Material Girl (10 page)
Authors: Keisha Ervin
Maybe it was all the time he spent on the road that tore them apart, or the fact that she drowned herself in numerous charities and committees to forget the fact that Cain hadn’t touched her or said he loved her in years. Or maybe it was the fact that Billie didn’t know when to pick and choose her battles. Everything Cain did was always a problem. She never made him feel like anything he did was right or good enough. But then again, she nagged and complained so much because he wasn’t meeting her needs. At times she hated him for the tears he put on her face, but at the end of the day, he lived inside her heart and in the eyes of their children.
Oh, the children,
she thought. Billie had no idea how she would break the news to them. The mere thought of it caused her to break down and cry even harder. As a mountain of pain escaped through Billie’s eyes, her bedroom door slowly creaked open.
she thought. Billie had no idea how she would break the news to them. The mere thought of it caused her to break down and cry even harder. As a mountain of pain escaped through Billie’s eyes, her bedroom door slowly creaked open.
“I thought I told y’all not to come in here,” she yelled, thinking it was one of the kids.
“Calm down, Lucifer. It’s me, Tee-Tee.” He walked in carrying a tray of food.
For the past week, Billie had been telling everyone she was sick with the flu so she wouldn’t have to face anyone. To her, facing the public was like admitting defeat.
“Why the hell you got it so dark in here? Bitch, you ain’t a vampire, and this for damn sure ain’t
Twilight.
” Tee-Tee placed the tray down and walked over to the curtains, pulling them back. A beam of sunshine lit up the entire room.
Twilight.
” Tee-Tee placed the tray down and walked over to the curtains, pulling them back. A beam of sunshine lit up the entire room.
“Tee-Tee, if you don’t close my blinds in ten point two seconds, I’ma jump out of this bed and punch you in the throat,” Billie warned.
“I dare you. As a matter of fact I double dog dare you. I want you to jump. Y’all hoes gon’ quit fuckin’ wit’ me. I see now I’ma have to show you better than I can tell you.” He snatched the covers off of Billie. “Get yo’ ass up! These kids done called
Nanny 911
on yo’ ass, and now I’m here, so we about to get shit moving.” He snapped his fingers. “And don’t try to say you’re sick again, ’cause Kenzie’s grown ass already told me you been fakin’ the funk. Had me thinkin’ you over here wit’ the swine flu. I done made you homemade soup for nothing. Well, actually, it’s Campbell’s, but you get the point. Get up!”
Nanny 911
on yo’ ass, and now I’m here, so we about to get shit moving.” He snapped his fingers. “And don’t try to say you’re sick again, ’cause Kenzie’s grown ass already told me you been fakin’ the funk. Had me thinkin’ you over here wit’ the swine flu. I done made you homemade soup for nothing. Well, actually, it’s Campbell’s, but you get the point. Get up!”
“Uh-uh, Tee-Tee. Stop. Not now.” Billie turned over and pulled the covers back up.
“What the hell you mean, ‘uh-uh?’” He placed his hands on his hips. “The twins’ birthday party is a week and a half away, and we gotta go meet with this caterer today at twelve, so what do you want to wear?” He walked to the other side of the room and began to ransack Billie’s walk-in closet. “Oh, what about this laROK high-waisted jumpsuit with the back out?” Tee-Tee held up the outfit and spun around on his heels, excited.
When he turned around and noticed Billie’s swollen eyes for the first time and the thousands of tears that had rolled down her face and dried, his heart instantly sunk to his feet.
“Honey, what’s wrong?” He ran over to the bed and sat on the edge. “What happened?”
“Cain.” Billie sobbed uncontrollably.
“Cain what?”
“He wants a divorce.” Billie’s chest heaved up and down as she continued to cry.
“When you find this out?” Tee-Tee was surprised.
“Last Saturday.”
“What the hell? Why you ain’t call and say nothing?” He caringly rubbed her forehead.
“’Cause I’m not talkin’ to Dylan’s funky ass, and I ain’t wanna bother you. I know you over there shacked up wit’ yo’ boo.”
“Girl, please. Fuck Bernard. He ain’t nobody. You my girl. Remember, hoes before bros,” he joked.
“You stupid.” Billie laughed for the first time in a week.
“So, you didn’t see this coming?”
“Yeah . . . no . . . I don’t know.” She threw up her hands. “I guess I always figured we would work it out somehow. I mean, we cuss and fight each other all the time, but after a while I figured, hell . . . that’s how we love. I ain’t never think his ass would buck and leave me, especially not for no white girl. But then time just went on and we stopped making love, and he stopped coming home, and the fighting persisted.” She rocked back and forth. “Then I found out he started dating some chick from
Rock of Love
, and Lord knows I couldn’t mentally deal with that. So, I made myself believe that as long as he continued to put me in front of that bitch and take care of me and the kids, everything was okay. And besides, I was raised that once you’re married, that’s it. You don’t get divorced, no matter what.”
Rock of Love
, and Lord knows I couldn’t mentally deal with that. So, I made myself believe that as long as he continued to put me in front of that bitch and take care of me and the kids, everything was okay. And besides, I was raised that once you’re married, that’s it. You don’t get divorced, no matter what.”
“Who told you that lie?” Tee-Tee looked at her funny.
“My mother. When I was about ten, I started noticing that my father didn’t come home on Friday nights, and it was just Fridays, which I found odd. So, of course, me being the nosey person I am, I asked my mother about it, and she said, ‘Oh, your father plays poker with his friends on Fridays, and they play pretty late, so instead of him driving all the way home, he just spends the night there.’ And so me being young and naïve, I was like, ‘Oh, okay.’” Billie shrugged her arms.
“But then a year later, Friday nights started turning into Saturday and Sunday. And I will never forget”—Billie gazed off absently into the distance—“waking up in the middle of the night to my mother hysterically crying into the phone. I wanted to know what was wrong, so I got out of bed and went to her room. She didn’t even know I was outside of her door, but I listened to her beg”—Billie’s lips quivered as tears streamed down her cheeks—“my father to come home and to not do this to her.”
“That’s when I put two and two together and realized that my father was seeing someone else. I stayed up that whole night by my mother’s door, praying that my father would come home and make my mother’s pain go away, but he didn’t. He didn’t come home until that afternoon. And do you know that when he did, my mother had the biggest smile on her face I had ever seen?” Billie looked at Tee-Tee and shook her head. “It was as if the night before hadn’t even happened.
“Years later, I confronted her about it, and she simply said to me, ‘My darling, when you love someone as much as I love your father and you make vows in front of God and everyone you love, you never leave that person, no matter what.’ And I believed her.”
“That’s some deep shit.” Tee-Tee exhaled.
“I thought that no matter what Cain did to me or no matter what we went through, that I was supposed to stay. And look at where that got me.” Billie looked around her room. “Here, lookin’ stupid as hell. I can’t believe I didn’t leave his trifling ass a long time ago.”
“Well, Billie, you can’t dwell on what you should’ve did now. Now is the time for you to move forward. You can’t stop living because of this. You have three bad-ass kids out there that need you. And if that ain’t motivation enough for you to get up, then I don’t know what to tell you,” Tee-Tee joked.
“You gon’ quit talkin’ about my kids.”
“You know I’m tellin’ the truth.” He smiled.
“Whateva.” Billie rolled her eyes. “Where my goddamn soup?”
“Right here.” Tee-Tee got up and set the tray on her lap. “You want me to feed you?”
“If you come anywhere near my mouth, I will stab you.”
“Ugh. Why you gotta be so violent?”
“People like you make me violent,” she teased.
“So, have you told the kids yet?”
“Nope.” Billie took a sip of the soup. “They just think we’re into it again.”
“So, y’all been over here going at it, huh?”
“Every time we’re around each other,” Billie said honestly.
“So, Billie, I always wanted to know.” Tee-Tee eased all the way on the bed and sat Indian style. “Why didn’t you feel comfortable enough to tell me and Dylan what was going on between you and Cain when it was happening? We up here thinkin’ y’all Will and Jada. Like, we didn’t know nothing was going on, then suddenly you hit us wit’ the news y’all was separated. What’s the T, bitch? I thought we were bosom buddies.” He squeezed his implants together.
“We are.” Billie chuckled. “I just didn’t want y’all to look at me different. I’m always the one giving you two advice, but if y’all would’ve known what was going on over here, y’all would’ve been lookin’ at me like I was crazy.”
“You got that right.” Tee-Tee slapped her thigh.
“I just wish this feeling would go away.” Billie ran her hands up her face and began to cry again. “It’s like it’s a hole in my chest.”
“It will eventually. It just takes time.” Tee-Tee wrapped his arms around Billie. “But you have to stop crying. Crying isn’t going to fix the problem.”
Tee-Tee was right. Crying wasn’t going to solve a damn thing and Billie knew it. She was stronger than her tears. And no, this wasn’t love or life. What she and Cain had was reckless, and Billie deserved more. At this point, she just needed to demand more.
“And it kills me to know how much I really love you.”
—Melanie Fiona, “If It Kills Me”
Chapter 10
The smell of sugary treats baking in the oven brought a smile to Dylan’s face for a brief second. She’d been up all morning making homemade cookies in the shape of the Chanel logo for the twins’ birthday party that afternoon. She wasn’t quite sure if she was still invited due to the fact that she and Billie hadn’t talked in more than a week. She’d tried calling her numerous times, but Billie would never pick up the phone. It was obvious that she was still upset with her, but Dylan didn’t think she would cuss her out in front of the kids if she showed up unannounced.
Dylan was determined to do whatever it took to get her friend back. She’d let her down in the worst way by allowing her own selfish needs to come first. If she had been the friend she was supposed to be, she could’ve been there to support Billie in her time of need. Now things were all fucked up. Billie was getting a divorce, and Dylan had lost her best friend and boyfriend all in one afternoon.
Dylan needed the distraction of a bunch of rowdy Bébé’s kids to get her focused and back in order. Sure, she hadn’t shed one tear, but she and State’s impromptu break up in fact hurt her to the core of her soul. They’d talked a couple of times since he’d left, but distance had already begun to put a strain on things. Their conversations were forced and met with continuous silences. After a few minutes, one of them would say they’d call the other back, and that would be that.
Dylan didn’t know what to do. State was the man she longed for. She craved everything about him, the bad and the good, and to love him on top of that did nothing for their time apart or her self-esteem. All she could think about was what was it about her that couldn’t make him commit? Why was it so hard for him to factor her into his life in some kind of way? She did everything a woman in her position could do. She didn’t make him home-cooked meals, but she could bake her ass off, and brought him yummy delicacies all the time. She was never too far from his reach. Whenever he called, she came running. The sex was always on point. The way they contoured their bodies into Cirque de Soleil–like positions, and licked, screamed, and bit one another was wickedly delicious.
Maybe distance will make the heart grow fonder
, Dylan tried to tell herself as she opened the oven door. The tray of cookies that had been baking for twelve minutes was done. Bobbing her head, she placed them on top of the stove and sang along to Ledisi’s get-to-steppin’ anthem, “Turn Me Loose.” Dylan couldn’t sing a lick, but the words to the song resonated deep with her. “
I called you yesterday, but you’re too busy to have a conversation
,” she sang.
, Dylan tried to tell herself as she opened the oven door. The tray of cookies that had been baking for twelve minutes was done. Bobbing her head, she placed them on top of the stove and sang along to Ledisi’s get-to-steppin’ anthem, “Turn Me Loose.” Dylan couldn’t sing a lick, but the words to the song resonated deep with her. “
I called you yesterday, but you’re too busy to have a conversation
,” she sang.
“Oh my God. How long are you going to listen to this depressing-ass shit?” Candy sauntered into the kitchen with her third glass of Jack in hand.
“Until I’m tired of listening to it,” Dylan snapped back.
“Ugh. I don’t know where you got to be so damn sentimental.” Candy sat at the island. “Last time I checked, I ain’t raise no punk. Shit, if the niggah don’t want you no more, then fuck ’im. Shit . . . next! There are plenty more rich, successful, fine—did I mention rich?—men out there. State ain’t the only baller in the sea. You better throw yo’ cast in and hook you a new one.”
“Are you finished?” Dylan stopped and looked at her.
“As a matter of fact, no, I’m not. I need to holla at you about something.”
All Dylan could do was laugh. She already knew that when her mother needed to holla at her, money would somehow be involved.
“I was wondering when this conversation was gonna take place. I have to give it to you. You waiting a month to ask me for something is a record,” she said, cutting out more cookies.
“Watch yo’ mouth, li’l girl,” Candy warned. “Now, I got this business venture that I want you to back me on. See, I know this guy in Bangkok that’s starting this edible dildo company called Eat a Dick. I’m tellin’ you, Chunky, it’s gon’ be huge. All I need is for you to let me borrow fifty grand—”
“Excuse me?” Dylan cut her off. “What did you say? ’Cause I know I didn’t just hear what I thought you said. All those face lifts you’ve had must’ve affected your speech.”
“Listen, now.” Candy tried to get her refocused. “I know you a li’l bit in debt, but if you give me the fifty Gs, I can become a silent partner, right? Then I can pay you back all the other money I owe, and then you can pay off some of yo’ debt. I’m tellin’ you, D, you help me out with this, and we gon’ be large and in charge, big boy!” Candy threw her hands up in the air as if to say “Now what?”
“I’m not giving you fifty thousand dollars to blow on yet another one of your get rich quick schemes. Whatever happened to the thirty thousand I gave you to invest in that placenta skin care line, or that fifteen thousand dollar gambling debt you collected in Atlantic City that I had to pay off? Oh, and let’s not forget the seventy-five thousand you squandered on creating that wack-ass turquoise jewelry collection. I mean, who in the hell wears turquoise?”
“So, let me get this straight. You’re tellin’ me no?”
“And the lady with the silicone boobs wins a cookie!” Dylan threw one at her mother.
Quick on her feet, Candy caught it and took a small bite.
“Let me hit you wit’ something, li’l girl. I don’t need yo’ money. Candy got connections. My name run deep in the streets. Instead of sittin’ up here sounding like a goddamn cat wailing and baking doggie treats, you need to get like me. See . . . I already learned my lesson. After ya daddy, couldn’t no man get in this heart, but you young, dumb, and full of cum. And frankly, you being a li’l bitch right about now.” Candy quoted her favorite line from
Menace II Society.
Menace II Society.
“Who you think you talkin’ to?” Dylan shot, ready to go off.
“You, fire crotch. While you think you know everything, what you need to realize is that love is a magical comfort food for the weak and uneducated. Yeah, it makes you feel all warm and relevant for a while, but in the end, love only leaves you weak . . . dependent . . . and fat.” Candy threw the half-eaten cookie back at Dylan. “Now, take that in ya ass!” she spat before storming off.
After all of what her mother said, all Dylan could think was,
I know this bitch ain’t tryin’ to call me fat
.
I know this bitch ain’t tryin’ to call me fat
.
Over two hundred of Kenzie and Kaylee’s best friends filled the City Museum. The City Museum was an eclectic mixture of a children’s playground, funhouse, surrealistic pavilion, and architectural marvel made out of unique found objects. The attractions consisted of enchanted caves, an aquarium, shoelace factory, and more. Kids were screaming, laughing, and running everywhere. It was barely controlled chaos, but Billie was enjoying every minute of it. Kyrese was off playing with his friends, and by the smiles on her girls’ faces, she knew they, too, were satisfied. They’d eaten way too much cotton candy and had one too many snow cones, but Billie didn’t mind. It was their day.
Although she was keeping a close eye on the kids, Billie was having some adult fun too. All of her family and friends were there, including her industry friends. Big of Big Entertainment records and his wife Unique were there, along with their daughter. Tee-Tee’s other homegirls, Gray and Heidi, came with their kids as well. For some reason, Gray’s uncle in-law Clyde had insisted upon coming too.
Billie didn’t mind his presence, but his whole look was bringing down the ambiance of the party. The man looked a hot-ass mess. It was ninety degrees outside and he wore a rhinestone fedora, a pair of 1996 fake Versace shades, tan crocodile blazer, a crushed velvet button-up, polka dot wide leg slacks, and Stacy Adams. Besides his outfit, there was just something off about him. If he decided to act up, Billie was sure to sic security on him.
“Hey, girl!” Mina Gonzalez spoke. She was Billie’s friend, a fellow member of the PTA, and owner of Mina’s Joint Salon and Spa, where Billie got her hair done.
“Hey!” Billie stretched her arms wide for a hug. “I’m so happy you came. Where is Miss Lelah?”
“Girl, over there playin’ already wit’ my friend Mo and her kids.”
“How’s the hubby?”
“Scrumptious. I swear, it’s been almost fours years, but every day is still like Christmas.”
“That’s what’s up. Well, enjoy yourself. I gotta go see what’s going on with this magician.”
“All right, go ’head,” Mina assured.
Billie walked across the room and dialed the magician’s cell phone number but got no answer. “If this muthafucka don’t get here soon . . .” she said out loud to herself.
“Okay, I need you to calm down, psycho mom. If who don’t get here?” Tee-Tee asked, fixing her hair for the third time.
“Get yo’ goddamn hands out of my hair.” She smacked his hand away. “And I’m talkin’ about the magician. He’s twenty minutes late.”
“Oh, hell no.” Tee-Tee twirled his index finger around in a circle. “I know you ain’t got my babies no damn magician.”
“What’s wrong wit’ a magician?”
“Girl, magicians ain’t nothing but an organized ring of pedophiles.”
“You’re an idiot.” Billie waved off the idea.
“I’m tellin’ you. What you think gon’ appear when he start doing them tricks? Little girls’ panties.”
“I’m done talkin’ to you.” Billie started to walk away only to stop dead in her tracks.
“What’s wrong wit’ you?” Tee-Tee came up and stood beside her.
“What the hell is she doing here?” Billie and Tee-Tee watched as Dylan and Candy entered the building. “I thought I told you to take her ass off the guest list.”
“Stop being like that.” Tee-Tee hit her softly on the arm. “She’s here now. Just hear her out.”
“What up, nephew?” Candy yelled, happy to see him.
“Hey, Auntie.” Tee-Tee hugged her. “What you all dolled up for?”
Candy was scantily clad in a hot pink freak’em girl dress that hung low in the front, displaying her full cleavage, and Cinderella stripper heels.
“I’m meeting the fella here I was tellin’ you about from the Internet.” Candy searched the room for him, but didn’t see him.
“That’s what’s up.” Tee-Tee smacked her on the ass.
“So, if you’ll excuse me, I got to go find my next victim. But before I do, y’all work this shit out.” She pointed her finger back and forth between Billie and Dylan.
“What it do, boo?” Tee-Tee smacked his lips and stared Dylan up and down. “You look hot.”
“Thank you.” She turned to the side and dipped down then stood back up. “Billie, you look cute too. I love that dress.”
Billie didn’t even reply. Instead, she shot her a nasty look.
“Okay, I’m just gonna say it.” Tee-Tee raised up his hands as if someone had told him to freeze. “I sense a little tension between you two. Bam! It’s out there.”
Billie finally spoke up. “Bitch, I don’t like you.”
“C’mon, Billie, stop,” Dylan whined. “Be my friend again. I’ve called you I don’t know how many times, sent you flowers, and look.” She held up the box. “Since you wouldn’t let me do the cake anymore, I made the girls these sugar cookies designed in the shape of the Chanel logo, and even made you your favorite kind of cookie, peanut butter cups.”
Billie still wouldn’t budge.
“And I’m sorry that I wasn’t there when you needed me. That was a fucked up thing to do, and I feel like shit about it. Plus, if it makes you feel any better, State broke up with me.”
Billie stomped her foot on the floor. “I told you he was gon’ drop dat ass! Yes!” She balled up her fist and thrust her hand back. “I love it when I’m right!”
“Well, damn, you ain’t got to be that excited.” Dylan pouted.
“Aw, shut up and give me my goddamn cookies. We got work to do.” She took the box from Dylan’s hand.
“And I thought I was touched,” Tee-Tee said, linking arms with Dylan. “C’mon, let’s go find your mother.”
“Do we have to?” Dylan continued to pout.
“Yes. I wanna see who yo’ new daddy gon’ be.”
To both Tee-Tee’s and Dylan’s dismay, they found Candy talking to none other than Uncle Clyde.
“This is some bullshit,” Dylan said under her breath once she saw what he was wearing.
“Uh-uh, girl,” Tee-Tee disagreed. “This shit here is priceless. Auntie! Introduce us to yo’ friend.”
Candy hadn’t been this upset since Dylan crushed her dreams of being a silent partner in Eat a Dick. Clyde looked nothing like his profile picture on Black Planet. On there, he looked like an older, more distinguished Boris Kodjoe. In person, he resembled a played-out Charlie Wilson. And his outfit, well, he might as well have gotten dressed in the dark.
“Clyde, this is my nephew, Tee-Tee, and my daughter, Dylan.”
“What it do, he/she?” He raised his hand for a handshake.
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