Love Letters: A Rose Harbor Novel (23 page)

“I’m more in the mood for soup,” Maggie said.

“Soup?” her husband repeated, and seemed surprised.

Then Maggie remembered that when she was pregnant with both boys the only thing she’d been able to keep down the first few months was soup. It wouldn’t take much for him to put two and two together.

“On second thought, the crab cakes sound good.” They didn’t, but she needed to steer him away from any suspicion that she might be pregnant. Somehow she’d manage to keep the crab down.

The waiter came for their order and Roy asked for a French dip. Oh dear, this was going to be difficult. The smell of cooked beef always caused her problems when she was pregnant. It might not
have been as bad before she had proof positive, but every symptom she’d ever suffered was sure to make itself apparent now.

When she looked up, Maggie noticed the waiter was ready to take her order. “The Dungeness crab cakes,” she said.

“Excellent choice,” he said, as he wrote it down and left them.

Roy’s phone rang and he automatically reached for it. Maggie froze, fearing it was Katherine. She already knew that the other woman hadn’t taken kindly to having their relationship abruptly severed and had tried a couple times to reach Roy.

“Who is it?” she asked.

His gaze met hers, and his look told Maggie that her suspicions were well grounded.

“Don’t worry, I’m not going to answer it.”

“I thought you blocked her number.”

“I did, but she isn’t calling from her cell. This is the landline from her house.” He pinched his lips together, revealing his disapproval. “I don’t know when she’s going to get the message; we’re finished. I’m sorry, sweetheart, but you know it’s over, right?”

Maggie believed him and then was left to wonder if her news would drive him back to Katherine’s more-than-willing arms.

As soon as the call went to voice mail, Roy spent a few minutes on his phone, blocking the other woman’s home number.

“I don’t want you to have a single doubt about my commitment to you,” he said, reaching across the table and gripping hold of her fingers with his own. “I feel better about us than I have in months. I don’t know what I was thinking ever getting involved with her.”

Maggie looked away. “Thank you for loving me,” she whispered.

“I’ll always love you, Maggie. I knew it when we were in college, which is one reason I wrote that letter. I’m glad you kept it all these years.”

“Me, too. I love you … I’ll always love you, Roy. Always. No matter what happens in the future. Remember that, okay?” Moisture filled her eyes and spilled down her cheeks before she could
keep them at bay. Maggie quickly wiped the tears away. “Look at me, getting all emotional,” she said, attempting to laugh at herself.

It seemed Roy was about to say something more when the waiter returned with their entrées. “Enjoy,” he said.

Maggie took one look at Roy’s sandwich and nearly gagged. If he noticed, he didn’t say anything. Then, as if he hadn’t eaten in weeks, Roy wolfed down his lunch while she picked at her crab cakes.

The waiter noticed her lack of appetite when he came to clear away their plates. “Was there something wrong with the entrée, Miss?” he asked.

Maggie assured him with a quick shake of her head. “I guess I wasn’t as hungry as I thought.”

He removed her plate, and Maggie made a show of looking at her wrist. “It’s just about time for the tour,” she said, more than grateful for the distraction.

Roy stood and paid their tab. Then, together, they walked over to where a small group of tourists had assembled, awaiting the tour.

The guide collected their tickets and then led them through a restaurant and down the stairs to the underground area.

As Maggie suspected, there wasn’t a whole lot to see, but the guide was full of stories regarding Seattle’s early history, telling anecdote after anecdote that had the group entertained and laughing.

“That was great,” Maggie heard the woman in front of her comment as they left the tour.

“Really good,” someone else said.

“What did you think?” Maggie asked Roy.

“It was okay.”

“Roy, it was wonderful.” Like the others, Maggie had been amused and educated at the same time. And, bless her, the guide had helped Maggie keep her mind off how unsettled her stomach felt.

“I think it’s time we got back to the inn,” Roy surprised her by suggesting.

“Are you sure? We still have time to visit the Seattle Center if you like.”

“Another time,” he said. “Is that all right with you?”

“It’s fine; whatever you want.” She didn’t know why she protested. Getting back to the inn was exactly what she wanted. She yawned once, feeling like she needed a nap. If she fell asleep in the car on the drive back, Roy was sure to guess. She never took naps … unless she was sick or pregnant.

They walked back to the parking lot, and she noticed that once more Roy reached for her hand the way he had earlier in the day. She chanced a look in his direction but couldn’t read his thoughts. Testing the waters, she offered him a tentative smile.

He smiled back.

Her relief was instantaneous. She could keep her secret a little bit longer.

“What if I buy us a bottle of wine?” Roy suggested. “We can have the cheese, bread, grapes, and wine on the lawn at the inn. That would be a perfect way to end our afternoon, don’t you think?”

“It’s a lovely idea.” Maggie would find a convenient excuse to avoid the wine. She’d always watched her diet whenever she was pregnant, and she wouldn’t do anything less this time.

“Shall we drive back instead of the ferry?”

That had been their original plan.

“Sure, and stop at the car museum in Tacoma?” Her husband’s look was hopeful.

Maggie smiled and nodded. She’d never paid that much attention to cars, but they were a passion with Roy, who subscribed to a number of car magazines.

Finding their way to the freeway seemed a challenge, but once they were on the main thoroughfare, Maggie relaxed and, despite her best effort, found herself drifting off to sleep.

She shook herself awake and found Roy studying her. “My goodness, what’s wrong with you?” he asked. “You’ve slept more this
weekend than you have in the last two years. This last month has been stressful, hasn’t it?”

Maggie agreed. “It has.”

“Well, you’ll get a chance to catch up now. We’ve weathered this storm, Maggie girl, and our marriage is stronger for it, don’t you think?”

What Roy didn’t know was that they had even deeper waters to traverse. Nor did he realize that they were about to get caught up in hurricane-force winds.

Ellie hurried to where she’d agreed to meet her father. Her head was spinning as questions hurled themselves at her so quickly it was all she could do to keep focused on where she was walking. Excitement mingled with anxiety about what she would say to this man who was her father and yet a stranger.

In his text message back to her, Tom had suggested the Pot Belly Deli as a good place for Ellie to meet with Scott. It was close and convenient. Looking at the street map provided by Jo Marie, she noticed the deli was next to the hair salon where she’d been the day before. The salon appointment reminded Ellie of everything she had done to impress Tom and the chance she’d taken meeting him. Yet all she’d meant to him was the means to an end. She was just a charity project, a gift for his stepfather.

Seeing that it was the middle of the afternoon, the lunch crowd
had already eaten and it was too early for dinner, so there were plenty of empty tables. They would have the privacy they needed. This would be the first time in her life that she’d have the opportunity to talk to the man responsible for her birth, the first time she’d have a chance to hear his side of what had happened in her parents’ marriage.

Scott was seated in a booth when she arrived at the deli. He looked up, saw it was her, and offered her what could only be described as a tentative, guilt-ridden smile. As she approached the table, he stood. Ellie glanced around the room to be certain Tom wasn’t anywhere close by. She remained angry and upset by his deception, and while she was willing to meet with her father, she wasn’t ready to deal with Tom.

As it was, her nerves were stretched to the snapping point seeing Scott Reynolds.

“Thank you for agreeing to meet with me,” he said. He looked as nervous as Ellie felt. He folded his hands on the tabletop as if unsure what to do with them. Before she realized what she was doing, Ellie reached for a fork and ran her fingers down the handle. Embarrassed, she set it aside.

Her mouth had gone dry, so she said nothing.

Neither spoke. Scott studied Ellie for a long moment. “You look like your mother,” he said, gazing at her so intently that Ellie was forced to look away.

The waitress came, and they both ordered coffee.

As soon as the woman left, Scott returned his attention to her. “How is your mother?”

“She’s well.”

“I imagine you’re angry with me.”

Actually, her anger was directed at Tom. She had yet to form an opinion of Scott. Part of her wanted to reach out and hug him and another part wanted to shout at him in fury for the years he’d ignored her.

“Tell me,” she said, trying hard to keep her voice level and void
of emotion, “in all the years you were out of my life, did you ever wonder about me?” This was the first of many questions that came to mind. The first one that demanded an answer.

“Every single day.” His eyes didn’t waver from hers. “Not a day went by that I didn’t think about you. We might have been apart, but you were right next to my heart, Ellie. Always and forever. I thought about you on your birthday, at Christmas. I wondered how you did in school and if you played the piano the way your mother and grandmother did. I lay awake at night dreaming of the little girl I barely had a chance to know, although I’ve loved you your entire life.”

Ellie wanted to believe him, but she’d seen precious little evidence of it. She hated to be cynical, but she found his declaration of love hard to fathom. “But you never … not even once took the time to write or call or contact me.”

“No,” he said, and hung his head as if the weight of his failure as her father demanded that he look away. “When your mother and I first split, I did everything within my power to get visitation rights.”

“I suppose you’re going to tell me my mother made that impossible.”

“No,” Scott corrected. “I think your mother would have been more than willing to allow you to spend time with me on weekends. It was your grandparents. From the first, I rubbed them the wrong way. They had someone else in mind for your mother to marry, some rich guy who was the son of a longtime family friend.” His mouth tightened, and anger fired in his eyes.

He stopped talking, and Ellie could see the tension in his squared shoulders.

Then he said, “It does no good to rehash old hurts. The only reason I mention it is so you’ll understand that I did my best, but I couldn’t afford expensive attorney fees and your grandparents could. They wanted me out of your life and made sure it happened.”

“My grandparents are both gone now,” Ellie told him, and they had been for a long time. Surely he must have realized that.

“I figured they must be.”

“You could have found me. I’m an adult now, and I make my own decisions.”

He didn’t argue with her. “You’re right, of course.”

“Then why didn’t you?”

He looked down at his hands and she noticed that he’d shredded the paper napkin into a neat stack. “I don’t have a good excuse. I guess I was afraid.”

“Afraid of what?” She wasn’t that intimidating.

It took Scott a long time to answer, and when he did, he couldn’t have surprised her more. “I was afraid of you.”

“Of me?” She pressed her hand against her chest. “Of me?” she repeated, still unable to take it in. “But why?”

“I was sure you must hate me.”

“How could I hate you when I don’t know you?” Ellie returned, her voice elevated until she captured the attention of those around her.

Their coffee was delivered, and Ellie reached for two packets of sugar.

Scott reached for two packets of sugar.

Ellie reached for two cream containers.

Scott reached for two cream containers.

Ellie held her spoon with her left hand and stirred counterclockwise.

Scott stirred his coffee counterclockwise, holding the spoon with his left hand.

Ellie watched him mimic her movements. “Do you always drink your coffee with two sugars and two creams?” she asked.

He stared at her just as intently. “Do you always stir your coffee counterclockwise?”

Ellie nodded. “Do you?”

Scott nodded, and then a slow, easy smile started to take shape, transforming his mouth from a worried frown to a smile of delight and pleasure.

“Tell me why you were afraid of me,” she said, less demanding now that she was more at ease. Although they were virtual strangers, they were more alike than she would have ever guessed.

It took him a while to formulate his answer. “For all you knew, I’d abandoned you. I couldn’t be sure what your grandparents had said about me, if they’d mentioned me at all. Or what your mother had told you about the two of us.”