Lost Angel (24 page)

‘I know Ellen had to stop work, Percy, but I miss having her around,’ Gertie said.

‘It’s just as well you put your foot down or she’d have carried on working right into labour.’

‘Yes, I know, but I expect she’s still complaining.’

‘A bit,’ Percy said as his eyes swept around the grounds. They had come a long way since March, and it was now August. In just five months the nursery had taken shape. Gertie and Ellen had ordered stock, some being sold, but most were held back for propagating. Young trees had been ordered too, including fruit trees, but, with limited space, not as many as they would have liked.

Gertie had taken advice from a Ministry of Food inspector and, though reluctant at first, she had given over a large portion of the grounds to growing vegetables. There were still food shortages, and until they eased Gertie would sell what vegetables she grew to the Ministry at a fixed price.
Another man, Harold, had been taken on, an experienced gardener, and the vegetable plots continued to thrive. It was interesting to learn about growing them, but Percy still looked forward to the time when they could concentrate solely on flowers.

Maureen was walking towards them and Percy grinned. The Labrador puppy had put on a lot of growth, looking gangly now, and spotting them it bounded forward, tail wagging and tongue lolling as it reached them to bounce excitedly around Gertie.

‘You daft lump,’ Gertie cajoled as the dog reared up, planting both front paws on her chest.

‘Goldie, get down,’ Maureen ordered, but as usual the dog ignored her.

‘Down!’ Gertie commanded.

This time Goldie obeyed and Maureen frowned, saying, ‘Why won’t she do that for me?’

‘You’re not firm enough, that’s why.’

Percy hid a smile. When it came to firmness, Gertie had that in abundance, but he was used to her now. Underneath her brusque exterior he knew she had a heart of gold and not for one minute had he regretted coming to work for her.

‘How’s Ellen?’ Maureen asked.

‘She’s fine, but fed up with being at home.’

‘The baby will be here soon and then she’ll have plenty to do.’

‘Right, enough idle chatter,’ Gertie said. ‘Percy, check that the greenhouse is well ventilated and then make sure the outside plants aren’t showing any sign of pests, especially the roses. I’ve picked up another load of horse manure from the stables. Harold can tell you what he needs for the vegetable plots, and the rest can be bagged up for sale in the shop.’

Percy nodded, head down now as he walked towards the greenhouse. The mention of stables had brought Billy to mind and his teeth were clenched. Sheila had given birth to a boy in July, his parents coming to see them to break the news. Percy had seen the look on Ellen’s face, and for the rest of that weekend she’d been quiet. Until then, Ellen had seemed happy and he’d convinced himself that she was growing fond of him, but after that doubts had set in. Did she still want Billy? Despite what his brother had done, did Ellen still yearn after him?

The greenhouse was humid as Percy walked inside and he quickly opened more windows. The last thing they wanted was mould on the young stock and to make sure they were all right he checked them row by row, his mind still turning. Ellen was carrying Billy’s child, and what if the baby served as a constant reminder that his brother had been first – what if it looked like Billy?

Sweat beaded his brow as at last Percy walked
outside, fighting his feelings. Seeing Doug looking at a plot of roses, he tried to distract his mind and asked, ‘Is there a problem?’

‘I’m not inspecting them, just stretching my legs.’

‘Is your back playing up?’

‘It’s fine; in fact, it’s better than it’s been for a long time. What are you up to?’

‘I’ve got to check plants for pests and then bag up some horse manure for sale in the shop.’

‘Can I give you a hand?’

‘No, thanks, and anyway, if Hilda saw you doing any bending or lifting, she’d skin you alive.’

‘You’ve got that right, but what the eye doesn’t see…’

‘It’s up to you, but if your back’s feeling better the last thing you need is to strain it.’

‘I suppose I’ll just have to stick to sitting at the till, or propagating.’

‘If you ask me, building up stock is the most important thing and you’re doing that.’

Doug smiled. ‘You’ve missed your vocation, son. You should have been a diplomat. Oh, well, I’d best get back to the shop.’

Percy inspected the roses, thinking that if it wasn’t for his doubts about Ellen and the baby, he’d be a perfectly happy man. He got on well with Doug and Hilda; and though he didn’t mind living with them in the cottage, one day he hoped
that he and Ellen would find a place of their own.

He had dreamed of a full marriage once Ellen had the baby, children of his own, but now began to wonder if Ellen would ever see him as anything more than a friend.

‘Not long now, Ellen,’ Val said as the two of them sat in her back garden. ‘Our babies are nearly due.’

‘I hope you have yours first,’ Ellen said.

‘I doubt it. Your tummy looks lower and I think that’s a sign.’

‘Is it? I don’t feel any different – well, except for my bladder.’

‘My Bob can’t wait and the daft bugger suggested that I could move things along by going for a run around the village.’

Ellen chuckled. ‘Run! I can hardly walk, especially in this heat.’

‘Yes, that’s what I told Bob. Mind you, I expect Percy feels the same.’

Ellen feared the changes the birth of her baby would bring. Percy had been wonderful, she couldn’t deny that, but she still only thought of him as a friend. One thing still marred her happiness, and that was the thought of having to be a proper wife to Percy, something she dreaded and worried about in equal measures.

‘What’s up, Ellen?’

‘Oh, nothing,’ she lied. ‘I’m just a bit nervous about having the baby, that’s all.’

‘There’s no need. You’ll be fine, the baby will be fine and you’ll be in safe hands with Mrs Ainsworth from the village. She’s brought loads of babies into the world.’

‘Is that another one of your feelings?’

Val shrugged. ‘I just know you’re going to be all right.’

‘I think you’re wrong about everyone having spiritual gifts. I haven’t got any.’

‘My mum used to say they need developing, but I must admit that as much as I tried, I never could do healing. She told me that her mother, my grandmother, could foresee the future, rather like that woman you told me about who had that vision about your dad.’

‘I used to go to church yet they preached against things like that. I was once told that it was an abomination in God’s eyes, yet there were spiritual things happening in the congregation.’

‘My mother had a natural gift for healing and she helped a lot of people. Surely that can’t be wrong?’

‘I don’t see how it can be and, to be honest, I’m not sure what I believe in now. There are so many religions, all preaching different things. How are we supposed to know which is the right one?’

‘I’ve no idea. My mum taught me right from
wrong, encouraged me to help people and that’s all that matters to me. I believe in God, but in my own way.’

‘You sound like Percy and, as I asked him, what sort of way?’

‘I think we each have to find our own path. Yours once led you to the church, but mine didn’t. When the time is right you’ll find your path again, but until then it’s not up to me to lead you where you may not be meant to go.’

‘I know you’re twenty-five, but when you talk like that you seem so much older. You sound, oh, I don’t know, wise, I suppose.’

‘It was my mum who was wise, not me. I still miss her, especially now…with…with my baby close to being born.’

Ellen had never seen Val like this before, vulnerable, her eyes glistening with tears.

‘There I was going on about being nervous, but you must be too.’

Val sniffed then nodded. ‘I am a bit.’

‘Well, let’s hope you’re first then, and if you are, I promise I’ll be here to hold your hand.’

‘No, I won’t be first.’

‘It doesn’t matter; even if I’ve just had my baby, when you go into labour I’ll get here somehow, even if Percy has to carry me.’

‘You…you’d do that?’

‘Of course I will.’

A smile at last broke through. ‘Ellen, I’m so glad you moved into Lavender Cottage.’

‘So am I, and soon we’ll know if that pendulum was right.’

‘A girl for you and a boy for me. It’ll be nice, they’ll be able to play together, grow up together, and…’

The colour had drained from Val’s face, and nervously Ellen asked, ‘What is it? You didn’t finish what you were going to say. And what?’

‘It…it was nothing…nothing. The baby kicked hard and it took me by surprise, that’s all.’

‘Are you all right now?’

‘Yes, I’m fine.’

‘What were you going to say then?’

‘I can’t remember now,’ Val said dismissively and then glanced at her watch. ‘My goodness, look at the time. I’d better make a start on Bob’s dinner.’

Ellen frowned. Val wasn’t meeting her eyes, and she was sure that she was hiding something. ‘Tell me the truth. Did you have one of your feelings?’

‘No, no, I told you, it was just the baby kicking. Now I must get on, but I’ll see you tomorrow.’

‘Yes, all right,’ Ellen said as she reluctantly left. She was still sure that Val had felt something, that she was hiding something. But what?

Over a week passed and on Sunday Hilda was relishing her day off. She did some housework, lovingly dusted the angel ornament, and, though she knew it was probably foolish, she still felt that it somehow looked over them.

‘Thank you,’ she whispered before placing it back on the mantelpiece.

It was eleven o’clock now and, needing a break, Hilda picked up her knitting before going into the garden to sit next to Ellen. The sky was blue, bees buzzed among the flowers and she sighed happily, soon feeling lethargic; the knitting sitting unattended in her lap.

‘You look hot, Mum. You should have let me help.’

‘No, love, your ankles are swollen and you need to rest.’

‘I’m going in to get a glass of orange juice. Do you want one?’

‘You stay there. I’ll get it.’

‘It’s all right. My back’s aching and I need to stretch it out.’

Hilda watched Ellen as she walked inside, one hand resting in the small of her back. The baby would be born soon and Hilda smiled with pleasure at the thought, her grandson or granddaughter a summer baby. Ellen had told her about Val and the pendulum, how it had forecast a girl, but to her it sounded like nonsense. She had thought Val a bit strange from the start, but despite this Hilda had to admit that she liked their neighbour. Val might come out with some strange things now and then, but she was always pleasant, always smiling, and she and Ellen had become fast friends.

‘Here you are,’ Ellen said as she held out a glass of juice.

‘Thanks, pet. How are you feeling now? Does your back still ache?’

‘No, it’s eased off. It’s always the same if I sit too long.’

‘I’ve almost finished this now,’ Hilda said, picking up her knitting. ‘It’ll just need sewing together and then you can give it to Val.’

‘It’s good of you, Mum. I know she appreciates it that you’ve been knitting for both of us.’

‘The poor girl lost her mother when she was only twenty-one, and, anyway, with the amount of old jumpers and cardigans I managed to find at the jumble sale to unravel, I’ve got plenty of wool.’

‘Hello, it’s only me. I thought you’d be out here.’

‘Talk of the devil,’ Hilda quipped as she turned to see Val, her tummy huge like Ellen’s and her movements cumbersome.

‘I had a funny feeling and just popped along to see if I’m right,’ Val said, her eyes on Ellen.

‘Right about what?’ Hilda asked.

‘I thought Ellen might be in labour.’

‘No, I’m fine, so for once your feelings are wrong.’

‘Are you sure?’

‘I think I’d know if the baby was coming.’

‘Yes, I suppose so,’ Val said doubtfully. ‘All I’ve got is a backache.’

‘I thought you said it had eased,’ Hilda said sharply.

‘It had, but it’s back again now.’

‘Hilda, where’s Percy?’ Val asked. ‘He’s gone to the pub with Doug for a lunchtime drink.’

‘Right, I’ll send my Bob to get them, and on his way he can call in on Mrs Ainsworth. She’ll be needed soon.’

‘I don’t need Mrs Ainsworth. I told you, it’s only a backache,’ Ellen protested, but then bent forward, clutching her tummy. ‘Oh…oh…I’ve got a pain in my stomach now.’

‘I knew it. You
are
in labour.’

Hilda rose swiftly to her feet. ‘Come on, Ellen, let’s get you inside.’

‘Mum, I’m scared.’

‘Don’t be, Ellen, you’ll be fine,’ Val said. ‘I’m off to tell Bob now, and Mrs Ainsworth will soon be here.’

As Val waddled off, Hilda held Ellen’s arm and inside she urged her upstairs. Half way up, there was another wail, Ellen standing frozen as her waters broke.

‘Oh, Mum!’

‘It’s all right, it’s perfectly normal,’ Hilda said. Her daughter looked wide-eyed, so frightened, and for a moment Hilda almost panicked too. What if something went wrong? This was her daughter, her only child. She was sixteen, hardly more than a child herself and about to give birth.

Despite her fears, Hilda knew she had to hold herself together and now sought for something to give her strength.
Please, please let her be all right. Please, angel, watch over Ellen, keep her safe,
Hilda inwardly begged, and this time, for once, she didn’t berate herself for being foolish.

Ellen gave birth to a baby daughter at nine thirty that evening. She was exhausted, but held the baby tenderly, love shining in her eyes. ‘Mum, she’s so tiny.’

‘Born on the twenty-seventh of August, tiny but perfect. You’ll have to think of a name now.’

‘I already have. I’m going to call her Sarah.’

‘My mother’s name? Oh, Ellen, that’s lovely.’

There was a mist of tears in her mum’s eyes, but then Ellen looked away as Mrs Ainsworth came in, all bustling efficiency again.

‘Right, my dear, let’s get you cleaned up and then we can bring Sarah’s daddy up to see her.’

Ellen tried to smile, but it was difficult. It should be Billy looking at his baby daughter, sharing the love she felt, the bond. Instead it would be Percy, and how could he feel the same? How could he feel this overwhelming love for a child that wasn’t his own? It wasn’t right, wasn’t fair that her daughter would never know her real father and a father’s love. Regret now swamped her. She shouldn’t have done it – shouldn’t have agreed that Percy pass Sarah off as his own.

‘Here, I’ll take her.’

Ellen gently passed Sarah to her mother, saw how lovingly she held her, and felt a little better. Sarah might never know her father, but she had grandparents who would love her as much as she herself did. She lay back on the pillows, too tired to think about it any more. Her daughter had come safely into the world, just as Val had said and, for now, that was all that mattered.

Unaware of Ellen’s thoughts, Percy was still pacing. He had heard Ellen’s screams – screams that seemed to go on and on until at last there was the small cry of a baby. Since then, nothing!

‘Doug, what the hell’s going on up there? Why is it taking so long?’

No sooner had Percy asked the question than Hilda appeared, with a wide smile on her face.

‘Well, Doug, we’ve got a granddaughter.’

‘A girl, that’s nice. What about Ellen? Is she all right?’

‘She’s fine.’

Mrs Ainsworth came downstairs now, a smile on her face.

‘Congratulations, Percy, you’ve got a beautiful baby girl. You can go on up to see her now.’

‘What about me?’ Doug protested.

‘Let Ellen and Percy have a little time on their own first,’ Hilda said.

Percy found his heart thumping in his chest. A girl, Ellen had had a daughter – but what if she looked like Billy? He found Ellen looking at the baby, but she looked up as he nervously approached the bed. Her smile was radiant and, despite the exhaustion etched on her face, he had never seen her looking more beautiful. For a moment words caught in his throat, but then he managed to stammer, ‘How…how are you?’

‘I’m fine,’ she said, ‘but look, Percy, isn’t she lovely?’

Gingerly he sat on the side of the bed and, as Ellen pulled the swaddling to one side, Percy gazed at the baby. She was tiny, her face screwed
up and cute little lips puckered as though about to cry. He couldn’t see anyone in her, not Ellen, not Billy; in fact, he thought with a smile, if anything she looked like a sweet, red-faced little monkey.

‘I’ve called her Sarah, after my grandmother. I hope you don’t mind?’

‘Of course I don’t,’ he said, reaching out to stroke the baby’s tiny, outstretched palm, amazed when her fingers curled around his. Percy felt a sudden surge of protection that was so strong it almost took his breath away. It was a magical moment, and though she was his niece, Percy at last knew that he would be able to see Sarah as more than that, much more.

‘Hello, sweetheart,’ he said, smiling softly. ‘I’m your daddy and I’m gonna love you to bits.’

There was a choking sob and, surprised, he saw that Ellen was in tears. ‘What is it? What’s wrong?’

With a watery smile, Ellen said, ‘Nothing. .. nothing at all. Everything is just perfect.’

As Sarah let go of his finger, Percy leaned forward to kiss Ellen’s cheek and then for a while the two of them just gazed at the baby, until at last Percy said, ‘I’d better tell your dad he can come up.’

‘Yes, and no doubt my mum will be with him. We’ll have to watch it, Percy, or the pair of them will take this baby over.’

‘Maybe it’s time to find a place of our own.’

Ellen was quiet for a moment, but then said, ‘Yes, I’d like that, but don’t say anything to Mum and Dad yet.’

‘Don’t worry, I won’t, and anyway, it might take us a while to find something we can afford, a place that’s close to the nursery,’ Percy said, then reached out to gently touch the baby’s cheek. ‘I won’t be long, but it’s time for you to meet your granddad.’

Ellen was smiling as she watched Percy leaving the room. She’d been silly, worrying about nothing. As soon as Percy saw the baby, it was obvious he was smitten and she was sure now that his love would grow. When she’d seen the look on his face, the amazement when Sarah clutched his finger, something had stirred in her heart. Percy had committed himself to taking care of her and Sarah, and deserved more than a wife who couldn’t love him.

Could she? Could she open her heart to Percy? He was such a good man, but she had only seen him as a pale shadow compared to his brother. She’d been blinded by Billy’s looks, had ignored his nature, but now knew how stupid she had been.

Yes, Ellen decided, she would try – try to love Percy – and as she liked him so much, surely that was a start.