John Donne - Delphi Poets Series (60 page)

IV. MEDITATION

IT is too little to call
Man
a
little World
; Except
God
, Man is a
diminutive
to nothing. Man consistes of more pieces, more parts, than the world; than the world doeth, nay than the world is. And if those pieces were extended, and stretched out in Man, as they in the world, Man would bee the
Gyant
, and the Worlde the
Dwarfe
, the World but the
Map
, and the Man the
World
. If all the
Veines
in our bodies, were extended to
Rivers
, and all the
Sinewes
, to
Vaines of Mines
, and all the
Muscles
, that lye upon one another, to
Hilles
, and all the
Bones
to
Quarries
of stones, and all the other pieces, to the proportion of those which correspond to them in the world, the
Aire
would be too litle for this
Orbe
of Man to move in, the firmament would bee but enough for this
Starre
; for, as the whole world hath nothing, to which something in man doth not answere, so hath man many pieces, of which the whole world hath no representation. Inlarge this Meditation upon this
great world
,
Man
, so farr, as to consider the immensitie of the creatures this world produces; our
creatures
are our
thoughts
,
creatures
that are borne
Gyants
; that reach from
East
to
West
, from
Earth
to
Heaven
, that doe not onely bestride all the
Sea
, and
Land
, but span the
Sunnand
Firmament
at once; My thoughts reach all, comprehend all. Inexplicable mistery; I their
Creator
am in a close prison, in a sicke bed, any where, and any one of my
Creatures
, my
thoughts
, is with the
Sunne
, and beyond the
Sunne,
overtakes the
Sunne
, and overgoes the
Sunne
in one pace, one steppe, everywhere. And then as the other
world
produces
Serpents
, and
Vipers
, malignant, and venimous creatures, and
Wormes
, and
Caterpillars
, that endeavour to devoure that world which produces them, and
Monsters
compiled and complicated of divers parents, and kinds, so this world, our selves, produces all these in us, in producing
diseases
, and
sicknesses
, of all those sort; venimous, and infectious diseases, feeding and consuming diseases, and manifold and entangled diseases, made up of many several ones. And can the other world name so many
venimous
, so many consuming, so many monstrous creatures, as we can diseases, of all these kindes? O miserable abundance, O beggarly riches! how much doe wee lacke of having
remedies
for everie disease, when as yet we have not
names
for them? But wee have a
Hercules
against these
Gyants
, these
Monsters
; that is, the
Phisician
; hee musters up al the forces of the other world, to succour this; all Nature to relieve Man. We
have
the
Phisician
, but we
are not
the
Phisician
. Heere we shrinke in our proportion, sink in our dignitie, in respect of verie meane creatures, who are
Phisicians
to themselves. The
Hart
that is pursued and wounded, they say, knowes an Herbe, which being eaten, throwes off the arrow: A strange kind of
vomit
. The
dog
that pursues it, though hee bee subject to sicknes, even
proverbially
, knowes his
grasse
that recovers him. And it may be true, that the
Drugger
is as neere to
Man
, as to other
creatures
, it may be that obvious and present
Simples
, easie to be had, would cure him; but the
Apothecary
is not so neere him, nor the
Phisician
so neere him, as they two are to other creatures; Man hath not that
innate instinct
, to apply these naturall medicines to his present danger, as those inferiour creatures have; he is not his owne
Apothecary
, his owne
Phisician
, as they are. Call back therefore thy Meditation again, and bring it downe; whats become of mans great extent and proportion, when himselfe shrinkes himselfe, and consumes himselfe to a handfull of dust? whats become of his soaring thoughts, his compassing thoughts, when himselfe brings himselfe to the ignorance, to the thoughtlessnesse of the
Grave?
His
diseases
are his owne, but the
Phisician
is not; hee hath them at home, but hee must send for the
Phisician
.

V. MEDITATION

AS
Sicknes
is the greatest misery, so the greatest misery of sicknes, is
solitude
; when the infectiousnes of the disease deterrs them who should assist, from comming; even the
Phisician
dares scarse come.
Solitude
is a torment which is not threatned in
hell
it selfe. Meere
vacuitie,
the first
Agent, God,
the first
instrument
of
God, Nature,
will not admit; Nothing can be utterly
emptie
, but so neere a degree towards
Vacuitie
, as
Solitude
, to bee but one, they love not. When I am dead, and my body might infect, they have a remedy, they may bury me; but when I am but sick, and might infect, they have no remedy, but their absence, and my solitude. It is an
excuse
to them that are
great
, and pretend, and yet are loth to come; it is an
inhibition
to those who would truly come, because they may be made instruments, and pestiducts, to the infection of others, by their comming. And it is an
Outlawry
, an
Excommunication
upon the
Patient
, and seperats him from all offices not onely of
Civilitie
, but of
working Charitie
. A long sicknesse will weary friends at last, but a pestilentiall sicknes averts them from the beginning.
God
himself would admit a
figure
of
Society
, as there is a plurality of persons in
God
, though there bee but one
God
; and all his externall actions testifie a love of
Societie
, and
communion
. In
Heaven
there are
Orders
of
Angels
, and
Armies
of
Martyrs
, and
in that house
,
many mansions;
  in
Earth, Families, Cities, Churches, Colleges,
all
plurall things;
  and lest either of these should not be company enough alone, there is an association of both, a
Communion of Saints
, which makes the
Militant
, and
Triumphant Church
, one Parish; So that
Christ
, was not out of his
Dioces
, when hee was upon the
Earth
, nor out of his
Temple
, when he was in our flesh.
God
, who sawe that all that hee made, was good, came not so neer seeing a
defect
in any of his works, as when he saw that it was not good, for man to bee
alone
, therefore
hee made him a helper;
  and one that should helpe him so, as to increase the
number
, and give him
her owne
, and
more societie
. 
Angels
who do not propagate, nor multiply, were made at the first in an abundant number; and so were starres: But for the things of this world, their blessing was,
Encrease; 
for I think, I need not aske leave to think, that there is no
Phenix; 
nothing singular, nothing alone: Men that inhere upon
Nature
only, are so far from thinking, that there is anything
singular
in this world, as that they will scarce thinke, that this world it selfe is
singular
, but that every
Planet
, and every
Starre
, is another
world
like this; They finde reason to conceive, not onely a
pluralitie
in every Species in the world, but a
pluralitie of worlds
; so that the abhorrers of
Solitude
, are not solitary; for
God
, and
Nature
, and
Reason
concurre against it. Now a man may counterfeyt the
Plague
in a
vowe
, and mistake a
Disease
for
Religion;
  by such a retiring, and recluding of himselfe from all men, as to doe good to no man, to converse with no man.
God
hath two
Testaments
, two
Wils; 
but this is a
Scedule
, and not of his, a
Codicill
, and not of his, not in the
body
of his
Testaments
, but
interlin’d
, and
postscrib’d
by others, that the way to the
Communion of Saints
, should be by such a
solitude
, as excludes all doing of good here. That is a
disease
of the
mind;
  as the height of an infectious disease of the body, is
solitude
, to be left alone
:
  for this makes an infectious bed, equall, nay worse than a
grave
, that thogh in both I be equally alone, in my bed I
know
it, and
feele
it, and shall not in my
grave:
  and this too, that in my bedd, my soule is still in an infectious body, and shall not in my grave bee so.

VI. MEDITATION

I OBSERVE the
Phisician
, with the same diligence, as hee the
disease
; I see hee
feares
, and I feare with him: I overtake him, I overrun him in his feare, and I go the faster, because he makes his pace slow; I feare the more, because he disguises his fear, and I see it with the more sharpnesse, because hee would not have me see it.  He knowes that his
feare
shall not disorder the practise, and exercise of his
Art
, but he knows that my
fear
may disorder the effect, and working of his practise.  As the ill affections of the
spleene
, complicate, and mingle themselves with every infirmitie of the body, so doth
feare
insinuat it self in every
action
or
passion
of the
mind
; and as the
wind
in the body will counterfet any disease, and seem the
stone
and seem the
Gout
, so feare will counterfet any disease of the
Mind
; It shall seeme
love
, a love of having, and it is but a
fear
, a jealous, and suspitious feare of loosing; It shall seem
valor
in despising, and undervaluing danger, and it is but
feare
, in an overvaluing of
opinion
, and
estimation
, and a feare of loosing that.  A man that is not afraid of a
Lion
is afraid of a
Cat
; not afraid of
starving
, and yet is afraid of some
joynt of meat
at the table, presented to feed him; not afraid of the sound of
Drummes
, and
Trumpets
, and
Shot
, and those, which they seeke to drowne, the last cries of men, and is afraid of some particular
harmonious instrument
; so much afraid, as that with any of these the
enemy
might drive this man, otherwise valiant enough, out of the field.  I know not, what fear is, nor I know not what it is that I fear now; I feare not the hastening of my
death
, and yet I do fear the increase of the
disease
; I should belie
Nature
, if I should deny that I feared this, and if I should say that I feared
death
, I should belye
God
; My weaknesse is from
Nature
, who hath but her
Measure
, my strength is from
God
, who possesses, and distributes infinitely.  As then every cold ayre, is not a
dampe
, every
shivering
is not a
stupefaction
, so every
feare
, is not a
fearefulnes
, every declination is not a running away, every debating is not a resolving, every wish, that it were not thus, is not a murmuring, nor a dejection though it bee thus; but as my
Phisicians
fear puts not him from his
practise
, neither doth mine put me, from receiving from
God
, and
Man
, and my
selfe, spirituall,
and
civill
, and
morall
assistances, and consolations.

VII. MEDITATION

THERE is
more feare
, therefore
more cause
. If the
Phisician
desire help, the burden grows great: There is a growth of the
Disease
then; But there must bee an
Autumne
to; But whether an
Autumne
of the
disease
or
mee
, it is not my part to choose: but if it bee of
mee
, it is of
both
; My disease cannot
survive
mee
, I may
overlive
it.  Howsoever, his desiring of others, argues his
candor
, and his
ingenuitie
; if the danger be
great
, he
justifies
his proceedings, and he
disguises
nothing, that calls in
witnesses;
And if the danger bee not
great
, hee is not
ambitious
, that is so readie to divide the thankes, and the honour of that work, which he begun alone, with others.  It diminishes not the dignitie of a
Monarch
, that hee derive part of his care upon others;
God
hath not made many
Suns
, but he hath made many
bodies
, that
receive
, and
give
light.  The
Romanes
began with one
King
; they came to
two Consuls;
they returned in extremities, to one Dictator: whether in
one
, or
many
, the
Soveraigntie
is the same, in all
States
, and the danger is not the more, and the providence is the more, where there are more
Phisicians
; as the State is the happier, where businesses are carried by more counsels, than can bee in one breast, how large soever. 
Diseases
themselves hold
Consultations
, and conspire how they may multiply, and joyn with one another, and
exalt
one anothers force, so; and shal we not call
Phisicians
, to
consultations? Death
is in an olde mans dore, he appeares, and tels him so, and
death
is at a young mans
backe
, and saies nothing;
Age
is a
sicknesse
, and
Youth
is an
ambush
; and we need so many
Phisicians
, as may make up a
Watch
, and spie every inconvenience.  There is scarce any thing, that hath not killed some body; a
haire
, a
feather
hath done it; Nay, that which is our best
Antidote
against it, hath donn it; the best
Cordiall
hath bene
deadly
poyson; Men have dyed of
Joy
, and allmost forbidden their friends to weepe for them, when they have seen them dye laughing.  Even that Tiran
Dyonisius
(I thinke the same, that suffered so much after) who could not die of that sorrow, of that high fal, from a
King
to a
wretched private man
, dyed of so poore a
Joy
, as to be declard by the
people
at a
Theater
, that hee was a good
Poet
.  We say often that a
Man may live of a litle
; but, alas, of how much lesse may a Man dye! And therfore the more assistants, the better; who comes to a day of hearing, in a cause of any importance, with one
Advocate?
In our
Funerals
, we our selves have no interest; there wee cannot
advise
, we cannot
direct:
And though some
Nations
, (the
Egiptians
in particular) built themselves better
tombs
, than
houses
because they were to dwell
longer
in them; yet, amongst our selves, the greatest
Man of Stile
, whom we have had,
The Conqueror
, was left, as soone as his soule left him, not only without persons to assist at his
grave
, but without a grave.  Who will keepe us then, we know not; As long as we can, let us admit as much
helpe
as wee can; Another, and another
Phisician
, is not another, and another
Indication
, and
Symptom
of
death
, but another, and another
Assistant
, and
Proctor
of
life:
Nor doe they so much feed the imagination with apprehension of
danger
, as the understanding with
comfort;
Let not one bring
Learning
, another
Diligence
, another
Religion
, but every one bring all, and, as many Ingredients enter into a Receit, so may many men make the Receit.  But why doe I exercise my Meditation so long upon this, of having plentifull helpe in time of need? Is not my Meditation rather to be enclined another way, to condole, and commiserate their distresse who have
none?
How many are sicker (perchance) than I, and laid on their wofull straw at home (if that corner be a home) and have no more hope of helpe, though they die, than of preferment, though they live? Nor doe no more expect to see a
Phisician
then, than to bee an
Officer
after; of wkome, the first that takes knowledge, is the
Sexten
that buries them; who buries them in
oblivion
too? For they doe but fill up the number of the dead in the Bill, but we shall never heare their Names, till wee reade them in the Booke of life, with our owne.  How many are sicker (perchance) than I, and thrown into
Hospitals
, where, (as a fish left upon the Sand, must stay the tide) they must stay the
Phisicians
houre of visiting, and then can bee but
visited?
How many are sicker (perchaunce) than all we, and have not this
Hospitall
to cover them, not this straw, to lie in, to die in, but have their
Grave-stone
under them, and breathe out then soules in the eares, and in the eies of passengers, harder than their bed, the flint of the street? That taste of no part of our
Phisick
, but a
sparing dyet;
to whom ordinary porridge would bee
Julip
enough, the refuse of our servants,
Bezar
enough, and the off-scouring of our Kitchen tables,
Cordiall
enough.  O my
soule
, when thou art not enough awake, to blesse thy
God
enough for his plentifull mercy, in affoording thee many
Helpers
, remember how many lacke them, and helpe them to them, or to those other things, which they lacke as much as them.