Lover's Road (3 page)

3

Cortland

Monnique and I were about to move in together again, but I changed my mind at the last minute. While I loved her and I wanted to be with her, we had to take this slow. I was still healing from the break up. It would take me a while to completely get over it.

She was patient with me. As long as
we were together, monogamously, she didn’t seem to mind. Every time I needed my space or I pulled away from her embrace, she understood and let me be. She didn’t pressure me one way or another.

When I imagined her moving on with someone else, it made me shake in pain. I didn’t want her to end up
with anyone else. Her little ploy totally tricked me and made me beg to be with her again, but I didn’t have any anger toward her. She made me realize how much I loved her and couldn’t be apart from her. The fact Victor wasn’t real made it better. It made me appreciate Monnique when I thought I couldn’t.

I arrived at her apartment, wearing dark jeans and a red t-shirt with a black jacket. We were going out to dinner, doing something normal couples did. She and I ate at home most of the time, but we liked to have a date night a few times a week. We were getting back into the routine of normalcy.

She opened the door wearing skinny jeans, boots, a black top, and a short jacket that showed her stomach. When she dressed like this, she looked like a model. She could pull off any style and any clothes. She was perfect in that way.

“You look amazing,” I blurted. Her appearance always took me by surprise. When I thought she couldn’t be more beautiful, she proved me wrong.

She grabbed either side of my jacket and pulled my lips to hers. She was more aggressive than she used to be, treasuring me after our time apart. When our lips touched, my cock grew hard in my jeans. She always aroused me even when we were being tender. It was hard to have a gorgeous girlfriend and not have a hard-on all the time. “You look delicious.”

I smirked then rubbed my nose against hers. “Thank you.”

She led me back into the apartment, taking a few steps back.

I wrapped my arms around her waist and steadied her. “Let’s get through dinner first.”

She growled playfully. “Fine.”

We made love as soon as we were back together, but after the initial time, I
ended the physical relationship. I wanted to be back to where we were before we became serious again. While I loved her and wanted to spend my life with her, she couldn’t erase the past overnight. She would have to earn my trust again.

We left the apartment and arrived at the restaurant. I pulled her chair out for her then sat across from her. A few heads turned her way, checking out her perfection. I stopped caring about the stares of other men a long time ago. There was nothing I could do about it, and honestly, I didn’t blame them. Even if she wore a wedding ring, they’d give it a shot.

She looked through the menu. “What are you getting?”

I browsed through the selections. “Probably the salmon.”

“Good choice.” Her eyes were glued to the words on the page. “I think I’m getting the steak.”

“Someone’s hungry,” I said with a smile.

“I have to gain back all the weight I lost.”

That made me sad. When I saw her for the first time, I immediately noticed the difference in her weight. She lost at least
five pounds, and she was already thin. She couldn’t afford to lose anymore.

After the waiter took our order, the silence descended. We used to be comfortable with each other when we didn’t speak, but that was gone. Now it was slightly awkward.

“How’s work?” she asked.

“Fine,” I said. “Sean put a hanger on his office door so Mike would know not to walk inside. That was pretty funny.”

“Why didn’t he just lock it?” she asked.

I rolled my eyes. “He
says it’s the principle...”

She chuckled. “Those two are a riot.”

“They are odd,” I said with a smile.

She looked down, avoiding my look. “How’s Hazel?”

It’s been almost a week and we hadn’t spoken. When she had school and work, we didn’t communicate often. She was busy and so was I. “We haven’t spoken.”

“Oh.”

What did that mean?

“So, she doesn’t know we’re back together?”

I forgot to mention it to her. “No.”

“Are you going to tell her…?”

Why did it matter?
“When I see her.”

She nodded.

“Monnique, I don’t have feelings for her.”

“I know,” she said quickly.
She still didn’t look at me.

“Then what does it matter?”

“It doesn’t.”

“Monnique,” I said firmly. “What is it?”

She finally met my gaze. “Just because you don’t have feelings for her, doesn’t mean she doesn’t have feelings for you.”

I never told Monnique about Hazel’s desire to have a physical relationship and something down the road. It wasn’t relevant, and took place when I had no idea what Monnique was doing. I didn’t feel obligated to tell her. “I don’t see why it would matter.”

“You think she’s just going to accept me as your girlfriend? She’ll try to convince you that you made a mistake so she can have you to herself.”

“She would never do that,” I said simply. “She’s my friend and wants what’s best for me.”

“And what if leaving me is what’s best for you?”

I never heard her sound so insecure. “While I appreciate the advice everyone in my life gives me, my decisions are my own. No one can force me or persuade me to do any
thing. Ryan, the guy I do everything with, vehemently hated you and I still took you back. You don’t need to worry about anything but yourself.”

She opened her mouth to speak but the waiter brought our food. He placed it on the table then walked away. I picked up my fork but didn’t eat. She glanced at her food then ignored it. “I guess I’m threatened by her, to be honest.”

“You shouldn’t be,” I said firmly.

“Will you still see her?”

“Why wouldn’t I?”

She shrugged. “You were hanging out with her because you were depressed. Now you aren’t. She doesn’t seem necessary at this point.”

“I was a walking corpse, Monnique. She was the only one who understood on a deep level. When everyone else was hanging out with their girlfriend or their wife, I was alone. But she kept me company and was my friend. No, I’m not going to stop seeing her. You’ll have to deal with that.” I didn’t mean to sound so angry but it came out that way. I guess I was irritated she didn’t trust me. “If I wanted to sleep with her, I would have done it. Now that we’re together, it’s even less of a possibility. And if you didn’t want me hanging out with other women, you shouldn’t have dumped me.” That was cold. I knew it was.

Her voice came out empty. “You’re always going to throw that in my face, aren’t you?”

My comment was below the belt. I was normally forgiving and understanding with Monnique. I babied her most of the time. But all that went out the window when she left me. Now she had to start over. “Until I’m over it…”

She picked her greens with her fork then chewed quietly. I wasn’t hungry but I ate anyway, unsure what else to do with myself.

“Cortland?”

“Hmm?”

“I’m sorry…for being jealous.”

That calmed me down a little. “It’s okay.”

“So, she’s never had feelings for you?”

Damn. I was cornered.

She stared at my face, waiting for me to respond. “Cortland?”

“It doesn’t matter,” I said quickly.

That was a confession to her. The blood left her face. “Is she…in love with you?”

“It doesn’t matter how she felt about me. I’m with you now. She’ll understand it and respect it. Believe me.”

The fire she usually had returned. “Answer me.”

I couldn’t get out of this. “No, she isn’t in love with me.”

“But she has feelings for you?”

“I guess a little.”

She threatened me with her eyes, forcing me to continue.

“What?” I said. “You thought no one would be interested in me when I was single?”

“Not at all,” she said. “Now stop avoiding the question.”

“She said she would like to be something more when I was over you. And she wanted to have a physical relationship to speed up the process.”

Monnique didn’t react. Her face was stoic, but I knew a rage was burning inside her. She was never particularly jealous, but if a girl was hitting on me, she made it perfectly clear I was off limits. And now I knew it was killing her. Because if she hadn’t left, none of this would have happened.

“And you said no?” she asked.

“I already told you I didn’t sleep with anyone,” I said with an irritated voice.

“Why did you say no?”

I looked into her eyes. “Do I really need to answer that?”

“Was it because you hoped I would come back, or because you weren’t over me?”

“I don’t know,” I said with a shrug. “I just wasn’t ready to have sex with someone that wasn’t you. I’d think about you the whole time, comparing everything she did to you. I wouldn’t enjoy it. I would feel empty. Does that answer your question?”

She nodded.

I dug into my food, assuming the conversation was over.

“And you think it’s a good idea to spend time with her?”

“She’s my friend.” That’s all I said.

Monnique backed down and ate her dinner. But I knew she was screaming inside.

When we came back to the apartment, we sat on the couch and turned on the TV. She snuggled into me, holding me
tightly while we watched a late night talk show. My fingers moved through her hair, missing the silkiness to it. Her familiar smell entered my nostrils, reminding me of our relationship before she left. I missed that. There was an unbreakable trust between us. Now only slivers of it remained.

Monnique left my side then disappeared into the bedroom. When she came out, she was wearing slutty lingerie.

And my cock sprang to life.

I told her I wasn’t ready to have sex on a regular basis, but she was intent on doing other things. I got a blow job every night this week, and I knew I was about to get another one.

She kneeled between my legs, her tits pushed together in perkiness. I should tell her this wasn’t necessary, but she was too hot to deny. Her hands moved up my thighs slowly until she reached the button of my jeans. She undid it then slid them down, pulling my briefs with them.

I felt dirty for letting her do this but I was too weak to stop her. Monnique gave the best head in the world. And after not getting laid for three months, I was horny as hell. She was the only person I could do this with. If I really wanted to get my dick wet, I could have picked up countless girls at the bars but I never did. Monnique was the only woman I wanted.

She licked the tip, making me gasp at the feel of her warm mouth. She rubbed her tongue up and down the base, making me rock my hips because I wanted to feel the back of her throat. Seeing her on her knees at my feet was the hottest thing in the world. Her mouth sucked the head of my cock before she took the plunge and sheathed me entirely.

“Fuck…” I grabbed her hair and fisted it, guiding her up and down my cock. God, it felt so good.

She deep throated me then sucked the tip before she did it again. I leaned back and enjoyed it like a sick bastard. I love getting head as much as I enjoyed her warm and tight pussy. But sitting back and enjoying it was the best part.

She took me to the back of her throat as I felt the explosion deep in my balls.

“I’m going to come,” I whispered. I always gave her the option of pulling away before I came in her mouth. But she always swallowed it like a pro. I felt the pleasurable explosion up my shaft and I came inside her mouth, loving every second of the awesome orgasm. “Baby…”

She sucked the tip again before she pulled me out of her. Then she crawled into my lap, wanting to be close to me. I was never selfish in bed, and I wasn’t going to start now just because she broke my heart.

I moved her on her back then yanked her underwear off. She tensed when she knew what I was going to do. I knew she loved it when I went down on her. It was the tastiest thing I’d ever had in my mouth.

As soon as my mouth touched her nub, she moaned loudly and arched her back. Monnique was extremely sexual with me, wanting me all the time. And I knew she loved it when I ate her pussy.

I moved my tongue over her folds while I rubbed her clitoris with my thumb. She was already panting, at the edge of her ecstasy. I moved her clitoris harder and used my tongue to slide inside her.

Her head rolled back. “Cortland…”

Bingo. She was there.

She dug her nails into my hair as
she writhed on the couch, enjoying every last second until she was completely finished.

I pulled my mouth away then snuggled beside her on the couch. We both wore no bottoms, and we caught our breath together. It was odd to do something so juvenile together, but I wanted to take this slow. And she didn’t complain.