Kender, Gully Dwarves, Gnomes (15 page)

“Oh, I've never felt such a thrill!” declared Toede gleefully as he galloped after his
dogs, the needles on the ground kicking up under the hooves of Galiot. “We ought to hunt
kender more often!”

“Yes, sire,” responded Groag without much conviction, his robes fluttering. He was more
concerned with trying to stay in the saddle.

“Oops! I hear them again!” said Talorin as he and Kronin sat on rocks by the purling
stream that meandered among the trees.

Kronin was fumbling with a pin at the lock around his skinny wrist. His pointy ears
perked. “You're right,” he said, distracted. “I think they've caught on to our ruse.”

Talorin rested his slender face in an open hand and sighed. “Boy, I really do hate being
chained. I really do.”

“It's no picnic for me, either,” said Kronin, now standing, his attention focused on the
barking. “My, they do make a racket, don't they? I'm glad we don't do this every day.”

“They seem a little too . . . how would you put it?” “Enthusiastic?” “Yes, that's it:
enthusiastic! Bad for us, huh?” “Could be. Perhaps we ought to run in circles again.”
“Frankly, I'm a bit bored with that.”

“Well! Aren't we being finicky!” said Kronin. "Very

well, I'll just have to think of another idea." So, with the distant barking getting ever
louder, Kronin took a moment to reflect. He furrowed his brow and scratched his chin. He
looked around. He thought harder.

“Um, my liege, could you think a bit faster?”

“Got it!” blurted Kronin, his eyes lighting. He sat down and began to untie the leather
thongs of his shoes. “Come on,” he pressed.

Talorin looked at him in confusion. “What on Krynn - ?”

“And you'll want to roll up your leggings, too,” said Kronin, rolling up his own.

Talorin, with a heavy sigh and clank of his chain, slowly pulled one foot onto his bony
knee and began removing a shoe. “Well,” he said wistfully, “at least the hounds seem to be
having a good time. . . .”

The hounds snorted excitedly at the spot where the two kender had been sitting, but they
grew frustrated because, once more, they had lost the scent of the kender. They searched
frantically around the fern-covered bank, scaring the daylights out of a small green frog
who jumped into the water.

“Apparently, my lord, the kender waded into the stream,” said Groag, squirming
uncomfortably in his saddle and wishing desperately to return to the manor. “There's no
telling which way they went.”

“No telling?” came back Toede. “You think Kronin has won this little sport?”

“I'm only being practical,” said Groag, massaging his rear. “You should have killed them
when you had them in hand.”

“Bah!” came back Toede. “You give up too easily!” He turned to the rest of his hunting
party. “All right, comb the banks!”

The hunting party split up and covered both sides of the stream in each direction. Toede,
more impatient than ever now, waited with Groag and drummed his fingers on his saddle
pommel while Galiot took the opportunity to drink some of the cool, crystalline water.
“We'll see,” muttered Toede. “We'll just see . . .”

Before too long, the dogs upstream on the opposite side began barking furiously. A
hobgoblin there blew his horn.

“Ha! Now what do you say, Groag?” called Toede as he splashed across the stream on Galiot.
He hunched over to avoid some low branches. “Kronin is not as clever as he - or you -
believes!”

An exhausted Groag, falling to the rear of the pursuing hobgoblins, didn't answer. A dead
branch had torn the sleeve of his fancy robe.

“Uh oh, do you hear what I hear?” asked Talorin as he and Kronin dragged the dripping wet,
impossibly cumbersome deer carcass through the woods. They stopped to listen. Talorin
leaned against a large, rough-barked tree and slid to the ground to rest. “Goodness, they
are persistent,” remarked Kronin. “My poor wrist is starting to chafe,” complained
Talorin, “and I'm tired and hungry - ”

“My, my, such a grumpy boy,” said Kronin. “How do you think I feel? Is there a worse curse
than for two kender to be chained together?”

But then Talorin, only half listening to the older kender, snapped his fingers. “Say, I
have an idea!”

Kronin looked at him skeptically. “No, really, I do! It's a good one!” “Are we going to
need anything special for this one?” “No, no, just some muscle grease!” Talorin jumped to

his feet. His face shone with eagerness. "Well, that's too much. Mine requires only - ahh.

Hmmm. No. We'd need lard for that - “ ”You see? Our situation is dire. Please let me tell
you

my idea! Please, please, please - “ ”All right, all right!" said Kronin, half covering his

pointy ears. “Just keep your voice down. They're getting close.”

Talorin beamed and rubbed his hands. He leaned toward Kronin and whispered, “That
hobgoblin dunderhead will never figure this one out!”

“At last!” said Groag, wiping his forehead with a silk handkerchief and looking up into
the high branches of an especially large pine. “We've treed them!”

“It would seem so,” said Toede, peering up and rubbing his weak chin. He frowned
grotesquely. “Although for the life of me, I don't see anyone up there.”

All the guards looked up stupidly and scratched their

heads. The dogs, which had led the party to the tree, continued jumping up onto its trunk
and sliding back down again - though one of them had actually managed to jump onto a
particularly low limb and now stood upon it on jittery hind legs, barking furiously.

“You're right,” said Groag over the din. “I don't see them either. Can kender fly?”

But even as Groag suggested this, a smile spread slowly across his master's face. “Sire?”
Groag prodded dimly.

“Fly, Groag?” blurted Toede. “Ha! Fly, you say? Is that your theory?”

“Well, no. I was only wondering - ” “Don't you see what they did?” “Um, let me see - ”
“And you think you're so smart!” Toede pointed with a

stubby finger at the various heavy limbs jutting from the tree. “It's obvious! They
climbed along one of those upper branches, crossed to another tree, down they came, and -
” Toede turned to the rest of his party. “Everyone! Spread out!”

The hunting party radiated from the tree. Toede, more confident than ever, waited with
Groag. Every so often he smirked at his uppity attendant. Sure enough, one of the dogs
started yapping at the base of a neighboring pine.

“Oh, I do love it!” shouted Toede as he galloped off behind his noisy black dogs. “We'll
show Kronin yet!”

“I'm sure we will, my lord,” sighed Groag, mostly to himself as another limb tore at his
robe.

“Darn! I almost had it!” said Kronin, hunkered down before a large cave at the base of a
rocky hillside. His own reddened wrist was at last free of the chain, and he was now
working on Talorin's. From the rim of the cave, the two kender had a good view across a
clearing of the surrounding forest.

“Will you please hurry, sir?” asked Talorin, sitting on the glassy eyed deer carcass.
“Those dogs are getting awfully close.”

Kronin rose to his feet. “You're right.” He looked pensive for a moment. “Say! Why don't
we split up? That would confuse them!”

“What? Me lug this deer all alone?” Kronin's face showed that he did not think it was such
a

terrible idea. “You could always hide in this cave - ” “Sire!” “Hmm. I suppose not.” But
he looked unconvinced. "Sir, perhaps it would help you to think if you pretended

you were still chained.“ ”You may be right,“ said Kronin. ”Let. me pretend I'm

still chained. Hmmmm . . ." And while Kronin pondered, the dogs' barking got steadily
louder.

Talorin cleared his throat and held out his wrist, rattling his chain. “Um, in all due
respect, sir, maybe you should continue picking the lock.” Of course, Talorin could pick
the occasional lock, but Kronin was better at it, and besides, he was the leader.

“Maybe,” said Kronin vaguely, taking Talorin's shackled wrist. “But I can't pick locks and
think at the same time.”

“That's all right, my liege. I'll think for us. In fact, I've already got an idea. Why
don't we - rats! We already tried that. Or, maybe . . .”

The barking got louder; in addition, the pounding of the ponies' hooves could be heard
along with Toede's own hoarse shouting as he frantically barked orders at his hunting
party.

“This is going to be just a bit too close for comfort,” said Kronin, fumbling at the lock.

Talorin, still sitting on the carcass, squinted in deep thought. Every so often he
brightened, but then quickly shook his head and fell back to his cogitating. “Well, that
does it!” he finally announced, slapping his thigh with his free hand. “I'm fresh out of
ideas!”

Suddenly Kronin stopped picking the lock. His ears twitched. “Say, did you hear something?”

“Hear something?” repeated Talorin, who was busy scooping up pebbles and inspecting them
to see if any might, accidentally, be jewels. “Yes, but I thought it was you tugging at
the lock - ”

“No, no - ” said Kronin. His ears twitched again. He turned to face the cave behind them.
“I think it came from in there.”

Talorin directed his attention to the cave as well. He leaned toward it to listen better,
dropping his pebbles. “You're right! Hmm! Someone's an awfully loud snorer!”

The two kender stared at each other a moment. Their eyes lit up with recognition. Kronin
resumed picking the

lock more feverishly than ever. Talorin was almost giddy with excitement. “Hold still,
will you!” said Kronin.

“Oh, this will be a good one!”

The dogs soon came to the cave and barked furiously at its dark entrance, refusing,
however, to go in.

“At last!” shouted Toede, pulling up on the reins of Galiot and stopping behind his dogs.
He slid off. “They're trapped!”

“I hope so, sire - ” groaned Groag.

“Oh, they're in there, all right,” said Toede. He stuck out his hand for his bow and arrow.

“Yes, but every time - ”

“Come, come! Be quick about it!” shouted Toede, snapping his fingers impatiently.

Groag handed the weapons over. “They've been very sneaky so far - ”

“That's right! Very sneaky, indeed!” said Toede, nocking his arrow. “And look where it's
gotten them! They're doomed!”

“All the same, my lord, I would proceed carefully - ”

“Bah! You just don't like seeing me outwit a kender,” came back Toede, turning his back on
Groag and peering eagerly into the darkness of the cave.

“You're wrong, my lord,” said Groag, sliding his bulk clumsily off his pony. “Nothing
would please me more. But - ”

“Never mind 'but', ” said Toede, turning back. “Just follow your orders. Stay by the trees
and watch the mounts and dogs. I'll leave you the slaves and the two rearguards. If Kronin
and that other pointy eared pipsqueak should sneak by us, kill them at once! Understand?”

“Yes, sire,” said Groag, grateful at least for the respite. “The rest of you follow me!”
While four of the hobgoblins eagerly dismounted, Groag

retreated back across the clearing to the trees with the slaves, dogs, ponies, and the two
rearguards. Toede peered once more into the cave, but this time more tentatively. His
faithful attendant had given him second thoughts. “Damn that Groag,” he muttered. “Always
ruining my fun! Well, not this time!” Bow and arrow nocked at the ready, Toede padded
stealthily into the cave, followed closely by his guards. Soon they disappeared in the
blackness.

There was a moment or so when nothing much happened, except that the dogs kept barking and
yanking at their leashes, pulling some of the exhausted slaves from the trees into the
clearing. Groag himself settled against a tree and sat down on a bed of pine needles. He
gently fingered the tatters of his robe and sighed.

Suddenly, several prolonged hobgoblin screeches echoed from the cave. They were followed
almost immediately by none other than Toede himself and his four guards, all squealing
like pigs at the top of their lungs and bolting out of the cave as fast as their fat,
armor-clad bodies would carry them.

“My lord, what happened?” called Groag, jumping to his feet.

The answer came quickly enough. Out of the cave emerged a huge, very angry, reptilian
head. Right between its flaring nostrils was stuck Toede's puny arrow. The emerging head
was quickly shown to be attached to a long, thick serpentine neck that slid out and out
until the entirety of an enormous green dragon stood before the cave.

“Attack! Attaaaack!” screamed Toede, his hands flailing the air as he retreated across the
open ground, his bodyguards clanking after him. Meanwhile, the dogs had reversed
themselves and were now lunging in the opposite direction, yelping and dragging some of
the slaves with them back into the forest.

The dragon sat back on its haunches before its cave, its head soaring above the
surrounding pine trees, its leathern wings opening like two green sails of a great ship.
Around the dragon's thick rear ankle, looking like nothing more than a bracelet and charm,
were attached the chain and deer carcass.

“Attaaaack!” screamed Toede, continuing his dash toward the forest.

The two hobgoblins who had remained with Groag stepped forward uneasily, their little pig
eyes widening, their spears trembling. “Kill it! Kill it!” Groag squealed. “Protect your
master!”

The two seemed inclined to head for the rear, but they were pressed forward by Toede.
Planted behind them, he was grabbing at the arms of the other fleeing hobgoblin guards,
trying to spin them around. “Where are you going, you cowards? Stop! Stop!”

By now most of the guards, dogs, and slaves - with Galiot leading the way - had scattered
into the woods.

The dragon kept its glare fixed on the fat hobgoblin Highlord who stood at the edge of the
forest, jumping up and down, waving his fists, and barking orders at the two quivering
guards he had pushed into the clearing. Groag was frozen to his spot.