Kender, Gully Dwarves, Gnomes (14 page)

“The noise did not come from our party,” said Groag, sounding typically haughty.

“Oh? Then who from?” asked Toede. “A kender,” said Groag. "Perhaps more than one. The

sound was made by a hoopak, of course.“ ”Kender!" snapped Toede, his eyes darting about the

field and woods. “I should have known! I bet they're the ones who've been poaching in my
forest!”

“I wouldn't be surprised,” said Groag, though in fact he was indeed surprised to learn
that their quest for poachers might have real results.

“All right, then,” said Toede, handing the bow and arrow back to the know-it-all
attendant, “let's keep our eyes open for damned kender!”

With that, Toede and his hunting party continued on, searching for kender. They saw none.
Soon they were skirting the edge of the dark pine forest, whose lower, horizontal branches
were dead, gray, and bare.

Of course no kender showed, but Toede did spot a second stag just within the gloomy woods,
drinking at the near bank of a purling brook. “Shh,” whispered Toede, sticking out his
hand for his bow and arrow;

Groag handed them over. Toede acted faster this time, quickly nocking the arrow and
pulling back on the bowstring.

But, once again, before he could even take proper aim, another whining scream pierced the
air.

“Damn it!” roared Toede as the stag darted off, splashing to the other side of the brook
and disappearing deeper into the woods. Toede stood straight up in his saddle and scanned
all around him. “Where are they? Where are these blasted kender?”

“They are quite good at hiding,” said Groag as if it were too obvious to even mention.
“You won't spot them so easily.”

“I won't, won't I?” said Toede, straining his eyes even harder. “We'll see about that!” He
turned to his bodyguards. “You there,” he hissed at one of them, “circle around with some
slaves! We'll use them as beaters!”

“Yes, sire!” snapped back the hobgoblin, excited at the idea. He took several slaves and
dogs, and off he went, spurring his pony and hoping to encircle the kender, wherever they
were.

Toede glared at Groag, who averted his eyes. The rotund Highlord led the hunting party
back into the center of the field so that he'd have a wide view of the forest perimeter.
Grumbling to himself, he waited atop the impatient Galiot,

who kept snorting and pawing at the ground with his small, front hooves.

When at last Toede heard the yelling of the distant beaters deep in the forest, he
muttered, “Now, my little kender, the tables are about to be turned. . . .”

The shouts of the beaters and the dogs barking got louder. In trying to flee these
beaters, plenty of other game now burst forth from the forest: rabbit, fox, grouse, even
another stag, all hurried past Toede and his hunting party. Toede ignored them all, intent
and filled with malicious glee. But two of his hobgoblin bodyguards couldn't resist. They
chased and felled the dashing stag with thrusts of their spears.

“Stop that!” shouted Toede, waving them back. “Prepare yourselves for the kender!”

The two hobgoblins looked at each other, then, if a little reluctantly, let the dead deer
lay where it fell. They rode obediently back to Toede's side.

Suddenly the dark hounds around Toede began barking furiously and straining at their
leashes, testing the strength of the scrawny slaves holding them. Straight ahead, breaking
from the forest with the other game, were two small beings running from the beaters and
chattering to each other and not at all looking where they were going.

“What have we here?” Toede chuckled smugly, sticking his hand out for his bow and arrow;
Groag handed them over. “The dogs shall have some kender meat tonight!” Toede nocked the
arrow and drew back the bowstring. He squinted and aimed, sticking his red tongue out the
corner of his mouth.

But just when the two kender were within range, Toede relaxed the bow. “No,” he said as a
contorted smile spread across his face. “No, I have a better idea - a much better idea . .
.” He savored the thought a moment and nodded approvingly. He turned to his bodyguards.
“Catch them!”

The bodyguards spurred their ponies and galloped off. They were almost on top of the
kender before the little people knew what was happening. One of them had stopped to
replace a button on his raiment, and the other was offering him a variety of choices from
his pouches, so they were surprised by the onslaught.

But it wasn't so easy catching those kender. They were very spry, and one of them kept
swinging his hoopak,

eliciting that whining scream. This scared the ponies, which, in turn, nearly trampled
over the beaters as they themselves came forth from the woods. In the confusion, the
kender nearly escaped as they bolted across the field. But they were chased down by two
hobgoblins who held an outspread net between their ponies. The two kender were swooped up,
the hoopak flying - with a final whine - from the hand of the kender who had held it.

Toede, watching this from a distance, nearly fell out of his saddle from excitement.
“Bring them here! Bring them here!” he shouted hoarsely. He settled back on his saddle and
began rubbing his pudgy hands expectantly. He leered at Groag, who nodded, if
begrudgingly, to acknowledge his master's accomplishment.

The two hobgoblins rode up to Toede, the snared kender dangling between their mounts. The
dogs continued barking, straining at their leashes and snapping their jaws only a hand's
length from the net.

“Now what have we here?” said Toede, leaning down. Suddenly his beady eyes widened.
“What's this? Groag! Look who we've bagged!”

Groag leaned forward, and even he seemed impressed. “I do believe - goodness, could it be?”

“It could!” said Toede with great satisfaction. “The kender leader! Oh, won't this impress
the other Highlords!”

It was, indeed, Kronin Thistleknot. Except for a certain regal bearing and minnow-silver
hair, he looked like an ordinary kender, although slightly taller and sturdier. Also, he
had twice as many pouches and ornaments slung around his slender waist. In his company was
a more youthful kender with a gap-toothed smile, as thrilled as could be to find himself
in the middle of such an unusual experience as being captured by the great Toede.

“Good afternoon,” said Kronin casually, swinging in his net-hammock. “Fine day for
hunting.”

“Fine day, indeed,” responded Toede with a sneer. “Mind you, my dear Kronin, the real
hunting hasn't even begun!”

Toede quickly looked about until he spotted the slain stag crumpled on the ground some
dozen paces away. His eyes glinted with a notion. “Bring that here!” he ordered.

The two hobgoblins who had killed the animal hurried over to it on their ponies, chasing
away some complaining

jackals and buzzards that had already gathered there. They grabbed the buck by its antlers
and dragged it back before Toede.

“Now,” said Toede, gesturing impatiently in the direction of his highly prized prisoners,
“release them.”

The hobgoblins holding the net tilted it, and out plopped the two small beings. They
dusted their similar red leggings and white tunics, and Kronin adjusted his furry vest.

“Now,” continued Toede, slowly unfolding his plan, “chain them to the carcass!”

The kender looked at each other in some confusion as two hobgoblins quickly obeyed,
chaining a slender wrist from each kender to a separate broad antler. The kender raised
their arms questioningly, hefting the head of the dead animal.

Toede slapped his hands together. “Now, then, my pointy eared pests, I will give you a
head start.”

“A head start?” repeated Kronin.

“That's right,” said Toede. “And when I feel you've gone a fair distance, I will release
these hounds and hunt you down and kill you. What have you got to say to that?”

Kronin smiled broadly with realization. “Oh, I do love a good game,” he said, looking up
at the fat hobgoblin who regarded him with such contempt.

“Then you're in luck!” came back Toede, trying to sound as glib as the kender leader.
“Now, you'd best be off, my friends. I won't wait TOO long.”

“Oh, I'm sure of that,” said Kronin. “Until we meet . . .” He bowed deeply. The other
kender, who was a bit smaller than Kronin, did likewise. It seemed the polite thing to do.

“Bah!” snapped Toede. “You won't be so smart-alecky when I get through with you!”

But Kronin ignored the Dragon Highlord and turned to his small friend. “Come, Talorin,” he
said. “We must be off.”

The other kender grinned and jumped up and down in anticipation of the sport to begin.
“Yes, sir, my liege!” he said. “Oh, I do love a good game, too!”

The two kender began to shuffle away, dragging the bloody stag carcass - which was bigger
than both of them combined - across the field. At the edge of the forest they turned
around, waved farewell to Toede, then disappeared through the underbrush, heroically
tugging the deer carcass.

Toede drummed his fingers impatiently on his saddle pommel. Galiot snorted and pawed the
ground nervously. The dogs yanked at their leashes. The slaves looked imploringly up at
Toede, waiting for the command to release the beasts.

“Um, we shouldn't wait too much longer,” said Groag, looking a bit concerned. “Kender are
awfully tricky - ” “I know how long to wait!” snapped back Toede. And

he waited still longer to prove it. But finally he, too, got nervous, and so he shouted:
“Release the hounds!” The hounds bolted ahead, and the hobgoblins galloped

behind them while the panting slaves, watched over by two rearguards, were forced to try
to keep up on foot.

At the edge of the forest, the hounds slowed and began sniffing for the scent of the deer
carcass, their dark muzzles sweeping feverishly across the ground, snorting now and then
to clear dirt from their wet nostrils. After a few moments of this, one of them suddenly
plunged into the woods, pulling the others after it, all of them yapping away. The hunting
party followed, the riders forced to duck beneath the low, dead limbs of the pine tree.

“Whew!” said Talorin, pulling his chain with both hands, barely keeping up his share of
the burden. “I think I'm actually beginning to sweat!”

The two kender were slowly making their way among the towering trees of the gloomy and
silent inner forest where only flecks of sunlight broke through the branches above,
dappling the forest floor.

“Good for you!” said Kronin as he also tugged away, taking care to show less strain,
because, after all, he was the leader. “You don't get enough exercise.”

“Oops!” said Talorin, turning his head. “I think I hear the dogs!” He paused to listen.
“Yes, yes, that's them all right. You know, my liege, I think we ought to be making better
time.”

Kronin also stopped, and as he did the deer's head slumped to the soft bed of brown pine
needles. “Well,” he said, trying to catch his own breath, “these low branches should slow
the riders down a bit.” He pointed to the crisscrossing limbs, most of which were over the
heads of the two kender. “But you're right, my friend - ” he casually

rested an elbow on one of the dead animal's upright antlers “ - although I feel certain if
we had enough time, we could pick these two locks.” He looked thoughtful.

“Doubtless!” said Talorin, rattling his chain. “Only . . .” He hesitated to break into
Kronin's meditation. “Only, the dogs are coming closer as we speak. . . .”

“No kender should be hobbled this way,” continued Kronin philosophically, shaking his
head. “It's so embarrassing. And then, of course, as far as the game goes, it doesn't seem
altogether fair.”

“True enough. Those dogs are getting rather loud, aren't they?”

“Perhaps,” Kronin mused, “we ought to do something about those dogs. ...”

“Yes, yes! Capital idea!” Talorin brightened. “And I even have an idea how to do it! We
need only - oh. Dam. We'd need the hoopak for that.” He furrowed his brow to think. “Of
course!” said Talorin again, snapping his fingers. “We could take - ahhh - no, that
wouldn't work, either. We'd need four more kender. . . .”

Kronin rolled his eyes upward.

“Hey! We could try to - darn it! That's no good! There are too many trees in here! Well, I
suppose we could always - drat! I doubt even hobgoblins are that stupid.” Talorin rubbed
his slender face. “Say, how about - ?”

“Um, don't trouble yourself, my friend,” interrupted Kronin finally. He spat into his
hands, rubbed them, and took up the chain again. “I do believe I already have an idea. . .
.”

Toede and his hunting party had now been riding through those gloomy woods a long while -
so long, in fact, that they eventually came to a groaning halt. The slaves collapsed to
catch their breath. Toede scratched his broad, squat face. “It seems,” he said, only
slowly perceiving the truth, “that we've been returning to the same spot over and over.”

“Yes, it does seem that way,” said Groag, somewhat fatigued by the long search. “The
kender apparently dragged the carcass in a circle.”

Toede's pink eyes reddened. “So! Kronin thinks he's put one over on me, does he? We'll see
about that! Leash the dogs!”

The slaves, who had only just gotten comfortable lying on the bed of pine needles, forced
themselves to their feet with a moan. When the dogs were leashed, the hunting party, at
Toede's orders, proceeded more slowly and methodically along the scent trail. Toede kept
some dogs on the outside of the circle the kender had made, hoping to catch the spot where
Kronin and Talorin had veered off. Sure enough, the dogs ranging the perimeter soon grew
wild and loud, snorting at the ground and tugging on their leashes.

“Do you see?” shouted Toede gloatingly. “They've only managed to postpone their end - and,
may I add, not for very long!” He turned to the slaves. “Release them!”

The slaves were only too happy to obey. The dogs, once free, bolted deeper into the forest
in the direction of the fresh scent, scaring up several grouse and other birds along the
way.