Little Blackbird (16 page)

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Authors: Jennifer Moorman

Tags: #southern, #family, #Romance, #magical realism, #contemporary women, #youth

BOOK: Little Blackbird
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“I’ll meet up with y’all later,” Kate promised as she jumped out of her parents’ car and ran up the path leading to the Lees’ front porch.

An hour later, Martha, Betsy, Charlotte, and Kate piled into Charlotte’s blue Cadillac. The radio blasted so loudly that the windows rattled in their frames, and the girls sang along with Buddy Holly at the top of their lungs. Kate smiled so widely that her cheeks ached.

Kate wore the same blue dress Martha had given her days ago, and her daddy had even bought her a new pair of black ballet flats. She’d nearly cried when she opened the shoebox and saw them shining beneath white tissue paper. She clicked her heels together and thought about Geoffrey and about what his reaction to her new look might be.

Charlotte pulled into the field that hugged one side of the carnival. The barren field acted as a makeshift parking lot for the crowd. The girls climbed out and straightened their clothes and checked their makeup in the side-view mirror. Martha twirled and watched her blurry striped reflection spin in the car’s paint. Charlotte spritzed on perfume and tossed the bottle into the front seat.

“Let’s go,” she said with a wave.

Long before they paid the admission fee, received handfuls of pink tickets, and entered through the arched gateway into the carnival, Kate smelled popcorn, melting sugar, and hot frying oil. Colorful lights twinkled and pulsed all around her. The Ferris wheel looked like a circular rainbow of color twirling round and round against the starry night sky. A multitude of sounds peppered the air—laughter, the pipe organ music of the carousel, shouts, carnival workers calling people to their rides and booths, ringing bells. When she entered into the carnival, Kate spun around in a complete circle as she’d always done as a child, trying to take everything in all at once.

Charlotte grabbed her arm and tugged her. “Come on, Kate. Sally is already here, and so are the guys.”

Geoffrey, Matthias, and Mikey sat at a game booth firing water pistols into the mouths of clowns while the clown hats rose higher and higher in a race to the top. The guys taunted each other, and when Kate heard Geoffrey’s laughter, her heart squeezed. Sally sat on the stool next to Matthias, but she wasn’t playing the game with them. Instead, she sat pulling spun sugar from a ball of cotton candy that looked like a fluffy pink balloon on a cardboard stick. Ted and John smoked cigarettes off to the side of the booth while watching to see who’d win the game.

Ted looked away from the clowns and noticed the girls. He dropped his dying cigarette onto the dirt and snuffed it with the toe of his shoe. “Check out this bunch of beauties.” He ogled them.

Martha leaned over Geoffrey’s shoulder. “Who’s winning?”

He glanced up at her and then cursed as his clown hat lost momentum. “I was until you distracted me.”

Martha laughed and shoved his shoulder. Matthias’ clown hat set off a whirl of alarms and blinking bulbs as it reached the top first.

Mikey replaced his water gun into its holster. “Matt, did it ever occur to you to let someone else win?”

Matthias grinned. “Never.”

The booth operator handed Matthias a stuffed koala bear with marble-size black eyes and a red bow tie. Matthias quickly passed the prize to the nearest girl, Charlotte. Her shock faded into a sweet smile, and she gazed at him. Kate recognized the longing in Charlotte’s eyes, but Matthias was looking at Kate, and she fidgeted beneath his intense stare.

Kate peered down to make sure her dress was presentable and her shoes weren’t disgusting from walking through the field. When she glanced up, Matthias still watched her with knit eyebrows. Kate looked away and saw Geoffrey scanning the group.

Geoffrey scowled at Martha. “I thought y’all were bringing Kate.”

“They did,” Matthias said, elbowing Geoffrey in the ribs and nodding toward Kate.

She attempted a genuine smile and lifted her hand in a small wave. Geoffrey’s thick eyebrows rose on his high forehead.

“Oh my
God
,” he said, crossing the center of the group and standing in front of her. He grabbed both of her hands and then spun her around. “Would you look at you?” He laughed and she blushed. “You look so
different
.”

Kate stopped spinning and looked at him wide-eyed, holding her breath. “Different good?”


God
, yes,” he said.

Betsy nudged Geoffrey. “Doesn’t she look like Ava Gardner?”

Geoffrey nodded his head. Disbelief dilated his pupils, rimming them with a thin line of green. “You could be her twin. Her
better looking
twin.” He touched Kate’s hair. “I like this.”

Kate smiled at the ground, shivering as his hands slipped through strands of her curls.

Martha stomped over. “Come
on
. Are we going to stand here all night or are we going to ride something?”

Ted hooked one arm through Martha’s. “Only if you’re my riding partner.” He pulled a silver, monogrammed flask from his shirt pocket. “Pick me up?”

She grinned up at him, batted her eyelashes, and uncorked the flask. She swigged it and then returned the flask to Ted. “Let’s go.” She tossed her blonde hair over her shoulder. “Are y’all coming or not?” She and Ted walked off, pushing a path through the crowd.

“Shall we?” Geoffrey asked, and Kate nodded.

They found Martha and Ted standing in line for the House of Mirrors, and the rest of the group filed in behind them. Geoffrey grinned down at her.

“What?” Kate asked, smoothing her hand down her hair.

“You,” he said, leaning his face toward hers. “You look amazing. I really want to kiss you.”

Kate shook her head, but she was smiling at the ground. She glanced up at him. “Not here.”

He nodded toward the fun house. “Inside?” He leaned closer and whispered, “Should I add it to the list?”

John pushed his flask into Geoffrey’s shoulder, and Geoffrey looked away from her. He took the offered drink, swilling it. He offered the flask to Kate, but she shook her head. The pungent scent of alcohol floated around them before the next breeze snatched it away.

“Want something to drink? A Coke?” Geoffrey asked. “Looks like we’ll be in this line for a little bit.”

“Sure.”

He leaned down and kissed the top of her head before hurrying off toward the nearest concession stand. Corn kernels burst out of large vats and filled glass machines with buttery fluffy popcorn. Hotdogs rotated beneath heat lamps. The sizzle of frying dough beckoned people from every direction. A red balloon, released by a young girl, drifted into the night sky, and Kate followed its ascent until the darkness absorbed it.

Betsy’s hair ribbon untied itself, and Charlotte paused in her conversation with Matthias to help retie the bow. Matthias turned to face Kate.

His blue eyes studied her. “New look?”

Kate shrugged. “I guess.”

Wrinkles creased his forehead, and his eyebrows drew together. “It takes a little bit of getting used to.”

A scream erupted from the House of Mirrors, and a group of high school kids stumbled out the exit, laughing and hitting each other.

She returned her attention to Matthias. His expression unnerved her. She clasped her hands together to stop herself from combing her fingers through her hair. “Why? It’s still me.”

“Is it?”

She glared at him, even though he’d voiced the same question she’d asked herself. “Of course. Just a better version.” Heat spread through her belly, and she adjusted her belt. She couldn’t meet his gaze.

Matthias shook his head. “A
better
version implies that the old version needed to be replaced, and I would disagree strongly with that idea.”

Kate’s irritation faded into wisps of surprise, circling in her chest. She stared at him. Before she could respond, Geoffrey pushed his way into line and grinned.

He handed her a cup filled to the brim with dark liquid. “One Coke with extra ice.” He held another cup out toward John. “Top me off, will you?” John poured liquid from his flask into Geoffrey’s cup.

Kate wanted to ask how much he’d had to drink, how much
all
of them had been drinking, but even the girls pulled hidden drinks from their bags, and Kate didn’t want to sound like the immature kid. She sipped her Coke, and so far, no one seemed to be acting in the ridiculous ways her mama had warned her about. Kate wondered if Evan had ever drank with them. Would he have thought this behavior was normal?

Kate always imagined alcohol turned people into strange creatures who yelled and cried and threw fine china at each other, but she’d never actually seen anyone drunk before. She finished most of her Coke by the time they moved to the front of the line, so she tossed the cup into the trash can.

A snaggletooth man asked for three tickets from Kate, and she handed them over with a hesitant smile. “Is it scary?” she asked him.

He grunted. “Not when you’ve seen what I have.”

Kate’s mouth formed a small “o,” and Geoffrey slipped his hand into hers as they entered the House of Mirrors. Warbling music blared inside the first shadowed room, sounding as though the record player had become seasick. The floor pitched at an awkward angle, and the ceiling lowered, so they walked bent over. Soon, they were crammed into a narrow hallway that spilled out into an octagonal room with black walls and twinkling lights on the ceiling. The doorway closed behind them as they entered. The sounds changed as they entered different spaces, and this music reminded Kate of an icy wind blowing through wind chimes.

The room appeared to have no doors, which meant no way out. Kate’s heartbeat gained momentum, and soon she felt the rapid pulse in her fingertips. Ted and John began moving their hands along the walls.

“There has to be a hidden door,” Martha yelled over the music. She moved toward the nearest wall and slid her hands over the smooth surface.

While everyone was busy touching the walls, Geoffrey pulled Kate across the room and away from the others. In the twinkling lights, he looked down and winked at her. He motioned with his head toward the back wall and leaned toward her.

“I remember this room.” He placed his hands on the wall and pushed. It cracked open, and Kate’s eyes widened. “Come on.”

“What about the others?” Kate asked, trying to look over her shoulder. But Geoffrey pulled her through the opening and the wall closed behind them.

Geoffrey and Kate stood on a small landing. Through an archway she saw walls of mirrors framing concentric, circular floor panels that spun in slow, lazy circles meant to confuse the patrons. Each floor panel moved in opposite directions, so they created a circular maze of mirrors and passageways. The room was completely devoid of sound, and the silence startled Kate.

“Don’t worry about the others. They’ll find their way,” Geoffrey said. He tugged her against him. “Plus, I’ve been wanting to kiss you all night. Who wouldn’t? You look like a movie star.”

Geoffrey’s mouth was warm, and she tried to ignore the hint of sour left behind by the alcohol. She lifted up on her tiptoes and pressed herself closer to him. He slid one hand up the back of her neck and into her hair. She fisted his shirt in her hands. When she opened her eyes, she saw hundreds of Kates and Geoffreys kissing each other in the spinning mirrors. They were surrounded by themselves, lost in the moment. Just when she was sure she could kiss him forever and when she felt her logic on the verge of completely escaping, Geoffrey pulled away.

He shoved his fingers through his hair. “
God
, I missed that. I can’t imagine not being able to kiss you whenever I want.”

She smiled into his chest. “You can.”
Forever
.

He kissed down the side of her neck, and Kate shivered. “Whenever I want?”

She closed her eyes and sighed. “Yes.”

The wall behind them swung open and knocked into Kate and Geoffrey. Matthias stepped through, followed by the rest of the group.

Martha fisted her hands on her hips. “
There
you are. You could have told us you found the door.”

Geoffrey grinned. “We just got in here.”

Martha lifted an eyebrow. “Looks like you got in here long enough to have lipstick smeared on your face.”

Geoffrey laughed and wiped the back of his hand across his mouth. Kate stared at the berry stain on his hand, and she reached up her fingertips to her lips. Matthias stepped onto the first revolving platform and disappeared behind a wall of mirrors. Kate eyes widened, but she followed him with Geoffrey right behind her.

The spinning floor disoriented her immediately. She stumbled and watched herself stagger from twenty different angles. She saw Matthias in the reflection, but she couldn’t see him in person. Soon, she saw everyone’s reflections spinning around her as they stepped onto the platform. Their voices filled the void of silence and echoed.

Through openings in the mirrored walls, one by one, the group disappeared, and Kate spun alone on the platform, watching multiplied versions of herself staring right back at her. But her reflection looked like a stranger—a more mature, prettier girl who only faintly resembled the sixteen-year-old Kate who ran around barefoot in the grass wearing patchwork skirts.

In the distance, Matthias appeared. Hundreds of him moved closer and closer to her. It was impossible for her to tell from which direction he approached her. She swayed on the platform. Then he stepped through one of the doorways. His hand reached out and closed over her forearm, stabilizing her.

“Lost?”

Kate shook her head and smiled. “Sent to rescue me?”

Matthias chuckled. “I wasn’t aware you needed saving.”

She watched their reflections turn round and round and then watched her reflections smile. “Even if I did, I wouldn’t admit it.”

Matthias laughed again and tugged her toward a doorway. “Geoffrey can’t stay in this section too long. It makes him motion sick. He sent me to find you.”

They wove their way through the moving mirrored walls until they stepped through one final opening into a room full of a different sort of mirrors. There was a mirror that reflected a tall, paper-thin Charlotte, and a mirror that made Sally’s head swell to the size of a beach ball. There was a mirror that made Kate look as though she had been flattened and crafted into an accordion and one that widened Martha’s girth so much that she squealed and scurried off. Geoffrey stood in front of a mirror that shaped him like an hourglass, and he laughed, filling the room with the sound. He motioned for Kate to come over. They alternated between squatting and rising up on their tiptoes, distorting their bodies.

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