Authors: Miss Ware's Refusal
All three stood back to look at Judith’s image in the mirror. The deep-green brought out the green flecks in her eyes and the milky whiteness of her skin. “Even my freckles look better,” she said, and all of them laughed.
“There is something quite pagan about that dress,” said Barbara, “and it quite suits you.”
“Yes, doesn’t it?” Judith turned slowly to admire it from all angles, and she felt transformed.
“A simple ruby necklace and earrings and no other jewelry,” said Madame Celeste.
Judith laughed. “A garnet pendant from my mother and a small garnet ring is what it will have to be.”
“Hmpph! Yes ... but red it must be.”
“And now, Madame, you have a pelisse that will compliment this, I am sure?”
“Oh, no, Barbara, I have my wool cloak. I can’t take anything else,” Judith protested.
“Nonsense. That cloak will do on a rainy day, but not for an evening out. I insist. The dress is from me, but Robin wanted to give you something too.”
“You are both too kind, and I am quite corrupted by the dress, so I can protest no more,” said Judith.
They found a corduroy cloak in a lighter shade of the green, banded in black velvet. Judith was by now quite light-headed at the prospect of owning such fashionable clothes. She did not notice Barbara whispering to Madame, adding two more dresses to the order, a wine-red kerseymere round gown and a sprigged muslin. Barbara knew her friend well enough to restrain herself from adding more.
She whisked Judith out and they headed for the Bazaar, where Barbara and Judith bought gloves, stockings, and a reticule that seemed made for Judith’s new kerseymere. By that time the ladies were exhausted. They had originally planned to have a cup of tea and pastry out, but decided to return to the Stanleys’, where they could sort out their packages.
Judith arrived home a few hours later, laden with assorted parcels, and could not even open the door. Hannah answered her ring, but was unable to take anything, since she had been baking and her hands were floury. Judith let everything spill out on the sofa and told Hannah about the ball and the shopping. Hannah smiled at the expression on her face. She looked like a child as she rediscovered what was in each bundle.
“Wait until you see the dress! I look quite elegant, and the cloak compliments the dress perfectly. Barbara and Robin were much too generous.”
“Nonsense. They have been wanting to give you something, and they can well afford it. I am sure that you will be a success at this ball.”
“Maybe not the Incomparable of the evening, Hannah, but I am looking forward to it. I have been moping about too long. It will do me good to socialize a little. I’ll have a party or two to remember in my old age.
“I shall be right back to help with dinner.” Judith gathered up her bundles and started up to her room. Once there, she sorted out gloves and stockings and put them away, then stood for a moment looking out her window. The garden was now completely dead. The rosebushes had wrinkled brown hips hanging from them, but all else was sere and bare.
“We must get some Christmas greens,” and the thought of pine boughs reminded her of the dress. “I wish Simon could see me. I felt so different in it. More sure of myself.” She imagined Simon’s hand around her waist and waltzing with him, and her pulse quickened just dreaming of it.
She shook her head as if to clear it of such unrealistic fantasies and turned from the window to go downstairs to the more prosaic tasks of setting the table and making the gravy.
The Duchess of Ross’s ball was one of the last of the Little Season. Some of the ton had already left for their country homes to celebrate the holidays, so there was not a great crush at the door or on the receiving line. Nor would there have been, for her grace was a rarity, more interested in her guests’ comfort than in her own prominence as a hostess. She provided good food, dancing, and a select group, so that one could enjoy a waltz, whist, or a stimulating conversation on the latest Tory scandal.
She had been watching Simon and Diana together and rejoiced to see the duke begin to enjoy himself at larger social gatherings. Diana had made a difference, and tonight Simon was looking infinitely more relaxed. The duchess knew it was most likely a flirtation that she was watching, for she was an observant woman and remembered Robin and Diana on the dance floor just a year ago. That had been more than a flirtation; she was willing to stake her emerald necklace on it.
What had happened, she couldn’t begin to guess. She was an old friend of all concerned and shook her head at the comedy of errors being enacted in front of her: Barbara thinking herself in love with Dev all these years, Devenham convinced of his undying passion for Diana, Diana in love with Robin, and Robin in love with Diana. And Simon? Was Simon in love with anyone, or was he not yet ready? And who would be right for him? I must be on the lookout for someone, thought the duchess as she turned to greet newly arrived guests.
Robin, Barbara, and Judith had arrived early. Judith felt as though she were moving in a dream. She had, as the vicar’s daughter, attended the local assemblies and been to small dances at the squire’s home, but country socializing was nothing compared to this. The jewels and the dresses were dazzling. She watched Barbara be swept away for the first country dance and was quite prepared to hold up the wall, when some young man approached her. At first she was worried she might have forgotten the steps, but she was able to relax after the first few measures and by the end even exchange a few polite words with her partner as they were brought together by the figures of the dance.
After that first dance, Judith noticed that of the steady stream of men who came her way, many were of the military, and when Robin came to claim her for the first waltz, she teased him about sending his subalterns on a rescue mission.
“Rescue, be damned,” he said. “I may have sent one over, but after that I was besieged by all the young lieutenants. They all wanted to know who the goddess in green was. Truly, Judith, you look wonderful, rather like a druidic priestess. You stand out from all the bespangled girls in their whites and pinks and silver and gauze. No wonder you are a success.”
“I must admit it is thrilling, Robin. I am glad the two of you persuaded me, and I can’t thank you enough for your generosity.”
“Nonsense. It was nothing.”
After their dance, Robin offered Judith his arm and took her in for some refreshment. Neither of them, therefore, was present when Simon and Diana arrived. Robin had made his excuses to Simon earlier in the week, saying only that he had promised to escort a friend of Barbara’s, and could not go with him. Simon had a footman come along and lead him through the receiving line, but was able to dismiss him soon afterward when Diana came up and took his arm to lead him to the ballroom.
When Robin and Judith returned, there was Simon, laughing in the middle of a small group of guests, with Lady Diana on his arm. The shock of seeing him quite took Judith’s breath away, and she felt Robin stiffen. Judith was ready to turn and run before Simon could see her, and then she realized once again that his ease of movement made one forget his blindness. She was safe as long as she was not introduced to him, and she knew she could avoid that. She let her breath out in one long sigh, and Robin looked down at her.
“As bad as that, Judith?”
“I fear so, Robin. And you?”
Robin looked surprised, but forsook his usual humorous stance for honesty. “Yes, I find it most painful. Simon is my best friend and I can hardly begrudge him happiness after all he’s been through, but sometimes it is almost too much for me when all three of us are together.”
“She is certainly very beautiful.” Judith could not help noticing the way Diana’s arm was tucked under Simon’s, and the way he turned to her as she spoke, leaning down as though what she had to say was the most interesting observation he had heard in years.
As country dances were struck up, Judith could not help noticing how Diana and Simon took the time to stroll along one side of the room as though they were discussing something intimate. They wandered in to get some punch, and Judith, although she was thirsty again, refused Robin’s offer to lead her in, and sent him in alone. She was standing there, awaiting his return, when her hostess approached her.
“Are you enjoying yourself, my dear?” asked the duchess.
“Yes, yes, indeed. I am very grateful you included me in your invitation.”
“I was happy to. Any friend of Robin and Barbara’s is welcome,” said the duchess in her matter-of-fact way. “You knew Barbara from school?”
“Yes, we attended a seminary in Bath together.”
“And you returned home afterward? Have never been to London before?”
“No, I did not return home. My father died and I was forced to take as post as a governess. But I doubt I would have made my come-out in any case, since my father was only a country vicar, with but distant connections in London.”
The duchess raised her eyebrows in surprise. Judith waited for a set-down or a polite retreat, and was pleasantly surprised when the duchess asked with genuine interest, “And are you on holiday now and visiting the Stanleys?”
“No, I am now in London for good. You see, my brother finished his degree and is studying law. We both had planned to set up house together when he came down from Oxford.”
“And now you are a lady of well-deserved leisure.” The duchess smiled warmly.
“For a short while, your grace. I did have a position for a little while, and am looking for one again, to make a little extra for luxuries like the theater and books. I must be boring you with all these details. And it is hardly polite to speak of job-hunting at a ball,” Judith said, suddenly aware of the humorous side of this encounter, for she had utterly relaxed her guard in the other woman’s genuine interest.
“I admit it is not a common topic, but I find it far more interesting to listen to an obviously intelligent young woman than some of the hen-witted ladies here tonight. I see you have achieved a certain popularity with the military, my dear.”
Judith laughed. “I fear that was all Robin’s doing.”
“Not at all. You are quite lovely in that dress, and something out of the ordinary. I do hope you will come and drink tea with me some afternoon?”
Judith flushed with pleasure and surprise. “Thank you, your grace, for your kindness. If you mean it and are not just being polite, I would enjoy it very much.”
“You are plainspoken almost to a fault, I see.” The duchess laughed and Judith blushed at her own bluntness. “I do mean it. You will receive my card, but now I must spend some time with my other guests, much as I am enjoying our chat.”
Judith was promised for the second waltz to a young subaltern, and as the music began, she noticed that Robin was with Lady Lenox and Barbara actually dancing with Dev. Neither Barbara nor Dev looked particularly happy, however, for one of the couple who had been standing near them was Simon and Diana, and Dev’s last-minute invitation to Barbara had been an instantaneous reaction to the sight of Diana and the duke gliding off together.
Simon was enjoying his waltz, as he always did. By now, he and Diana were expert at making it seem as though he were in charge, whereas, in truth, the gentle pressure of her hand on his back enabled them to avoid catastrophe. “We have been lucky so far, Diana,” he said as they whirled around the room, “but I am almost glad the Little Season is just about over, so I can relax.”
“You can’t fool me, your grace. You enjoy the risk!” On a more serious note she observed that Barbara and the viscount were dancing together. “They do not look particularly happy, I must admit, but now perhaps Dev will seek her out more.”
“She has loved him since she was a little girl. And he has never regarded her with anything but a brotherly affection,” said Simon. “I think it will be a few years before he learns to appreciate her ... if he ever does.”
“Oh, look ... I am sorry, I am always forgetting,” Diana said, terribly embarrassed.
“It is all right, milady, people forget all the time,” said Simon in a teasing tone to lighten the tension. “What did you see?”
“I was just going to point out Lieutenant Graves’ partner. I did not catch her name, but she is a friend of Robin and Barbara.”
“Perhaps if you describe her, I will recognize her. Robin spoke of escorting a friend of his sister’s, and I have met many of Barbara’s friends over the years.”
“She is not beautiful,” replied Diana.
Simon chuckled.
“No, no, that is not a catty comment. She is, in fact, rather plain. Reddish-brown hair, freckles, small and slim. But she is quite striking all the same. She is dressed in an exquisite green velvet gown, which quite sets her apart from the rest of us.”
“No distinguishing features?” asked Simon. “No squint or pug nose that would jog my memory?”
“No.”
“Well, she is probably someone I have never met, or only briefly. Do you wish to be introduced?”
“No, I don’t want to be eclipsed, your grace.”
“The Lady Diana eclipsed! You in your—what did you tell me?—silver-tissue gown, looking like the goddess of the moon herself, no doubt.”
“I wonder what extravagances you would utter could you see me.” Diana laughed. “If I look like the moon, then this woman is of the earth ... there is something pagan about her.”
“And you accuse me of extravagance.”
“No, truly, Simon, there is an air about her of oak groves and standing stones.”
“Well, then, we’d best stay away from her lest she put us under a spell. She might cause us to fall in love.”
“Oh, it would not take a very powerful spell to do that,” Diana said.
The two of them continued in that vein for a while. It was a game they played, knowing there was a slim possibility one of them would end the game and begin to play in earnest, yet also knowing neither of them would. Simon, in fact, was beginning to find it less and less amusing and more frustrating. There was most certainly a current of attraction, and there were times during an evening when he was tempted to pull Diana off into an alcove and give way to the feelings she sometimes aroused in him. Except, of course, he could not see the damned alcoves and could hardly picture himself bribing a footman to lead him to one or asking Diana herself. His sense of the ridiculous lightened his desire to release, with a few passionate kisses, some of the sexual tension between them.