JR (10 page)

“She never recovered, Kurt. Sometimes, I would come home to the old pictures scattered on the table and my mother passed out on the kitchen floor or sitting with a blank stare fixed on the wall. It wasn’t always terrible, I don’t want you to think that, but it came and went. Every day I feared it would be a bad day. For a while, her condition seemed to improve. She met Joe—Elsa’s dad—but, when she got pregnant, her depression worsened and he left her. Then, it never lifted again.

“I took care of Elsa from the day she was born, tried to hide the tough times from her and help her with friends and school. Hell, even now, I check in several times every day to make sure she has what she needs—at least as much as I can give her—and is doing all right. It’s been so damn hard to be away, to trust in the way I raised Elsa. The first year I almost gave up and went back, but I’ve always known I needed to help people like my mom who looked healthy but needed assistance, counseling, with nowhere to go.”

Rebecca swiped at her cheeks when a tear slipped free. “I abandoned them for
my
dream, for a greater purpose. I have to do well. It has to be worth it. This is my only chance.”

Kurt stroked her hand. “I’m sorry, baby. Don’t cry, you did the right thing. Thank you for sharing with me.

Your story explains so much. You’re mature for your age because you had to grow up fast. Elsa had her big sister to look out for her but who was there for you, Becca?”

“I am capable of taking care of myself. I learned from my mom’s experiences. I know what I want and I won’t let anyone budge me from it no matter what. I will be a psychologist. A damn good one, too!” She plopped her re-emptied glass down a little too hard.

Had the table been so close a moment ago? The smooth weave of a cloth napkin soaked up the tear tracking down her face with a few dabs. She flushed with the pride she rarely allowed to seep out. She’d struggled all these years and now the finish line loomed ahead.

The position in Dr. Foster’s office would fulfill her aspiration. She refused to lose it now.

With the key to Becca’s psyche in hand, Kurt backed off. He didn’t want to cause her any more pain. His heart went out to the child she had been so briefly. Growing up fast, she’d never had anyone to turn to. Where would he have been without Luke, who’d been his best friend since high school? Without someone he knew could be trusted absolutely during the blackest moments of his life?

“Come on, sweetheart, I think you’ve had enough for one day.” Wrapping his arm around her waist, he supported her as she rose from the booth. Then he guided her from the restaurant.

She dozed on the ride home but roused when he helped her up the stairs to her apartment. She tripped on the first step, breaking into a fit of laughter when her shoe fell off and dropped through the open rise.

“Oops.”

He couldn’t stifle his amusement at seeing her this way, relaxed and open. The controlled side of her would be aghast. Somehow, that made her antics twice as funny.

He made a mental note to grab her shoe on his way back, then pulled her into his arms before scooping her up. Her slender body rested in the frame of his arms as he carried her upstairs, savoring the way they fit together like two pieces of a jigsaw puzzle. The bend of her knees and curve of her neck rested on his flexed biceps.

“Mmm.” She burrowed deeper against his chest, flinging her arms around his shoulders. Pressing her face into the crook of his neck she said, “You smell good.”

Kurt ignored his body’s reaction to having her so close and pliant. He juggled the keys in one hand, balanced her on his hip, then nudged the door open with his elbow. Flipping on a nearby light, the coziness of her small apartment surprised him. He hadn’t expected her to take the time from her busy schedule of work and studying to make this place a home.

Rich cobalt walls surrounded him with a soothing influence. Fabric accents of all textures littered the room.

Puffy pillows, downy rugs, blankets and even tapestries on the walls contributed to the inviting ambiance of the room. He should have known her sensual nature would require this stimulating environment but, she suppressed her needs so often elsewhere, he hadn’t anticipated it.

Distracting him from his insight, she squirmed in his arms then licked a line of pure lust up the side of his neck. The resulting shockwave radiating through his nervous system almost caused him to drop her.

“You taste good, too” she breathed.

“Becca,” he rasped out a warning, heading toward her bedroom to get her safely tucked in for the night.

She misunderstood his intent and continued to worm closer, rubbing her firm nipples against his chest with a low whimper. By now, his cock felt ready to explode. The eager flesh jumped as he put her down, her body sliding across every inch of his front. Gritting his teeth, he started to strip off her suit while he summoned all the reasons why he shouldn’t lay her on the bed and take her right now.

Head back, eyes closed, she seemed to revel in the heat of their bodies smashed together.

“I want you for myself. Not some experiment or duty.” Though her words slurred, the intent was clear. He needed her the same way. Just not like this.

“I feel you.” She must be referring to his aching arousal, which throbbed in heavy beats against her belly.

Her candor and abandon caused him to tense further. The stiff flesh prodded her delicate skin as she undulated against him.

“God, Becca, you’re killing me here.” He groaned then peeled her shirt from her shoulders, unveiling her naked breasts. She hadn’t bothered to replace her underwear after their encounter this afternoon, which added to the insanity rising inside him. If he’d realized her bare pussy lie exposed under the table at the restaurant, he wouldn’t have been able to stop himself from slipping his hand between her sweet thighs right there.

Probably best he hadn’t known.

Kurt hurried. He had to put her to bed then get out of there before he took advantage of her inebriation.

Several soft pops made him aware of a seam about to give way. He gentled his motions to avoid tearing her skirt in his haste. She moaned and arched toward him. When he had her stripped naked, he clenched his jaw then tugged her into his arms again for a blissful moment before dumping her, less gently than he intended, between the sheets.

She writhed on the bed, reaching for him as though to pull him down beside her. When he fluffed the fresh linens over her, she turned stiff and still, realizing her error. The stricken look she shot him, when she opened her eyes to witness him backing away with deliberate steps, hurt like a rusty knife twisting in his gut.

“You’re…leaving?” Incredulity caused her voice to crack.

“Now is not the time, Becca. Not like this.”

Angry heat rushed to her face as well as the swath of smooth skin visible above the sheet draped across her upper chest. She became shy, withdrawing behind an emotionless mask that did nothing to hide her embarrassment from him.

She spoke in a broken voice so low and distraught he knew she hadn’t intended to utter the words aloud.

“How could I have forgotten? Tonight wasn’t about bonding with me. It was about research. He won’t touch me outside the laboratory.”

Witnessing the anguish on her face, Kurt couldn’t abandon her.

“Shit, I’m sorry, Becca. I didn’t mean to give you the wrong idea.” She never drank, he’d overheard other students joking with her about it a few times in the halls. He should have realized she wouldn’t understand her body’s reaction or the fact that he would never take her in this state, not when she could use it as an excuse for her actions the next day.

When he finally claimed her, she would have to admit her desire was more than a chemical reaction or an obligation during the experiment. Kneeling beside her bed, he grasped her hip in one hand then rolled her to face him. He couldn’t stop a mental grin at her hard nipples thrusting against the sheer covering.

Even after suffering mortal humiliation, her body still burned for him. She turned her head into her pillow but the feeble attempt couldn’t muffle the whimper escaping her lips. The unfulfilled promise of release had to be painful. He angled her face toward him, praying for the strength to do what she needed.

“Go home, Kurt,” she choked out. She blinked, as though desperate not to let the tears filling her eyes leak out. One delicate hand rose to block her vision. “I don’t want your pity.”

“I won’t leave you like this. I’m sorry, Becca.” Stroking the hair from her face, he wrapped his fingers through hers then disengaged her hand, forcing her to see the truth in his eyes.

“I can take care of myself.” Her voice hardened, falling back into the stony mask of independence she had perfected over the years.

“But this time you don’t have to.” The compulsion to provide her with one small gift flared inside him, overwhelming all inhibitions. “Do you have any toys, baby?”

When she leveled a blank look at him, he continued the calming, downward path of his hand rubbing her back. The pain in her eyes banked the throbbing need inside him. As bad as he wanted her, he could give her relief without taking his own as long as he did it fast then left before his libido could take over.

“A dildo, maybe a vibrator? Come on, help me out here.”

As though the contact of his skin against hers added to the muddiness of her thoughts, already addled by the wine, she didn’t speak right away. He continued to caress her, encouraging the nervous tension to leech from her muscles so she could surrender to the flames he stoked higher inside her.

“Beside table, top drawer.” She moaned.

Kurt reached, slid the drawer open then withdrew a blue, hard plastic, sparkly vibrator. If he wasn’t so aroused he feared he might come in his pants
again
, he would have been amused. The device seemed slender and short but, when he considered the extreme tightness of her pussy, he figured it would be plenty for her. He hoped that when he did fuck her, she would adjust to his oversized cock. The last thing he wanted was to cause her true pain. Well, unintended pain, anyway.

He massaged her flat stomach with featherlight touches, then slid his hand lower until he brushed her smooth, fresh-shaven mound. Her hips thrust upward in an instinctive arc. With his other hand, Kurt rubbed the head of the vibrator against her lips. She opened her mouth, taking it inside with hungry sucks. He remembered the feel of her lips, hot and insistent on his rigid flesh. He closed his eyes, giving himself a silent count of ten to calm down.

Then he withdrew the toy from her mouth and shifted his attention to her warm, wet folds. Her arousal coated her now smooth labia, making them shine when her thigh muscles tensed and relaxed in rhythmic pulses as though riding an imaginary lover. She wouldn’t last long. Overwhelmed by her display of passion, especially considering their work in the lab earlier, he rubbed his palm over her hard nipples, before placing the vibrator against her clenching entrance.

“Please,” she begged. “Now.” With her eyes closed, he imagined the world around her retreated until everything but the pressure building in her core faded. Thrusting, he buried the dainty instrument inside her, turning it on high with a twist of his wrist. When his fingers brushed against her swollen clit, she screamed.

Surprised, he gaped at her instantaneous climax. He held the vibrator inside her pussy as she came so hard her tight rings of muscle tried to force it back out.

“Kurt!” He stared, in awe of her intense reaction, until it faded. Then she drifted off into unconsciousness, her whole body going limp.

Kurt’s chest heaved with the breath sawing in and out of his lungs. When he slid the vibrator from the grasp of her still-clutching pussy, he couldn’t resist bringing it to his mouth to clean the taste of her from it. He’d never been with someone who climaxed with a single touch. She slept—or had passed out—so he stood but he couldn’t force himself to leave. His feet rooted to the floor while his gaze refused to stray from the amazing woman in front of him.

He peered down at her resting against the now rumpled sheets, hair strewn around her face, flushed body sparkling with a fine coat of perspiration. She was the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen. While he may not be able to take her tonight, his flesh, harder than it had ever been before, demanded satisfaction.

Releasing the fly of his slacks, he set his cock free of the confining fabric. The vibrator dropped onto the bed beside the siren. He brought one hand up to cup his balls while the other wrapped around his cock. At the first touch, his sensitized nerves jumped, eliciting a groan. He couldn’t believe he had this little control over himself. It was as though he were sixteen again.

He couldn’t make it home like this. Instead, he began to stroke the length of his shaft. It seemed longer and harder than he could ever remember. Kurt spread the pre-come dripping down the head of his cock around in his palm, jerking himself faster. He listened to the wet, fleshy sounds as he thought of Becca. Scenes flashed through his memory. He recalled the submission and trust she’d given him when she’d allowed him to tie her to the exam table this afternoon, the way her lips had stretched around him and her eagerness to learn about the boundless passion she possessed.

With such vivid fuel, his balls tightened in his other hand within seconds, his orgasm building. He must have moaned, because she stirred. She her lashes fluttered, then she peeked up at him through sleep-hazed eyes.

“Are you going to come on me?” she whispered.

He froze in mid motion.
What the hell am I doing?

But, instead of sounding horrified, she smiled her encouragement.