to spare. Why? Because, as I said to you in the very first chapter of this book, if you don’t give a dime out of a dollar, you’re not going to give $1 million out of $10 million, or $10 million out of $100 million.

How will you
fuel
your legacy of giving?
Will you give your time and energy? Will you tithe a portion of your earnings? Or will you start by taking a minute to go online and sign up with SwipeOut and
have your change become invested in changing lives?
If you’re inspired,
please do this now while you are connected to the impact you can have.
And remember: the person you will be giving the most to might very well be yourself. A life as a philanthropist begins with a single small step. Let’s take it together.

I don’t think of all the misery, but of the beauty that still remains.

—ANNE FRANK

By the way, I wasn’t always as conscious of the meaning of gratitude and giving. I used to live in scarcity. Looking back, my life hasn’t always been easy, but it’s always been blessed. I just didn’t recognize it at the time. Because I grew up financially poor, I was always working to make sure I could achieve at the highest level. But I didn’t realize that achievement comes in spurts.

It takes a long time not only to learn something but also to truly master it—to where it becomes so ingrained that it becomes a part of your life. So when I was just starting out, I suffered a series of setbacks. How did I react? Let’s just say not with the grace of an enlightened soul! I was constantly angry, frustrated—pissed off! Because nothing was going my way. And I was running out of money!

Then one night around midnight, I was driving on the 57 Freeway near the Temple Avenue off-ramp near Pomona, California, wondering, “What’s wrong? I’m working so hard. What’s missing? Why am I failing so miserably in getting what I want? Why isn’t this working?” Suddenly tears started to well in my eyes, and I pulled over to the side of the road. I dug out the journal I always carried with me—I still have it to this day—and started scribbling furiously by the dashboard light. I wrote in giant letters on a full page this message to myself:
“THE SECRET TO LIVING IS GIVING.”

Yes! I realized I’d forgotten that’s what life was about. I’d forgotten that this is where all the joy is found—that life isn’t just about me. It’s about
we.

When I pulled back on the freeway, I was inspired and refocused and reignited with a renewed sense of mission. I started doing well for a while. But, unfortunately, what I had written that night was just a concept, really—an insight that I hadn’t yet fully embodied. Then I started running into more challenges, and six months later, I had lost everything financially. Before long, I found myself at what I thought was the lowest point of my life, living on the floor of a 400-square-foot bachelor apartment in Venice, California, seething with resentment. I had fallen into the trap of blaming everyone else for the natural challenges that show up whenever you go after reasonably large goals. I decided that I had been manipulated by a variety of people who had taken advantage of me. “If it wasn’t for them,” my ego said, “I’d be in great shape!” So I threw myself a pity party. And the angrier and more frustrated I became, the less productive I became.

Then I started to eat as my way of escaping—all this crappy and ridiculous fast food. I gained over 38 pounds in just a few months; that’s not easy to do. You have to eat tons of food and not move much to pull that off! I found myself doing things I used to make fun of in other people—like watching daytime television. If I wasn’t eating, I was watching soap operas. I got pulled into the show
General Hospital
—if you’re old enough to remember when Luke and Laura got married, I was there!

It’s humorous (and a bit humiliating!) to look back and see how far down I had dropped. I was down to my last $19 and some change, and I didn’t have any prospects. And I was particularly pissed off at a friend who had borrowed $1,200 from me when I was doing well, but never paid it back. Now I was broke, but when I asked for the money, he’d turned his back on me. He wasn’t answering my calls! I was furious, thinking, “What the hell am I going to do! How am I even going to eat?”

But I was always pragmatic. I thought, “Okay, when I was seventeen and homeless, how did I get by?” I’d go to a smorgasbord and load up on the all-you-can-eat buffet for as little money as possible. That gave me an idea.

My apartment wasn’t that far from a beautiful place called Marina del Rey, where LA’s wealthy dock their yachts. There was a restaurant called El Torito that had a fabulous buffet for about $6. I didn’t want to waste any money on gas or parking, so I walked the three miles to the restaurant, which sat right on the marina. I took a seat by the window and loaded up plate after plate of food, eating like there was no tomorrow—which might have been the case!

While I ate, I was watching the boats going by and dreaming about what life could be like. My state started to change, and I could feel layers of anger melting off me. As I finished my meal, I noticed a small boy dressed up in a little suit—he couldn’t have been more than seven or eight years old—opening the door for his young mother. Then he proudly led her to their table and held out her chair. He had a special
presence.
This kid seemed so pure and so good. He was such a giver—you could tell by the respectful, loving way he treated his mom. I was deeply moved.

After I paid my check, I walked over to their table and said to the boy, “Excuse me, I just want to acknowledge you for being such an extraordinary gentleman. It’s amazing how you’re treating your lady like this.”

“She’s my mom,” he confided.

“Oh my God!” I said. “That’s even cooler! And it’s great that you’re taking her to lunch!”

He paused and in a quiet voice said, “Well, I really can’t, because I’m only eight years old—and I don’t have a job yet.”

“Yes, you are taking her to lunch,” I said. And in that moment, I reached into my pocket, took all the money I had left—maybe a grand total of $13 and some change—and put it down on the table.

He looked up at me and said, “I can’t take that.”

“Of course you can,” I told him.

“Why?”

I looked at him with a big smile and said, “Because I’m bigger than you are.”

He stared up at me, shocked, and then he started to giggle. I just turned and walked out the door.

I didn’t just walk out of that door, I
flew
home! I should have been freaking out, because I didn’t have a dime to my name, but instead I felt totally free!

That was the day my life changed forever.

That was the moment I became a wealthy man.

Something inside of me finally got past the feeling of scarcity. I was finally free of this thing called money that I had let terrorize me. I was able to give everything without any fear. Something beyond my mind, something deep in my spirit knew that I—as we all are—was guided. And this moment was meant to be. Just as you’re meant to be reading these words right now.

I realized I had been so busy trying to
get
that I had forgotten to
give.
But now I had recovered myself; I had recovered my soul.

I gave away my excuses, the blaming others, and suddenly I wasn’t angry anymore. I wasn’t frustrated. You might also have said I wasn’t very smart! Because I had no idea in hell where I was going to get my next meal. But that thought wasn’t even in my head. Instead, I felt an overwhelming sense of joy that I was released from a nightmare—the nightmare of thinking my life was doomed because of what other people had “done” to me.

That night, I committed to a plan of massive action. I decided exactly what I was going to do and how to get myself employed. I felt certain I’d make it happen—but I still didn’t know when my next paycheck would arrive or, even more urgently, my next meal.

And then a miracle happened. The next morning, the old traditional snail mail arrived, and I found a special letter in my mailbox. In it was a handwritten note from my friend saying he was so sorry he’d been avoiding my calls. I had been there for him when he needed me, and he knew that I was in trouble. So he was paying me back everything he owed. Plus a little more.

I looked inside the envelope, and there was a check for $1,300. It was enough to last me a month or more! I cried, I was so relieved.
And then I thought, “What does this mean?”

I don’t know if it was coincidence, but I chose to believe that those two events were connected, and that I had been rewarded because not only had I given but I had also wanted to give. Not out of obligation or fear—it was just an offering from my heart and soul to another young soul on the path.

And I can tell you honestly, I’ve had many tough days in my life, economically and emotionally—as we all have—but I’ve never gone back to that feeling of scarcity, and I never will.

The ultimate message of this book is very simple. It’s the sentence I wrote down in my journal on the side of the freeway. The final secret of wealth is:
the secret to living is giving.

Give freely, openly, easily, and enjoyably. Give even when you think you have nothing to give, and you’ll discover there is an ocean of abundance inside of you and around you. Life is always happening for you, not to you. Appreciate that gift, and you are wealthy, now and forever.

Understanding this truth brought me back to what I’m made for, what we’re all made for: to be a force for good. I was brought back to a life of deep meaning, constantly looking to fulfill my prayer—and that is
each day to be a blessing in the lives of all those people I meet and have the privilege to connect with.

Even though I may not have met you personally, I wrote this book from that same state, asking and praying that each chapter, each page, each concept, would be a deeper step in helping you to experience more of the blessings of who you are, and more of the blessings in what you are able to create and give in this life.