Life of the Party (17 page)

The songs were
good, but he made them better. The whole band really made the show,
but I couldn’t look at any of the others. My eyes were only for
Grey. Charlie was standing next to her chair, at times she would
jump and cheer and wave her arms in the air with the rest of the
crowd. But I could merely stare—stare and fall madly, impossibly
more in love with Grey at each strum of his guitar strings. My
heart belonged to him and no one else.

The ecstasy was
hitting me with full force. I nearly staggered with delight as
waves of euphoria crashed sweetly over me. I wanted to dance and
run and yell with pleasure, but instead I stood and smiled, smiled
up at the man I loved, pouring into my smile all the joy that
overflowed from somewhere deep inside of me. As if I was beckoning
him, Grey turned suddenly, and he looked around until he found me,
and then our eyes locked. His beautiful blue eyes met mine with
such force that I couldn’t breathe. It was as if he were seeing
into my soul, his gaze was so intense, so powerful. We stared at
each other, and I tried to pour into my expression everything I was
feeling. How he was making me feel, what I felt for him, what I
would do for him. I don’t know what Grey saw there reflected in my
face, but his lips curved into a smile—his sexy smirk, and then he
turned away from me, singing into the mike. He hadn’t missed a
beat; I doubt our moment lasted as long as it felt. But I was
trembling.

The rest of the
set was a blur; I don’t even know how much longer it lasted. I was
seeing lights before my eyes and had to sit to keep from falling
over. There was a cigarette non-stop between my fingers and my legs
shook with pent-up energy. The ecstasy was intense, perhaps
strengthened by the sheer force of my emotions. Or it could’ve been
the steady diet of booze and blow I’d survived on for the last
twenty-four hours … or maybe because I really couldn’t remember the
last time I’d eaten. Whatever the reason for the intensity, I just
focused on Grey as much as I could, a smile still bending my lips
even as my teeth chattered uncontrollably.

“Whooooo!”
Charlie screamed again, turning away from the stage as the lights
finally dimmed and the guys made their way off through the
curtains. She faced me and smiled.

“Wasn’t that
wicked? Whooo!”

“Awesome.” I
agreed wholeheartedly. “Totally awesome.” The house music started
up again now that the band was done, Destiny’s Child,
Survivor
. The beat made me want to dance. I tapped my feet
impatiently underneath the table.

“This hitting
you yet?” Charlie wondered. Her pupils were as big as saucers even
in the dim lights.

“Um … I would
say … yeah ….” I giggled and trembled. I grit my teeth. “Are my
eyes as big as yours?”

“Uh … hard to
say … let me take a look at my own eyes and I’ll let you know.” She
stuck her tongue out at me and laughed. I giggled with her, almost
hysterically, totally giddy. “They are pretty huge though,” she
continued, “and your eyes are so dark anyway, now they look almost
black.”

“Really?”

“Yeah.”

I laughed. “Do
I look like a freak?”

“No. It’s sexy.
Just don’t look the bouncers or bartenders right in the eyes,
though. That always tips them off.”

“Oh, okay.” I
would try to remember that.

“You wanna get
a drink? I think the waitress is coming around now that the guys
are done.”

“Yeah. A
rye-Coke.” I decided. I vaguely remembered the night I had come to
the Aurora with Riley, when he made me promise not to drink
anything since I was on ecstasy. I shrugged the dim memory off.
Riley could go screw himself. Charlie ordered our drinks and I lit
a cigarette. If Riley really cared, he wouldn’t be moving away
forever without even telling me. He’d be here, with me, telling me
not to drink.

“So what do we
do now?” I wondered, as our drinks were set before us on the round
black table. Charlie swept hers up immediately and took a sip.

“I feel like
dancing.” She decided suddenly, her eyes lit up. I nodded my head
at her perfect idea.

“Me too!” I
smiled excitedly and grabbed my jug of rye and Coke. “Let’s
go.”

“Let’s do it.”
She grinned and stood gracefully from the stool. I let her go in
front since she had more experience pushing her way through the
impossible maze of tightly packed people. Finally we made it,
bursting into the only small open space available on the dance
floor. It was ours though, and we made use of it. Charlie was a
good dancer; she was a ton of fun to be with, totally confident.
The smile never left my lips as we danced, and smoked, and drank
our way into near oblivion.

“Here you guys
are!”

“Zack!” Charlie
exclaimed at the sound of his voice. She smiled and went to him,
throwing her arms around his neck and kissing him enthusiastically.
He chuckled in response. I wondered how much of this show was for
the other girls surrounding the dance floor, kind of a personal
“hands off” message from Charlie. I laughed.

“I’ve been
looking for you everywhere.” He grasped Charlie’s hand and motioned
for me to follow them. I nodded and took Charlie’s other hand which
she outstretched to me. Together the three of us wound our way
through the crowded club until we made it to the VIP section in the
back. It was so much different stepping through the door this time,
now I knew nearly everyone in the room except for new random
groupies. I smiled at everyone I saw.

Natasha, Tracy
and Lori had taken the beat up leather couch in the center of the
room—they looked generally happier than they had the other night. I
still didn’t know who they belonged to. Tom was leaning against the
wall in a thick leather coat talking to two other men about his
age. He nodded at me. Lucas and Jimmy were settled at the bar with
girls surrounding them on either side. They clinked some shots
together and then threw them back to the delight of all the
women.

I followed
Charlie and Zack, but I was looking only for Grey. In my
mid-alcohol-ecstasy haze I suddenly wondered if he were even real.
What if I had imagined him? Really, could that much perfection
really exist?

Yes, it could.
I watched then as Grey and Alex stepped out of the little back room
that adjoined the VIP section. I knew now—because I knew them—that
they’d been doing blow back there. Like they probably had been the
first night I came.

I shook my hair
back and suddenly wished for a mirror. I had been dancing and
sweating, I hoped my make-up hadn’t melted off.

“Charlie.” I
whisper-hissed at her. I couldn’t take my eyes off Grey. “Do I look
okay?”

She turned and
gave me a discreet once over. Then a smile crept over her lips.
“You look fucking hot, Mackenzie. Go knock him dead.”

I laughed at
her. “Did I mention I love you?”

“Go.” She
smiled and gave me a little push. Grey and Alex were now in the
center of the room, around the group of people settled on the thin
leather couches and chairs. He hadn’t noticed me yet, or maybe he
had and was ignoring me. Either way, I didn’t want to go right to
him. I brushed my hair back and walked towards the bar, conscious
of my tight fitting black dress, the tall leather boots that hugged
my calves. I hoped Charlie had been telling the truth. I wanted to
be hot; I wanted Grey to want me.

I ordered a
drink, sudden butterflies in my stomach. The waitress plunked the
rye and Coke before me. I thanked her and took a sip. I knew the
moment I turned to look behind me that Grey and I would see each
other, but the anticipation was like a drug. I took a deep breath,
lit a smoke, and finally turned around, leaning my back on the
bar.

It was instant.
I could feel his eyes on me before I met them. Grey’s gorgeous face
was caught in an expression of amazement that betrayed his normal
cool. His blue eyes were wide, his mouth open slightly. I delighted
in his reaction and watched as his gaze swept over my body, slowly,
as if he were savouring every moment. My pulse began to beat
rapidly, even faster than before. I bit my lip and looked at him,
met his eyes when at last they returned to my face. He had composed
himself by then, his expression slipping easily back into the calm,
collected Grey that he showed everyone. But it was too late; I
already knew the effect I had on him. I had seen the evidence in
his face.

I smiled
gloriously and took a drag of my cigarette.

“Hey,
Mackenzie, right? Can I have one of those?” Jimmy disrupted our
moment, shouting at me from his spot just down the bar. I turned my
smile to the young faux-hawked man.

“Of course.” I
nodded, slowly letting my eyes slip from Grey’s gaze. I walked down
the bar and handed Jimmy a cigarette.

“I ran out.” He
explained.

“Sure.” I
turned to look back at Grey. He had moved as well, almost mimicking
my movement, so we were in the same proximity as before, just in
different places in the room. Our eyes met and a slow smirk lifted
the corner of his mouth. I grinned.

This continued
throughout the evening. Slowly we moved around the room, finding
some excuse to keep from actually meeting, staring at each other
whenever we had the opportunity. It was like a bizarre dance we
were doing, and though there was space between us, the heat between
us was unreal. The thrill of anticipation.

Eventually,
there were no more excuses, no one else to talk to, nowhere else to
stand. Just Grey and I, coming slowly together as if it were the
most natural movement in the world. We stopped close together,
close enough that I could smell his delicious scent, could feel the
heat coming off his body. We looked at each other a moment. I could
barely breathe.

“Damn, girl.”
He looked down into my eyes and chuckled. I knew he was referring
to my wide, black pupils. I shrugged without looking away. Then,
wordlessly, his hand slid down my arm, from my elbow to my hand. I
shivered at his touch. He took my hand in his and gently pulled me
from the room.

We emerged back
into the loud, rowdy part of the club. The party was still going
strong. I wanted to die with happiness as Grey led me through the
clubbers, his hand around mine. All the women that stared at him
longingly as we passed would turn in surprise, glaring at me when
they realized we were together. But I didn’t care. They could all
hate me, I didn’t care. Because I was with Grey.

Kryptonite
by Three Doors Down was playing. We found a space
on the dance floor but we didn’t need much room. Grey placed his
hands on my hips, pulling me near. I looked up at him as we moved
together. He smiled, his lips curving upon his stubbled cheeks, his
tanned skin. I pressed my hands against the top of his chest,
trailing them slowly down his hard torso, feeling each and every
muscle defined beneath my fingertips. I bit my lip and looked up at
him, into the full, scorching gaze of his deep blue eyes.

It took mere
moments until we were kissing. He pulled me toward him, burying his
hand into the curls at the back of my neck to bring me closer yet.
I wrapped my arms around his neck, running my fingers through his
hair. We moved together in time to the song, but neither of us was
dancing anymore. We kissed feverishly, almost desperately, as the
song played through … and the next, and the next …. His hands were
on my arms, my back, my hips—scorching my skin through the thin
black fabric of my dress as if I were wearing nothing at all. And
suddenly I didn’t want to be.

As if he could
read my mind, Grey pulled away, his blue eyes smouldering. I didn’t
want him to stop. He took my hand again and wordlessly we left the
dance floor. He led me through the crowd, impatient, almost. I
didn’t think to wonder where we were going, so long as we continued
where we left off. Hastily, we made our way through the partiers
into the VIP section, then down the hallway into the little room
off the back. I wondered if anyone was staring at us, but I didn’t
turn to look.

The room was
empty. There were a few club chairs in a circle and a round coffee
table in the middle. A chalky mirror sat on the table. I took all
this in with one glance as Grey shut the door behind us. As soon as
the lock had been turned, Grey grasped me tightly by the hips with
his strong hands and pushed me roughly towards the nearest chair. I
fell back willingly, eagerly accepting his weight as it crushed
down on me. I wrapped my legs around him and met his lips with just
as much intensity.

His hands felt
so good. His hands and his lips and just the hardness of his body
as it pressed against mine. I had never felt this way before with
any other boy. I had never experienced this level of lust, of
complete and utter abandon. I couldn’t think straight anymore, I
just wanted all of me to experience all of him. I couldn’t get
enough. Swiftly I ripped his shirt off, delighting in the dark,
hard muscle of his chest, running my hands down it. Slowly his
hands moved from my hips to my waist, and I moaned at the delicious
trail of heat they left upon my skin. Desperately I wanted his
hands to move up. I arched my back instinctively, pressing my chest
against him. Grey made a noise then, like a growl almost, and moved
his hand to my breast.

The moment he
touched me I knew I would have sex with him. The thought took me by
surprise as I realized we were headed in that exact direction. I
wanted it—I did, more than I ever had with anyone else. I’d never
done it with any other boy because I’d never felt like this before.
I’d never wanted someone so badly. I’d never been in love, real
love, like I was with Grey. I welcomed his caresses fervently. I
felt his hand on my knee, his fingers trailing fire as the slowly
moved up my leg, under my skirt, up my thigh ….

“I love you. I
love you Grey.” I spoke the words before I realized it. They just
slipped out. I’d been thinking them, and then suddenly they were on
my lips, and I had said them. My eyes opened wide with shock, and I
looked at Grey, curious to see how he would react.