Love And Coffee: A Cup Of Grace Romance Series Book 1 (12 page)

              “Ay yi yi,” Matt said.  “Let’s try to focus and move on, shall we?  Jillian are there anymore pumpkin scones?”

              “No, that was the last of them,” she said and blew her nose. “I’ll never bake again,” she sniffed.

              “Nonsense,” Kathryn said.  “You’re still the best baker around.  We’ll get through this.”

              “What do you suppose she’s going to do with that scone?  She snatched it away awfully fast,” I said.

              “Take it to a lawyer,” Janey said.

              We all looked at her.

              “I’m just saying,” she said and shrugged her shoulders.

              “Well thanks for being positive and supportive,” I said.

              “Well, there’s positive and supportive and then there’s denial.  Look, it costs money to get a lawyer, so she probably won’t do a thing.”

              I hoped it was true.  Right at that moment, it didn’t feel true at all.  What would we do?  Did we have insurance against this sort of thing? I had no idea what sort of insurance Kathryn had purchased.  We certainly had never thought of something like this happening.  I sighed and said a little prayer.  We would get through this somehow.  I just hoped we would get through it without losing Cup of Grace.

CHAPTER NINETEEN

              “And if you abide in my word, you shall be my disciple indeed.  I love that verse,” Matt said.  “Tara, what’s your take on it?  What does it mean to you on a personal basis? Tara? Tara?”

              “Huh?  What?  I’m sorry, Matt. Yes, disciple.  What does that mean to me?” I sat and thought.  And suddenly realized I had no idea.  Tears sprung to my eyes.

              “Tara, it’s okay.  Sometimes we hear a verse all the time but never stop and think about what it means to us on a personal basis.  You don’t need to cry, honey,” he said putting a calming hand on my knee.

              “Awe Tara, it’s okay,” Jillian said and reached over and hugged me.

              “No, it’s not that,” I said.  It was mid-morning and things had slowed down to a crawl and we were having Bible study.  I kept looking at the door, expecting the roach lady to come running in, swearing revenge on us all.  But especially me since I had waited on her and served her the roach scone.  What were we going to do?

              “What is it?  The roach lady?” Kathryn asked.

              It probably didn’t help that we all had taken to referring to her as roach lady.  If she heard that, she would flip out even more than she had.  I just wished I knew what we were going to do.  I kept feeling like we were waiting for the other shoe to drop.  I had a feeling that once it did, it was going to be bad.  Really bad.

              “Yes,” I sniffed.  “I feel like we are waiting for something really bad to happen.”

              “She’ll probably just tell a few of her friends.  Maybe post it on Facebook.  It will blow ever and everything will be fine.”

              “Unless the post goes viral.  Then everyone in the city will know and no one wants a roach scone from a Cup of Filth.  We are doomed,” I wailed and started crying again.

              Jillian put her hand around my shoulder.  “I guess I am the one that’s cursed.  If I weren’t working here, everything would be fine.  You all would be successful.  I need to quit before it’s all over for you guys,” she sad and started to cry with me.

              “Don’t say that, Jillian, no one is cursed,” Kathryn said.

              “We just need to keep praying about it.  It was a mistake.  The thing probably crawled into the oven and was on the roof of it and when it got too hot, it fell in.  It’s not like we have been careless in how we’ve been handling all the food.  And we keep the place immaculate,” Matt said.  “We just have to keep believing that everything is going to work out.”

              “Yes, let’s stay positive,” Kathryn said.  “Let’s keep doing our Bible studies and let’s keep doing what the Lord has called us to do.”

              I sniffed.  “Okay, I’ll try to stay positive,” I said, wiping my eyes with a tissue.

              We all turned toward the door as it swung open.

              “Oh my gosh,” I said under my breath.  It was the roach lady.

              “There you are!” she said pointing at me.  “You gave me that filthy vermin filled scone yesterday!”

              A large burly man stepped into the shop behind her.

              “There she is,” the woman proclaimed pointing her finger at me.

              My heart stopped.  What on earth was she going to do to me?  I looked over at Matt for help.

              “Hello,” Matt said standing up.  “Please let me apologize for the um, incident from yesterday.  I am so sorry.”

              Thank you God, for sending me Matt.  He was a born diplomat.  And right now he was intent on saving my behind.

              The burly man stepped closer to me.  I took a step back.  He stepped closer, I stepped back. We were doing some kind of weird dance.

              “Now sir,” Matt began, stepping forward.

              “Quiet,” he said to Matt.  “Let me talk to this lady,” he said gesturing to me.

              I swallowed hard.

              “Yes?”

              “Did you serve my wife a roach baked into a scone?”

              I swallowed again.  “It wasn’t baked in to it.  It was just sitting there on top,” I said and felt tears threatening. “It was an accident.  I would never do something like that on purpose.”

              “Of course you wouldn’t,” the man said very calmly.  “I understand that accidents happen.  But as the proprietor, and I’m assuming you are the proprietor?”

              I nodded and indicated that the others were as well.

              “As the proprietor, you need to be extremely careful of such things.  Are you keeping the place clean?  It looks clean, but then how could that roach have ended up in that scone if you were keeping it clean?”

              I nodded my head furiously.  “I swear, we are keeping the place clean.” I wanted to tell him the story of the roach hole, just to prove that it wasn’t our cleaning abilities there were the problem, but somehow I doubted it would give him a warm fuzzy feeling.

              “Well, it’s not like we can just let this go.  I will have to talk to a lawyer about this.  And of course we’ve already notified the health department.  I suppose if they give you a clean bill of health there isn’t much else that can be done.  Other than the lawyer, of course,” he said.

              Roach lady just stood behind him with her arms folded across her chest, not saying a word.

              I just stared at him.  I felt like I couldn’t agree with him about getting a lawyer because that was like admitting guilt.  Even though we were guilty, I didn’t want to admit it.  At least not right now.  That’s what I had learned from television programs.  I couldn’t recall exactly which television program had taught me that, but I know I saw it on television.

              “You will most likely be hearing from our lawyer,” he said.  “Good day.”

              I stood and watched him leave.  His wife turned around and gave me a rather mean nasty look before following him out.

              I turned around and saw the two customers that had been quietly enjoying their coffees get up and follow the couple out. I went and sat back on the sofa and cried.

              “Come on Tara. Don’t do this,” Matt said softly.  “I know it’s been a rough couple of days, but you can do this.  We can do this.  We don’t have to let this get the best of us.”

              “I know Matt, but I just wanted this place to be this awesome dream.  And now it’s turning into a nightmare.”

              “I don’t think they’re going to do anything. They’re bluffing,” Janey said.  She had been silent up until then.

              “What? What do you mean?” I asked, turning to her. 

              “Who brings their husband in to check out the place like that?  I mean, you would just go straight to a lawyer, wouldn’t you?  Why the drama?”

              “I don’t know.  He seemed very serious.”  I said.  To be truthful, he had a very mobster like feel to him.

              “No, I don’t think so.  I mean, you can worry about it if you want to, but I just don’t think so.”

              She seemed so sure of herself.  I liked Janey more and more every day.  But I wasn’t sure I was going to be able to have the confidence that she had about this situation.

              “I agree,” Kathryn said, coming to sit beside me.  “Why come in here and do that?  I mean, thank goodness he wasn’t hysterical like his wife was.  Not that I blame her for being hysterical. I might have gotten a little hysterical myself had I found a roach in my scone.  But it was kind of weird.  Like maybe he wanted to scare you.”

              “Maybe he will ask for some money.  You know, instead of taking it to court,” Jillian said. 

              “Do you think so?” I asked.  “Should we give him some?  You know, like to keep him from making it worse?”

              “No!” they all said in unison. 

              “We aren’t encouraging that type of behavior.  We don’t want the whole city coming in here and saying they found a roach in their scone.  We would be out of business in a couple of hours,” Kathryn said.

              “We still might be,” I said softly.

              “Stop it.  We are not going out of business,” Matt said.  “Everything is going to be all right.  We are going to trust God in this,”

              I took a deep breath.  “Okay.  You’re all right.  We will trust God in this,” I said.  I needed to trust someone.  And right now, I knew that I couldn’t fix this.  Only God could.

              “I hope those last people that fled in terror don’t put it all on Facebook,” Jillian said absently.

              I looked at her.  “You’re not helping.”

              “Oh, sorry,” she said. 

              All I wanted was for this to turn out.  For this problem to go away.  I just didn’t know how to accomplish that.  I would have to let God handle it.  What choice did I have?

              “Jillian, maybe you should get in there and bake some more scones.  We are just about out,” Kathryn said.  Then she started laughing.  “But this time, use raisins instead of roaches.”

              We all stared at her.  “That’s not nice,” Jillian said, pooching her lip out.              Kathryn stifled her laughter.  “Sorry Jillian.  I was just trying to lighten the atmosphere.  I didn’t mean anything by it.”

              “Well, it’s not funny.  Well, sort of funny.  But really not,” she said.  “But I am going to go in there and bake something.  Just to show all of you that I am not a roach scone baker by choice.  I will make something without them.  You just watch.”

              And we did watch.  And there were no more roach scones.

CHAPTER TWENTY

              I was true to my word when I said that we would shut down the shop on Sundays.  We would disappoint the after church crowd, but how could they complain?  I mean, if we were Christians then we needed to do things the right way.  They got their Sunday off, and we needed ours.

              We were sitting in church, and I have to say, I felt a little jealous when I saw Nellie Mack doing the announcements.  She was good though.  Great execution.  She prayed afterwards and I really felt it.  Maybe I never was called to do the announcements?  Or maybe no one is and it’s just good that someone volunteers to do it.

              I looked around.  The church seemed to have grown while we were gone.  I felt bad.  I missed this place.  I missed the people.  Where was my conviction if I was willing to allow something as mundane as work draw me away?  I sighed.  I was never going to let that happen again.

              I looked over at Kathryn and smiled.  She looked like she was thinking the same thing I was.  It was good to be home.  The pastor’s sermon was awesome and made me feel reinvigorated in my faith.  I loved this place.  The only thing missing was Matt.  I wished he would come to my church.  But he had been at his nearly all his life.  How could I ever convince him to change?  I needed to at least invite him.  I missed him.

***

After church Matt and I took a walk.  Even though we were constantly on our feet at work, it was good to get some exercise.  I had been eating more than my share of Jillian’s baked goods and my body was feeling it.

              Matt held my hand as we headed toward the park six blocks away from where we lived.  I loved it when he held my hand.  It always made me feel warm and tingly.

              “What are you thinking about?” he asked me as we walked in silence.

              I looked at him shyly.  “You.”

              “Really?  And exactly what is it that you are thinking?”

              “Oh, just how wonderful you are and how blessed I am that you are mine,” I said, smiling at him.

              “Well, I think I can say the exact same thing about you,” he said and squeezed my hand.

              “No, you’re awesomer than I am,” I said.

              “Nope, not true.  You’re awesomer.”

              “No, you’re the awesomest,” I said.  Yeah, I know. Gag.  But I didn’t care.  We could go on like this all day.

              “Okay, you’re right.  I’m the awesomest,” he said.

              I laughed. I wanted moments like this to go on forever.  If there was some way to slow down time and jut stay here, I wanted to know how to do it.

              I was still worried about roach lady and her husband coming back to sue us.  Honestly, I almost didn’t blame them.  I would have thrown up if it had been a scone with a roach that I had bitten into.  I would have had to get tiny HAZMAT suits for each of my teeth and worn them before I ever ate anything ever again.

              “Now you’re being quiet,” he said, squeezing my hand.

              “I would think you would like that,” I said coyly.  I know how to be coy sometimes.

              “Nope.  I like hearing what you have to say.  I must say that at times, I’m quite shocked by it, but I still want to hear it,” he said.

              “I guess I do have a way with words,” I answered.  We sat on a park bench and looked out across the park.  The park was green and beautifully manicured.  The trees were so full and green. “It’s beautiful.  Sometimes God’s creation just takes my breath away.”

              “Mine too,” he said.  “I can hardly wait to see what He’s going to do next.”

              “I hope He’s going to get us out of trouble with this lawsuit,” I said soberly.

              “He will.  Let’s not talk about that.  Talking about it too much just makes you worry more,” he said, putting a finger under my chin and turning my face towards his.

              “Okay,” I said.  “What do you want to talk about?”

              “You.  And me,” he said.

              I smiled.  “My favorite subjects.”

              “I have been doing a lot of praying,” he began very seriously. 

              “And?” I said when he paused for a few moments.

              “I just, well I just feel like there’s more.  With God.  More that He wants for me.  For us.”

              “You mean more than Cup of Grace?”” I said, my heart sinking just a bit.  I don’t know why I felt like that when he brought this subject up, but I did.

              “Yes,” he said quietly.

              “You still disapprove, don’t you?”

              “I wouldn’t call it that.  I just…don’t you want more?”

              “Of course I do.  I want more,” I said.  What I wanted to say is that I wanted him.  I wanted him permanently.  It had been such a short period of time that we had been dating.  We were seeing each other on a daily basis, and yet it wasn’t enough.  I wanted him permanently.  I wanted all of him.

              “Me too,” he said.  “I want it all.  I want all God has for me.”

              “What does that mean to you?” I asked, a lump forming in my throat.

              “I think I’m called to ministry, Tara.  I feel very strongly about missions.  I keep thinking about traveling,” he finally said.

              There it was.  A missionary would be traveling all over.  Probably all over the world.  And here I was, tied down to Cup of Grace.  What did that mean for me?  Had I made a terrible mistake in what I was doing?  Had I missed God?  Or was it a mistake to be dating Matt?  Did God want someone else for me?  Someone else for him?  I had no idea.

              “I don’t know what to say to that,” I finally said.  “Where does that leave us?  I mean, if you’re out traveling the world?  Where does that leave me?”  I wanted to tell him that I wanted him in my life permanently.  But I knew I couldn’t go there.  Not yet.  I pled with him with my eyes in the diminishing light.  Didn’t he know how important he had become to me?  Had he no idea at all?

              “Tara,” he said gently.

              My heart began thumping wildly in my chest.  Was this it?  Was it over?  Had I been a fool believing that he felt the same way about me as I did about him?

              “Tara,” he said again.  “Don’t worry about those things.  Don’t you think God will work out the details?”

              I took a deep breath.  Thank you Father.

              “Okay,” I croaked.

              “I’m not saying that I am a missionary.  That I’m called to that.  I’m saying I have leadings that way.  Maybe I’m wrong.  Maybe I’m missing it.  I’m just saying, I would like you to be open to us discussing it.  I sometimes feel like you are a little, well, closed off to certain things.”

              “What?” I said.  “What do you mean closed off?  How can I be closed off?”

              That was the last thing I was expecting him to say.  I was open-minded.  Especially where he was concerned.  Wasn’t I?  Just because I didn’t want him traveling all over the world without me, didn’t make me closed minded, did it?

              “Well, maybe closed minded is the wrong term.  I mean, I just feel sometimes like you are cringing on the inside when I talk about certain things. Maybe I’m misunderstanding though,” he said, holding my hand.

              I opened my mouth, all set to refute what he had just said, and then…then I realized that maybe he was right.  I did have some fears where he was concerned.  I did feel like maybe God was calling him to something that didn’t include me.  And that scared me.  Really scared me.

              “Okay,” I finally said.  “Maybe you’re right.  Maybe I am a little closed-minded.  But do you have any idea why?”

              He shook his head no.

              I swallowed hard.  Did I dare say it?  Was I going too far too fast?  Or did I even care?  I mean, if he cared at all for me, and he did because he showed it every day, then he wouldn’t freak out if I told him how I felt about him.  I decided that I wanted to be open and upfront with him about it.  Even if it scared the pants off me.  Even if I made a terrible mistake and he said he wasn’t interested anymore.  Did I love him?  Probably.  Maybe.  Maybe not yet.  Maybe I was just well on the way to it.  And that was fine.

              I opened my mouth again.  “Because I really, really, care for you.  Deeply.  And I am afraid that God is leading you somewhere away from me.” There.  I had said it.  My heart was thundering in my chest so loudly I could hardly hear myself think.

              He smiled.  “Oh Tara.  I think He’s doing just the opposite.  I want nothing more than to spend more time with you and see where this relationship goes.  I’ve never been in a relationship where I felt like this.  Where I really wanted all that God has for me in it.”

              “Really?” I asked.  “Really?”  It almost seemed too good to be true.  I suddenly felt silly for feeling like I might lose him.

              “Yes,” he said and then he laughed at me and kissed me on the forehead.  “You are one silly, wonderful woman.”

              “Do you think I made a mistake?  With opening Cup of Grace?” I asked quickly.  “Tell me truthfully.”

              He sighed.  “No.  I don’t.  Who knows where that is going to lead?  Maybe it’s temporary.  Maybe it isn’t.  Just pray and seek God in it.  It’s already here.  Already open.  So why stress over it?  Just keep praying for His perfect will in your life.”

              I let out the breath I hadn’t realized I had been holding.  “I’m glad you said that.  Because honestly, I have been feeling like I made a big mistake.  And that I just keep making mistakes.  I mean, I knew it would be a lot of work, but somehow, I didn’t realize it would be this much work.  Maybe I’m doing something wrong?”  I turned and looked him in the eye.  “Maybe you were right.  I mean, what good is a coffee shop?  How on earth can that be something God would want?”

              “I don’t think you were wrong.  I don’t think you should stress over this.  Just see where it leads,” he said.

              “I suppose so,” I said.

              “You’re my little worry wart,” he said with a laugh.

              I rolled my eyes at him.  Worry wart indeed.