Laying Low in Hollywood (2 page)

   “Yeah, I’m fine, why?” he snapped, his voice sounded cold and aloof.  I immediately felt as if I was irritating him.

   “It’s just that I got home from China last night and the house looks like no one has even lived here since I left.  I was worried that something had happened to you,” I said.

   “Lane, we need to talk, can you meet me for lunch?” he asked, I was surprised by the seriousness in his tone.  His voice sounded different...distant, emotionless.  I was suddenly on edge, something was not right.

   “Sure Greg, is something wrong?” I asked.  My mouth was dry and I could feel the panic rising in my chest once again, as my 6th sense told me that yes, something was wrong.

   “It’s kind of complicated to get into over the phone. We’ll talk at lunch,” said Greg, his voice was cold and dismissive.

   I sighed, slightly frustrated.  Whatever it was, he wasn’t willing to tell me what was up, over the phone.  I didn’t even press him to tell me, the point was mute.  Greg would tell me when he was good and ready, that’s just how he was.  I was certain that the news he had for me, was not good. 

   I frowned as I leaned against the kitchen counter and took a sip of my coffee.  I had a good idea what was bothering him.  Lately, Greg hated it that I traveled so much, he had been fine with it at first, he had even been very proud that I had been following my dreams.  Recently though, his attitude had changed.  Every time I a planned a trip, it seemed as if Greg took it personally.  He whined that I never paid any attention to him, that I was never around for him.  This trip to China, had probably put him right over the edge!

   I sighed miserably, as I glanced out the kitchen window at the light snow in the yard.  The morning sun was illuminating the light dusting of snow and causing it to shimmer like an opal, brilliant and mesmerizing. 

   My shoulders were almost sagging in defeat already.  I assumed the problem was, that Greg wanted me home more.  He was old fashioned, he thought it was my job to stay home and take care of him and take care of our house.  It wasn’t hard for me, in the summer time.  I could be outside, working in the flower beds and the vegetable garden.  In the winter I felt cooped up.  The house always seemed cold and lonely, the few hours I spent at the ice rink weren’t enough for me. 

   My career in Colorado Springs had taken off eight years ago, when I had I agreed to be a coach and choreographer for Kyle and Lucie, a pairs couple who had just teamed up.  Now they were twenty and twenty one years old, and I hoped, they would soon be World Champions.

   When I first began coaching, there was never much need for me to travel far, I went to a few regional competitions, but I hadn’t needed to travel far, or for more than a few days at a time.  Now that I worked with World Class skaters I was obligated to accompany them wherever they needed to travel for competitions and exhibitions.  It wasn’t an issue for me, I loved to travel and I had been enjoying jetting all over the world, seeing all kinds of new and different places. 

   I was addicted now, I knew I didn’t want to give up my new found freedom.  It wasn’t as if I was abandoning Greg on purpose, I’d invited him to come with me many times, but he refused.  Greg really didn’t care to fly.  It wasn’t that he was afraid to fly, but he hated airports and all the recent security fuss.  According to Greg, he wasn’t about to be harassed by the TSA just to fly to a skating competition he had no interest in.

   So I always traveled alone, though now it seemed that Greg had an issue with that too.  I wondered if I could ever win.  I sighed, I guess if I just stayed home and took care of him, everything would be just fine.

Chapter 2

   Greg and I had made plans to meet at our favorite restaurant at 11:30.  I was anxious just thinking about it, Greg had planned it early, before the lunch crowd arrived, so I assumed that he was expecting a confrontation.  I sighed miserably at the prospect, I was finally happy with my life and my career, I really had no desire to fight with him about it.

   When I arrived at the restaurant, Greg was already there, waiting for me.  He was seated in a booth in the back corner, it was where we always sat.  Everyone knew us there, we had lunch there at least twice a week in the summer time, though I hadn’t been there in months, I’d been so busy.

   Greg eyed me warily as I approached the table.  He was sitting in the corner, with his back to the wall.  Of course, I would sit in my usual spot across the table from him.  I could already feel my resolve weakening.  Greg exuded a presence, a confidence I guess, people rarely argued with him.  His manner left no room for argument.

   I gave him a slight smile, as I slid into the seat across from him.  Even at forty five years old, Greg was very attractive.  He was wearing a dark wool suit and a bold patterned yellow tie.  His short, dark, hair was peppered with silver and it gave him the look of an aging movie star.  His steel blue eyes appraised me cooly as I situated myself in our booth. I looked him over, silently wondering why he seemed so distant.

   “Am I late?” I teased, flashing him a sly smile.  Greg was always early, and he hated it when others were late, but I knew, I was right on time.

   “You look good Lane,” he said, not really answering my question.  His voice was coarse with emotion. 

   “Ummm, thanks,” I said, a little thrown off by the unexpected compliment.  His eyes seemed to be assessing me carefully, I was surprised by his scrutiny, though I hadn’t seen him in almost two weeks.

   “That dress is nice, you should always wear dresses, you’ve definitely got the legs for it,” he told me, then his eyes darted nervously back to the menu again. 

   I was wearing a gray sweater dress, and I had spent a great deal of time putting on my makeup and straightening my unruly blonde hair.  My daughter Baylee had urged me to start straightening my naturally wavy hair.  She told me it would make me look younger.  I had been pleased with the results, I really did look younger.  Today, my hair was straight and silky and parted to one side.  I could almost hide behind it, if I let it fall into my face, which I was thinking would be a good thing, if there was a confrontation coming.

   I had just picked up the menu, when our waitress Donna, who I have known for years, approached us to take our drink order.

   “Well hey there Lane, I’m kind of surprised to see you here,” she cried, flashing me an excited smile.

   “Um, I’ve been out of town a lot, with my skaters,” I told her distractedly.  I looked up to see that Greg was giving her a bug eyed look and suddenly, I was acutely uncomfortable. Everything was wrong, why was she so surprised to see me, and why was Greg being so rude?

   “Iced tea,” snapped Greg, narrowing his eyes at her.

   “Uhh, white wine,” I mumbled, surprised that he was treating Donna so poorly.

   Donna didn’t seem to even notice that Greg was glaring at her, she was still staring at me as if I were an alien.  It was completely unnerving me.

   “I’ll be right back with your drinks, you look gorgeous Lane, have you lost weight?” asked Donna, smiling at me.

   “I don’t think so,” I told her with a shrug.  People rarely saw me dressed up, so I guessed it was the dress.  I had picked it on purpose, it was very flattering.  It hugged all my curves and I felt very sexy in it.  Greg had worked late last night, but I was hoping after seeing me today, he’d be home early tonight.

   Greg gave Donna a stern look, she flashed him a fake smile and trotted away to get our drinks.  I was glancing distractedly at the menu.  I was nervous, I wanted to know what was up, but secretly, I was certain I didn’t want to know.  I wasn’t sure what I would say to Greg, if he asked me to give up my career.

   It was what I loved to do, I had traveled extensively before Greg and I were married.  I had spent more than three years skating with the European Theater Company’s ice show, then when injuries prevented me from continuing in my own professional career, I had worked as their choreographer for another two years.

   I had given all that up for nearly twenty years to raise our children.  Now I was back on the circuit and I was ecstatic, this was what I had always wanted to do. 

   I peeked over the top of my menu at Greg.  He seemed nervous.  That was not like him at all.  Greg was always calm, cool and collected, and he always expected everyone to do exactly what he said. 

   I was anxious, unfortunately, I never fared well in confrontations, especially with Greg.  I usually did whatever it was, he asked to me to do.  I was pretty much a pushover.  I closed my eyes and took a slow deep breath in an attempt to slow the furious beating of my heart.  This time, his intimidation techniques, were not going to work on me.

   “So, how was China?” he asked, nonchalantly, as he glanced over the menu.  I frowned, he was trying to avoid making eye contact with me.  I almost rolled my eyes, he didn’t need to look at the menu, he always ordered the same thing.             

   “I wouldn’t want to live there, it was much too crowded for me, but I enjoyed it.  I love traveling, you know, seeing places I’ve never seen before and being immersed in another culture temporarily,” I told him with a smile.

   “Uh, yeah,” said Greg, distractedly.  I narrowed my eyes at him, he would just grunt, if that were an acceptable response to me, but he knew better.

   “And your skaters, how did they do?” he asked, not even looking up from his menu.

   “They took the silver, but it was so close, they missed the gold by just a few points.  I was so proud of Kyle and Lucie, they did so well.  I know they are going to take the gold medal at Worlds this year.  They just keep getting better and better together,” I told him, swallowing nervously. 

   I snuck a look at Greg, his jaw was clenched and he appeared to be far away in thought.  I was almost trembling in anticipation, this was small talk, Greg was nervous, he was biding his time, whatever it was he wanted to say, was going to upset me.  He was waiting for the proper moment.  I was nervously waiting for the bomb to be dropped.

   Donna returned to the table and set our drinks in front of us.  Greg made a big deal of rooting through the sugars and sweeteners in the basket, looking for the raw sugar in a brown packet.  Donna rolled her eyes miserably, she was eyeing me warily as she took our orders, which I found to be very odd.

   “I’ll have the salmon salad, Donna, and can I have the house dressing on the side?” I asked.  I was so nervous, I didn’t want anything too heavy.

   “Certainly Mrs. ummm...Ms. Jensen,” said Donna, stumbling over her words, she seemed incredibly nervous as she scratched my order on her pad.  She seemed poised for flight and she never even made eye contact with Greg as she waited for him to order.  I gave her a curious look, she was acting rather odd.  Greg and I had been coming to this restaurant for years now, yet she was treating me as if I were a stranger.  I was a bit shaken by it.

   Greg ordered a reuben sandwich and fries, pretty much the same thing he always ordered.  Donna nodded and gave us a fake smile, then she turned abruptly and headed for the kitchen.  I frowned, something was definitely wrong.  Donna was acting almost as strangely as Greg was.
             

   I leaned back in my seat and took a sip of my wine, I wouldn’t normally have wine with lunch, but my gut was telling me an alcoholic drink was in order.  Greg took off his reading glasses and gave me his most serious look, his eyes looked empty and unfriendly.  I could feel every fiber in my body constrict with fear.

   “I guess you’re wondering what is up,” he said, staring at me seriously.  I was chewing on my lower lip nervously, my heart was suddenly pounding in fear.  I hated confrontations, and I knew without a doubt now, that a confrontation was definitely coming.

   “Yes,” I said.  I was numb, my voice seemed to have no emotion in it.

   Greg gave me a troubled look.  His grayish blue eyes seemed steely and cold, I almost shivered, as they raked over me.  Finally, he sighed deeply.  “I guess the best thing to do is just spit it out.”

   I gave him a helpless shrug, for some reason I couldn’t speak at all.  I had no idea what news I was facing, though whatever it was, I could tell that Greg didn’t want to tell me.  Whatever the news was, it was going to make me very unhappy!  I was suddenly fighting the urge to just chug my glass of wine and order another.  Like I said before, I didn’t deal well with confrontations!

   “I wanted to be delicate about this, so I had to see you in person.  I thought it might be a bit harsh to tell you over the phone, but the truth is, I’m moving out Lane.” his voice was so distant and matter of fact, it didn’t seem like it was coming out of the mouth of someone I had known and loved almost half of my life.

   “What?” I mouthed, the shock was rushing over me like a surging tide.  That hadn’t been what I’d been expecting at all, and my head was suddenly spinning, unable to comprehend the meaning of his words.  In the moments it took for my frenzied brain to absorb his words, my lower lip had started trembling and my heart suddenly felt like a rock.  I could only hope that I had misunderstood him.  I was staring at him blankly, unable to say another word.

   “I’m sorry Lane, I’m moving out...I want a divorce,” said Greg, his voice was flat and emotionless.  I was shaking my head slowly, as if my denial could make his statement go away.  I was suddenly struggling to breathe, my mind still couldn’t seem to comprehend this.  I had been expecting a fight, accusations, tears, but this...this was so final.

   “But why?” I managed to breathe, my mind was suddenly going in a million directions.  I could feel my chest constricting painfully, his face was completely serious, but I felt like dissolving into maniacal laughter.  He was moving out...because I traveled too much?

   I struggled to breathe and think, what had happened?  Greg and I had been relatively happy, we rarely argued, except recently, about my frequent travel.  We’d always had a loving and mature relationship.  How could he suddenly want a divorce?

   “Why are you doing this?  Do you want me to stop traveling?  Is that what this is about?” I asked, I couldn’t come up with another reason for his unhappiness.  My mind was racing, we were happy...I was sure we were happy.  We never fought, the sex was great, what was happening?

   “I’m sorry Lane, I’m just not happy anymore,” said Greg, shrugging nonchalantly.

   “Not happy?” the words seemed to stick in my throat.  I thought about all the happy times we had together, our wedding, the birth of our children, all our family vacations.  How could he possibly be unhappy?  Sure our marriage had it’s ups and downs, what marriage didn’t?  Granted, this winter I had been busy, and I had been away a lot, but in May, when all the competitions were over, the kids would come home from college and we would plan a cruise vacation, or a silly road trip of some sort and we would all have a fabulous time.  It seemed completely inconceivable to me that he was unhappy.

   “Where will you go?” I asked, but suddenly the lightbulb in my head lit up.  I was so stupid, I had ignored all the signs, and they had all been right there in front of me!  Greg wasn’t asking to leave, he was already gone! 

   I shook my head numbly, I suddenly felt like a complete idiot.  It was why the house had been relatively unchanged when I arrived home from China, he hadn’t been there to mess it up.  This was all planned, he was already living with another woman.  I shuddered uncontrollably as it all became perfectly clear to me.  I was biting on my lower lip, trying to suppress the tears that were rushing to my eyes. 

   My frazzled brain was working to process it all.  I could see Donna staring at me, as she stood near the window where the food was passed from the kitchen.  I shook my head slowly as I suddenly realized, Donna had been surprised to see me here with Greg, because he had been frequenting our favorite restaurant with another woman!

   My chest was tight and I was struggling to take in a deep breath.  My acute distress was slowly changing to anger, I couldn’t believe it.  Greg was leaving me because he was having an affair!

   “It’s kind of complicated Lane,” said Greg, rolling his eyes miserably.

   “It’s not complicated at all!  You are having an affair!  Who is she Greg, do I know her?” I snapped, I was suddenly certain, he was leaving me for another woman.

   Greg looked away, as if it was too painful to tell me.  Then he turned to me and looked me in the eye confidently.

   “It’s Jill,” said Greg, he was suddenly glancing at me warily, as if he expected me to jump up from the table and attack him. 

   Don’t get me wrong, I wanted to.  I totally wanted to slap the shit out of him.  I just had a lot more class than that. My mind was reeling carelessly as it all sank in, it seemed too horrifying to be true.  My husband of more than twenty years was having an affair with his secretary! 

   My heart sank painfully and I was completely bewildered.  Jill was maybe twenty five years old, and completely gorgeous.  She was dark skinned and exotic looking.  She always wore clothes that drew attention to her recently augmented breasts.  Of course, he was having an affair with someone I didn’t have a snowball’s chance in hell against!