Mixed Feelings (Empathy in the PPNW Book 1) (3 page)

Another snap of frustration
whipped out of Laurel to cut into my cheek, but there was a muddy edge of
disgust in it. I straightened slightly, bitter at his reaction, and turned
toward him, frowning. It took him only a moment to notice my expression and the
nervous thrumming in him boomed like thunder as Hardy spoke.

“They were taken, not hidden.
We found chaos, panic, crying
humans
, but no trace of the
children.
”

I squirmed slightly at the
picture he painted
.
Crying humans and chaos meant
missing
kids
to me.
I
had enough experience with parental panic to imagine how bad it could
have been. My mother had nearly had a meltdown once when my brother Thomas had
hidden too thoroughly in a hall closet. Three sets of parents finding out their
children had
been kidnapped
would have been a million
times worse.

“
Okay,
” I said after a few moments, still
stuck
in the memory of my own mother’
s
anxiety. Pity for the missing children and their distraught parents was
sloshing in my belly like I’d sucked down a gallon of olive oil; I was feeling
more than a little sick.

“We were assured you would be
of help!” Laurel said when my silence stretched on. “
Are you
helping? Why do you not answer?”

I looked his way as Hardy
mumbled something I couldn’t understand and Laurel quieted
.
Begrudgingly, he lowered his head slightly as if he’
d
been chastised
.
His
humiliation wasn’t any more pleasant to experience than any of his other
emotions.

I turned to Chloe, realizing
the feeling of her was nearly lost against the riot of Laurel’s revolving
psyche. She was watching me intently, fascinated
and
impressed, all worry over the appearance of our guests gone from her mind. I
liked the way she was looking at me, actually. It was rare to surprise her,
especially in such a positive way.

I was pretty impressed with
myself, come to think of it. Not ten minutes ago I’d wanted to pee my pants and
hide under my desk. Now here I was being given the respect of two beasts that
had haunted my nightmares since childhood.
I
latched
on
to her
awe
, using
it
to
muffle
the greasy pity and Laurel’s
painful remorse.

I took a deep breath,
focusing on Chloe and on the fact that I’d been asked to help reunite three
families. I considered my own fear as a child when I’d been confronted by these
so-called scouts, and how awful it had to be for three kids who were taken from
their families before they’d even been given a chance at being judged harmless
and left in a sandbox
.

What if whatever had taken
them was worse than these two? I might’ve been only hope these kids had. I
couldn’t turn my back on them, not if there was anything at all I could do.

“
I
’
ll
help,
” I announced. I wasn’t sure how, or what, but
something had to be done and I knew I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if I
didn’t at least try. Maybe I’d impress Chloe again and think of something
brilliant that would save the day. These two certainly thought I had it in me;
maybe they were right and I’d have the little ones home by the end of the week.

“You are most gracious
,
” Hardy said, bowing low. Laurel followed suit, though
I could feel how much he disliked doing so. “
Your
mistress has chosen wisely.”

There was that mistress
again. Did they mean Chloe? We weren’t dating, but maybe they had assumed
differently. As if she knew I was thinking about her, Chloe spoke up.

“What can you tell us about
these
kids?
Names? Ages? Can you tell us
what powers they have?
We
’re going to need something
to go on besides the fact that they’re children.” She made a good point and I
felt shame creep in to needle my pride until it started to deflate. I hadn’t
even thought that far. So much for having a snap of brilliance that would save
the day.

Laurel tensed as if he might
stand up but both he and Hardy remained bowed down like they were expecting me
to behead them. Chloe gave it a beat before exasperation fizzed through her and
she gestured at me to speak.

“
Uh, stand,
answer her
,
” I
said, at a loss as to what exactly they needed to hear. This time, they didn’t
hesitate, focusing on me even though Chloe had been the one to ask the
question.

“We are told where to locate
the children, but this time we found there were none present
,
” Hardy explained.
“This
has happened in the past, but three times in such a short span is not right.
The balance between our world and the human world may be in danger. We have
been unable to track the children and do not know how to make sure it is done,
and discreet.”

“And you were told I could do
better?”

“Your resources are vast.
Your mistress passed along a list of your accomplishments when sending word we
were to meet you.”

“You spoke with my mistress?”
I guess they didn’t mean Chloe after all.
She likes
messing with me sometimes, but there was no way she’d been in on this
beforehand.

Laurel
’s eyes bugged out so hard I thought they’d burst and
get carried away on the ocean of panic that washed over him.
As Laurel
sputtered and began to shake
as if he’
d
explode, Hardy clarified.

“An emissary was sent to us.
We dare not waste your mistress’s time with our presence. She called upon us.
Please understand we did not mean to imply we have sway with her.”

“
No,
” I shook my head, desperate to flush out
Laurel
’
s
tumultuous fear as it flapped
through my chest like a bickering
murder
of crows. “I didn’t mean it like that, jeez.”

Hardy
’s square face pulled tight as he looked between us
and I wondered if he was catching on to how unpleasant I found it to be near
his partner.

“We are sorry we could not be
of more assistance, but surely you have connections and means that we can only
dream of. If there is nothing else you require of us, we will take our leave.”

I liked that idea. “Yeah, you
can go. I just need to know how to contact you if I find anything.”

Hardy
winced, his massive shoulders hunching up around his
neck
.
“You need not waste your
breath. We will come when you need us.”

“
It
’s that simple?”
I asked.
It couldn’t be
that easy. I glanced at Chloe and then back. They weren’t there
.
“What the hell?”

I did a quick turn, sweeping
my gaze around the office, trying to figure out where they’
d gone. The door hadn
’t opened, the only window in
the room was too small for even Chloe to get through, and I was pretty sure we
didn’t have any trap doors under the rug. They couldn’t just be
gone
.
Surely they’d blown up or been reduced to a puddle of some sort? When
blinking and leaning forward to swipe my hand through the empty air where
they’d been didn’t tell me anything, I turned
to Chloe.

“Where did they go? What the
hell just happened?”

She had a question of her
own.
“You have a
m
istress
?
”

Chapter
Three

I hustl
ed Chloe out of the office, shushing her when she
tried to speak. I didn’t want to risk Laurel and Hardy coming back with more
questions or the realization that I wasn’t who they thought I was. They seemed
pretty scared of me, but if they figured out they’d just bowed and groveled
before a lowly level three human who didn’t have a scary mistress, that would
likely change. Laurel had already seemed halfway set on taking me out. I didn’t
want to risk Hardy and his
dangerous
tusks feeling the same way.
 
I didn’t relax until we were
buckled into Chloe’
s little sedan.

“Do you have a second job I
don’t know about?” Chloe demanded as she started the car.

I shook my head rapidly.
“
No! I
’
m
way too lazy, you know that! They clearly thought I was someone else.”

“Obviously
,
”
Chloe said
, back to being her unflappable self. Meanwhile, I was
practically vibrating, eager to get as far away from the dark office as
possible.
“I mean, they looked at little old human me
first.”

“
I
’
m
human!
”
I
insisted. “They shouldn’t have been looking at either one of us!”
  

“Yes, but you’
re
human-plus. Human with benefits. I don’t know if I’d
call you
super
-human, but—”

“
Okay, stop. I get it. And
hey! You pointed them straight
at me
.
What if they were there to
hurt me—or hurt whoever they think I am?”

“
I panicked!
” she admitted. “Believe me. If things had been
different, I wouldn’t have put you in that position.” There was a trace of
disappointment in her and it was clinging like a slug to the greasy edge of her
guilt
.
“
I
’
m so sorry.
”

I knew she was sorry. I could
feel it, though I didn’t want to—not just because it was an unpleasant
experience, but because none of this was her fault.

“
It
’
s okay,”
I soothed, wishing I could project
feelings, not just receive them. “It was... um, I don't know what that was, but
they weren’t there to hurt me. They seemed to be scared of me, actually. I
don’t think anyone’s ever been scared of me before.”

“Except the pizza boy when
he’s late with your dinner.”

“
Well, he
’s asking for it,”
I
agreed, shaking my fist
as
comically as I could manage
.
As I
’d hoped,
Chloe
laughed
and we both went quiet for a
few minutes, basking in the glow of not feeling terror or worry. Finally, I
piped up.

“Did I really just agree to
help them? Me? Why would I do that?
I don
’t
know the first thing about finding
kidnapped
children. I
’ve
lost two cell phones in the last year. What was I thinking, agreeing to handle
this?”

“I think you were thinking
that two scary monsters were standing in front of you, telling you that they’d
found parents in distress over their missing offspring. Not even you could turn
your back on that.”

“
Not even me?
” I rolled my gaze her way
and caught the slight smile on her lips. She was teasing me. Instead of giving
in to her ribbing, I pushed ahead with the matter at hand. “
We
should look into that before anything else. If
families have just gotten wise and found some way of hiding their kids from
these... things, then there may not be a problem at all.”

“You could ask Mel to help!”
Chloe suggested. Cheer tap-danced out of her psyche and all over mine. I ground
my teeth, trying my best to figure out a reason why I would not—
could
not
—
ask Mel Somerset for help. Sure, he
’s a successful
p
rivate
i
nvestigator, but he’s also
Mel
.

“
Fine!
” I huffed after my brain failed to offer me an out. “You
can call him tomorrow morning and ask if he’s willing.
I don
’t want to ask him for anything. He might take it as
an invitation to take his pants off.”

“You should invite him to
take his pants off anyway,”
Chloe said, her
optimism fluttering against my grumpiness and
threatening to suffocate it. “Not now, of course.
 
Wait until he’s helped find the kids and
then pay him in sex.”

“I hate you both.”

“
You love me,
” she said, patting my thigh. It reminded me of my
sister, which wasn’t surprising, since Chloe is practically family. In fact,
they both have the frustrating habit of trying to get me to take proper care of
myself and laughing at me when I fight them on it. God help me if they ever
teamed up.

“
Fine,
” I said again, calmer this time. I wanted to hold
onto my
grouchiness
, as it had conveniently
taken over for the fear I’d felt around Laurel and Hardy, but I knew Chloe
wasn’t going to let me. Just being this close to her, I could feel myself
cheering up, absorbing her giddiness through my pores. “I love you, but not
Mel. Never Mel.”

“
Okay,
” Chloe said, though I could tell she wasn’t really
agreeing with me.

***

Midnight ticked past and I
let out a groan, rolling onto my back in hopes the ceiling might drop onto my
head and forcibly knock me unconscious. I wouldn’t be getting any sleep without
outside help. My brain was racing, going over the night’s events in a nervous,
spastic
,
rambling way. I couldn’t
make my thoughts line up coherently, so they jumped from moment to moment.

One second I was seeing the
face of the man at the bar, the next Laurel’s expression when I’d tried to
shake his hand. After that, I had moved onto trying to make a list of groceries
to buy. Two items in (honey and sugar) and my brain hopped back to the dark
office and the look on Chloe’s face when I’d addressed our strange visitors so
flippantly.

I wasn’t sure how much Chloe
knew about the magical world around us, but I was guessing it was probably less
than me. And I barely knew anything. My general knowledge is kind of hazy, and
my
personal
knowledge pretty much stops
at Mel the
werewolf
gumshoe and the fact that
both my siblings have powers like mine.

Of the three of us, I
definitely got the rawest deal. My brother Thomas is preternaturally lucky. The
day he’d turned eighteen, he bought a lotto ticket and won. That isn’t even the
best thing that’s happened to him in his short life, either. The kid manages to
avoid nearly every bad situation that might come his way. I can’t even tell you
how many times I’ve seen him pause, weave, or duck for seemingly no reason
,
only to watch bird poop drop right into the spot
where he’d previously been.

My older sister Robin has a
form of very minor mind control that’s activated by touch. She can’t make you
fling yourself off a building or stick your tongue to a frozen metal pole, but
if you’re ambivalent about doing the dishes and she gets her paws on you,
you’ll be elbow-deep in dishwater before you know it.

Then there’s me, the empath
stuck working in the same building as a werewolf who thinks it’s hilarious to
show up and rub his stupid emotions all over the place. I know my mom is just a
plain, Chloe-level human, but I’ve long suspected my father has something extra
going for him. The fact that he’s with my mom—a woman way out of his
league if you ask any of us kids—is enough to convince me. But there
hasn’t been a second of my life past age twelve where my father and I have been
able to communicate maturely. Three words into any conversation and we devolve
into a screaming match that is only won when one of us storms off screaming
nonsensical insults.

I
’ve never had the guts to ask about any abilities he
may have because doing so would require I talk either to or about him. Neither
prospect is appealing.

Other than the first time I’d
seen Laurel and Hardy as a child, I’d mostly managed to avoid the magical
world. Sure,
Madeline
at
the café was a creature of some sort and Mel was around more than I would
prefer, but I’d never run afoul of a leprechaun or discovered a sword of
plus-five dexterity. I couldn’t even tell you if those things existed. If I’d
had my way, my first interaction with Laurel and Hardy would have been the last
scary, magical thing I’d ever dealt with. Even spending the evening talking
with them like we were all people and none of us were horrifying
hadn
’t entirely quelled my fear. If
they
were out
there, who knew what else there was?

No, I had no interest in
stumbling on
something with tentacles in place of eyeballs or
a taste for empath kidneys. Once these kids were safe and sound, it was back to
blissful ignorance for me. Although, if I could get Hardy to pay me by taking
Mel off my hands, it might actually turn out to be worth running into them
again.

Rubbing my hands over my
face, I wondered if I had any cold medicine I could chug to knock me out. The
idea of anything alcoholic magnifying my empathy even temporarily
wasn
’t appealing—there's a
gopher in my backyard that's perpetually grumpy, though I don't mind when I
catch wind of squirrel emotions—so I fumbled around on my dresser and
grabbed my mobile phone.
I chose the most relaxing
music I had to play and settled in to give sleep one last shot.

Wishing I had my sister there
to order me to catch some Zs, I curled up on my side and decided to count
sheep. Thoughts of farm animals made me wonder if Mel had ever blown a house
down around a were-pig. Strangely, that put me right out.

***

My night was anything but
peaceful, my restlessness due mainly to strange, walrus-and-bear-filled dreams.
I finally gave up on my bed at just after five-thirty, shuffling like a zombie
out to Sonny’
s cage.
The second my pet
sun c
onure heard my footsteps dragging along the floor, he
started calling to me, welcoming me to the new day as loudly as he could. I
grumbled back but my puffy face and lack of enthusiasm didn’t deter him. In
fact, he started ringing his bells at me the closer I got, as if he was aware
of my empathy and hoped to infused cheer straight through my pores.

The loud greetings continued
as I unlatched his cage and reached in to rub his bright yellow chin. Before I
could stop him, he zigzagged his colorful little body and climbed onto my hand
and up my arm. I let him pick through my hair lovingly as I padded down the
hall. We made idle conversation while I slowly made my way back to my room and
bathroom, where Sonny hung out on a perch I’d had installed in place of a towel
rack along the back wall.

Time to wake up, Gwen.

After the shower
,
I scooped Sonny up, dropped him back on my robed
shoulder
,
and shuffled barefoot to the
kitchen. Nothing looked out of place at first. My kitchen is long and L-shaped,
with my dining table stashed around the corner. I grabbed a plastic cup off the
counter next to the sink and filled it straight from the tap. As I turned
toward the fridge, the cup slipped out of my hand onto the floor.

My refrigerator looked like
someone had sneezed words all over it.

Someone had come into my
house and opened up what looked
to
be
all my boxes
of magnetic poetry, nearly covering the fridge and freezer door with crooked,
sideways, and occasionally upside
-
down phrases. I couldn’t read
them from my position, but I instantly pictured Laurel and Hardy carefully
detailing some sort of magnetic manifesto about how they were going to take
revenge on me for lying to them. As I closed in and read some, though, I
realized that would have been ridiculous for several reasons.

Sonny squawked, curious about
my sudden tension. I turned, got a bird-kiss on my lips
,
and set him down so he could patrol the counters. Stepping around the
puddle, I walked back to the fridge.

The sentences were whole but
unrelated. The diatribe started with, “
Mind the towels
” and “
Jewelry, pizza
,
and wine: make it happen
,
” then rambled on for the entire length of my fridge. After the fourth
line (
The Gavel will bang again),
I gave up reading them individually
and just started scanning for a pattern. Nothing jumped out at me, though the
magnets proclaiming “
Princess Mel
”
gave me pause.
My brain gifted me with an
image of Mel in a frilly dress, tossing his hair out the window of a tall
tower, and I started giggling. It was half exhaustion and at least a quarter
nervous energy, but it felt good to laugh regardless. Realizing I was going to
need documentation of this to prove to myself I wasn’t going crazy, I fled to
my office to grab my camera.