Kellan (13 page)

The right answer probably should have been, sure, see you around. But the more I got to know this girl, the more I wanted in. All the way in. She was trying to change the subject from what just happened on her front lawn. God, I remembered doing that for so many years too. Growing up, I’d wanted everyone to mind their own damn business. And when I got back from Afghanistan it happened all over again. I hated the looks of pity. Everyone assumed I didn’t feel whole. They’d been wrong. I was stronger now than before I lost my leg.
 

 I took a step forward, then another. Mallory took a step back. Her eyes traveled up and she cocked her head toward mine.
 

I took another step. Before she could tell me not to or give me some lame excuse about not expecting anything, I slid my arm around her and pulled her close. Was it selfish of me? Probably. Would it have been a whole lot less complicated if I’d just did what she said and got on my bike and cleared out of there? No doubt.
 

But when I pressed my lips against hers all the things I
should
have done pretty much fell away. She stiffened at first, then she sank into me, letting out the sweetest sigh as I tasted her. I felt her nipples harden against my chest.
 

She was still breathless when I finally let her go. Her skin flushed pink and I ached to get her close to me again.
 

“S-see you next weekend,” she said, still trying to keep her tough act in place.
 

“What if I want to see you sooner?”
 

She looked toward the sky and shook her head. “Kellan. I just can’t. I need things simple. You can see the kind of crazy my life is right now. Why don’t we just both do each other a favor and not make it any more complicated than it needs to be?”
 

Tough. Stubborn. Vulnerable. Mallory was all of those things at once. She made my blood run hot as she stood there with that fierce flash in her eyes. She kept her back straight and her legs slightly parted as if she were bracing for an attack. It took everything in me not to take her and kiss her senseless again. I wanted to watch that slow blush creep from between her breasts and color her cheeks. For now though, I’d play it her way.
 

I smiled and let out a laugh as I straddled my bike and revved the engine. I left her standing in her front yard as I turned the bike and roared back down the street. She wasn’t the only one trying to play it tough. The girl seemed to have my dick and now my heart in the palm of her hand.
 

Chapter Twelve

Mallory
 

I didn’t think I’d ever get my heart to stop pounding as I watched Kellan ride away. My lips still stung from the heat of his kiss.  My legs went weak as I turned and walked back toward the house. I put my hand on the door jamb to steady myself then took a deep breath as I walked in.
 

The most immediate crisis had passed. Dad was already snoring from the back room. There was a good chance he wouldn’t remember flinging a bottle at Kellan’s head. I was thankful Kellan didn’t freak. He could have dropped my dad in a heartbeat and he would have deserved it. Something about the way Kellan was with my dad gave me the impression he was used to shit like that. It would make sense. Every member of that M.C. looked battle hardened in one way or another.
 

“He’s getting worse,” Mitch said from the kitchen. He sat perched on the counter eating cold pizza from last night.
 

I let a breath out and hopped up on the counter next to him. I reached over and peeled a pepperoni off his pizza and popped it in my mouth.
 

“Do you want me to argue the point?” I asked, holding my hand up to cover my mouth while I chewed.
 

Mitch shrugged. “I’m just saying. He promised he was going to get some help. You lined up that appointment with the V.A. doctor. He didn’t go. He told you he did, but I know he didn’t. I came home from school early the other day and he was still here.”
 

I wanted to tell Mitch I would handle it. I wanted to tell him the things that used to work when he was little. But he was almost as old as I was when Mom died. He was smart. He was tough. He could handle the truth.
 

I shoved him with my shoulder. “What the hell were you doing coming home early from school?”
 

He smiled. “Parent teacher conferences. They let everybody out early.”
 

“Oh. Hey! Why didn’t you tell me? I need to go to those.”
 

Mitch shook his head. “Don’t sweat it. I told ’em my dad couldn’t get off work. I’m not flunking or anything, Mal. Those things are bullshit anyway.”
 

“Hmm. Well, that’s not the point and you know it.”
 

“You didn’t answer my question. What are we going to do about Dad?”
 

“I don’t know, Mitch,” I said. “He’s got to want to get better. That’s all I can say. In the meantime, you and I just need to keep doing what we’re doing. Don’t let Dad’s stuff drag you down if you can help it.”
 

Mitch got quiet. He lobbed his crust into the sink and popped off the counter. “So who’s the new guy?”
 

 My heart tripped a little when he said it. The New Guy. It didn’t seem to fit what Kellan was. And the minute I had that thought, I realized I couldn’t come up with a phrase that did fit. Kellan. He left me reeling. Breathless. Reckless. All of the things I couldn’t afford to be. We were hanging on by a thread here, I couldn’t let something as selfish as lust cloud my judgment any more.
 

“Is he for real?” Mitch asked. There was a quiet hopefulness in his widening eyes. It felt like a spike driving through my gut.
 

“A real-deal biker, I mean,” Mitch said.
 

I laughed. “Yeah. He’s legit as far as that goes.”
 

“Cool. Like
seriously
cool. He looked like a badass. Is he a badass?”
 

I popped off the counter and faked a punch to Mitch’s arm. “Just simmer down. He’s something all right. But, for now, he’s kind of my boss.”
 

I dropped my eyes. Mitch knew me better than anyone on the planet. I couldn’t let him see there might be anything more to what Kellan was. Mitch counted on me.
 

“I want to come out there and watch you sing,” he said. “
The Wolf Den
, right? Can I come next time?”
 

“You most certainly can’t. It’s a biker bar. I mean, it’s hot.  There were people lined up to get in last night. I was kind of expecting the thing to be some dive. It’s not though. This gig might actually last for a while. And the money’s good enough I probably won’t have to clean houses this month. And I can be there for shit like parent teacher conferences, Mitch. You gotta do your part and let me know what’s going on.”
 

“Hmm.” Mitch turned and slipped off his cleats. In the excitement on the lawn, I’d forgotten to give him shit for not doing it before he walked inside.
 

“Hmm, what?”
 

“Well, that Kellan guy. Sorry, sis. He looked more like your boyfriend than your boss. I saw him kiss you.”
 

Blood drained down to my shoes. “Mitch, look.”
 

He held up a hand. “I’m not judging. I’m just saying. He’s hot for you. I saw it.”
 

My face warmed as I held back a smile. “Oh, really?”
 

“Yeah. I’m not a little kid. I can read the guy signals, you know. That guy is into you. Hard. Just, you know. Maybe watch out.”
 

I wanted to hug him, give him a noogie and call him Stinky. Everything I used to do when he was a chubby toddler. But he also broke my heart in half. Mitch was my brother, he was acting like it. Concerned. Protective.
 

“So, tell me about these guy signals. What else do they say? Because I would
really
like the inside scoop.”
 

Mitch smiled and it speared me. He looked just like Mom.
 

“Oh, I can’t tell you that. There’s a code and everything.”
 

“Man code?”
 

“Yeah. In fact, I’ve already told you too much.”
 

“Ah. So you could be in danger of having your man license revoked? That sounds pretty dire.”
 

“Totally. See, that’s why you need to take me out to
The Wolf Den
. So I can build my street cred back up.”
 

I put an arm around Mitch’s shoulder as we walked down the hall together. “Ugh. You stink, little brother. What
is
that smell?”
 

“Man smell,” he said, sniffing his own armpit. “Comes from sweat, hard work, and testosterone.” He thumped his chest like a gorilla.
 

“Well, gross. Take a shower.”
 

“You think I could at least get to ride a Harley out of all of this?”
 

“Mitch, you’re killing me. You can barely ride your ten speed without crashing through Mrs. Davis’s shrubbery.”
 

“I was seven when I did that!”
 

I pushed Mitch through the open bathroom door, grabbed a towel and a washcloth from the closet, and threw it at him.
 

“Cut the grass when you’re done, Man-Boy,” I said. “I’ll get Dad under control.”
 

Mitch leaned against the door frame and smiled.
 

“What?”
 

He shrugged. “Nothing. You just look different today.  I don’t know. You kind of look happy. I like it.”
 

My heart lurched again and my smile dropped. Mitch’s only widened. He closed the door and ran the shower. “Use soap. Lots of it.”
 

I pressed my back against the wall and sank down until I sat on the floor. Shit. What had I been thinking? I did the one thing that could fuck everything up for Mitch and me again. Things would turn sour with Kellan, just like they had with every guy I’d ever let close to me. I wasn’t carefree like most twenty-five-year-olds . That wasn’t my life. I had my dad, I had Mitch. I had a stack of bills piling up on the counter and probably a foreclosure notice coming right around the corner. If Dad couldn’t pull it together, I was going to need to get serious about filing for guardianship of Mitch. Shacking up with a biker wasn’t going to score me any points with a family court judge.
 

The Wolf Den
came along at just the right time. The minute he got a real taste of the hot mess that was my life, Kellan would leave, just like all the rest. I pressed my forehead against my crossed arms. The smart thing to do was set the ground rules now. I’d work for him. I’d help him bring customers into the
Den
and that was it. Anything more, no matter how my body craved it, would only lead to drama I couldn’t afford.
 

Except I
did
crave it. So much it took my breath away.
 

Chapter Thirteen

Kellan
 

Heidi Barlow looked scared shitless. From the second Tate and I rode up to her house, I knew something was way off. She didn’t come to the door at first but her car was parked in the driveway. I pounded on the door for a couple of minutes before I saw movement through the blinds.
 

Finally, she came to the door but wouldn’t open it. She just stuck two fingers in between the blind slats and told us she wasn’t feeling well.
 

“Heidi, open the door,” I said, trying to keep my voice measured. I wanted to bust the damn thing down. Something wasn’t right. What I
could
see of Heidi had me on edge. Her eyes looked bloodshot like she’d been crying.
 

“I don’t want to get you sick, Mr. Carter,” she said.
 

“I told you when I hired you. Call me Kellan. Mr. Carter was my grandfather. And we’re not leaving until you come out on this porch and talk to me face to face.”
 

Tate put a hand on my shoulder and pulled me back until we were standing in the yard.
 

“She’s spooked,” Tate said. “This doesn’t smell right.”
 

I looked around. Heidi lived in a shitty little apartment in the rough part of town. A couple of her neighbors across the street had come out of their houses and were watching us from their front porches.
 

“I don’t think she wants to be seen talking to us,” Tate said.
 

He was right. With our cuts and our bikes parked right in front of her door, we couldn’t have been more conspicuous if we’d sky wrote our presence.
 

“Fuck that,” I said. “If someone’s giving her shit for associating with us, I need to know who and why.”
 

I stepped back up to the porch and pounded the door hard with the side of my fist. “Heidi, open the damn door!”
 

She did this time, at least a crack. She had the lights off in the apartment so she stood in shadows. I did something that I knew would probably scare the shit
out of her even more, but she wasn’t leaving me a choice. Alarm bells were going off in my head big time and I wasn’t leaving this porch without solid answers.
 

I pushed Heidi’s door open. She gasped a little but stepped back.
 

“We coming in or are you coming out?” I said.
 

Heidi’s shoulders sank and she opened the door all the way to let us in. I felt like a fucking giant standing next to her. The girl couldn’t be more than five feet tall and maybe weighed a hundred pounds soaking wet. She was tough though. She’d worked in a few rough places and had come highly recommended. And she was damn good at her job. Efficient. Calm. The customers loved her. I wasn’t going to lose this girl without at least making her give me a good damn reason for it.