Losing You: a prequel to It's Not Over (9 page)

To me that’s permission to continue, which I had every intention of doing.  The end goal to have the warmth wetness of her stroking against me while screaming my name helped me to control the eagerness.  I definitely had this in the bag if she already called out my name.  Now it’s time to get serious.  I pulled myself from her grip and slowly kissed her down the middle as I made my way south.  Only pausing at her belly button to drive her a little mad as I devoured her there.  Both of her hands gripped my hair.  Not wanting to wait another second to see her next reaction I made my way to the sweetness of her core and planted a full open mouth kiss.

Pushing up to her elbows looking down at me with an uncertain expressing showing her disbelief of what I just did she scolded, “What are you doing?” 

Acting like the devil himself I dipped down only to run my tongue from her opening all the way to her clit keeping my eyes on her for the reaction.  Dropping her head back, falling to her back, her hands fisted the sheets when I licked up her clit to suck her flavors.  Naturally her legs opened to me as she raised her knees placing her feet to the bed she bucked upward at the sensation.  Needing to control her I wrapped my arms around her legs pressing her stomach down as I devoured her into ecstasy.  Her whimpers, her cry’s, and her moans all came out with my name on the end. 

“Paul, I need you now.”

Not yet baby, which I didn’t take time to tell her.  I continue my assault of the wet folds, her clit, and the core of her until her legs shook from pleasure.  Slowly I crawled up her as the rest of her body trembled against mine.  She’s mine all mine, all she has to do is say it.

My own pain of throbbing needed to be satisfied, but I had to hear the words.  “Are you sure you want to do this?”

Her word came out breathy, “Yes.”

Spreading her wide beneath me I rubbed against her core, “Tell me.”

The need in her voice came out pleading, “Please Paul.  I need you in me.”

I wanted to stay true to my promise to her father.  Still not the words I wanted to hear from her I asked, “Are you going to marry me?”

Jessica

Why did he have to make me come if he didn’t intend on finishing the job without telling him I would marry him?

He reached between us stroking me with his penis held in his hand.  He knew what he was doing and it drove me crazy.  Wanting him to fill me with his love before I explained the bomb I intended on dropping on him.  Reaching my arms around him to pull him tighter, hoping he wouldn’t be able to resist.  Taking the tip his penis and placed it against my opening without inserting he drove me mad.

That crazy devil grin came to his face as the pressure of him told me he is there and willing if I said the words.  If I told him no would he stop making love to me?  Finally breaking the silence he pushed, “Jessica, you have to tell me you will marry me.”

I bit my lip and dug my fingers into his butt pulling him to me, “Not yet, Paul, please.”

He took my hand and sucked on my ring finger searching for something with his other hand.  When he found what he reached for he slid his mouth from my finger.  He gazed at me with pleading eyes as he pushed a little further into me, driving me to want to beg him to do it.  I wanted to tell him I’m leaving and that he had to hurry, our time was limited.  He slid the ring on my finger, “Please tell me you will marry me?”  He pushed into me a little more and I gasp, “A year.”

He pushed harder almost in me.

“We can plan on a year?”

“Start planning in a year.”

He pushed into me as the tears escaped my eyes and trickled down the side of my face.  Waiting to see if it hurt being the first time for me his hands came to hold my face, “Does it hurt?”

I shook my head because it didn’t hurt, but my heart did.  He pushed to me again as his mouth came to mine deeply.  His tongue taunted me as he pushed to me again driving deeper with each stroke.   He moaned as he moved to and from me.  When he would pull away I wanted to beg him to push into me again, but by the time I would open my mouth he’d dive back into me.  Words escaped from him with his mouth on mine, “So warm.”

Yes, it’s warm, filling, and oddly good to me.  His movements became faster as he moaned more.  The tingling started in my toes and I gripped him tightly, but his release filled me as his body fell onto mine resting there.  His face came to my neck as he kissed, licked, and sucked.  I laid there realizing he’s done.  I traced my hands up and down his back wanting him to move to me more.  His lips came to my ear, “You didn’t come again did you?”

I smiled and turned my face to kiss him, “It’s good.”

He laughed with a sigh, “It’s not supposed to be good.”

I grinned as his face came to mine and he moved a little.  I raised my eyebrows as he slipped away from me.  We both giggled and kissed more as his body move to mine again.  His kisses still filled with need as our mouths moved together.  The tingling came back as he swelled inside of me.  I had to quit kissing him to breath and his hands came to my face to hold me to look at him as he stroked deeper and deeper.  The slower and deeper he went the tingling sensation increased.  I gasped and moaned a little.  The sound surprised me that it came from me and I closed my eyes with embarrassment.  His lips pressed against mine, “There, Jess.” diving deep hitting an area inside me that ignited with each stroke.  His rhythm easy to follow only increased my longing to have him in every way.  I nodded and gasped again.  Oh shit that noise escaped from chest this time.  His smile grazed my face as he concentrated more on moving the way that was making me moan in ecstasy.  Seeing the creases in his forehead grew with his concentration as he moved to me more determined.

It became too intense, “Paul, stop.”

He stopped pushing so hard but didn’t stop moving that way and I held my breath.

Gasping in between long torturous thrusts he blurted, “Are you okay?”

Something seemed to be happening to my body which I couldn’t stop so I nodded and shivered.  He went back to moving to me smiling as he stared into my eyes, “Jess, it’s supposed to be like this.”

When he pushed into me so slowly my body took over rising to meet him, tilting in a way that gave him deeper access to my core.  Each movement we made complimented each other as if our bodies took over craving more.  The mixed emotions over whelmed us as the tingling moved up my body and festered in my stomach.  It’s like swinging when you close your eyes and tip back to get that rush of tingling but only better because you had someone to share it with. 

Not being able to handle the pleasure tears filled my eyes his voice came deep and careful, “Jess, let it happen, please.”

I closed my eyes allowing myself to love him without all the clutter.  It became a different world to me as we moved together as one.  My movements complimented his as I dug my fingers into his skin.  I heard him moan and his body tensed even more.  He gasped with every movement into me and I made noises that didn’t sound like me at all.  He pushed hard to me and this amazing rush filled me causing me to erupt inside and scream out his name.  I gasped for air as his movement slowed the pleasure complete.  I came with him in me and it was better than I could ever imagine.  It wasn’t that way the first time, but he didn’t stop until I shared that experience with him.  I could do that every minute of every day if my body could handle it, only now I’m exhausted and my body limp and weary.  If I tried to move it would tremble everywhere.  His face rested next to mine his cheek caressing mine.  The sensation of his smile glided against my face while whispering, “That is how you make love.”

I moaned a yes and kissed his cheek.  His mouth came back to mine as we kissed softly, playfully, and loving.  His nose nudged mine while our lips consumed each other’s.  This urge to cry took over causing me to lose it.  I couldn’t stop the tears from coming and then a sob escaped me.  After making love to the man I am madly in love with why would I cry like this?  Our love is amazing and wonderful; I never imagined it could be so perfect.  I put my arm over my face to hide my embarrassment.  I didn’t want him to see me this way because I’m not sad at this moment.  I am so happy that it filled my heart with everlasting joy.

“Jess, why are you crying?”

I yelled with my squeaky voice, “I don’t know.”

He laughed slightly but then asked in a serious tone, “Did I hurt you?”

I shook my head and gasped for more air.  He moved to hover and I grabbed a hold of him to keep him here.

“What do you want me to do?”

I yelled again this time my voice cracked, “I don’t know.”

He moved to my side a little and traced his fingers over my face, “You know I love you?”

Still not being able to look at him I nodded.

“Tell me what you are feeling?”

Trembling with my tears I slowly got out, “Scared… Wonderful… Amazing… Happy… Confused.”

“Confused?”

“Yeah.”

“About me?”

Bellowing, “NO!  Why I’m crying.”

He laughed and pressed his lips to mine gently, “I heard this could happen.”

I lowered my arm to peek at him pleadingly.

“The first time; sometimes it’s so emotional when you love someone.”

“Great, you could have warned me.”

He laughed and kissed my face everywhere, “I love that you are like this.  You love me almost as much as I love you.”

Pushing him away I tried to roll away from him, but nodded to tell him I did love him as much as he loved me.

Holding me preventing me from escaping his embrace he whispered in my ear, “I have to tell you something.”

Pain seared my heart with fear.  Did this turn him off?  His hand gently pulled my face back to his gazing at me with the softest eyes, “Jess, remember when you wanted me to kiss you?”

Regaining my sanity I nodded, but I sniffled trying to control my tears.

“How you wanted me to be your first for everything?”

I nodded again taking a huge gasp of air and but it came out with quick breaths in, “Yes?”

“You are my first.”

Staring into his eyes I couldn’t quite get what he said.

“I have never been with anyone but you.”

“But, you had lots of girlfriends?”

He grinned, “Because I never wanted to do anything with any of them.  You are my first for everything…”  He shrugged his shoulders, “Except for kissing.”

Still wondering what exactly did he mean, “So, you never did this before with anyone?”

He shook his head as he pressed his lips to mine again.  I wrapped my arms around his neck and then my legs.  He pulled me close and rolled to his back with me laying on him.  I moved down and laid my head on his chest.  His kiss came to my head and the trace of his hand down my back comforted me.

We must have laid there for a long time and I rolled from him grabbing the sheet to pull around me.  He pulled back on them, “Hey.”

I pulled harder and ran to the door.

Reminding me he blurted out, “Matt is out there.”

I laughed but still snuck into the bathroom.  Pulling the sheet up to use the toilet the surprise came when I stood realizing the toilet filled with redness.  With hands trembling I cleaning myself with toilet paper and water, trying to rid myself from the blood that came from me.  I had no idea there would be so much from the first time.  In a daze moving from the bathroom to his bedroom not knowing how or what I would say to him.  As I got closer to him lying there naked, every part of his body ripped in muscles proving how perfect he is.  I definitely did not compare.  I sat down on the bed not saying a word.  His arm wrapped around me and pulled me back to him.  He traced his hand down my back lowering the sheet from me, “I wish you wouldn’t cover your body.  You are the most beautiful person I know.”

Not feeling very pretty right now I pushed him away.  Evaluating the situation he scooted up against the headboard and reached to pull me to him.  He cradled me against his chest, and I couldn’t refuse how amazing it felt to have his arms around me.  Wrapping my arm around his waist and rested my head to his chest completely curled into him.

His chest rose slowly and sank as air escaped his chest when he asked, “What’s wrong?”

A little embarrassed for yelling at him about this very thing a long time ago, it’s going to be a hard one to explain.

“Remember that time in your truck when we were messing around.”

The squeeze of his embrace came with a laugh as he said, “I remember lots of times when we messed around in my truck.”

Frustrated I huffed, “The time I yelled at you because you fingered me.”

He pressed his lips to the top of my head, “Yes.  You thought I broke your cherry and you didn’t want to lose it to fingers.”  Laughter escaped him as he remembered the scene.

This didn’t make me happy, so I reached up pulling his face to look at me, “I didn’t”

Laughter still filled his eyes, “Of course you didn’t”

Raising my eyebrows hinting at the situation.

“Oh…”  He breathed out as the realization came to him.  He pushed me forward, rearranged the pillows, gently laid me down on the bed.  When I was all tucked in he laid next to me propping his head in his hand to gaze at me.  His hand gently rubbed my stomach, “Are you in any pain?”