Ladle Rat Rotten Hut (10 page)

“Do whatever you want, Peter. It’s not like we’re back in
the real world for long. All I am saying is that she brings out the worse in
you. Is that why you brought Dracula back ?”

“How do you know that?”

“I can smell him. I can always smell my family.”

“You want to meet him?”

“Oh. No. He is a douche bag. And I don’t need him. Did you
tell him about his ancestors?”

“I did, but didn’t believe me.”

“Didn’t I tell you he is a douche bag? So you need him to
help you with resurrecting her?”

“Yes,” I nodded. “Now, if you please, could you go? Poof.
Like a Genie back in the bottle? I believe you have to hunt down seven lost
young people.”

“I will certainly go now,” the Queen packed her items. “I
don’t want to be here when she wakes up. She will turn this castle into a circus.”

“Kids love the circus; adults don’t. That’s what I love
about her.” I smirked.

“Peter,” The Queens stopped on her way out, putting a
finger to her lips. “You’re not just waking her up because you’re lonely. There
is something else on your mind. Trouble in Neverland?”

“None of your business,
Evil
Queen.” I stuck out my
tongue. She hated that name: Evil Queen.

“So there
is
trouble in Neverland,” She looked
happy, knowing that I was suffering somehow. “Even though the Snow White war
isn’t exactly yours, you know you will be joining my army soon, Peter. Even the
safety of Neverland depends on Snow White’s death.”

I didn’t comment, listening to the clock strike midnight in
the halls of my castle.

“Shall we begin?” Hunchy came out of the shadows.

“We shall,” I said. I didn'’t mind saying
shall
.
It’s better than him calling me
master
. “Would you show the Queen the
way out?”

As they left, I could hear the Queen taunting Hunchy about
his bad teeth as if this was the only bad feature about him.

I burst into Dracula’s chamber, expecting to get into a
lame conversation about zombies. Surprisingly, I found him reading Harry
Potter. The way he laughed while reading, he looked like a goblin.

“What the hell are you doing?” I protested. We had to get
going.

“This book is awesome,” He said. I had to blink twice,
making sure I am not in the Dreamworld anymore. “This Draco boy kicks butt. You
say his character is based upon me?”

I was tongue-tied. Sometimes comedy is most appalling.

“Slytherin.” He said aloud and laughed like kids.

“Please stop this,” I said. “You’re destroying everything I
love about vampires.”

“Oh?” he frowned, suddenly aware of himself losing his
prestige. “You’re right. What has gotten into me?”

I grabbed him by the arm. “Don’t you want to feed?”

“I had enough of those ugly boars.”

“I mean to feed on people, on a most beautiful princess?”

“Now we’re talking.” He said as his eyes turned demonic
red. That’s the Dracula I knew.

“Now we’re talking? Where did you even here that? These
books will spoil you.” I pulled him out of the room to the hall, where Sleeping
Beauty lay.

There was no sound to be heard outside, except of the
ticking clocks on the wall. Sleeping Beauty loved to listen to them in her one
hundred year sleep. She said she could hear the ticking in the Dreamworld, and
it kept her company.

Approaching the bed in the middle of the hall, Dracula
looked taken by her beauty. She was lying on her back in an open glass coffin
filled with water. She had been floating above the water for years. It’s the way
she liked her bed.

The curtains fluttered to a breeze of wind as we approached
her coffin.

Dracula couldn’t take his eyes off her. She had her hands
rested on her chest, and her eyes closed. Her golden hair floated around her
head, just like her white wet dress.

“She is so … “ Dracula shrugged. “Serene and beautiful.”

“Wait until she wakes up.” Hunchy chuckles, reminding me of
Dr. Evil in Austen Powers.

“Don’t scare him, Hunchy,” I interrupted. “She is all
right.” I assured Draco.

“How long has she been here?”

“What a silly question,” I tilted my head, picking up a
white apple floating on the water. “Even if you don’t know about the Brothers
Grimm curse, you must have heard about Sleeping Beauty—“

“The princess who was cursed for a hundred years—“ Hunchy
felt the need to explain before I shushed him.

“Sleeping Beauty is real?” Dracula estranged.

“We’re not going into that conversation again, are we?” I
said. “We’re all real.”

“Think of it,” Hunchy couldn’t stop himself from educating
Dracula. “If you are real, then all the characters in books are real.”

“He has a point,” I raised an eyebrow at Dracula. “He is an
ugly pain in the butt,
but
this time he is right.”

“Was she cursed by the Grimms as well?”

“Hmm,” I rubbed my chin. “That’s a question I can’t answer.
I don’t think I really know what’s going on. All I know is that I like waking
her up every one hundred years when we’re allowed to surface back from the
Dreamworld.”

“But she isn’t staked,” Dracula wondered. “In order to send
vampires to the Dreamworld, they have to be staked in the real world. That’s
how you woke me up.”

“He is getting smarter.” Hunchy, the annoying, chuckled.

“Stop it,” I told Hunchy firmly, then turned back to Draco.
“That’s right. I think her curse is a little different from ours. Frankly, this
curse thing confused me. It’s a long story, really. That’s why we need you.”

“What do you need me for?” Dracula gazed back at her,
distracted by her beauty.

“She needs your blood to wake up,” I said. “Actually, she
needs you to bite her to wake up.”

“Your blood is Royal blood,” Hunchy explained. “Nothing
else can wake her up.”

“I thought Sleeping Beauty woke up with a kiss.” Dracula
wondered.

“Well. For one, you are not capable of kissing. We both
know that you don’t feel anything when you kiss a girl—“

“Is Dracula gay?” Hunchy wondered.

“No, Hunchy,” I raised my voice a little. It echoed.
“Dracula is not gay. He just can’t feel kisses,” I gazed back at Dracula from
top to bottom. “You’re not gay, are you?” I had to ask.

“You’ve got any problem with that?” Dracula replied.

“Oh,” I shrugged. My best friend in Neverland was gay, and
I loved him. “Of course, not.” I said. Even Hunchy – whom I am not sure about
his sexual orientation – raised an eyebrow. I am not sure it was an eyebrow.
Hunchy’s features are so cramped up, I don’t know which is which sometimes.

“I was just messing with you,” Dracula laughed. “Can’t you
take a joke?”

Playing video games and reading Harry Potter turned out to
be useful for Draco after all; a better sense of humor that could really hurt
his reputation as a fang-master.

“So what are these?” He pointed at the white apples,
reaching for one.

“Don’t touch those,” I stopped him. “They are hers, and
they are rare.”

“I’ve never seen white apples before.” He commented.

“You’d call me a liar if I tell you that the lord has
created apples white, but then something awful happened in the fairy tale
world, and he decided to turn apples red. But that’s another story. So are you
ready for her?”

“All I have to do is bite her awake, right?” Dracula
brushed her cheek. I felt jealous, but I couldn’t do anything about it.

“Exactly,” I said as I turned to walk away with Hunchy.
“I’ll be in my chamber.”

“You’re not going to be here when I wake her?” Dracula
wondered.

“I prefer to wait for you two in my chamber,” I said. “She
is kind of feisty when she wakes up, and you too are vampires. You’ll get
along.”

Entering my chamber, I sat on my lazy-boy chair – which
totally killed the gothic feel of the castle. I leaned back, drinking carrot
juice.

“I don’t feel good about bringing her back, Pete.” Hunchy
said, looking awfully scared. He couldn’t get his eyes off the oaken
double-door, waiting for her to enter any moment.

“Be cool, Hunchy. Why do you fear her that much?”

“She is a brat, Pete. She likes to make a mess for fun. She
kills for fun. With no purpose. Just a sixteen-year-old bad girl. Last time she
lit my toes on fire when I was asleep.”

I tried to see if Hunchy actually had toes, but I couldn’t
make them out. “Sure it was your toes?”

“Ok,” He bowed his head. “It was my … ass. She lit my ass
on fire, and it took me two years to heal.”

“You have an ass?” I wondered.

“Not funny, Pete.” He looked hurt, and walked out of the
chamber through a back door. It was time for me here all alone, waiting for her
when she wakes up.

The truth was that I was a little intimidated. She tended
to scare me sometimes. But I loved her. She is my
Darling.

As I a stard at the closed door, I wondered what her
childhood was like. What part did the Brothers Grimm alter? All that talk about
the spindle, pricking her finger, and the curse. Was it real?

I didn’t know a lot about her previous life, because I met
Sleeping Beauty when she was lost in the streets of Paris, just all the other
kids I pity and save. I comforted and sent her to work for me in Neverland, so
she repays me. But I couldn’t help but fall in love with her chaotic moods. If
she were a princess before, then she was one hell of a spoiled brat.

She was different from the rest of the fairy tale crowd,
for many reasons. She didn’t have a war or a purpose. She just lived day by day
the way she wanted to live. Even when she helped the Queen in trying to get rid
of Snow White, she didn’t for the fun of it.

I had no idea why her hundred-year sleep was different from
the others. But she was damn special. People thought she was a Brother’s Grimm
or Charles Perrault character, but they were wrong. Sleeping Beauty was also a
Sir James Mathew Barrie’s character, and her real name was mentioned in my
altered story. She was one of the few who were mentioned twice with different
names in different books.

My thoughts were interrupted by a sudden scream behind the
door, followed by sounds of chaos of broken glass and vases in the hall. This
time it wasn't Deacula making a mess.

She was awake.

That’s why I didn’t want to be in there. I heard Dracula
scream. She was feeding on him. I know he was a big boy. He will survive. She
tended to be out of control when she was unfed, like a bratty princess
demanding a new toy.

The screaming stopped, and I waited for the door to burst
open any moment. I stood up, as if to pay my respects. It took some time before
the door flung open, and she stood by it.

My God. She was so beautiful. Well, she needed a bath from
the blood drooling from her lips. But except that, she was totally all right.

“Pete,” She smiled. Her eyes glittered with silver stars.
Her blonde hair danced behind her in the air as if it had a soul of its own. “I
missed you.” She said.

“I—“ The smile on my face stole the words from my mouth.

She approached me, barefoot, wet, and seeping blood. Then
she threw herself into my arms. I felt alive. Her touch was warm, like an
imminent memory you could never forget. I felt as if I didn’t know who I were
before she touched me. I blew out a sigh, long and easy.

“I was worried you’d be upset with me and never wake me up
again.” She whispered in my ears, her breath all over my neck.

“How could I?” I pulled her tighter. I needed this. Damn
this curse. How did I breathe without her for the last hundred years?

“Pete?” She looked into my eyes like a pleading child. “Are
we going to have fun this time?”

“Of course we will, Darling.” I said.

“I mean,” She shrugged. “Is she dead?” Even with Sleeping
Beauty’s chaotic behavior, she was afraid of
her
. She was talking about
Snow White.

“She isn’t exactly dead.”

“What?”

“Don’t worry. The Queen got her. She will not harm us.” I
brushed her hair.

“That’s awesome. So we could have real fun. We could bring
down the sky, Pete.”

I laughed and hugged her again. “Yes, Darling. We could
bring down the sky. Whatever you want.”

Without my permission, she bit my neck. She wanted to taste
my blood. It’s been long. Even though I hated that, I let her.

“I love you, Pete.” She whispered in my ears.

“I love you too, Beauty.”

“Don’t say it like that. Say my real name.”

“I love you too, Darling.” I whispered.

“My
full
, real name, Pete. I want to hear my real
name on your lips.”