Jahleel (7 page)

If Jahleel hadn’t been looking down at her with a softened expression on his face, I wouldn’t have felt threatened. But, that look…

It wasn’t the look he’d given me in the mirror earlier, and it wasn’t the look he’d given Water Girl. No, that was a different look: one of longing, warmth, tenderness and, dear God,
love
. The expression transformed his countenance to an extent where no one would ever believe an arsehole existed behind that face.

No, no, no, no, no!

I thought…I thought he wasn’t attracted to blonds. My hair, my lovely blonde hair, I dyed it raven black for this dude! Have kept it raven ever since. So much so, that not many people didn’t know I was actually blonde and not raven-haired. Most people thought raven was my real hair colour. Now he was dating, and possibly in love with, a blond?

God, I wanted to kill myself. Such an idiot. When would I regain my senses? I needed him to give me back all he’d fucking stolen from me—my heart, my brain, my common sense, my strength—so I could move on living my fabulous life of being rich and famous, and stop dogging around over some dude who’ll probably never notice me.

Gaining a bit of resolve, I marched towards them, making no effort to conceal my irritation as I narrowed my eyes on Little Miss Blondie. I planned on being a complete bitch, I did well at that sometimes, but before I could get a snarky word out, Jahleel asked, “Ready to go again? Or do you have another pack of cigarettes you got to empty?”

Dragging my glower from Little Miss Blondie, I looked at him and my resolve shattered into smithereens as another piece of my heart chipped off and floated towards him. He was wet with sweat as if he’d been dancing during my extended smoking break, and strands of his hidden hair peeped out of his beanie.

God, he was so much, so amazing, so wanted,
needed,
so desired. By me.

In the midst of my lusting, I noted something had changed in his eyes and in his voice when he asked me that question; it made me prefer the arsehole part of him more than this part. I couldn’t quite put my finger on it, but he seemed bitter, irritated, and inexplicably pissed—maybe at me or at himself, I couldn’t tell.

Inhaling deeply, I contemplated asking him what I did wrong, why he hated me, and why did he have to be such a jerk, but I exhaled on a sigh, and instead said, “Nah. Done for the day.”

He stared back at me with such unhidden hostility, that I half expected him to blast me with a big ole ‘get the fuck out!’

Unable to sustain his glare further, I slid my gaze to Little Miss Blonde. “You must be JK’s girlfriend, yeah?”

“No,” she laughed cordially. “I’m Krissy.”

I’ve never felt so relieved in my entire life, but I didn’t let it show. I wanted to hug, kiss and give this girl a million pounds just for not being JK’s girlfriend. However, Jahleel obviously had feelings for her, which meant she was still a threat. “And Krissy is…?”

Krissy opened her mouth to answer but Jahleel jumped in with more douchebaggery than before. “Krissy’s just Krissy.” Arching a caustic brow at me, he bit out, “You weren’t clear just now. You’re done smokin’ for the day, or you’re done practicin’? Which?”

If he were anyone else, I would’ve told him to fuck off eons ago, find something to sue him for, lie on him and screw his career over because he had, honest to God, begun to piss me off. But I was a glutton for pain, so I did neither.

Though I did manage to
hiss
out, “Both.”

The
hiss
made him smile; it was the first sign of irritation I’d showed all day. As if satisfied that he’d provoked me, Jahleel said nothing in response, and an awkward silence hung around the three of us, while his eyes studied my face making me all the more self-conscious.

Shoving my hands in the back pockets of my jeans, I contemplated just turning and leaving, seeing that I’d just declared I was done for the day.

I wanted to go, but I wanted to stay. I hated Jahleel’s hostility towards me and had an urge to run, but hostility was better than being ignored…so I longed for more.

I was more frustrated with myself than before I came here. Even when he was being a douchebag, I craved more of him. So, instead of walking out, I grappled for a lie to extend my time.

Casting a glance over my shoulder, I checked to see if my mates were still in drool mode. They were. Perfect. I turned back at Jahleel. “Ma’ mates back there…say they’ve heard about ya’ and want to see ya’…dance.”

Jahleel’s smirk deepened, almost resembling a smile. He knew I was lying, but he wasn’t calling me out on it.

Remaining purposely staid, I stared back as though I were telling the dead truth. He finally shrugged and tossed over his shoulder, “Jason Derulo’s
Breathing
.”

Unbelievable, he was
actually
going to do it. Even though he knew it was a lie, that
I
was the one who wanted to see him dance, he was still going to do it. In all honesty, I didn’t expect him to. This dude was unreadable as words written in water. He fucking confused me.

Walking backwards, he hauled his T-shirt over his head and tossed it at Krissy, flashing a crooked grin at her. Except for when Jahleel laughed at my dancing, his smile was a rare occurrence, I noticed. But I understood why.

Grins such as his could cause fatal heart attacks in women. A combination of extreme sexiness, extreme arrogance, extreme flirtatiousness, extreme taunting…it was just a truckload of extremes. To simplify, his rare but mesmerizing grin could cause serious heart damage in weaklings, like me, if flashed too often.

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Krissy grin back at him. I needed to get to know this girl, to determine if the feelings between her and Jahleel were mutual. I also had to figure out my level of competition, and at the same time, pump Krissy for information to use to my advantage.

With that thought, I looped my hand through hers like a bloody pre-teen and dragged her off in the other direction of the room.

She froze up, seemingly surprised by my gesture, but I pretended not to notice.

Jahleel started dancing, and I knew I should be looking at Krissy instead of him when I asked her, “You two close, yeah?”, but I couldn’t pull my eyes away from a dancing Jahleel. The fluidity, the sexiness…Jesus…

“Yep. We live together.”

Live together?
That sure as hell got me to snap my gaze to her. “I thought you said—”

She cut me off by holding a hand up and smiling, her plump lips as red as raspberries made her smile a dazzling white. I hated how pretty and exotic she was. “We’re, um…His parents adopted me when I was young.”

“Oh.” For the second time that day, I felt a relief so strong, even my joints relaxed. “So you’re brother and sister. Why didn’t he just say that?”

With a slight wince, she placed a hand on my shoulder and warned, “Word of advice: if you don’t wanna get on his wrong side, don’t refer to us as brother and sister.”

What
? “Why?”

All she offered was a shrug.

Well, that’s not weird at all
, I thought sardonically. Unless the love I saw in his eyes earlier wasn’t love for a sister. He must want her to be more to him. But judging how casual she was about him, the feeling was most certainly unilateral. To her, he was just her brother. Maybe to him, she was his fantasy.

Sucking in my cheeks, lost in thought, I decided then and there to find a way to get him to transfer that love over to
me
. Make
me
his fantasy.

I had work to do.

I turned my attention back to Jahleel who was glistening with sweat as he danced with undiluted passion, as if nothing else in the world mattered but how well he moved to the beat of the music.

His well-defined abs contracted and released with every move, his bottom lip captured between his teeth. The way he moved his hips, those feet, the way rivulets of sweat trailed along the wicked tattoo covering his whole left side from armpit to hipbone, the way the big bold ‘KINGSTON’ across his upper back rippled with each flex of his arms… He is lethal. My attraction to him is definitely fatal. And I wanted him so bad it pained to even look at him.

I chatted some more with Krissy until the song ended and Jahleel made his way over. He halted in front of us and nabbed his T-shirt from Krissy, wiping the sweat from his face. Looking at me, he winked—fucking winked—as he said, “Why don’t you go find out what your
friends
think of that performance?”

I. Wanted. To. Scream.

Glowering up at him, I clenched and unclenched my fists, and before I let my mouth say something I’d regret, I flounced off.

Thomas pushed open the door for me as I got up to it, and right before I went through, I cast a quick glance over my shoulder and my eyes unexpectedly locked with Jahleel’s. He, too, was looking over his shoulder, straight at me, his beanie off and one hand raking through his hair, looking as exhausted and defeated as I felt.

His golden gaze left mine as his eyes made a swift sweep down my body, before snapping back to my face with unconcealed frustration. With a slight shake of his head, he turned back to Krissy.

Resigned to the failure of the day, I proceeded out the door and out of the building. As soon as I was back in the vehicle with Amanda and Ferbie, I dipped in my back pocket for my cigarettes, only to find the damn box empty.

Mad at the whole frigging world, I punched the headrest in front of me. Amanda pursed her lips and sagely kept her mouth shut as I punched the headrest again and again.

“Aye, Ma,” Ferbie strived to calm me by reaching over Amanda to rest a warm palm on my knee.

The loving innocence in his eyes was enough to soothe me. I loved my brother so much that sometimes I wish there was something,
anything
I could do to make him normal.

Just as Ben began backing the vehicle out of the lot, Jahleel walked out of the studio shirtless, his white tee tossed around his neck. He had one arm around Krissy’s shoulders as he talked animatedly to her.

His mouth stopped moving when he spotted Amy and Jamie getting ready to leave behind us. By then, Ben spun the Jeep around and started crawling off the complex with two other vehicles ahead of us. I quickly twisted around in my seat to look out the back window at what was happening.

Jahleel said something to Krissy, then jogged over to Amy and Jamie’s convertible—who I suspected were dawdling in the lot because they saw him exit the building. He leaned on Jamie’s side of the car and twirled a lock of her auburn hair around his finger, whispering something in her ear. And the bitch giggled like a fucking moppet. I wanted to kill her.

Our vehicle pulled farther and farther away as we drove off the complex. We turned onto the main road, and I could no longer see them.

“Should I dare ask why you’re doing this to yourself, mate?” Amanda asked. “Take this however you want, Kia, but this, it’s
sad
. And pathetic.”

I ignored her words. “Text her. Ask her what he wanted.”

“Are you a bloody masochist?”

“Just fucking ask her!” I snapped.

“Sod off! I’m not your fucking bitch, Kia!” Amanda snapped back. “You want me to ask her, ask me
kindly,
dammit!”

Remembering she was a leader and not a follower, a domme and not a sub, a best friend and not an assistant, I turned and flung my arms around her, hugging her tight. “I apologize. I love you. No, you’re not my bitch. You’re my only friend and I love you. And even when people choose me over you, like what happened with Chad, you don’t get jealous and go talking crap behind my back. No, you love me anyways, because that’s what friends do, yeah? You’re genuine, authentic and I won’t ever take you for granted. I love you. I’m sorry for yelling at you.”

Amanda seemed taken aback, both by the sudden hug attack and the long-winded apology. I never talk this much and she knew it, so she understood I was being real.

“It’s okay, Kia. I love you, too. Apology accepted,” she said, hugging me back.

Pulling away, I asked politely, “Now, can you please ask Jamie what JK wanted?”

With a roll of her eyes, Amanda pulled out her cellphone and sent the text message. Seconds later, the phone chirped and she showed me the screen:

Wut d hell do u think he wanted?
Psshh.
Am fucking him 2nite if that answers ur question :)
He’s HOT!!
With 3 smoking Ts!!

“Slut,” I mumbled as I shoved the phone back at Amanda.

“Maybe you should tell her,” she suggested. “I’m sure she wouldn’t shag him if she knew you liked him. They’re bad but not
that
bad, Kia. You need to give them a little more credit. They’ve been by your side since you came here, and that spells loyalty.”

“No. I don’t like them enough to trust them. Let her have her time with him. JK’s mine, he just doesn’t know it yet. He’s my destiny.”

“God,” she laughed as she shook her head, “I’ve never known the meaning of obsession until now.”

Amanda’s phone chirped again. She read it and showed me the screen.

Oh, he also asked 4 Ferbie’s #.
(Only God knows Y he’d want 2make frenz with that dumbo.)
DON’T tell Kia I said that! *giggles*
I told him Kia’s very protective of him so he gave me his card 2give him.
But we’re going 2 Pizza Hut with him & his sis now, (sweet!) so we’ll catch up with u guys later.
x

Amanda laughed, “Don’t hate me for saying this, but I think it’s the weirdest thing that the only person he made a connection with in the room is Ferbie. That’s something epic right there.”

Though I usually would, I didn’t take offense to it, because for the first time in my life, I was jealous of my brother. When I’d gone outside for my long smoke break after Chad’s visit, apparently Jahleel and Ferbie had ‘bonded’ through dancing. I was still trying to wrap my head around it. “It seems Ferbie’s better at taking instructions than I am. I didn’t even know the sod could dance.”