Luster (4 page)

I
kick
the hacky-sack back to Liam, chuckling when for the ten-millionth time he misses it. The kids’ a klutz, not unlike me when I was his age.

“You’re kicking it too hard!” he whines, sticking his bottom lip out. “I can’t do it.”

I just roll my eyes at him, wishing he wouldn’t cave in so easily. If there is one thing that’s different between Liam and I it’s my determination. Once I have my mind set on something there’s no going back. With him? He questions everything, especially himself.

I walk back over to him, trying to demonstrate how to keep his foot out and balance just right so he can catch the hacky-sack with the inner arch of his foot. “Just like this, Li. Just hold your foot out like that. I’ll try to go easy on you kid.”

In comes Samantha with a troubled look on her face that melts away when she catches a glimpse of me and Liam playing together. Sometimes she gets so emotional over stuff like this. Women.

“Nice try!” she calls out to him when he finally catches the damn thing with his foot.

I let out a whoop and run over to clap him on the back. “That’s what I’m talking about! I told you you could do it, buddy.”

He beams up at me, both front teeth missing. I can’t help thinking he might just be the cutest damn kid in the world. Not that I’m biased or anything.

Sam comes up and gives me a brief hug before squatting down and pulling Liam up against her. “I’m proud of you buddy. Looks like your hard work is paying off, right?”

She musses his hair and Liam groans. “Leave my hair alone, jeez. I had it just right.”

I fight the laugh that threatens to come out, choking it back and covering up my mouth with a cough. “You heard the man.”

Sam just rolls her eyes at me and stands back up, swinging her purse back over her shoulder. “I want to talk to you later. Just not right now. When can I call you?”

The tone of her voice sets me on edge, and I can see in her eyes that something’s not quite right. “Yeah, whenever I guess. My night is free.”

She nods at me but when she looks back down at Liam the worry washes away. “Ready to go?”

He folds his arm across his chest and stands his ground. “No. I want to stay here just a little while longer. Please?”

“I’m not sure tonight is a good idea, but if you want to come over sometime maybe in a couple of days that’s cool with me,” I say, winking down at him. Turning to Sam I shrug my shoulders. “You can’t blame the guy for trying.”

He perks up at this and leans in to give me a tight squeeze. “Okay, I guess. Can I bring my hacky-sack?”

“Only if you promise me that you’ll practice some more between now and then,” I reply, pretending to be stern with him. “You know what they say about practice…”

Liam nods, giving me one last hug before Sam directs him back out the door, her voice trailing down and out the driveway.

I don’t exactly know what’s going on with Sam and Liam but I can tell that whatever it is she wants to talk about is not going to be any good. Anxiety starts rising in me but before I get a chance to think any more about it a familiar face peers around the opening to the garage right after I open it.

Falyn comes slowly walking in, her eyes looking a little too innocent. She gives a quick look back at Samantha and Liam while they’re getting into Sam’s car, obviously curious about my family.

I can tell that she wants to ask about them but she refrains, gently setting her purse down on the table beside her. “Hi there.”

She almost looks half disappointed in me and half in awe of me. I mean I get the awe, because frankly I get that look a lot, but the disappointment… I don’t really know what to make of it.

“Howdy. You ready to be a model?”

“I guess now is as best a time as any. Where do you want me?” She asks, peeling her trench-coat off and hanging it over the back of a chair. “What exactly do I need to do?”

Her words send a trill up my spine and back but I ignore it, for once trying to keep it professional. Maybe it’s best if I don’t drag us along like I really want to. She did seem awfully interested in the contract portion of it all. Clearly the girl just wants her money’s worth from me. I guess I should go ahead and give it to her.

But I catch the soft slope of her shoulder as she takes off the cardigan she was wearing, revealing a tank top underneath. And all those thoughts of restraint fly right out the damn window. Me a professional? Forget it.

The purple tank top she’s wearing hugs her everywhere, including the fine rack that I’m getting a better view of this time around. Her cleavage pokes out the top ever so slightly, teasing me.

She must be pretty cold judging by how hard her nipples are peeking through the thin layer of cotton. I suppose I’ll keep that little tidbit to myself though.

“Let’s start with you sitting here,” I answer her finally, pulling one of my metal stools out for her to sit on. “It’ll give me the best view of your legs.”

Falyn just looks at me, her cheeks tinged pink. I guess she just now realized that she actually has to be the one to strip in front of me this time. The thought makes me smile.

“Okay,” she squeaks before settling down on the stool. I give her a pointed look, slowly shaking my head at her.

“Uh-uh. You know what you got to do. Let’s get to it then.”

I love watching how her mouth pops open before she closes it back shut. It gives me just a little extra pleasure knowing that it’s so easy to scandalize her. I can’t even imagine growing up like that, every little thing someone says to you shocking the hell out of you.

I’ve heard it all seen it all, hell, I’ve possibly done it all at this point. Nothing people say or do really surprises me anymore.

Without another word Falyn hops off the stool and walks around the back side of the chair as if to give herself some semblance of privacy. It’s completely pointless of course, but whatever floats her boat I guess.

She slowly folds her jeans and puts them overtop her trench-coat as delicately as possible. Obviously stalling.

“Any day now, babe.”

She doesn’t take the bait though and walks back over to stand in front of me, equipped in just her underwear and tank top and bra underneath.

It’s a damn good thing I’ve got a thick pair of jeans on myself, now that I’m sporting half a boner. Her legs are insane, out of this world even. I can’t believe she’s gone through life so far and no one’s told her this. But when you’re shaped like a goddess and cover up like a politician I guess it isn’t really a surprise after all.

I lick my lips and pat the stool again, waiting for her to take a seat. “I’m gonna go grab my sketchpad real quick.”

Truth be told I have one lying not too far from me, but I need the extra few steps away from Falyn to calm my nerves. I’m not usually nervous about drawing another person, even one as beautiful and as close as she is. It could be because I know this is really just a business deal in the end. Even though that should probably make it a little easier on me…

And as much as I like toying with her, I really do need the money. So I guess I shouldn’t fuck this one up then.

I grab the other sketchpad I use sometimes from my cluttered desk, reaching into the drawer for my set of graphite pencils. I was considering doing her in charcoal but remembered the way she looked at my pencil drawings last time. I could tell they really spoke to her, and maybe I wouldn’t mind if she truly liked this drawing of hers just the same.

Cool it, Matt. It shouldn’t matter whether she likes your work or not. She’s not paying you to wow her. She’s paying you for your sculptures.

I take in a deep breath and walk back over to her, pulling out my own chair to sit in. Looking up at her face one last time I give her a small smile before my hand takes over, and I began sketching the long lines of her legs.

S
omething
about his smile calms me down a bit, making me feel a little less crazy inside. Which is crazy in and of itself.

I watch as Matt’s hand gracefully goes back and forth sketching the outline of my legs. The sheer concentration on his face alone makes me feel exhausted for him.

I let my mind wander to when I first stopped in earlier. The woman and boy that were here… who were they?

I’m assuming of course that it’s Matt’s son and his son’s mother especially given the way he was playing around with the kid. They seemed very close, like a dad and his son. I’m not so sure about the woman, and wish I could ask him what the deal is. I don’t want to be too nosy though.

I clear my throat. Maybe I’ll just ask him about the woman and boy, anyway. Just for conversation. “So… why don’t you tell me a little bit about yourself?”

Well at least in an around-about way, that is.

Matt doesn’t bother looking up from his drawing and focuses more attention to the shading he’s doing along my calf. “What do you want to know?”

I figure it would be obvious but I guess not. “Do you live alone? Do you have a family? That sort of thing.”

He pauses for a moment, glancing up at me from under his thick lashes. It’s odd but even in this dim lighting his eyes are startlingly green. I have to pull myself back out from getting lost in them.

“Yeah, I live by myself. And yes, I even have a family.”

And he sets back to work, blissfully unaware of the way I grit my teeth together at his short answers. The man just can’t give me what I want, can he?

“I see. Well in that case, so do I. I have a family too.”

I don’t know where the hell that came from, but I realize how ridiculous I sound as soon as I say it. I know he heard me but he pretends that he didn’t, further frustrating me.

It’s one thing to be intense in his concentration, it’s quite another to flat out ignore me.

“So the woman and young boy that were just here… are you related to them?”

I feel the vibration of his deep laugh more so than hear it, and Matt finally lifts his head up to give me a good look. “Yes. Any more questions?”

My mouth curves downward into a frown. He’s evading me and he totally knows it too!

I go to ask another question when he grabs a firm hold of his seat and pulls it up to scoot closer towards me. He does it one more time until his knees are bumping up against mine. I swallow hard, struggling to try to take another breath as he pulls on a lever and lowers himself closer to the floor.

Now his eyes are level with my crotch. Freaking awesome.

I’m wearing a very modest pair of black cotton underwear, but I feel like he can see right through them. I can’t really tell if he’s actually looking at me there or if he’s doing what he’s supposed to be doing. It doesn’t really matter, but nonetheless.

His breath is hot against my thighs and I can physically feel myself start to tremble. He keeps making wide arcs with his pencils, every now and then changing them up for a new one.

I notice even more details about him that I hadn’t before. Like the deep crease in his forehead as he pays close attention to my body. And the way he squints one eye as he looks up and back down to the page.

I can’t believe how nervous I am… I mean all I’m doing is literally sitting here, doing nothing at all. But just the very act alone and having him so close to me, so close to that part of me even, it’s making me feel a different kind of anxiety.

“Breathe, Falyn. I don’t need you passing out and hitting your head on the floor,” Matt says, his voice gruff.

I nod and try to swallow against the dryness in my mouth. I would kill for some water right about now. “Do you mind if I get something to drink?”

He sighs loudly, looking up at me with obvious impatience. “Can you give me just a few more minutes? I really need you to hold still and stay right there. I need to fix something and you keep moving.”

Really? I hadn’t even realized I’d moved it all. I thought I had been doing a pretty decent job of staying still.

I shrug my shoulders though and try to do as he says. After a few more minutes however, I start running my fingers on the side of the stool. “How about now?”

Exasperated, Matt firmly plants his feet back onto the floor, taking hold of one of the stool legs and pulling me even closer to him. Without even asking me he grabs hold of the back of my left knee and pushes it away from my right knee, leaving my legs wide open and giving him an all access view of between my legs.

“
No
. I seriously need you to sit still just for a few more minutes.”

I scowl down at him, already impatient myself. “It’s not going to hurt you or this drawing if I go get a bottle of water.”

I don’t even comment on how he just grabbed me like that. Mainly because I don’t want him thinking he can get to me like that. And also because, well, maybe I liked it. A little bit.

“You know what?” Matt says, pushing himself backwards from me and glaring back at me. “It may not hurt me, but it will mess up the vision I have going here, all right? So just stay put. Like I told you to.”

I put my hands on my hips, in disbelief. “Are you seriously talking to me like that right now? Who the hell do you think you are?”

But instead of getting even angrier, Matt just smirks at me with that ridiculous crooked smile of his. “I’m Matt fucking Walsh. The one who’s drawing you? The one who
you
are commissioning to do amazing pieces of art for your hotels? You know, that guy.”

He stands up, pulling himself up to his full height next to me. “I have a new idea. Take the rest of your clothes off. Now.”

It’s like the wind has been knocked out of me and I reel back, completely shocked. “You’re not serious!”

He raises a brow at me, challenging me. “’Course I am. I want you to take the rest of your clothes off. I want to sketch all of you—it’s the only way I can do this.”

His voice lowers at the end of the sentence and heat spreads down from my belly making me squeeze my thighs tightly together as if I’m warding off evil.

“I will do no such thing.”

But even as I say it, and as the trembling words leave my lips I know my resolve is quickly crumbling apart. Matt’s eyes are flashing at me, challenging me again. He knows I’m going to say yes. It’s just a matter of time to him.

And Matt does not seem like a very patient person. Ugh,
men
.

Remember why you’re doing this in the first place. Just do what he wants to get it over with already. You don’t want to act like a total prude when he already thinks you are, right? You want to prove yourself to him. Show him who the real boss is here. Because it’s definitely not him.

Even the inner pep-talk makes me angry, but I know deep down my subconscious is right. I glare at him as I stand up quickly, yanking the hemline of my tank top up and over my head and tossing it aside. Now I’m just standing in my bra and underwear in front of Matt Walsh.

I reach back behind myself and I undo the clasp to my bra hook, brazenly sliding it off and throwing it backwards. One more piece to go.

I look down, unable to keep my gaze on him any longer as I slowly peel off my underwear until I’m standing completely naked in the middle of the studio. My own voice echoes in the back of my head.
‘With my name comes a certain reputation, if you will. I’m not about to mar that just to be another one of your cover girls.’

He probably knew then. He knew he’d break me eventually somehow. The tables really have turned.

Oh my god… what the fuck am I doing? Red sirens go off in my head and I’m losing my resolve just as quickly as it came. I go to cover parts of me up but Matt steps forward, and here I think he’s getting ready to try something but he doesn’t.

He carefully takes my arm and pulls it away from my chest. “You have nothing to be ashamed of. You can do this.” I don’t expect the sudden softness in his voice, like he actually cares.

My heart beat pulses in so many different places on my body, my blood running thick and heavy through my veins. The heat that’s spreading down to my core is aching now, and I know that this whole time has been leading up to this. It’s almost as if I’ve always been meant to do this with Matt.

He’s a spectator to my willingness. And judging by how he’s keeping his hand right in front of his own crotch I can tell that he’s enjoying it far more than he’s letting on.

“Now, I want you to go sit on the couch over there.”

I take my seat but am completely surprised when Matt sits right next to me, touching me again as he poses my legs for me.

When his hand grazes my lower hip where it meets my ass I have to draw in a quick breath, feeling like I’m a plane losing altitude. There’s just not enough air in this room for me to breathe with how close he is to me.

Matt roughly turns me this way and that, posing my arms so one is lounging off the back of the couch while the other is placed in my lap carefully.

I wish I could read his thoughts and see what he thinks of me this way. I know I really shouldn’t give a damn whatsoever, especially with how much of an asshole he really is, but the intense concentration in his face as he sketches me tells me that maybe there’s more to him than meets the eye.

I’m surprised to see how rough and calloused his fingers are as they rub against my soft skin every time he moves me another way. I try not to think about what those rough fingers would feel like against other parts of my body…

I swallow again, really wishing I had that drink of water right about now.

I wonder if Matt can read my mind when he gets up and walks over to another corner of the studio before bringing back two bottles of cold water for us. I hurry up and chug down half the water bottle as if I just ran a marathon. I try to graciously wipe the water from my face but I know I’m losing my grip on reality here. It’s nearly impossible given the situation I’ve stuck myself in.

But I guess there’s no point in being shy anymore.

When Matt stands up again he turns away for a moment before shrugging off his own T-shirt, giving me a very close up view of his muscular back and shoulders. It’s hard not to look away as he bends over again, picking up a dropped pencil. He does have a ridiculously fine ass.

My eyes travel upwards, sweeping over the indentions above his cheeks and following the lines of muscle racing towards the shape of his shoulder blades.

And that’s when I notice the scars.