Lockdown (15 page)

Did it? He sure as hell hoped so. “I don’t know. How would you feel if we did?”

Jared started bouncing up and down in his seat. “Yeah! That’d be so cool. She’d be like my second mama.”

Jake smiled at his son’s enthusiasm. And to think he’d been worried. “How would you feel about coming to Brant to spend some time with us, since you’re out of school and all?” Given the fact that his ex-wife saw fit to leave their child with a baby sitter all the time, it shouldn’t be too difficult to sell a judge on the idea.

“You mean you and Jessie?”

“Yeah, us, and your Nana and Papa, the Carltons, Uncle Tuck, your auntie…” His cell phone buzzed, interrupting his conversation. Tucker. He could wait. The only person who couldn’t wait another second longer was Jessica.

“That’d be cool, Daddy. Can I come and live with you and Jessie?”

Nothing would make Jake happier than to have the woman he loved and his little boy under his roof, sharing his life, but he wasn’t about to make a promise he couldn’t keep. “I’d love that, but we’d have to try and work it out with your mama and the judge first.”

Jared’s face fell. “I don’t want Mama to think I’m mad at her.”

Jake hated knowing that his child had to suffer through that damn divorce, and as a result, he would always feel as though he was being pulled in opposing directions. They both wanted him, but the court would only award permanent custody to one of them. He prayed he was the one.

“Will you and Jessie have more babies when you get married?”

He never failed to be amazed by his son’s maturity. “Um, maybe. How would you feel about that, son?”

“That’d be awesome. I’d be a big brother, right?”

Jake grinned. “That’s right. You’d get to boss him or her around, teach them things, and take care of them. Think you could handle that?”

His head bobbed up and down. “I’d be real good at the bossin’ part.”

Jake chuckled. “You’re right about that, kiddo.” His future, the future he wanted, suddenly came into sharp focus. He just prayed he wasn’t too late.

Chapter Twelve

“What the hell do you mean she’s gone?” Tucker shouted. “You just let her leave?”

Jake felt the impact of those words settle over him as soon as he entered the Carlton house.
She’s gone.
Those two little words echoed in his head like a mantra, over and over again, until Jared tugged on his hand to get his attention.

“Who’s gone, Daddy?”

Jake was frozen, rooted to the spot. For the first time in his life, he wanted to run. Away from here, toward Jess, he didn’t know. He just knew he didn’t want to be here if she wasn’t. “Uh, I don’t know, buddy. Let’s go find out.” He needed some answers, now.

“Hey, y’all,” Jake said, entering the kitchen with his son in tow.

Lorna wiped her damp cheeks with the tissue from the pocket of her floral apron and forced a smile for Jared’s benefit. “There you are,” she said, holding her arms out to the little boy. “I’ve been waiting for you. I need your help picking some berries for dessert. Think you can help me with that, partner?”

He let his Nan Lorna sweep him up in his arms. “Sure can.”

“Good stuff. Let’s go.”

Jake listened to their animated chatter drift through the mud room. “What’s goin’ on?”

Merle glared at him. “Like you don’t know?”

Shit, they were blaming him for this. Of course they were. It was his fault their daughter left her home and loved ones behind. “I take it Jess left?” He looked at Tucker when Merle failed to respond. “Where’d she go?”

Tucker sank down into a kitchen chair, dropping his head into his hands. “I don’t know. She went to visit some friends.”

Visit. That didn’t sound as permanent as he feared. “But she’s gonna come back for the wedding, right?”

Merle crossed his arms, a scowl deepening the lines on his weathered face. “That’s a month from now. A hell of a lot could happen to a young girl traveling across the country by herself in that amount of time, you damn fool.”

Merle had never spoken a harsh word to him in all the years they’d known each other. Jake knew he had to make amends, and since Jess wasn’t here, he would start with her father.

Jake claimed the chair next to Jessica’s father. “Listen, I feel terrible about this. You have to know, I didn’t want her to go. Hell, I damn near begged her to stay.” But his conscience reminded him that he still hadn’t said the three little words she needed to hear.

“Tell me something…” Merle said, crossing his arms over his ample stomach. “What the hell is wrong with my little girl? She ain’t good enough for you, or what?”

Jake couldn’t believe what he was hearing. Her father
wanted
them to be together? He always assumed their age difference, life experience, his divorce, and child would work against him with Jess’s family. “Merle, your daughter is the most incredible woman I’ve ever met.”

He snorted. “You sure got a funny way of showing it. Is that why you married that
—
”

Tucker gripped his father’s forearm. “Dad, stop. Diane is the mother of his son. You keep your opinions about her to yourself.”

Jake knew Merle wasn’t accustomed to keeping his opinions to himself. The outspoken mayor was always in the midst of a debate with the members of their community. A typical politician he was not, but everyone knew he would fight with his last breath for Brant, so they continued to re-elect him, year after year.

“It’s okay; whatever you want to say to me, just say it. You know I can take it,” Jake said.

“You married that
woman
, who’s laid on her back for half the goddamn county, yet you were able to overlook my daughter, who’s been in love with you forever. I just don’t get it.”

Jake looked at Tucker. “You feel the same way?”

Tucker sighed as he ran his hands through his hair. “You’d have to be pretty dense not to realize she was in love with you, Jake.”

Jake looked back and forth between Merle and Tucker, trying to come to terms with the fact that he’d wasted so many years living without Jess in his life because he was afraid of the impact it would have on their families, only to learn they’d been waiting all that time for him to come to his senses.

“Why the hell didn’t you tell me how you felt?” Jake asked.

Tucker shrugged. “It’s your life. We didn’t want to interfere. We figured if you had feelings for Jess, you’d let us know.”

Jake dropped his head into his hands. He couldn’t regret his marriage to Diane, it gave him the best thing in his life, Jared, but when he thought of all the years of heartache he could have spared Jess, it turned his stomach. “I love her,” he said simply, knowing the time for subtlety had long since passed.

Merle and his son exchanged a glance. “Well, it’s about time.”

Jake smiled. “Merle, I’m crazy about your daughter. She’s everything I’ve ever wanted in a woman and so much more than I deserve.”

Merle nodded. “And? I’m waiting.”

Jake chuckled. “And I’d like to make her my wife, if I have your blessing?”

Merle stood up and extended his hand to Jake.

Jake accepted it gratefully. Now that he had Jess’s family’s support, he just had to beg her forgiveness. He would do or say anything to prove to her how sorry he was for letting her believe that he didn’t care. Aside from his son, she was the only person in his life that mattered.

Merle grasped his hand and looked him in the eye. “I’ve watched you grow up, Jake McCoy. I’ve lectured you when you got into trouble with Tucker; I’ve been there to take pride in all your accomplishments, right alongside your mama and daddy. You’re a good man. I respect you more than I can say. You’re one hell of a daddy, and I know you’re going to be the kind of husband my little girl can count on.” He pulled Jake into a back-slapping hug. “Lorna and I have always considered you our son, now we’re just gonna be making it official.”

Jake swallowed the lump of emotion in his throat. Merle was a hard-ass. Jake had never heard him openly praise anyone, and after the way he’d treated his daughter over the years, he wasn’t sure he deserved his admiration. But he intended to spend the rest of his life making sure he earned it because Jessica deserved the best he had to give.

Tucker stood up and walked around the table. “I should kick your ass for putting my baby sister through the wringer like this.”

Jake braced himself. Tucker wasn’t above taking a shot at one of his friends if he felt he deserved it, and in Jake’s mind, it would be justified.

“But I won’t.” Tucker pointed at him. “But I’m telling you now, you ever do anything to hurt her like this again and I won’t hesitate to kick your ass.”

Jake chuckled. “You’re assuming you could.” And just like that, his best friend was back, not Jessica’s over-protective big brother, but the man who had been like a brother to him since they’d been playing with Tonka trucks.

Tucker drew him into a hug. “There’s no one in this world I’d rather have as my brother-in-law, Jake.”

Jake slapped his back. “Thanks, man. That means a lot to me.”

Tucker drew back to look him in the eye. “I know you guys are gonna be real happy together, and you know that’s all I’ve ever wanted for her, for both of you.” He smirked. “I’ve stood by and watched you make a hell of a lot of mistakes. It’s nice to see you finally getting it right.”

Jake smiled. “It’s nice to finally feel as though I’m getting it right.” And that’s exactly how he felt, as though everything in his life had been leading up to this point. He turned to Merle. “Okay, the first thing I need to do is track her down. What can you tell me?”

“Uh, not much.”

Jake frowned. “What are you talking about?”

He shook his head. “She said she didn’t want Tucker coming after her and dragging her back home.”

Tucker chuckled. “She’s a smart girl, that one.”

Jake didn’t see the humor in this. The woman he loved was out there alone and devastated because she believed he’d let her down, yet again. “Okay, so we’ll just track her bank cards and credit cards. She’s gonna leave a trail and…”

Merle shook his head. “No, she’s not.” He sighed. “She withdrew the money she saved for the down payment on the condo. She said she didn’t want to go into debt to finance the trip and she wouldn’t need the money for the down payment anymore.”

Panic, cold and hard, started to grip Jake. “Let me get this straight. You’re telling me that she’s traveling alone with thousands of dollars on her and I have no way of finding her?”

“She said she’d email us. She promised we could reach her on her cell,” Merle said.

Jake whipped his cell phone out of his pocket and pressed the first number in his contacts. Ironic that he’d subconsciously given her the top spot without even realizing the significance of the gesture at the time. He waited, listening to the ominous ringing, and prayed. “It went to voice mail,” he said, setting his phone down on the kitchen table. He started pacing, trying to formulate a plan. He was a cop. He’d dealt with dozens of missing person cases in his career. But this was personal. This was
his
Jessica.

“Calm down, man,” Tucker said, stepping into his path. “She’s gonna come back for Ava’s wedding.”

Jake stared at his friend, unable to believe he could even think that he’d be willing to wait a month to see her, talk to her, and make love to her. There’s nothing he wouldn’t do to make this right. For a man who had self-respect to spare, groveling was sounding better with every moment that slipped by.

“Are you crazy, Tucker? Merle’s right, we both know what could happen to a young girl traveling by herself with a wad of cash.” Jake ran his hands through his hair, trying to still the pounding in his head. He didn’t have time for a headache; he had to be able to think clearly.

“Okay, we’ll trace her cell phone, find out which towers it’s bouncing off.” Tucker pulled his cell phone out of his pocket.

“It’s Saturday. You really think you’re gonna get any answers today?” Jake asked.

“I’ll call in a favor.” Tucker pointed to an empty chair. “Just sit down and try to relax. Jesus, you’re making me nervous.”

He couldn’t help it. He was a cop and his instincts rarely led him astray. Right now, his gut was telling him that he may have lost Jess for good. He sunk down in the chair, trying to draw breath. His chest was painfully tight. His head hurt. His whole body ached.