Loving Kate (Acceptance #3) (8 page)

He’s trying to get me drunk.

He knows I’d have to be to get on that bull.

As we continue to watch the bull riders, my nerves increase in intensity. It’s obvious from the smirk on his face he’s picked up on how nervous I am
and
he’s enjoying it. “Relax, Kate. It’s just a ride. I’ll even go first if it will make you feel better.”

“It’s like a sex fest over there! Why don’t I remember it being so sexual before?”

Mike laughs hard. “Maybe because we weren’t that sexual back then? Or maybe because people are a little more open with their sexuality now? Or maybe it’s because we know how to let our freak flags fly now,” he says, wiggling his eyebrows at me.

Hmmm, maybe.

“Look at all the lurkers. As soon as I get off I’m going to get accosted.” Mikes laughing even harder, and I immediately catch my error. “I mean get off of the bull. Mind out of the gutter, Matthews.”

He raises his hands like he’s backing off. “Hey now, I can’t help where my mind goes. Besides, you totally walked into that one.” Pure happiness radiates from him and I have to admit it’s contagious.

“If it will make you feel better, I’ll be your pseudo boyfriend for ten minutes, okay? That should be long enough to save
both
of our sexual virtues from the horny pack of bull riders.”

“That’s a great idea! Once we finish, though, I want s’mores.”

He holds out his hand to me and nods. “S’mores sound good. They’ll sober you up a little, too.”

It’s crowded, but since it’s a weeknight, it’s not nearly as packed as usual. Since I’m about to lose my bull riding virginity I’m thankful for the slightly smaller crowd. As promised, Mike goes first but the ride operator isn’t as gentle on the men and he flies off pretty quickly. I think he might have wacked his balls against the hand hold on his way down. He winces a bit as he gets up.

“You okay?” I ask him, giggling, but I’m truly worried about his man parts.

He pulls me in close, his breath caressing my ear. I’m holding my breath as he whispers, “I think my baby makers are broken.” I laugh as he places a kiss on my cheek. “Good luck, baby, now go ride that bull like you’d ride me.”

He says it loud enough for everyone to hear and if I thought I was going to go deaf from the music before that was nothing compared to the whooping and hollering of the crowd. Of course the ride operator uses it to his advantage “What’s your girl’s name?” he yells across to Mike.

There’s a devious gleam in Mike’s eyes as he replies “Jessica, but all her good friends call her Jess.” He nods that he’s got it and after I’m straddled onto the bull, he holds nothing back.

“Alright, everyone, let’s hear it for our new friend Jess! Now, we all heard her boyfriend tell her to ride our bull like she rides him at home, so I think we’re in for a show.”

My cheeks were already flushed from the alcohol, my palms sweaty from nerves, but the embarrassment zinging through me makes my entire body burn. I catch Mike out of the corner of my eyes, laughing and shrugging his shoulders in a semi apology. At least he had the decency to not give my real name.

The bull starts off nice and slow, periodically gyrating a few times in a forward motion, but I’m able to hold on with just one hand. I don’t really know how long this goes on, maybe a minute or so, when I hear the announcer tell Mike over the PA system that he’s a lucky man. At this point, he’s done being nice and the bull starts bucking around like crazy. I’m able to hold it together for about another thirty seconds or so before I go flying off.

Someone helps me to my feet and I stumble over to Mike as the crowd starts chanting ‘kiss, kiss, kiss, kiss’.

Hell, at this point what does it matter? Mike’s eyes seek permission from mine as I wrap my arms around his neck and pull him close. He kisses me and the crowd goes wild. It’s just like the kiss we shared in my bed a few days ago—a little more than just friends, but not exactly like lovers. Whatever it is, I allow myself to feel it and the crowd cheers their approval.

Once we’re back at the table, I’m a little speechless but that’s not an issue; Mike is on a roll.

“Who knew being your ten minute boyfriend would be so exciting?” I roll my eyes at him as he continues, “We even got to role play, Kate. You’ve
got
to admit that was kind of hot.” Then the bastard winks at me.

“You’ve been hanging out with Connor
way
too much.” Even though I want to be serious, I can’t contain my laughter.

“Oh, come on, Kate, you’re wink worthy and you know it. As a matter of fact, I’d say you’re very aware of your sexuality since you asked me to be your pseudo boyfriend.”

I’m blushing furiously and Mike is enjoying the hell out of it. “It’s pretty hot, actually. I mean ,you’ve always been hot but who knew what a sexual vixen you were going to turn out to be.”

“You’re being stupid,” I tell him as I shake my head.

“No, I’m being
honest
. You’re breathtaking, Kate, and I will kick myself for the rest of my life for losing you to my best friend. He’s a lucky bastard and he better get his head out of his ass soon or I really will try and win you back.”

There’s wistfulness in his tone and it makes me happy and sad at the same time. We’re building our new friendship and this is exactly the kind of conversation I would have with Connor, but I think somewhere inside we’re both longing to go back into our comfort zone with each other.

“While I appreciate the sentiment, and don’t doubt that the two of us could set a room on fire with our passion, we both know we’re past that. But that doesn’t mean I don’t want to hear about you setting a room on fire with someone else. So tell me, lover boy, what’s going on with Misty? Anything I should know about?”

The boyish smile that spreads across his face lets me know he’s not at all upset about me blowing him off. Relief washes over me and I feel my muscles relax. I wasn’t even aware of how tense I was.

“Things with Misty are good. I’ve seen her a few times and we talk at least once a day but text often.”

“Are you going to ask her out?”

“We’re working up to it. She’s got a lot going on in her life, more than I think she’s even telling me, but I’m trying to be patient. I realized something, though…” There’s a sadness to his tone now and he fiddles with a straw wrapper.

“What is it, Mike? You can tell me anything, you know that. Let me help you.”

“It’s just…well…ugh, this shouldn’t be this hard. I finally admitted to myself and to her that the reason why I pushed her away was because she evoked feelings in me that I’d only ever had with you.”

Immediately, tears fall from my eyes.

“Kate…oh, Kate, I’m so sorry. We’re not there yet, and you and Daniel…god I’m
such
an idiot.” He kicks his chair and my gaze finds his and holds it.

“Stop it, Mike, they’re combination tears?”

His face scrunches up and I know he’s as perplexed as I feel. “Okay… not happy and not sad, but combination…go on.”

Laughing through my tears, I explain, “I’m so happy for you that you’re at the point where you’re moving on and you’ve admitted it to yourself. That’s huge, Mike. I’m so proud of you.”

“But?”

“But at the same time, I’m a little bit sad about it. It’s a natural progression of how things are going to be between us. I guess now I understand how you felt about Daniel and me. We’re growing up, Mike.”

“Are you ready to go?” There’s an edge to his tone. I hope I haven’t made him angry. Nodding, I grab my purse and coat while he settles up the bill. Once we’re outside and waiting for the valet, he pulls me into his warm embrace.

“We’re growing up, Katie Grace, but not apart. Never. Promise me I won’t lose you again. You’re my best friend and I
need
you in my life.”

He’s scared. That’s something I completely understand.

“Never again, Mike. I promise. No matter where life takes us you’ll always be my best friend. Just don’t tell Connor. It might bruise his ego.”

Mike snorts and pulls me closer. “What about Marc? Can I tell him?”

I look at him with a raised eyebrow just as the truck pulls up. After we get inside and pull away, I finally answer him. “You never asked me to choose, Mike. In all those years you never
once
asked me to choose. I love Marc. He is very important to me, but you are
more
important.
Always
. Maybe I should have told you that before, but I’m telling you now. He might be my soul keeper but
you
are my soul mate.”

I swear I see tears pooling in his eyes but it’s dark and it’s hard to tell.

“I thought Daniel was your soul mate?”

I reach across, placing my hand on his. “Daniel is my soul mate for love but
you’re
my soul mate for life. Every important life experience I’ve had has been with you. First loves, first kiss, first person we made love to, first heartbreak, creating life and losing it, losing our parents, and most importantly first friends. God gave me you for life and he gave me Daniel for love.”

“Isn’t that…isn’t that harsh or wrong somehow?” His voice is pained and his grip on my hand tightens.

“I don’t think so. There is so much Daniel and I will experience in that love, including friendship, and our own firsts, if we ever get there. But it will never take away from us. And since the two of you are best friends, I really hope it will never even be a question. We’ll figure it out as we go along. Just know that you are so important to me. We might not be an us anymore, but I haven’t felt this complete as a person in years. Not since you left.”

He raises my hand to his mouth and kisses it gently. “Me either, Kate, me either.”

It was a pretty quiet ride home after that. After Mike walked me to the door, he went next door to check on Daniel and Lucas and I went to sleep with mixed emotions and a broken heart.

Vanessa came home a few days later on Sunday. April and I decorated the front of the house again so she could have the full experience. She was ecstatic and crying, but who could blame her? She finally got to really feel like a mom for the first time. Daniel brought Lucas out to wait for her and my heart began to race when he came over and stood next to me. We’ve talked a little bit the past few days. I’ve watched Lucas two more times for him and have fallen even more in love with him than I ever thought possible. I’m so lucky to be a part of his life. The nightly text messages are the best. Every night Daniel texts me a picture of Lucas with the same ‘I love you’ comment. So every night I reply back the same, that I love them both. Daniel
has
to be coming around, right? I mean, he wouldn’t keep doing it if he didn’t want to hear I still loved him, too. At least, I hope he wouldn’t. Our conversations have been pretty superficial but at least we’re having them.

I wonder if he realizes how sexy he looks as he holds Lucas. He’s a very devoted father, but I knew he would be. It’s a natural instinct for him; he makes it look as easy as breathing.

God I miss him.

He’s right next to me but I feel a million miles away from his love. 

Once Vanessa was out of the car, in between her squeals of happiness, she was sobbing as Daniel placed Lucas in her arms. Chad observed carefully as she smothered him in kisses, snuggling him close, and breathing in his scent. I can’t blame her; he really does smell good. Lucas smells like baby and Daniel all mixed up in one.

April hugged her and welcomed them home but had to leave to go have lunch with her sisters. While she was here, we talked about the bridal shower, bachelorette party, and dress fittings. It’s going to be a busy couple of months for us all. Daniel told Chad and Vanessa he would be in shortly and let them have a little family bonding time right away.

“So I heard you rode a bull and that Mike is probably sterile now. I think I would have paid good money to see that.” Daniel grins as he leans back against Chad’s car.

“Paid good money to see me ride a bull or Mike get sterilized by said bull?”

“Both,” he replies, immediately laughing. “But then I’d probably be jealous of that bull.” His husky tone lights me on fire.

“Why? Because he got the pleasure of hitting Mike? Or because I rode him bareback?” I ask in my sexy tone, looking him straight in the eyes.

He lets out a deep breath and inches really close to me. If I thought my heart was racing before it’s nothing compared to the marathon it’s running right now.

He bends down and whispers in my ear, “Both.” It’s just one word, but as his breath caresses my ear and his scent invades my nostrils, I feel myself getting turned on.

As he backs away, I feel his loss but I’m hopeful something will change. This is the most forward he’s been with me since before I slept with Marc.

“Well, I should probably go in and show them where everything is and let them know Lucas’s routine.”

Do you guys have a schedule planned out yet?” I do really want to know, but I’m also fishing so I know when I might be able to see him.

“Not yet. I figure I’ll give them time to adjust, but I’ll definitely come by at least once a day to see him. I’m kind of attached to putting him to bed, so hopefully Vanessa will let me come by for bedtime. Then it won’t affect work, either.” He looks heartbroken, but I guess I would be, too, if it were me.