Melted & Shattered (2 page)

Chapter
3

When you’re
in pain and lying in a hospital bed, time sort of means nothing. When the doctor came in to tell me my condition, it could have been there two hours or two weeks that I'd been there. I only half listened, I knew I’d been shot, the bullet going through my left side. The bullet had punctured my stomach and grazed my spleen. The spleen would heal on its own, but they had to stitch my stomach up. They dug the bullet out, and I was lucky it didn’t hit any of my ribs. If they had shattered, that could have done worse damage to my internal organs than the bullet. They were keeping me in the hospital until my stomach was healed enough to handle solid foods. The internal stitches would dissolve, whereas the ones on my left side, where they had cut me open to operate, would be removed manually.

A tube had been down my throat
. That was why it felt so scratchy, but I was assured that would go away in no time. It was already starting to feel better, and could talk quietly for short periods of time.

Chris rarely left
. She only did when Aaron came and forced her to go home and shower, claiming she stank like a musty armpit. I held my side when he said that because laughing hurt like hell. I made Aaron promise not to be his usual funny self. He tried, but it was hard for him because that was his gig. He was the cosmic joker. Without his jokes, he was somber, and it was kinda depressing me.

“Aaron, I love you. And I’
m grateful you love me enough to be here—and send Chris home cuz she was starting to stink. But, you gotta ease up on the heavy.”

“Damnit
, Elle. I can’t joke, so all I can do is tell you how I feel, and I feel insane. You almost died!” He was bringing out the excessive hand gesturing, waving them in the air. He swiped his flattened hand through the air as he exclaimed, “I thought I lost you. Do you know what it feels like to think your best friend has died and you are going to be alone without her?” He beat his fist against his palm with each word as he said, "Do you have any idea?"

“Nooooo, but I know how it feels
to almost die.”  I laughed at my own sarcasm. God, my side hurt. Fucking stitches. Fucking bullet. Fucking Fernie. And fucking J.

“No jokes
. You can’t make them if I can’t.” I put my hands up, surrendering.

“Come here.” I patted the bed for him to come sit with me
. “I love you so much. I only have a few words left before my voice goes out again, but I wanted you to know that.”  His eyes filled with tears. “Come on.” I pulled him down to lay with me, on the right side of the bed. The side that Chris had been occupying. “I’m about to hit this morphine button. The magic button. Stay with me until I fall asleep?”

He nodded, and nestled up next to me
. “Think I can get some of that morphine?” 

“Sure, go ahead,” I mumbled before drifting off.

******

Once word got out that I was alive and awake, people started coming to visit
. All the people I initially made Chris send away came in droves. I thought they might hate me for sending them away, but hey, I was shot. Come on, that gives you permission to be a bit demanding, right? Now that I was feeling better, I was ready to field the questions I knew would start. I asked Chris to get Genesis first.

She came into my room with Angelica
. They looked scared shitless.

“Hey
. Come here.” I waved them over to me. “What’s wrong? Everything is gonna be OK.” 

They came over to the side of my bed and burst into tears
. “We thought you were gonna die,” Genesis said between sobs and hiccups. Angelica couldn’t muster words through her tears, so she just nodded.

“But I’m not dead
. I’m fine. Just another war wound. Nothing to even worry about.” They didn't seem quite as convinced as I hoped, which wasn't surprising since I wasn't OK. I was shot for God's sakes. “Angelica, can you give me and Genesis a moment alone?”

As much as I hated to do it, I needed to talk about what happened with Genesis
. Chris said that the cops came around after the shooting, but that J handled them. No reports were filed as far as I knew.

“Pull a chair over and sit down.”  When Genesis was sitting next to me, I leaned in and whispered, “
First of all, who the hell is in the corner?”

Genesis was still nursing her tears, but that got her to crack a smile
. “That’s Fernie’s mom. She’s praying for you. She’s been here since she found out what happened. No one's made her leave.”

“Why is she praying so much
? Wouldn’t one Hail Mary or something be enough?”

She gave me a wide grin. “Elle, this is how we Mexicans do it
. She’s not leaving until you do. You saved her son and she’ll never forget that. She’s praying for you to heal. That's what mothers do.”

“But I am healed
. Or I will be. Why does she keep praying?”

“Elle, you don’t get it
. You saved her son.” I guess I didn’t get it. I mean, I got it, but her constant prayer seemed a little excessive. Whatever. That wasn't what I really needed to talk to Genesis about.

“Listen, girl
. We gotta talk about that night. Who knows what happened?”

“I haven’t told anyone.”

“No one?”

“No,” she said wide eyed. “Fernie told me not to talk when the cops took him away. I got a ride home and my parents don’t even know I was with him that night
. No one knows everything except us that were there.”

“Wait
. I thought the cops didn’t take a report. How did they get Fernie?”

“Well, your boyfriend got them to ignore the shooting, but they got Fernie and his friend for all the drugs they had at the house.”

Fuck. My throat was to starting hurt. “Can you get me some water?” I wanted to chug the water she came back with, but the doctor said to sip slowly, that I didn’t want to put too much, too fast into my stomach.

“Well, where'
s Fernie now? If he’s locked up, I can get bail posted for him.” If Fernie’s ass was locked up, Chris would be paying J a visit. The least that mother fucker could do for me was bail out Fernie.

Genesis burst into tears again
. “He can’t be bailed. They’re sending him back.”

“What? Back where?”

“Mexico.” She saw my confused look and leaned in to me. “Elle,” she whispered, “We’re not legal here.”

“How did you get here
? To the States I mean?”

“I don’t remember
. My parents crossed when I was young. Fernie came when he was ten.”  She paused, her voice changed, and she became defensive. “We didn’t have a choice. Our parents brought us.” 

“I’m sorry, girl. I had no idea. You know I don’t care.” I didn’t understand what she was saying as I was still feeling the morphine, but there were other things I felt needed to be said instead of digging into Genesis’ citizenship. “Well, I guess I don’t have to tell you that we need to keep all this on the down low. I know people are going to suspect things, and probably gossip, but you have to keep quiet. I don’t want to involve the cops in my life. I don’t mind them, but I feel better when they aren’t around.”

“Ain’t that the truth,” Chris said, strolling in the door
. “Hey girl. You doing OK?” she asked Genesis.

The two hugged
, which seemed odd since they didn't know each other prior to that night at the drug house. I guess traumatic events had a way of making people bond, and bond quickly.

“Yeah, thanks for letting me come here
. I’m gonna go.” She let go of Chris and leaned in to hug me. It was more a patting of the shoulder, as a hug was not an option for my stitched up stomach. “I’ll talk to you later, Elle?”

“Yeah. I’ll be back at
the Center when I get out. Just—don’t tell Penny. OK? I like coming there and I don’t want Penny to make me leave.”

“OK
. I haven’t said anything to her. She’s asked, but I said I didn’t know anything.” I thanked her as she left. What a fucked up situation, all of it. From the drugs, to the shooting, to Fernie being arrested, and all the way to finding out
my
kids were afraid of getting caught without papers.

“Fuck,
Chris.”

“I know, girl
. I know.” 

“I’m gonna sleep. Who else is trynna come up here?”

“Some guys from your work.”

“Has J come back?” I asked with a little too much hope in my voice.

“No.” Chris said this like I was insane for asking.  Maybe I was, I mean, I hated him. Who shoots their girlfriend, the woman they love? If he loved me, wouldn’t he have come around to check on me? Fuck, I shouldn’t care. He was a bastard, and I needed to erase him from my life. Right? Fuck, that seemed easier said than done.

I wanted to talk about this with Chris, all of the jumbled thoughts in my head and emotions in m heart, but she had made it clear what her stance on J was. I’m sure she planned his murder in her head a variety of times. Though Chris was with me in body, I was alone in my head. I pushed it all to the side and pretended everything was OK.
Fake it ‘til you make it
, Marlo once told me in one of his
Life Lessons from Gary, Indiana
. I was going to give it a shot.

“Well, let me catch a cat nap and we’ll go round
two. Thanks for playing gate keeper. I can’t handle ‘em all at once. And what’s up with ole girl?” I asked, nodding towards Fernie’s mom.

“She’s cool
. Doesn’t speak or understand English. Genesis said just to leave her be, so I did.” 

“Whatever
. You can go home,” I told her, pressing the morphine button. My side was hurting something awful. “I’ll call you when I wake up.”

“Sure,” I heard
Chris say, as she sat down in the chair Genesis vacated, and began flipping through a magazine. I was about to fight with her to go home, but the morphine kicked in and I drifted off.

******

“What the fuck happened to your face, Larry?” He was standing next to my bed sporting a black eye and a busted lip.

“Ran into a wall.”

“Fuckin' A, Larry. What happened to your damned face?”

Larry started to pace and run his hands through his hair. It had gotten longer and was standing up every which wa
y, as if his hands had been a permanent fixture in his hair as of late.

“Fine. I went to pay that guy of yours a visit. It didn’t go so well,” he trailed off.

“Oh, Larry. Of course not. Fucker’s built like a brick wall. Did you really think you stood a chance?” I said this with concern in my voice, because although noble, what he did was rather stupid.

“Well fuck, Elle.” He threw his hands in the air. “Did you think I was just going to sit back and do nothing after you get shot? You got fucking SHOT!” He yelled the last point.

“Whoa, cowboy. Bring it down a notch,” Chris chimed in, looking up from a magazine she was reading in a chair across the room.

“Larry, I’m going to be fine. I’ll be out of here before you know it, and back in the kitchen smelling like
French fries and grill char. Now, sit down and tell me all the gossip I’ve missed.”

Larry sat down in the chair next to me and took my hand. He dove into catching me up on anything I’d missed at the restaurant, as well as everyone’s reaction to me being shot. I was probably the hottest gossip there right now. If there was an Applebee’s newsletter, I’d definitely made front page with this. Larry did nothing more than hold my hand, and
I let him do so for his own sake. He didn’t take it any further, and I had a feeling he just wanted to be close to me. Not that I really wanted him close, but it didn’t feel terrible having someone care.

We were just wrapping it up when my parents walked in. Great. I looked at Chris and mouthed
what the fuck
. She shrugged her shoulders and mouthed
I didn’t know
. Well, might as well pull the Band-Aid off in one swift move.

“Mom. Dad. How are you guys?” Lame? Maybe? But really
, what was I going to tell them? I hadn’t exactly planned a plausible story, and the truth wasn’t an option.

“Oh my
God, Earl. Look at her. What have you done, Elle?”

“I was just in the wrong place at the wrong time, Mom. Nothing major. Just a graze. I’ll be out in no time.”

She came over to me and held my hand a little too tight, but I didn’t want her to know how much pain I was in. My dad came on the other side of me and kissed me on the forehead, an unprecedented show of affection for him. “Glad you’re OK,” he mumbled.

Mom’s compassion, if there was any, wore off quick. “How are you going to pay for this? Hospital stays aren’t cheap, and I know you don’t have any insurance th
rough that awful cooking job of yours. You don’t plan to use the $500 we gave you on medical bills, do you? That was for books.”

I wanted to scream at her that I used that money on books
last
semester. How the hell was I going to use it for medical bills
now
? I laid my glasses on the little rolly cart tray, and rubbed at my eyes and forehead. I hadn’t thought about money yet, since I was a little preoccupied—what  with recovering from a fucking gun shot wound. Damn, they drove me crazy and I didn't have the energy for this shit.