“So, what does that mean? Are we back together again officially?” She said, dying to see how he would reply.
“If you say so.” He shrugged, unsure of what he was getting himself into.
“Seriously, State.” She lightly pushed his arm.
“I mean, I don’t know. I guess.”
“
I guess
is not good enough. I need to know that this time it’s gonna be different.”
“I already told you I’m on some other shit. I wanna be wit’ you; that is, if you’ll have me.” He pulled her into him.
Dylan couldn’t even utter the words she felt because on the inside, she felt like she was repeating the same fucked-up cycle of settling for a man she knew wasn’t the one, just so she could say she had somebody. Dylan just prayed that this time would be the time they finally got it right and he’d love her like she’d wanted him to all these years.
For a while they walked in silence, hand in hand, stewing in their own thoughts.
If he could, State would give Dylan the world and everything it had to offer. She was a special woman with a gentle spirit. He felt good when he was around her. She fed his ego, but visions of Ashton’s face haunted his conscience. If she found out what was going on, she was sure to leave him for good.
He shook off the thought and asked, “Anything else on your mind?”
“Yeah.” Dylan met her eyes with his. She desperately wanted to tell him that she was afraid he would never love her, and that if given the chance, he’d discard her heart like before, but instead of going into detail, she only said, “I guess I’m just scared that I’ll end up on the losing end of the stick again.”
“That ain’t gon’ happen. You got all of me this time.” State felt like an absolute dick as the words slipped from his mouth and landed on Dylan’s heart.
“So, tell me.” She hugged him tight. “While we were apart, did you miss me?”
“Let’s just say I listened to a hell of a lot of Raheem Devaughn.”
The Pepper Lounge was a hidden jewel located in the heart of downtown St. Louis. It was a two-story brick venue with thirty-foot oak ceilings and a massive speakeasy-style bar. That night, it was filled to the brim with people kickin’ it. Dylan loved the chaotic atmosphere. To her left were a group of women table dancing, and to her right was a guy joyfully accepting a body shot offer from a tall, long-legged blonde bombshell.
Normally, when she wasn’t attending an industry event, Dylan and her girls would hit up a hip-hop and R&B club, but this time she wanted to do something different. Dylan wanted to hear some fist-pumping, sweat-your-tracks-out kind of music. She and Tee-Tee were on the dance floor, jumping up and down, dancing like giddy school girls to FeFe Dobson’s energetic pop punk hit, “I Want You.”
Dylan’s inner rock goddess was on full display, even down to her outfit. She sported a totally cute black lace and leather sleeveless jacket with a flower brooch, a sleeveless net shirt, black bra, fitted pants, six-inch black heels, and fingerless gloves.
Billie stood back with a disgusted expression on her face while keeping an eye on everyone’s purses. There was no way in hell she was about to act a monkey, and on top of that risk ruining her Guillaume Hinfray chain link pumps. Billie was too old, in her mind, and too prominent a figure to let loose and leave all of her inhibitions behind. Plus, the people at the lounge weren’t her type of people. There were way too many skanks and losers in the crowd for her taste.
“Um, excuse me.” She signaled the bartender. “Can I have a glass of Moët please?”
“Sure.” The cute bartender, who looked like Robin Thicke, smiled as he poured her a glass. “Here you go.” He handed her the drink.
“Thanks.” Billie gave him a twenty-dollar bill. “Keep the change.”
Before taking a sip, Billie grabbed a napkin and wiped the rim of her glass.
“You know you need to stop.” Dylan placed her hand on her hip and shot Billie a look.
“What?” She shrugged.
“Don’t act like you ain’t having fun. I saw you over here bobbing your head to The Ting Tings.”
“Why you make up these stories is beyond me.” Billie smirked, turning her head.
“Bitch, I see you smiling.” Dylan laughed, making Billie face her.
“Whateva, and by the way, do you have a vibrator or something up in your purse? ’Cause it’s been buzzing the entire time we’ve been here.”
“Hell no. I must have a message.” Dylan unzipped her purse and pulled out her cell phone.
In her inbox was a text message from State. It read:
From: State
Where da fuck u @?
Fri, Feb 27 11:03PM
All Dylan could do was giggle and reply back.
To: State
Out
Sat, Feb 27 12:22AM
Seconds later, he sent her another message that said:
From: State
Don’t make me come fuck u up.
Sat, Feb 27 12:22AM
Wanting to mess with him even more, Dylan responded:
To: State
Picture that
Sat, Feb 27 12:23AM
“Who in the world are you textin’ wit’ a big-ass goofy grin on your face?” Billie leaned over and tried to look at her phone.
“This guy I met,” Dylan lied, snatching the phone away from her view.
“Really?” Billie said suspiciously. “I thought you weren’t seeing anybody new.”
“Damn, Inspector Gadget, we just met.” She lied again, feeling horrible. Dylan had never lied to Billie, but she was somewhat embarrassed to admit that she was seeing State again.
“Well, when were you going to tell us about him?”
“When it was serious, Miss All-Up-In-My-Damn-Business.”
“Heffa, please,” Billie scrunched up her face. “I don’t care who you date, as long as it’s not State’s lousy ass. Excuse me,” she yelled, flagging down the bartender once again. “Can I have three more glasses of Moët?”
“Coming right up.” He winked.
Is this cutie flirting with me?
Billie thought, but quickly pushed the idea out of her mind because he was white.
“What is that supposed to mean?” Dylan asked as she received another message.
But before Billie could answer, Tee-Tee rushed over, visibly lit.
“I heard something about State. Is he here?” He scanned the club.
“No. I was just telling Miss Thang here that I don’t care who she dates, as long as it’s not State. And what I mean by that”—she turned her attention back to Dylan—“is that Lord knows we don’t wanna go through that fiasco again.”
“What fiasco?”
“Come on, Dylan,” she said. “We know you’re supposed to be over him, but let’s not forget how you cried and stressed over him constantly because he wouldn’t commit to you. And shit, that muthafucka used to play you left and right.”
“Well, all of that is in the past.” Dylan swallowed her friend’s harsh words.
“She is right,” Tee-Tee jumped in. “Homeboy did string you along; but, honey, I blame you. You’re just too sweet. You’ve got a heart as big as your feet,” he teased.
“Fuck you.” Dylan laughed a bit.
“But none of that matters,” Billie said. “You’ve moved on and you’re happy, right?”
“Yep.” Dylan halfway told the truth.
“Well, let’s have a toast.” Billie handed Dylan and Tee-Tee their drinks. “To happiness.” Billie raised her glass.
“To happiness.” Dylan and Tee-Tee clinked glasses with her as the DJ began to spin The Black Eyed Peas hit, “I Gotta Feeling.”
“Awwwwwww shit,” Tee-Tee shrilled, gulping down his drink. “Meet me on the dance floor!” he told Dylan.
“Hold up, el drunko, I’m coming,” Billie announced.
“I thought yo’ old frigid ass didn’t want to dance.”
“Ah, fuck it. You only live once.” Billie downed her drink as well.
Dylan watched intently as her friends walked out onto the dance floor to do their thing. She was pleased that Billie was finally coming out of her shell, but her continuous disapproval of State was wearing thin. Billie was making it harder and harder for Dylan to come clean about her renewed relationship with him. Yes, he’d led her on and done some fucked up things in the past, but people can change, right? All Dylan could do at this point was trust in his word and pray that this time around he would prove not only her, but her friends wrong.
Remembering the unopened text message she had waiting, Dylan checked her phone.
From: State
U miss me?
Sat, Feb 27 12:25AM
To: State
Of course
Sat, Feb 27 12:40AM
From: State
What u doing later?
Sat, Feb 27 12:41AM
To: State
U
Sat, Feb 27 12:41AM
“This time I want it all.”
—John Legend, “This Time”
Chapter 4
An hour later, Dylan, Billie, and Tee-Tee exited the club buzzed off champagne and Nuvo. A slight drizzle of rain was falling from the sky.
“Oh my God, my feet are hurting so bad,” Billie complained.
“You ain’t said nothin’ but a word.” Tee-Tee dug inside his over-sized purse and pulled out a pair of flats and a pair of tennis shoes. “Which one you want, girl? Take your pick,” he proudly offered.
“Tee-Tee, what are you doing carrying around shoes in your purse?”
“Girl, a bitch like me is always prepared. You never know when it’s about to be a Code Ten, Man Down sitchiation.”
“Yo’ ass always wanna fight somebody.” Dylan laughed. “One day somebody gon’ whoop yo’ ass.”
“Screw you, Satan. I’ll be damn if a bitch run up on me,” Tee-Tee shot back.
“I swear to God yo’ ass is crazy.”
“Do you want me to take you home or not, hater?” he asked.
“Nah, I’m good. I’m just gonna catch a cab.”
“You sure?”
“Yeah,” Dylan assured. “Go ahead. I’ll be fine.”
“I don’t know why you think you so slick.” Billie chuckled, shaking her head. “We all know you’re going to get you some from this mystery man of yours.”
“I love that you know me so well.” Dylan placed her hand on her chest and cheesed.
“Well, just do me a favor and have a orgasm for me, ’cause Lord knows I ain’t had a piece of dick since 1864.”
“You are a fuckin’ idiot.” Dylan giggled, giving her and Tee-Tee hugs good-bye.
“Call me tomorrow,” he said.
“I will. As a matter of fact, let’s have a late lunch.”
“Sounds like a plan.”
Once Billie and Tee-Tee retrieved their cars from the valet and left, Dylan stood along the sidewalk and flagged down a cab. After letting the driver know where she was heading, she sat quietly gazing out of the backseat window. The world was still. All she could hear was the sound of water from the pavement splashing against the tires. For the first time, she realized just how bright the lights from the city skyline were. She wondered if State was watching the sky too.
“How
you
doing?” Tee-Tee did his best Wendy Williams impression into his phone as he drove along the highway heading home.
“Eww, you sound so stank,” Billie replied. “Like you got a mouthful of nuts—and I ain’t talkin’ about no Planters, either.”
“Honey, I had nuts for dinner last night. But anyway, what you doing?”
“Driving.” She chuckled.
“Tonight was fun.”
“It was.” Billie yawned. “But I’m tired as hell. I gotta get up early, though. The twins are having a bake sale at school and I’m participating.”
“Go ’head on, Mommie Dearest,” Tee-Tee teased. “Do yo’ thang.”
“You got the wrong mama. Now, yo’ auntie, on the other hand, is a whole ’nother story.”
“Right. Did Dylan tell you she was coming to stay with her for a while?”
“Yeah, she did.”
“Girl, as soon she gets here, I’m coming over. Hell, I might spend the night too.”
“You and Candy together are a mess.”
“That’s my girl. But speaking of Miss Dylan, I think she and State are back to messing around.”
“Nuh-uh. Dylan ain’t that stupid.” Billie quickly dismissed the idea.
“We both know she’s not dumb, but when has Dylan ever been so secretive about dating somebody? Normally, as soon as she meets a dude, she got us on three-way making wedding arrangements.”
“I feel you, but after how he never got her ring and made her have the abortion, I don’t think she would be silly enough to go back to him.”
“I don’t know. I smell a little Ahi tuna. Something’s fishy.” Tee-Tee tooted up his lips. “Well, look, I’m pulling up to my house, and Bernard is here.”
“I thought y’all were broke up.”
“We were, but one night I let ’im come over and put that thang down on me, and it’s been curtains ever since.”
“You are such a whore.”
“Aaaaaaaaaw! I don’t know about you, but I’m about to get drunk, get naked, and be somebody. Talk to you later, girl. Smooches!”
State lay flat on his back with his hands behind his head, listening to XM Radio’s Heart & Soul station. The warm air circulating through the vent next to his bed quietly kissed his bare chest. It had been a long, tiring day filled with contract negotiations, artist development, and artist showcases, but sleep still evaded him. State loved what he did for a living, but being the hottest CEO in the music game came with a lot of pitfalls. Success, to him, was like suicide, because once you succeeded, you had to prepare to be crucified. Every other day, he was being hit with lawsuits, rumors, jealousy, and betrayal. Niggahs faked loyalty and friendship just to be in his inner circle, while women forgot love and commitment just to spend one night in bed with him. The same people who built him up found it their mission to bring him down. Niggahs that had been around from the beginning swore that he’d changed, but to State, who worked as hard as he did to stay the same?
Sure, his life was crazy, but State wouldn’t trade it for the world. With the negativity came the positive, and State couldn’t ignore the fact that right now, he was winning more than ever. He was number one on Forbes magazine’s Hip-Hop Cash Kings list, racking in an estimated $47 million in 2009, bring his estimated net worth to $350 million dollars. State had it all. He had the hottest chick in the game wearing his chain, a successful and lucrative career in the entertainment industry, and a mistress on the side. Hell, what more could a thirty-three-year-old man ask for?
He had the best of both worlds. Ashton was his angel, his heart. When he was with her, he felt high. He wanted to be good for her. He wanted to be the man she deserved. The love she provided was something money couldn’t buy, but somehow Dylan never strayed far from his mind. Like Ryan Leslie, he was addicted. He loved having her around. With Dylan, he was guaranteed a good time. All she wanted was his time and attention, and State was more than happy to give it. Plus, the sex was phenomenal. She was like a Dell computer: she lived in his lap. He yearned to hear the erotic moans of pleasure she screamed into the air.
The sound of his cell phone ringing interrupted his thoughts. Assuming it was Dylan, State picked up his phone expecting to see her name on the screen. To his surprise, Ashton’s appeared.
“Hello?” He answered groggily, pretending to be asleep.
“I’m sorry, baby. I didn’t mean to wake you. Were you asleep?”
“Yeah, but it’s cool. What you up to?”
“I just got out the shower. The show was great tonight. The concert was sold out. Tomorrow we’ll be on our way to Dublin,” Ashton said excitedly. She was still high from her performance.
“You tired?” State asked.
“Yeah, but I gotta hit the gym. I can’t wait to see you, though. I miss waking up to your big ol’ face,” she teased.
“I miss waking up to that fat ol’ ass.” State laughed.
“Shut up.” Ashton giggled.
There was a loud knock on State’s door.
“Who the hell is that at the door this time of the morning?” Ashton’s attitude quickly changed.
State made up a lie real quick, knowing good and well it was Dylan at the door. “Calm down. Before I fell asleep I called downstairs to the concierge and told them to send the maintenance man up. The sink in our bathroom has a drip that’s been annoying the hell outta me.”
“Don’t be on no bullshit, State, ’cause I swear to God I will get on a plane and come home in a hot second and kick everybody’s ass.”
“Go ’head wit’ all that. Ain’t shit going on but you. Go ’head and go to the gym. I’ma just holla at you later on.”
“Okay,” Ashton replied, hesitant to get off the phone. “I love you.”
“I love you too,” State said back then hung up.
He hated to do her like that. Lying to his wife was something he never really liked to do, but there was no way Ashton could know the truth.
State placed his feet on the Venantino marble floor and made his way down the steps. The last thing he was expecting to find when he opened it was Dylan with her coat unbuttoned, dressed in nothing but her lace panties and bra.
“You like?” She smiled seductively.
“Hell, yeah.” He licked his lips. “But where the fuck are all your clothes?”
“I took them off on the way here.”
“You wild as a muthafucka.”
“Why you standing all the way over there? Don’t be scared. Come closer.” She reached for his hand and pulled him toward her.
State happily wrapped his arms around her and held her tight.
“You never saw me like this before, huh?” She whispered softly into his ear. She placed her hand on his growing manhood and massaged him.
“Bring yo’ ass here.” He pulled her into the house and kicked the door shut.
With her backside facing him, Dylan seductively peeled off her coat. Very tipsy, she placed her hands on her hips and began to saunter slowly toward his bedroom when she lost her balance, and her right heel collapsed over, causing her to stumble. Quick on her feet, Dylan caught herself and stood up straight.
“You okay?” State tried his best not laugh, but he couldn’t help it.
“Pretend you didn’t see that.”
“I didn’t.” He enveloped her in his arms and kissed the nape of her neck.
Dylan drowned in his touch. Inside his bedroom, under the watchful eye of the moonlight, Dylan’s back met with the sheets. Seconds later, she was fully naked. Maxwell’s “Bad Habit” played as he removed his boxers.
With her legs pushed back, Dylan’s pink clit stared him in the face, begging him to come forth. State couldn’t deny it; she had the prettiest pussy he’d ever seen. The fact that it smelled like fresh strawberries enticed him even more.
Feenin’ for him to taste it, Dylan parted her lips for him. With expert precision, he licked the center of her slit, causing her to shake and moan. State’s head game was lethal and should’ve been illegal. Dylan’s juices were flowing in a matter of seconds.
“Damn, you taste good,” he whispered into the lips of her pussy.
“Ooooooooooooh, baby, don’t stop,” she whimpered.
“You like that?”
“Yes!” She squealed as he flicked his tongue across her clit even faster. “Ooooooh, yeesssss. Don’t stop, baby. Don’t stop.”
The faster he licked, the more Dylan lost her mind. While sucking on her clit, State took two of his fingers and placed them inside her warm honey pot. The one-two punch of his tongue and fingers caused Dylan to go into service overload.
“Oooh shit, I’m cumming! Oooh, baby, I’m cumming.” She bounced up and down, cumming all over his mouth and chin.
State loved it. Licking his lips, he wiped his mouth and made his way back up.
“Don’t ever make me wait this long for some pussy. I’ve been thinkin’ about this shit all day,” he confessed, ramming his dick inside her warm, wet slit and hitting bottom.
As soon as he entered her, Dylan’s thighs began to shake. All ten inches of his thick, luscious dick filled her insides. She barely had enough to room to breathe.
With her legs held in the crook of his arms, State squeezed his eyes shut and groaned. Dylan’s pussy was the best. It was fat and always dripping wet, just how he liked it. That night, she was so wet that it was hard for him to keep his dick from slipping out.
“Oooooh . . . baby . . . fuck me! Fuck me!” Dylan continued to beg while rotating her fingers across her clit.
“Cum for me, baby! I want to see you cum!” State ordered, pinching and massaging her nipples.