Just the Way You Are (10 page)

I frowned. ‘Why Lapsang Souchong?’

She shook her head and looked at me as though I’d asked a really silly question.

‘Because it’s a word you can work really easily into conversation; we’re in a tearoom after all. Plus it sounds really cool. I read about safe words in Fifty Shades of Grey; if it’s good enough for them, it’s good enough for us!’

‘OK, if you insist,’ I said with a nervous smile. ‘God guys, I’m so bloody nervous!’

They both muttered words of support and there were plenty of hugs and pats on the back. I really didn’t know what I’d do without them sometimes.

After some last-minute wishes of good luck, I went to join the queue. The enchanting smell of freshly baked cakes and newly brewed tea circled my heart and made me anxious to get to the front. Finally, the last two customers carried their orders back to their seats and I approached the counter.

‘Can I have a slice of lemon drizzle cake and some Sunshine Earl Grey please?’ I said, fishing some money out.

‘That’ll be £8.20,’ the smiley assistant behind the counter replied.

I handed over a crumpled ten pound note and the assistant returned moments later with my cake and tea. I did a quick scan of the room and made my way over to a table by the window. I sat with my back to the rest of the customers; I’d be able to see James coming in that way. As I waited for him to turn up, I fidgeted and stared nervously around the room. There was a very real possibility that he could turn out to be a psycho. After all, who asked to meet you after just one Facebook message? Then again, I reasoned, who
agreed
to meet someone after just one Facebook message? I looked over at Max and shot him a smile; I was so glad he was here with me in case things went wrong.

James Kelly arrived a few minutes later. His tall, thin frame was draped in a long navy coat and his liquorice-black curls had traces of rain on them. His steely blue eyes searched the room for a moment and lit up when they fell on me.

‘Ava bloody Clements!’ He approached me with outstretched arms and enveloped me in a hug. ‘Look at you, you look amazing!’

‘So do you! You got rid of the braces then?’ I replied, gesturing to his perfectly straight teeth.

‘Yeah finally! I’ll tell you, it wasn’t easy being the only guy at uni with double train-track braces!’

We sat down and drank each other in. I couldn’t get over how much he’d changed. He’d grown into his tall, lanky frame and had filled out over time. His cheekbones were easily his most striking feature; you could slice bread on them.

‘Can I get you a drink?’ I got up to go over to the counter.

‘Nah not for me, thanks. I had some Douwe Egberts fresh out the percolator this morning. Can’t beat some ground coffee first thing.’

I nodded along but had no idea what he was talking about. I’d never tasted percolated coffee in my life. Betty, our worn red kettle, made a fine cuppa. As I tried to think of ways to broach the subject of the love letters, I craned my neck to look round the room. I saw Max in the queue; he was just about to be served. When he’d collected his and Gwen’s sandwiches and cake, he locked eyes with me on his way to find a table. For a brief moment, I was finally able to see why women were so attracted to him.

‘So what do you like to do for fun?’

I was painfully aware that I was asking questions an eight-year-old would ask. My next one would probably be ‘so do you prefer Spice Girls or B*Witched?’

‘That depends on what you mean by “fun”,’ he answered. There was a naughty glint in his eye I wasn’t altogether comfortable with.

‘Um, well I suppose I mean things you like to do in your spare time.’ I looked down at my caramel macchiato out of sheer embarrassment.

‘I love anything high-octane really; driving in fast cars, jet-skiing, bungee jumping; you name it and I’ve probably done it. Life’s for living in the fast lane, not just pottering along slowly at twenty miles an hour. My favourite high-octane activity though has to be sex.’

I almost spat my coffee out. It was safe to say I definitely hadn’t been expecting that answer.

‘Oh well that’s… good then!’ I wasn’t often lost for words but now I definitely was.

‘I like my sex like I like my cars; nought to sixty in two seconds.’

I stared at him, open-mouthed and shocked.

‘What’s wrong, don’t you like a man who’s honest about his sexual appetite?’ asked James.

‘No I’m all for being honest, I just… didn’t expect you to be
that
honest so soon!’ I replied, regaining what was left of my composure.

‘I believe in getting all that stuff out in the open.’ He leaned in closer to me, stopping on the fringes of my personal space. ‘If you let me under your hood, I reckon I could make your engine purr.’

‘What makes you think I’d even let you get that far?’ I sat back and held my coffee cup over my chest like a portcullis.

‘Come on Ava, we both know why we’re here. You didn’t contact me on Facebook for nothing; you liked what you saw and you’re obviously up for a bit of fun. Why don’t we get out of here? There’s a nice little Premier Inn round the corner, we could have a ton of fun there if you fancy?’

‘No thank you, I think this has been a huge mistake.’ I scraped my chair back to leave but James had other ideas. His hand clamped itself around my arm, making my heart thump.

‘You don’t get to tease me like this and walk away. If you’re worried about my wife finding out, she won’t. She works in London a lot and we haven’t had sex for at least three months. To be honest, I think she expects me to get it somewhere else. You’re so sexy Ava, let’s go and find a nice hotel somewhere and…get to know each other better.’

I had absolutely no control over what happened next. When I felt James’s slender fingers brush against my knee, I got such a fright that I spat out my tea, sending a gushing caramel and caffeine spray in his direction. He looked utterly horrified.

‘Fuck!’ he shouted. ‘You stupid cow!’

‘I’m so sorry! I’ll just go and get some napkins!’

I made a very ungraceful exit from the table, arms and legs flying everywhere. I weaved my way through the cafe, stumbling over pushchairs and stray shopping bags until I ran past Gwen and Max’s table.

‘Lapsang Souchong!’ I yelled as I sprinted out the door.

Chapter 10

I curled up on the sofa as Max pottered round in the kitchen. After the ordeal with James Kelly, aka Psycho-Pants, he’d insisted on coming back to the flat and cooking me something nice to eat. Needless to say, I hadn’t objected.

‘Here you go.’ He came in with a huge plate of chicken stir fry – his signature dish. When we’d been poor uni students who spent more money on trips to the pub than food, he’d figured out how to make it for next to nothing.

‘God, you haven’t made this for ages!’

‘I know, it’s all salmon en croute and Caesar salads for me nowadays!’ He joined me on the sofa with his own plate and tucked his legs underneath him.

‘I know, you posh twat!’ I smiled and stuck my tongue out at him. After the drama of meeting James Kelly, it was nice to be sat at home with my best friend and a pile of comfort food.

‘Gwen doesn’t know what she’s missing here. When she comes back from that posh Japanese restaurant Tom’s taken her to, she’ll kick herself for not having your stir fry!’

‘Do you remember how many times I made this at uni? It was all we lived on at one point.’ Max gave a nostalgic smile and looked at the plate of chicken and noodles nestled neatly on his plate.

‘Yeah, it was usually when we were too poor to go out!’ I replied. ‘We used to blast Oasis out of the stereo as well, remember? I think we played
Live Forever
about three hundred times.’

‘That crappy thing! I used to have to kick it to get it to switch on. Listen, about earlier… Are you OK? That guy was a complete head case, he’s lucky I didn’t knock him into next week.’

I finished my mouthful of noodles and nodded, though I wasn’t a hundred percent sure I was telling the truth.

‘Yeah, I suppose so. He’s definitely not Mr Writer, that’s for sure, or if he is then the letters don’t seem so romantic any more!’

‘How many more guys are on your list?’ asked Max.

‘Two: Adam Johnson and Dean Smith. If they’re anything like James bloody Kelly, I may as well not bother!’

Max’s arm dropped down next to mine and his knuckles brushed against the back of my hand.

‘I know it probably doesn’t feel like it right now Ava, but you
will
find this guy. Even if you have to wait just a bit longer for him to tell you who he is, it’ll still happen. I guarantee you he won’t be anything like James Kelly either.’

I laughed emptily and looked at him. ‘You seem more confident about that than I am! How do you know he won’t be like him?’

‘Well for a start, I refuse to believe that this Mr Writer bloke’s a psycho. If he is, I promise I’ll wrestle him to the ground for you. This is a guy who’s completely in love with you; you can tell by what he puts in his letters. From what he’s said, he’s been thinking about you since uni and I don’t think he’ll let you down this time.’

His fingers laced themselves with mine and he gave my hand an affectionate squeeze. My heart fluttered in my chest; it was rare for us to be close like this but it felt natural at the same time. His thumb stroked the back of my hand and he looked into my eyes. When I looked back, it was like I was seeing Max for the first time. I noticed the amber hues in his dark brown eyes, the tiny little lines that appeared near his mouth when he smiled and how full his lips were. My pulse quickened and I could hear Max’s ragged breathing from where I was sitting. He let go of my hand and gently stroked the inside of my wrist, moving his finger in concentric circles. Goose bumps rose on my arms and an energy I’d never felt before hung in the air.

‘Amira was never right for me was she?’ His voice was low, raspy and almost sultry. He stroked my palm and laced our fingers together again.

‘No.’ I swallowed hard as I tried to decipher the mess of feelings coursing through me. Not even Dave had made me feel like this. ‘No, she wasn’t right for you at all.’

‘I’m starting to wonder if I should give up altogether. I mean maybe Amira’s right, maybe I’m… maybe I’m not good enough.’

His voice cracked and broke and his eyes brimmed with tears. My stomach twisted itself into knots and all I wanted to do was throw my arms around him and tell him how amazing he was.

A heart-breaking sob burst out of Max and I let him pull me closer to him. He held me tightly and cried into my shoulder.

‘Why would you even think that, Max? Of course you’re good enough! Just because she doesn’t think you are doesn’t mean anything at all. You’re a great guy; you can’t let this one experience put you off finding someone. You’ve got so much to offer a girl.’

‘Ava, I’m a university dropout with shitty self-esteem who cries when he gets hurt by a girl! Not exactly the best catch in the world am I? Sorry, I know this probably doesn’t look too cool!’ He drew away from me and wiped his eyes then slung his arms around my waist.

‘Don’t worry about it.’ I felt a sob rising in my throat. ‘You dropped out of uni to do something you love and I couldn’t be prouder of you. Oh, and crying’s cooler than you think, by the way. Women love a bloke with a feminine side.’

He cocked his head to the side and looked at me like I was the best thing in the whole world.

‘Your Mr Writer’s such a lucky bloke, you know that?’ Max reached out and tucked a piece of hair behind my ear.

‘Then why do I feel so scared about finding him?’

Admitting how scared I was felt like a weight being lifted off my shoulders. I’d been so busy focusing on the excitement of it all, the thrill of the chase, that I’d ignored the fears building up at the back of my mind.

‘You shouldn’t be,’ Max pulled me in so I could rest my head on his shoulder. ‘I know you’re worried he’s going to be disappointed in you or you might not be happy with him but don’t think like that. This is one of those things where you can just tell everything’s going to fall into place.’

He stroked my hair and I held him as tightly as I could. I felt him gently kiss the top of my head and sighed with contentment. There was something comforting about having Max’s arms around me. An unidentified emotion was brewing inside me, growing stronger and stronger by the second. I lifted my head up and my eyes locked with Max’s. He dropped his gaze to the floor then put it back to me. A silent question hung in the air:
what’s going to happen next
? It looked like it was going to remain tantalisingly unanswered until his head began to tilt towards mine…

Just then, a knock at the door shattered the moment. Max let out a low growl and took the plates through to the kitchen while I went to see who was there. My jaw almost dropped to the floor when I saw a sobbing Gwen standing in the hall.

‘Honey, what’s happened? Are you OK?’

I bundled her into my arms and she sobbed loudly into my T-shirt. Max came into the hall and his eyes widened when he saw Gwen.

‘What’s up?’ he asked softly.

I shrugged my shoulders and drew away from her so she could tell us what had happened to her.

‘Tom… he… he… Oh God!’ She wriggled away from me and threw her head into her hands.

Max put a comforting hand on Gwen’s shoulder and tilted her chin upwards to look at him.

‘Gwen… did Tom do something to you? Did he hurt you or something? If he has, you can tell us and we’ll sort it out.’

She let out a loud, gut-wrenching sob and wiped her eyes.

‘He’s married so I suppose you can say he
did
something! He screwed me over!’ she wept.

I stared at her open-mouthed for a second, trying to take in what she’d said.

‘He’s…he’s
married
? That can’t be true, he’s bloody daft about you!’

‘Oh believe me chick, it’s true! We were in bed together at his flat when his bloody wife turned up! She came in wearing nothing but a trench coat because she wanted to surprise him but she was the one who ended up getting a surprise! God she went mental! Not only that, he’s got two kids as well; Leah’s five and Joseph’s seven.’