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Authors: Johanna Lindsey

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BOOK: Let Love Find You
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But she didn’t dare make a sound until he was back in her arms. She didn’t want him to know just how much she wanted him, too. He could still come to his senses. . . .

But then he was kissing her again, and lying so close to her that she could curl around him and did, placing one leg over his hips, locking it there, putting both arms around his neck, locking those, too. She couldn’t hold back at that point, feeling so much of his skin against her, his heat, that a moan of pleasure escaped her, but it didn’t scare him away, it urged him to greater boldness.

He didn’t share her hesitancy or the deep shyness that couldn’t be conquered quite yet, much as she wished it would go away. A desperate need made her hold so tight to him when she wanted to do so much more. But she was aware of everything he did, when his hands began moving all over her and stirring her to even greater heights of sensual pleasure.

Everywhere he touched, she tingled. Her neck, her shoulder, down her back, and slowly over her derriere before continuing along the thigh she had wrapped around him. But when his mouth began to take that same path, he seemed to want her to let go of his neck to give him more access. She whimpered, held him tighter, and heard him laugh just before he won that battle by leaning up and immediately lowering his head to capture one of her breasts in his mouth. Suckled with heat, her body was no longer in her control and arched into him, played to his tune, and it was galvanizing, her breaths coming in small pants now.

It was too much, what he was evoking, such a constant swirl inside, so many primal emotions that were almost frightening her, they were so unfamiliar, but deepest and most primitive was the urge to surrender to the torrent.

Then he was holding her eyes captive again. He wanted to watch her when the pleasure washed over her, and that’s what happened the second his fingers slid inside her. Her eyes flared,
then closed in that delicious abandon, her breath held, her amazement complete—no, not complete at all. He entered her while she was still in the throes of climax, drove deep to claim his own prize, and took her up to new heights. It was a different pleasure, so profound she felt it to her core, to the tips of her toes . . . to the recesses of her heart.

He was kissing her again, languorously, tenderly. Amanda was only vaguely aware of it, floating in a haze of happy contentment, until his brief laugh shook her. But she didn’t even wonder about it since he lay back and drew her leg across him again. He pulled her arm across his chest, too, and wrapped his around her shoulder, holding her firmly to his side. She smiled to herself as she snuggled even closer.

His humor was directed at himself, she realized, when he said, “It’s usually not so quick.”

She didn’t want to concentrate, she wanted to just savor the cocoon of happiness she was wrapped in, but she managed to at least say, “So it was special for us?”


Special
doesn’t begin to describe something that beautiful.”

She was going to say she agreed, but she floated into sleep instead, now that she could, now that the turmoil was gone.

Chapter Forty-Eight

A
MANDA HID HER FACE
under the blanket when she heard Alice enter the room with her morning tray. Or was it Devin leaving—no, she vaguely recalled waking in the middle of the night to find herself alone. She’d merely gone back to sleep, still smiling. She couldn’t get back to sleep now, not as early as she’d—they’d—gone to bed.

But she continued to hide her face simply because she was smiling again, couldn’t seem to stop it, and she didn’t want Alice to see and ask why. Good Lord, how was she going to get through the day feeling like this, so happy she felt like shouting?

“Come on then,” Alice said from the other side of the bed. “You don’t think I wanted to get up this early, do you?”

Early? Amanda pushed the blanket back to see that the room was still dark, with no light around the edges of the drapes to indicate it was morning yet.

“Why are you waking me?”

“Because you told me to. A riding lesson at dawn, before the guests arise. You don’t remember?”

Amanda laughed and leapt out of bed. Devin might have said last night that she didn’t need any more lessons, and she didn’t—now. Her choice had been made for her, which might be quite illogical, but there it was, and she wasn’t about to fight it when it felt so right. But after what they’d shared last night, she had no doubt that he’d still be waiting for her at the stables.

“And don’t you look perky this morning,” Alice remarked as she helped Amanda into her robe. “So tired you didn’t even put your nightclothes on? That must have been a good sleep.”

“Indeed, it feels like the best I’ve ever had.” Amanda walked over to examine the tray of pastries.

“You’ve made your decision, haven’t you?” Alice guessed.

Amanda kept her back to the maid. She was smiling again! But she didn’t want to tell anyone why, not even Alice. At least, not until she’d spoken with Devin and shared her feelings with him first. Would he be surprised? No, he’d probably known that she was in love with him before she’d figured it out! No wonder he’d given in last night.

“Well?”

Amanda peeked back at Alice with a grin. “I’m not going to say until after he declares himself—which just might be today!”

Alice laughed, drawing her own conclusions. But she was moving toward the bed to change the bedding as she did every morning. Amanda’s eyes widened, appalled by the realization that Alice was about to find some very noticeable evidence of last night’s activity. How could Amanda have forgotten about that?

She quickly said, “The bedding can wait. I ate so early last night, I think I need something a little more substantial from the kitchen. But do hurry, I don’t want to be late for my lesson.”

Alice nodded and headed for the door. “I don’t think you
need to worry about being late. There was a stir in the kitchen when I arrived, something about one of the guests blocking the back stairs. He must have gotten lost and was too foxed to go any farther, so he slept right there! But he got nasty when the butler tried to wake him. Then your Cupid came in for a bite, heard the fuss, and said he’d take care of it. So he’s helping the young lord to bed.”

Alice didn’t wait for a reply, not that Amanda could think of one. Devin was going to help Farrell? Off the property would be her guess. But while she had a few moments alone, she rushed to the washstand for a quick rinse, then changed the bedding herself and hid the old sheets. But with the evidence gone, her smile didn’t return.

Exter had got off too easy last night. She hoped Devin would trounce him again. Actually, she should tell her father about Farrell’s nasty plan, but realized she couldn’t, not without talking to Devin about it first. Preston would want to know why Devin was keeping such a close eye on her that he’d actually come to her room last night to check on her and be on hand to rescue her. While she didn’t doubt that Devin would propose marriage to her now, she wanted to actually hear him do so, before she shared that wonderful news with her father.

Outside, Devin was walking Farrell
Exter to the stable. Forcing was more like it. Arm around the other man’s shoulders as if they were friends, Farrell didn’t know how close he was to another beating. The bounder was wisely holding his tongue. No apologies, no excuses. Did he even remember? But Farrell finally noticed where they were headed and tried to stop.

Devin kept them walking. “You’re leaving.”

“No, I’m—”

“Leaving now. And let me refresh your memory, just in case your sodden state deluded you into forgetting. If you ever come near Amanda Locke again, I’ll kill you.”

Farrell paled. “I was drunk, man. I didn’t know what I was doing.”

“Doesn’t matter. My promise stands.” Devin shoved Farrell the last few feet toward the stable door.

Farrell dropped all pretense and swung about to snarl at him, “I have belongings in that house!”

“I’ll have one of the servants leave your things outside the back door. Get your horse saddled, pick up your belongings, and be gone. And I would advise you to avoid me in the future. You don’t know how close I came to killing you last night.”

Fear on his face, yet impotent fury in his blue eyes, Farrell turned and disappeared into the stable. Pathetic man, as bad as John Trask, both chained to their weaknesses. Trask had begged Devin not to mention to anyone that he’d gone even deeper into debt with that unsavory lender. Yet Devin had seen Trask since then gambling again! Unlike William, whose parents had left him in debt, those two gamblers had no excuse. They looked for a free ride in the turn of a card when they could have done what most second sons did, join the military to distinguish themselves with honor, instead of shaming their families with debtors’ prison, which is where those two were headed.

Devin returned to the house to have Exter’s things fetched, then moved to the corner of the house where he could watch to make sure Farrell left the property—and stop Amanda if she came outside before that happened. He wasn’t going to let her have words with the man again if he could prevent it.

But he didn’t really think she’d show up this morning. He wasn’t sure what he was going to say to her if she did. His
conscience was prompting him to take off with his tail between his legs just as Farrell was. She deserved so much better.

He’d lost every bit of common sense he had last night. He hated Farrell Exter for setting that in motion, for what Farrell had attempted to do to Amanda, for what the man had caused
him
to do to Amanda. Devin had been so scared by what could have happened to her that he’d lost all control and just let his feelings take over.

It was an amazing night. He was so tempted to believe that she could love him and he could have a life with her. But he knew better. Now he was wallowing in guilt for not having had the will to resist Amanda Locke.

Chapter Forty-Nine

A
MANDA MISSED CATCHING THE
sunrise, but only by minutes. That early in the morning, there was no doubting winter had arrived, as cold as it was. But Alice had dressed her accordingly in her longest and thickest coat. It had the added benefit of covering her riding skirt, at least it would until she was actually on her horse. The ride would warm her. It always did, considering who rode beside her.

She hurried to the stable, was nearly running in her eagerness to see Devin again, bubbly with excitement. The door was open. Devin was just inside with his horse, already saddled, tightening the straps. Herbert had been getting her mare ready for her for these early-dawn rides, ever since she’d told him about her lessons, but the groom was probably late this morning because of the party last night.

Devin heard her arrive, glanced her way, but his expression was more solemn than she’d ever seen it, and that wiped the smile from her lips. She thought for a moment that the light of day behind her might be preventing him from seeing
who she was, until he said, “I didn’t expect you to show up this morning.”

She moved forward slowly, confused. “You were going riding without me?”

“No, I’m leaving.”

She was crushed, pain welling up in her chest, but she fought to push it back. Now would not be the time to jump to conclusions. Something could have happened that she didn’t know about to make him have to leave for a while—and look so serious about it.

“Why?” she asked hesitantly.

“Last night shouldn’t have happened. I was supposed to help you made a good match, not get in the way of you making one. I don’t belong here, Mandy, and I certainly don’t belong in your life. The most I could ever be for you was a riding instructor, and now those lessons are over.”

She was too shocked and hurt by his rejection of her to say a word. She was about to run for the house when she saw old Herbert coming up the aisle with her mare, and she ran past Devin to reach Sarahtoo instead. Herbert started to give her a boost up, but with her split skirt, she didn’t need it. She nudged the mare toward the door, would have raced out of there if Devin weren’t blocking the way.

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