Miss Taken (22 page)

“Oh. Okay. But that isn’t a very nice thing
to say about a guy you’re dating.” Honestly, I wouldn’t care if
Kyle dropped off the face of the earth. But it was disconcerting to
hear Hannah talk about people she supposedly liked behind their
back. It brought back memories of the old Hannah that I would like
to believe was gone for good.

“I’m not dating him.” She rolled her eyes
again (ER)2. “I just did it for revenge.”

I stopped dead in my tracks. “What?”

“I did it to get back at him. I found out
that he was messing with you and Diana.”

“How did you find out about Diana?”

Yet another ER. They must be on repeat.
“Jane. You don’t have to be a math genius to know how to put two
and two together.”

I am starting to understand that being a
“math genius” (other people’s words, not mine) does not mean that
one understands everything. Or even anything.

She continued, “I also found out that he
intentionally tried to screw things up with you and Ned, so I
decided to mess with his head a little.”

“How do you know that?”

Hannah regarded me with dead fish eyes. “A
little birdie told me.”

I should know better than to question the
Master. “Okay, why would he do that?”

She huffed impatiently. “Haven’t you ever
wanted anything just because someone else had it?”

I found it convenient not to answer.

“It was just a game, to see if he could make
you like him.”

I could only stare as I tried to process this
information.

“Yup, he’s messed up. I mean, he’s got to be
at least part screwball to go around telling people he’s from
Tahiti when he’s from Providence.” She shook as she giggled in
disbelief.

I, on the other hand, was quaking with rage.
If Kyle had suddenly appeared before me, I would not have been able
to be held accountable for my actions. Extenuating circumstances
and a justifiable homicide defense would be absolutely admissible
in this case.

Hannah said, “Oh, and the irony wasn’t lost
on me, by the way.” She looked at me sardonically.

I had the grace to blush, but it only lasted
a second. I said, “Sorry,” purely as a matter of form and then went
right back to being furious with that jerk, that idiot, that loser
from a state that only has water on one side of it who had yanked
me around like a puppet.

“Oh, it’s okay,” replied Hannah, oblivious to
my thoughts. “It was kind of cool. The way I got to help you, but
also pay you back at the same time. Symmetrical, you know?” Then
she smiled at me, but not in a mean way. She bumped me with her hip
and winked.

Why I ever thought it would be a good idea to
enlighten the mathematically-challenged population of this town, I
do not know.

I smiled to acknowledge that we were still
buddies. But now I wished she would go the hell away so I could get
to work on my revenge plans.

I said I was going to wait for my mom
outside.

Hannah wouldn’t be shaken off. “My advice?
Just ignore him completely. Act as if he doesn’t exist. Guys can’t
stand to be ignored.”

I told her through gritted teeth that I
appreciated her input, but that I really had to be going, although
that was total crap since we could both see that my mom’s car
wasn’t here yet.

Hannah kept hanging on. “Trust me. Just
forget about the guy.” She shrugged again. “You’re happy with Ned.”
Silent was the implication ‘for some unknown reason.’ “Ignore him,”
she repeated. I thought the lady was protesting too much, but she
is so much better at this game than I am, I nodded just to shut her
up.

Finally my mother who is only punctual for
her own convenience arrived and I escaped the supposedly
well-meaning pep talk from a very complex girl I wasn’t sure I
trusted anymore.

As soon as we got home, I raced up to my room
to think. I was supposed to see Ned later that afternoon for a few
hours and I had to compose myself enough to not blab about
Kyle.

For I had no idea of ever telling Ned what
Hannah had told me. If I was still furious over Kyle’s little game,
there was no telling what Ned might do, including dump me again for
mentioning the kid’s name.

He came over and we snuggled up on the rec
room couch. I had thought ahead and stashed Trey’s clothes back in
the laundry room to make the place look a little tidier even if it
made the couch much less comfortable. Also, the gentle lavender in
the fabric softener does more than a person might think to help
combat the stinkiness of an old couch.

Mom came downstairs and gave us the eye, but
not until after we had accomplished some very pleasant smooching. I
should also note that she thoughtfully made a lot of noise at the
top of the stairs before descending. By the time she arrived, we
were sitting up with a chaste foot of cushion between us. Something
was playing on the TV but if Mom had taken it into her mind to quiz
us on the plot, we would have been in trouble.

She said hello to Ned in a not-hostile
fashion after surreptitiously checking us out for indications of
clothing being replaced in a hurry.

“Are you staying for dinner tonight?” she
asked, none too amiable after noticing a certain dishevelment to
our hair. But still, it was an improvement on her side.

“No - thank you, Mrs. H-G. I have to be home
for dinner tonight,” Ned answered.

Mom doesn’t care for the way he shortens her
name. But I give her a C- for the job she did hiding her pleasure
that Ned would not be staying much longer.

She took her sweet time in the laundry room
too. After Mom finally went back upstairs, we got in a few good
ones, but then Trey came tootling down, whistling loudly. We
reseparated. I could not suppress a loudish sigh. Trey changed the
channel to some game or other and then sat down as far away from us
as possible. He said to the TV, “Mom told me to come watch the game
down here.”

That meddling killjoy! And, yes, I mean my
mother. Ned and I had weeks of catch-up kissing to do and here she
was, ruining all my fun. Since we couldn’t do anything
constructive, I asked Ned if he would like to at least knock out
the homework. He kind of snorted but in the end agreed when I
pointed out that neither of us was interested in football.

“Basketball.”

Whatever.

We went up and sat at the kitchen table. I
caught my mother smirking smugly and I detested her even more, if
that were possible.

I said louder than necessary, “So about the
homework...” and then ostentatiously and completely unnecessarily
flung a few papers around.

Ned swallowed a laugh - then he squeezed my
knee under the table and left his hand there. I felt an extra
thrill flaunting my mom’s attempt to keep two hormonal teenagers
from touching each other right under her nose.

It didn’t help my concentration, however. I
was glad my dad wasn’t in the room to hear my confused explanation
of inverted equations.

I walked Ned out to his car and we did a
furious amount of kissing in the space of five minutes. When I
finally decided we were risking my mother coming outside, Ned
groaned and said some very sexy things about kidnapping me and
taking me to an exotic island where parents were forbidden
entry.

I floated back into the house on that dream
and if I would have run into Kyle at that moment, I think I could
have shot him a very friendly hello.

This is neither strange nor scientific, but
it is a fact: Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.

Since I had all Sunday to myself, my anger
had time to ramp back up again. I also wanted to make up with
Diana, and warn her off her sonnet-reciting, two-timing jerk. I
called her at noon, sharp. She almost hung up on me, but I groveled
a little, and I could tell she liked it. She said she would meet me
at the neutral zone of the rez in an hour. I had a vision of us
dueling with stalks of dried weeds at twenty paces and had to
stifle a snort of laughter.

“Our native plants are in danger of being
overrun by all these foreign invasives, Jane.”

I swallowed another snort. “That
wasn’t...never mind.”

We met at the appointed location, Diana
dressed as a lumberjack/fisherman, collecting sack hanging by her
ample hip, me in practical stirrup pants and lace bolero jacket
because it’s important not to sacrifice everything to comfort.

“So,” said Diana sourly.

I wasn’t even going to let her get started.
“Oh, Diana,” I said taking her hand. “Listen, this is important.
I’m back with Ned, so what I’m about to tell you is only for your
own good and not because we’re in some sort of silly rivalry over
some stupid boy.”

Diana bridled at my use of the word ‘stupid’
to describe Kyle, but I cut her off again, promising to keep it
brief.

“Listen, Kyle is double - he’s triple-timing
you! We were involved in a love - I had to think about it -
quadrangle! I went out to the mall with him two weeks ago on a
Friday night, and he had made a date with Hannah right after me! I
saw them together with my own eyes! Trust me, this Rhode Island Red
is a turkey.”

Diana didn’t even crack a smile at my
comparison. Rather, she was looking a little pale. She also looked
like she could use a chair. I found us a dry log to sit on.

“What Friday was that?” she asked
faintly.

“Um, I don’t remember the date, was it the
twenty-sixth?”

“The twenty-fifth,” she replied, much too
quickly.

“Okay, then it was the twenty-fifth.”

There was a pause. “What time did you meet
him?”

“Around seven-thirtyish.”

Diana actually clutched at my arm. “He had a
date with Hannah too, you say?” She was shaking. It wasn’t that
cold out.

“Yup. Not only that, he’s from Rhode Island!
I don’t know if he fed you the line about being from some exciting
foreign land, but Hannah filled me in. I’m still working on my
plan, but I want to get him back good...Are you okay?”

Diana looked like a Weeble who was about to
wobble off the log. “He’s not from Bora Bora?” she whispered. Then
she sat up straight and gripped her satchel. I was dying to know if
the Wonder Woman suit was in that bag of hers. She turned to me
with steel in her eyes. She barked at me like a seasoned drill
sergeant or possibly even a petty officer of the navy, “What have
you come up with?”

And just like that, we were friends again,
united against the common enemy of one ordinary boy from a
completely ordinary city that looks out on some very murky, gray
water.

Strange but true scientific facts about stick
insects: They are great at camouflage, and even use it to hide
their eggs as seeds on the forest floor. They regurgitate a nasty
substance as a defense mechanism and can reproduce
parthenogenetically; that is, they do not need males.

I went to school Monday morning with the
intention of being cool, calm and composed, and then knocking
Kyle’s sunglass-wearing, fake-gum-chewing, twinkling-earring,
freckle-face all back to the smallest state in the nation by
letting him have it with a smart (but figurative) slap.

I just had to make it through math without
Ned being overly affectionate. I was confident Diana would do her
part well. Now if she had just worn something cool instead of that
ridiculously ugly taupe pant suit that neither flatters her skin
nor communicates any meaningful emotion like I had when I got
dressed that morning. If Kyle knew anything about anything, he
would have steered clear of the serpent in the green satin boat
neck blouse and houndstooth flannel trousers today.

But he didn’t notice a thing. There were no
worries about Ned because he came in so late, he had to start
scribbling right away. It would have taken a suspicious and
extremely sharp-eyed person to discern the sly, sexy looks we were
giving each other. Kyle was neither.

Diana did a fantastic job of chatting up Kyle
like he was still the most fascinating boy who ever came from Rhode
Island.

I went to talk to Mr. Hiro, ostensibly to ask
him about an extra credit project I invented on the spot so Kyle
would walk with Diana and be well on his way to biology as Ned took
a full thirty seconds to smooch unobserved. I even managed a smile
for Sophie. I figured I owed her that much, even though I still say
it is creepy and more than a little rude that she was watching us
like that.

I raced down to bio and made it just as the
bell rang. Garrulous Garrone announced we would be doing a lab. Raj
volunteered to work with Christie who was partnerless that day. How
perfect. I wasn’t even offended at all that Raj would want to work
with that airheaded twit rather than me. His thoughtfulness was
going to give me the time to really sock it to Kyle.

We gathered our microscopes and slides and
settled back at our table. I gave Kyle an evil smile worthy of
Hannah, but he didn’t catch on. We worked quietly on our slides,
identifying and classifying and we finished quickly, as usual. Kyle
started to write up his report. I nudged him.

“So,” I whispered. “Why don’t you tell me
more about your exciting upbringing on that exotic island of
yours.”

Kyle waggled his eyebrows at me with a smile
in a way that was supposed to be mysterious and enticing, I’m sure.
I gave him another evil smile and saw him swallow. There was panic
in his eyes as he focused on his papers.

A few minutes went by. Kyle worked intently
on his report and I sat there, drumming the table top with my
pencil. “So?”

“Just trying to finish this up,” he said
brightly.

When he could no longer pretend he was
filling out his report, he started to make busy work with the
equipment. As he polished the microscope to a state it hadn’t seen
since it was first purchased in 1665, I poked him again. “Well? I’m
waiting.”