Midsummer Magic (27 page)

Maybe he was being so standoffish with her because he was still hurting too. Perhaps all she needed to do was come clean, say sorry, and say what was going on her head. She can’t have imagined what they’d had between them. It had been special. She knew he’d felt it too. If only she could remind him of how they used to be, everything would be all right again and they could put the past behind them …

It was a nice dream. But a foolish one. This story wasn’t going to end the way she wanted. They never did. Diana should be used to it by now. She was coming to the conclusion that she was never going to find someone to live happily ever after with.

Still, a girl could fantasise … It was getting a little chilly and Harry looked cosy and warm. There could be no harm in snuggling up to him …

She lay down next to him, and Harry rolled over and put his arms round her. For a moment, she lay in blissful happiness, imagining that she was lying next to Ant, before he ruined it entirely, by saying ‘Josie’ really loudly.

She knew she was kidding herself, Ant was never going to fall for her again. But she was tired, and if she just shut her eyes, in her dreams he could be hers …

Harry was having a lovely dream about Josie, about when they’d first met. She was coming towards him in a pretty floral dress, her long fair curls flapping in the breeze, saying shyly, ‘It’s Harry isn’t it?’

He could still remember the thrill when he closed his hand over hers, and said ‘yes,’ and they’d walked off together, as they went to the theatre as if it was the most natural thing in the world to do. Things like that never happened to Harry. They happened to Ant all the time, but not to Harry. It had been such a sweet moment, he recalled, as he woke up slowly and found himself cuddling her. How lovely. This whole mad night had been a bad dream. Here was Josie in bed beside him, and everything was going to be okay.

Except … something wasn’t quite right. He was lying on something hard and stony. A bush was poking in his back. And as the person lying beside him rolled round and stared at him, he groaned in dismay.

‘Diana?’ he said, incredulous. What was she doing here?

At that moment, he heard voices coming down the path towards them, and the next thing he knew …

‘Harry, you bastard, you bloody bastard!’ Josie was standing over him, looking shattered.

‘Josie, this isn’t how it looks,’ Harry got up to try and remonstrate.

‘I trusted you!’ said Josie, delivering a stinging slap around his cheeks, before running into the darkness.

‘What’s going on?’ Diana was sitting up, looking really confused.

‘I have no idea,’ said Harry. ‘But thanks for nothing!’

He shot off in the darkness to find Josie. He had to make her understand that nothing had happened, or they really
were
finished.

Ant was flabbergasted. Of all the things he’d expected to see, it hadn’t been that. Maybe despite his denials, Harry did have a thing going on with Diana, although it didn’t seem likely. He’d looked so distraught when Josie had slapped him. Ant was at a loss as to what to do now. They seemed locked in a nightmarish situation, which looked like never getting resolved.

But maybe you’ve got more chance with Josie now, said a whispering voice in his head. Maybe. Or maybe she’ll be blaming you for setting the whole thing up …

‘Oh, God, oh, God, I’m such a fool.’

Ant had almost forgotten Di. What was going on there? Had she changed her mind about him, and transferred her attentions to Harry? She was rocking herself backwards and forwards, crying. Awkwardly, Ant sat down next to her. Another crying woman. What had he done to deserve this? He’d never spent so much time comforting crying women without some kind of reward. It was an odd feeling.

‘Hey, it’s not as bad as that,’ he said. ‘I can see you’re a bit confused this evening, but how do you know what you or any of us think we’re feeling is real? Freddie’s messed with our minds good and proper.’

That applied to the way he felt about Josie, he realised with a jolt. Could he be sure those emotions were real? They certainly
felt
real.

‘I don’t know,’ said Diana. ‘I’m not just upset about screwing things up for Harry and Josie. It’s life in general. I’m single, jobless, talentless. I’ve worked so hard to get where I am, and now I’ve lost it all. My dad will feel completely vindicated when I tell him. He never thought I should go into the travel business.’

‘Now that is ridiculous,’ said Ant. ‘From what I recall, your dad never understood how talented you are. Talented and gorgeous.’

He surprised himself by saying it, but he’d suddenly remembered how insecure Di had always been, and how little support her parents had given her. Somehow he felt he wanted to cheer her up …

‘Do you really think so?’ said Di, looking shy. ‘But look at me. I’m unemployed, don’t even own my own flat,
and
single.’

‘Cheer up, worse things happen at sea,’ said Ant.

‘I doubt that somehow,’ said Diana.

‘Don’t be too hard on yourself,’ said Ant, putting his arms round her and giving her a hug. ‘It’s been a weird night, and quite frankly the way Josie’s been banging on about the wedding, I’m not surprised Harry’s been having second thoughts. That’s not your fault.’

‘She has been a bit hideous hasn’t she?’ Diana laughed.

They sat for a few moments, feeling the wind on their cheeks, and Ant felt something harmonious pass between them. Not that he wanted to get back together, or anything, but at least it was a start to being friends again.

Night was passing and the moon was getting low in the sky.

‘I’d almost forgotten you could be like this,’ said Diana.

‘Like what?’

‘Nice,’ said Diana, looking dreamy. ‘Kind. You hide it well, but it’s still there.’

‘Thanks,’ said Ant, ‘you’re not so bad yourself.’

He gave her a squeeze.

‘Friends?’ he said.

‘Friends,’ said Diana.

Friends. So much better than enemies.

Diana felt as if her heart was going to explode sitting next to Ant. It was as though the man she’d once known was just re-emerging; maybe he would reconnect with her, remember too what they’d had.

‘Why did you stop being kind to people?’ said Diana. ‘Was it my fault?’

Ant didn’t say anything, but continued to stare out to sea.

‘Why didn’t you give me a chance to explain?’ he said.

The question hung between them. It was a fair point, and Di suddenly realised she’d been carrying her bitterness around with her for so long, it had never occurred to her she could have asked him his side of the story.

‘What were you going to say that would have made a difference?’ she said. ‘I’d have thought it was obvious.’

‘Not to me it wasn’t,’ said Ant. ‘You spent weeks avoiding me, and then you disappeared one evening. I was frantic. I looked everywhere for you and no one knew where you’d gone.’

‘Yeah, it looked like it,’ said Diana, remembering the churning uncertainty of that night. ‘I came back from hospital and you were in the bar all over Sian like a rash.’

‘Sian was comforting me,’ said Ant.

‘Is that what you call it?’ Old habits die hard, and she felt angry all over again.

‘Yes,’ said Ant. ‘Di, listen, please.’

Something about the urgency in the way he spoke made her pause. It was time she heard him out.

‘I genuinely thought you’d gone off me. You were always working shifts when I was free. Sian kept hinting that you were doing it deliberately, and even that you’d found someone else,’ he said. ‘I was worrying you were cheating on me.’

‘Oh,’ Diana wasn’t sure whether to believe him. ‘Did you believe her?’

‘I didn’t know what to think,’ said Ant. ‘I wanted to ask you but I didn’t have the nerve, in case you told me we were finished. And then you ditched me in front of everyone.’

‘But Sian
knew
,’ said Diana. ‘I told her about the miscarriage before I went to hospital. She was meant to tell you. Are you telling me she never did?’

‘She never breathed a word,’ said Ant. ‘I know I’m a lot of things, but I would never have left you to go through that on your own. I am so sorry.’

Diana took a sharp intake of breath and blinked away the tears.

‘All these years,’ she said, ‘and I blamed you. It’s me who should be sorry.’

‘I was a bit of a shit to you afterwards,’ said Ant. ‘I thought you didn’t love me anymore. Sian was meant to be my consolation prize. God, she was a piece of work.’

‘Wasn’t she just?’ said Diana.

‘Why didn’t you tell me you were pregnant?’

‘I nearly did,’ said Diana. ‘It never felt like the right moment, and then I lost the baby, and you … We were so young, and I was frightened you wouldn’t support me, and then it looked as if you wouldn’t.’

‘And I let you down,’ said Ant. ‘For what it’s worth, I was devastated when I found out about the baby from the message on my answerphone. I wanted to go after you, but Sian said to leave it. I can’t believe I was daft enough to listen. I’m sorry, Di. You deserved better. Much better.’

To her astonishment, there were tears in his eyes.

She stared into his eyes. This was her moment, it had to be.

Leaning forward, she kissed him on the lips.

Ant leapt back as if he’d been scalded.

‘Di, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean …’ He let go of her hand, and got up. ‘I’m sorry, Di, it’s not you, it’s me.’

And with that, he stumbled off into the dark, leaving Diana alone with her broken heart.

Harry stumbled through the darkness, calling Josie’s name. Where had she gone now? He had a feeling she wasn’t going back home.

He felt wrecked from this evening. Utterly wrecked. He wished he’d never set eyes on bloody Diana for a start, or let himself get pushed into the whole engagement thing. He knew he wanted to spend the rest of his life with Josie, but the rest of his life was a long time. Marriage could wait. He wanted to have adventures with Josie, see the world before they settled down. If he hadn’t been such an idiot and proposed when he had, they could be living happily together right now, without any of this pressure. Standing on this cliffedge looking out to sea, thinking about all the adventurers who’d left these shores in olden days, made him feel suddenly confined and restricted. He’d always played safe, been Mr Dependable. Now it was time to do something different, be someone different. And if Josie didn’t want that person, so be it.

He found her on a small beach which led away from the cliff, to one side of the theatre. He remembered them picnicking here once. It had been a happy, relaxed day, early in their courtship. Maybe the fact that she was here was a good sign …

‘Josie,’ he said. She was sitting still on a rock, looking ghostly white in the pale moonlight, for all the world like an enchantress who’d just come out of the sea. She didn’t say anything, so he hunkered down next to her.

‘Look, I’m not going to beg, and I’m not going to plead, but hear me out, will you? I know things have gone wrong between us this weekend, but you have to believe me. I love you more than anything else in the world, and I would never hurt you.’

‘But not enough to marry me,’ said Josie. ‘And not enough not to cheat with my best friend.’

‘I fell asleep and woke up to find Di beside me,’ said Harry. ‘I’m not remotely interested in Diana. You can believe that or not, but it’s the truth. When have I ever lied to you?’

‘When you asked me to marry you?’ said Josie.

‘Oh, that,’ said Harry.

‘Yes,
that
,’ said Josie, looking angry.

‘I do want to marry you,’ said Harry. ‘But not yet. I think we’ve rushed things. I know it’s my fault, but there’s a whole world out there. Come and see it with me, please. I want to travel, but not alone.’

Josie said nothing.

‘That’s it,’ said Harry. ‘That’s all I have to say. I’m going back now. And in the morning I’m going home. Then I’m going to plan a world tour. I hope you’ll be with me, but if not, I’m going anyway.’

Josie still didn’t say anything, twisting her finger round and round, till eventually he realised what she was doing.

‘No, Josie,’ he said, tears choking him, ‘no, please don’t do this.’

‘Sorry,’ she said, crying too, as she handed him the ring, ‘it’s over.’

Harry took the ring without another word, and turned round to leave. There was nothing more to be said.

Josie sat back down on a rock after he’d gone, staring out to sea. Her thoughts were a mixed jumble. She’d been so excited about this weekend, excited to be marrying Harry, how could it all have gone so wrong?

He’d never said anything serious before about wanting adventures. Harry had on occasion mentioned going travelling, but in such a jokey way, Josie never thought he meant it. Why did he suddenly want to go travelling now? Unless it was another nonsensical thing that Freddie had put in his head.

What a night. What a bloody night.

She heard a shout from above, and then heard someone frantically scrambling down the path. It was Tatiana, looking somewhat dishevelled.

‘Are you all right?’ said Josie.

‘All right? All right?’ said Tatiana, spitting feathers. ‘The man’s gone completely mad.’

‘Which man?’

‘Mike,’ said Tatiana. ‘He tried – he tried to kiss me!’

She looked so indignant, Josie had to stifle a grin.

‘I can’t believe it. We were
acting,
and then he tried to kiss my arm. It was revolting. He called me – his little flower. Oh, God. Now I’ve probably lost the only chance of ever playing Titania. Why is life so unfair?’

‘Where is he now?’ asked Josie.

‘I don’t know,’ moaned Tatiana, ‘I pushed him over and ran down here.’

A tinkling of stones on the path above led to a panicked look on Tatiana’s face.

‘Hide me, please!’ she said.

‘There’s a cave just there in the corner,’ said Josie. ‘Don’t go too far in, it connects with the cove next door, and it’s easy to get trapped by the sea. You have to know it’s there. He won’t find you, I promise.’

‘You’re an angel,’ said Tatiana, and stumbled off towards the cave.

The sound of footsteps came nearer, and suddenly someone burst onto the beach.