“Go on, now,” he said. “Before Daddy hears us.”
“You reckon he’s gonna be mad?”
“Don’t you worry none. I’ll talk to him. Besides, you’ll be back by suppertime. He won’t hardly have time to miss you.”
It was settled, then. I was gonna cross the river for the very first time.
Crossing the River
I RAN TO THE OUTHOUSE FIRST, THEN BACK ACROSS the front yard. The rain had slowed to a sprinkle, but there was still enough nip in the air to send a shiver down my arms. Mud squished between my toes as I got to the clothesline where Mama’s apron sagged. Wasn’t no time better than now for me to get that little piece of sash I needed for Mama’s quilt.
I set the eggs down on the ground so I could reach up and pick loose the threads that connected the sash to the rest of the apron. Had to pull a little as I picked with my fingernail, to help loosen the seam. Didn’t take but one good hard yank for it to come apart. As I stuffed the sash into my front pocket, I took off running for the footpath.
I stopped short when Delilah started braying. I couldn’t just leave without giving her some breakfast.
I poured in an extra scoop on account of the rain and gave her ears a scratch. “Don’t you worry, Delilah. I’ll be back before you know it.” As I gave her one last pat on the neck, I caught a flash of yellow from the corner of my eye.
I looked the other way and started running.
I don’t know why, but I didn’t want Etta Mae to know I was going. I just wanted to do it. Then, when I had the doctor beside me, that’s when I’d talk to Etta Mae.
I reckon I was afraid if I stopped moving I might start thinking about all the reasons it was crazy for me to go to Camden. If I didn’t just keep putting one foot in front of the other, I might lose my courage.
As soon as I passed the footpath that led to Aunt Doshie’s house, the rain stopped altogether. Up ahead I could see the whitewashed walls of Pleasant Grove Baptist Church. On the front steps I could just make out the tall thin shape of Reverend Irvin.
Of all days to be sneaking off from Gee’s Bend, Sunday had to be the worst. Trouble was, the footpath went right in front of the church, so wasn’t no avoiding Reverend Irvin.
I slowed to a walk and tried to think of what I might say to him. Soon as he spotted me, Reverend Irvin lifted his hand in a wave. “Morning, Ludelphia,” he said. “You sure early this morning.”
The less I said, the better, so I just waved. But wasn’t no way I could get by without stopping. So soon as I got to the church steps, I gave him a smile. Would have been rude not to.
Reverend Irvin put his hands together like he was praying and pressed ’em against his mouth and nose. “Your mama doing any better today?”
“No, sir.” I reached up to straighten my eye patch. “Reckon it’s turned to pneumonia, like Aunt Doshie said.” I hated saying them words. But better to focus on Mama than what I was doing out so early in the rain. “Now she’s coughing up blood.”
“Oh, Ludelphia.” Reverend Irvin shook his head. “That why you came, then? To get me?”
I nodded, even though it wasn’t why I came at all. It just sounded good. With Reverend Irvin praying over Mama here in Gee’s Bend and me heading to Camden to get help, Mama just might make it. Besides, it wasn’t a lie exactly. I just wasn’t telling him everything I knew.
Reverend Irvin started down the church steps. “I’m sorry to hear it, Ludelphia. Ain’t no finer lady than your mama. Not in Gee’s Bend or anyplace.”
I about cried when he said that. Because Reverend Irvin knew lots of folks. He’d been lots of places too. If he said my mama was a fine lady, then I knew it was really true.
“Run on, then,” he said. “Tell your Daddy I’ll be up there directly.”
I nodded again. This time it felt like a lie through and through. Reckon Mama would wash my mouth out if she knew.
As Reverend Irvin went back into the church, I turned like I was heading down the footpath toward home. Wasn’t right to fool him like this. But I could apologize later, after the doctor came and made Mama all better. By then it wouldn’t matter much.
I waited a second more, then bolted into the woods so Reverend Irvin couldn’t see me going in the other direction. He’d find out soon enough from Ruben and Daddy where I was.
By the time I got to the river, the sun was peeking through the clouds in places. But wasn’t the sky that held my attention. It was the river.
The water was making some kind of racket, and it was flowing higher than I’d ever seen it. Why, it was a muddy mess, with all sorts of broken tree branches and dead leaves rushing past. I reckon it was on account of the storm, but that water was moving so fast the cable that held the ferry in place was groaning from the strain. I ain’t never seen the river like that.
“Willie Joe! You there?” Usually he sat in a little lean-to that was built right on the bank of the river, and just as soon as anybody got close, he’d come out to greet them.
“Willie Joe?” I said again as I got closer to the lean-to. The door was open, but wasn’t nobody inside. Wasn’t no sound except the roar of the river.
Where was he? Wasn’t a time I’d come down to the ferry when the ferry was there but Willie Joe wasn’t.
“Willie Joe!” I hollered, throwing my head back. Up above, the clouds raced across the sky like they was in a contest with the river. They was in a hurry just like me.
I made another circle around the lean-to. Still no Willie Joe.
How on earth was I gonna get across now?
I sat myself on the wet riverbank to think a minute. If only Ruben was here. He’d know what to do. Or Etta Mae. I reckon she’d have some ideas.
What was it Mama always said?
It takes a heap of licks to strike a nail in the dark
. Wasn’t no use wandering around aimlessly. I just needed to sit till I got a clear plan in my head. Then I could tackle that river.
Without even knowing it, I pulled my needle and cloth out of my pocket. Put in a whole row of stitches before I even knew I was doing it.
When I was leaving, Ruben said for me to take the ferry straight over. Not to stop till I got to the doctor’s office. Like it was all so simple. He didn’t tell me nothing about what to do if Willie Joe wasn’t around or if I couldn’t find the doctor’s office. Wasn’t no map for me to look at and nobody for me to ask. All I had was my needle and some cloth and a bundle of six eggs.
I jerked my chin up and patted the ground all around me. What had I done with them eggs?
My face got hot with shame when I remembered I set them eggs down next to the clothesline. I’d run off without them.
Now how was I gonna pay Doc Nelson?
“Ain’t no use thinking about that now,” I said as I tucked away my stitching. Didn’t make no difference about whether or not I had eggs if I didn’t first get myself across that river.
I stood then and walked closer to the river’s edge. Once I heard Teacher say the distance between Camden and Gee’s Bend was the longest hundred yards he’d ever crossed. I reckon he should know, on account he used the ferry twice a day whenever he came to teach. But I can’t say for sure because I ain’t never measured it. To me it looked about as wide as the distance between the chinaberry tree in our front yard and the outhouse in back.
The ferry itself wasn’t nothing more than logs tied together with rope. Most times it was for carrying folks to get their bags of seed and other things from Mr. Cobb at Camden Mercantile. But it was about as big as the inside of our cabin, so it could carry over a wagon and a pair of horses too.
I reckon it was the cables that made it strong. One cable held the ferry to a metal wheel way up high. The wheel ran along the other cable that was strung between two trees on either side of the river. So all Willie Joe had to do to get folks across was push his long pole against the bottom of the river. Then the little wheel would turn and the ferry would follow it straight across.
The pole. Wouldn’t get nowhere unless I got hold of Willie Joe’s pole.
I looked all along the riverbank till finally I found it hiding in some leaves that must have blown over it during the storm.
That pole was taller than I was. But once I got it firm in my hand, wasn’t no more thinking about it. I held my breath and jumped from the bank to the ferry.
The logs dipped into the water when I landed, nearly knocking me off balance. But I grabbed hold of the rail just in time.
I was on the river! For the first time in my whole life, there wasn’t a bit of solid dirt under my feet. Just thousands of buckets of water.
I wished Mama could see me. Even if she was mad about it, I reckon she’d be proud too.
Above me the cable groaned as a tangle of tree branches slammed into the ferry. To keep myself from falling, I dug my toes in between the logs. I was working so hard to keep my feet in place, I forgot about my hands. Next thing I knew, Willie Joe’s pole was rolling along the floor of the ferry.
As I scrambled after the pole, freezing water splashed onto my arms and legs. I gritted my teeth against the cold. Then, just as the pole was about to roll off the edge of the ferry, I got my fingers wrapped around it.
I grinned. Didn’t matter that my dress was sticking to my legs and goose bumps was popping up all over. I was crossing the river!
Now was the time for the hard part. The ferry wobbled as I planted the pole into the muddy bottom of the river. I tried to do it just the way I’d seen Willie Joe do.
Trouble was, I wasn’t as big as Willie Joe. And the current was so strong, it was like the ferry was stuck. It was acting all stubborn, the way Delilah does in the late afternoons after being in the field all day. The ferry just sat there straining to go downstream when I wanted it to go across.
I threw all my weight against the pole. I pushed so hard the muscles in my arms burned.
“You can do it,” I said as I planted the pole again, this time in front of the ferry. As the logs shifted underneath me and we began to inch along, I knew it was working. The ferry was moving!
Again and again I lifted the pole and planted it into the mud at the bottom of the river. Again and again the ferry moved a little closer to the other shore.
“Dear Lord, thank you!” I said to the sky as the wheel kept on turning. Then I thought of Etta Mae. She was gonna love this story. Silly old eye patch couldn’t stop me.
By the time I got to the center of the river, my breath came out in quick puffs and it felt like my arms was on fire. Wasn’t no time to stop, though. Not with the water rushing along and the ferry bucking like a mule that ain’t been broke.
I lifted the pole again and pushed it deep in the water. This time the pole went down and down and down without stopping. Wasn’t no bottom in this part of the river! And the current was so strong it was sucking the pole right out of my fingers.
I gasped as the pole slipped into the water and disappeared for a moment, then popped back up to the surface. I reached, but it was already on its way down the river. It got smaller and smaller till I couldn’t see it no more.
What was I gonna do now? Wasn’t no way to get the ferry across the river without a pole, unless you counted swimming. Which I didn’t, on account I ain’t never learned how.
Mama, why didn’t you let Daddy or Ruben teach me to swim? Just because I got this old eye patch. Ain’t no reason for not learning to do outside things.
Just then a gust of wind caught the ferry. The cable that held the ferry to the wheel screeched like a hungry owl. The cable began to unravel, slowly at first, then faster and faster. Then I heard a popping sound and the ferry jerked free. Next thing I knew, me and the ferry wasn’t going across no more. We was heading downstream same as Willie Joe’s pole.
I got low as I could to the bottom of the ferry. I mean, we was flying down that river. I ain’t never gone so fast in my life. Freezing cold water was rushing into my face, pushing against my eye patch. I couldn’t catch my breath, and I thought I was gonna die for sure.
Where in the world did this river go? I tried to picture the map Teacher showed us at school. I knew the river looped and turned all through Alabama, and at the end it dumped into Mobile Bay. Wasn’t no telling where I’d end up.
I looked behind me. How far was I now from Gee’s Bend? How far from Camden?
Wasn’t nothing I could see that looked familiar to me. I reckon I thought the river would look the same no matter where you was. But I got to tell you, that river was full of surprises. Wasn’t long before it got wider, like it was turning into a lake. And the water started to slow down. Didn’t help me none. I still couldn’t swim and now I was a whole lot farther from the shore.
What would happen if I jumped? Would I sink under the water and never come back up? Mama always said it’s best not to rush into things. That sometimes the answer to a problem will come to you if you just wait it out.
But what did Mama know about this river? She was born in Gee’s Bend and ain’t never spent a night noplace else. Only time she ever crossed over was when the blackberries was ripe and ready to sell.
She was scared of the river, that’s what I think. Her mama never did teach her how to swim neither.
Well, I didn’t have time for being scared. Wasn’t all that far to the shore. Couldn’t be no farther than the distance from the chinaberry tree to the last cabin on our row. And could be my arms and legs would get in there and know just what to do.
I checked my pocket to be sure my needle and cloth was shoved in just as far as they could go. Then I got real close to the edge of the ferry, sucked in my breath, and did the only thing I could think of.
I jumped.
I mean to tell you, that water didn’t have no manners whatsoever. Didn’t stop to say hello or how do you do. It was like a door that was open one second, slammed shut the next.
At first I just let myself sink. My ears popped as I drifted down, and when I opened my eye all I could see was a billion bubbles.