Jaded 2: Broken Love Series (19 page)

~

Marcus and I were sitting in the café at work having lunch. Charity had been whisked away with her very married boo. I’m still a little disappointed in her about that, but I think I was doing a pretty good job of masking it.

“So you haven’t heard from him since you walked your crazy ass out of his house
again
to run away?” I stop chewing my turkey sandwich to effectively give him stank face and an eye roll. However, that was Sunday and it is now Friday
,
and I haven’t heard from Troy other than a text asking me if I’d made it home okay
,
to which I sent a “yeah” with no emoji’s or anything
,
so I believe he’s giving me space; besides
,
I think he’s pissed himself. He was so upset with me accusing him of selling drugs. That clearly was a low blow. However, I was also pissed about feeling shut out. He isn’t telling me something
;
whether that something would affect me or not
,
I don’t know, but I’m no fool. I know there’s something Troy ain’t telling.

“L’oriel
,
are you trying to sabotage your relationship with Troy?” I drop my sandwich
,
wipe my hands and mouth with my napkin
,
and run my tongue across my teeth to ensure that I didn’t have any food residue.

“No. At least not intentionally. I don’t know Marcus
,
I say in my head all the time he’s not Shane. Somehow
,
I can’t stop waiting for the other shoe to drop. The unknown is so scary. Plus, I know he isn’t telling me everything. I can’t figure out why. That’s what’s bothering me. I don’t know if it’s to protect me or deceive me. I still can’t decide.” Marcus takes a deep breath and releases it.

“Are you sure you’re ready to be in a relationship? You can’t keep accusing Troy of being Shane. You’re going to have to begin to trust him. I don’t think Troy would purposely deceive you. If there’s something he’s not telling you
,
I think it’s to protect you.” I drop my head. He’s right. I don’t think Troy would purposely hurt me. The look in his eyes that night tells me I hurt him with my accusation. I’d actually braced myself thinking he would hit me when I walked away. Was I ready? All I know is those two months without Troy were the worst. I feel so safe and cared for with him. I’m attempting to make changes in my thinking. I’m over the scars, bruising, and tattering of my bad marriage. However, the wounds are still there. What I need to do is quit picking the scabs. I want Troy on this new journey with me.

“What I feel for him is so much stronger than anything I ever felt for Shane. Even when I think back to before our relationship took a turn for the worst. I don’t want to lose what we have
,
and that’s what makes it so scary. He seems so open, but what if I’m missing signs, what if there’s something that I’m overlooking?”

“What if you’re letting the wounds from your other relationship bleed into your new one? You obviously don’t trust Troy. Maybe you need some more time to work on you?” Marcus said as he gave me sympathetic eyes.

“I have to get better with him
,
Marcus. Without him hurts so bad.” Marcus reaches across the table and touches my hand.

“Then you have to let go and understand. Troy isn’t Shane. Even if he may do some things that seem familiar
,
you have to give him a chance to speak with you about it. Then really listen. And until he gives you a reason to think otherwise
,
you have to trust what he says.” I squeezed his hand.

“I know
,
and I will. I love him. I want to be with him. I want to be better with him and for him. He deserves that. I deserve that.”

I’m so pissed that I can spit fire. Damn near a week wasted chasing false leads. Dame, Jordan, and I spent the entire time off the grid following up on these bullshit leads. Reggie was fucking slick as saliva. This cat has slipped through our fingers twice. I don’t understand how he’s somehow two steps ahead of us.

First, Dame gets a hit that he’s in Cleveland hiding out with some chick he used to mess with. Well
,
we get to the broad house and she says she hasn’t seen him in a couple of days. A couple of days. So he was there? Chick showed us some of his clothes and everything. He was definitely back on that coke. All Dame did was offer the broad a bag
,
and she sang like a canary.

When we were heading back to the A
,
we get word that he was in Chicago so we have to wait to get clearance so we can head to the Chi. Once we get the go ahead we land in Chicago
,
only to find out he hasn’t been there in over a month.

Finally, we get a call saying he’s in Detroit
,
so we land in Detroit. I’m really missing L’oriel at this point and I’m in her hometown
,
walking around and wondering if my feet are walking the same pavement as hers
,
fighting the urge to find her punk ass ex
,
then her weak ass father.

We finally get to the chick crib he’s supposed to be laying up with
,
only to find out that he just left minutes before we pulled up. Of course
,
she was another coke head. We waited two days to see if he would show.

Now I’m tired and cranky as hell. I haven’t had a decent night’s sleep in days. Plus, I spent two days in a damn truck with Dame’s wanna be comic ass
,
pissing in soda bottles. I’m mad because my lady hasn’t even called me since I’ve been gone
,
even though I couldn’t call her back. We all left our phones here and had our burners. I hadn’t given L’oriel the number to my burner. I didn’t want to heighten her suspicions—even though I don’t know how she could accuse me of selling drugs
,
then insinuate that I’m keeping shit from her. If her little ass isn’t the pot calling the damn kettle black.

What I look like crying on my lady’s shoulder about basic shit in life? She wants me to tell her that I know my brother got a drug addict pregnant on purpose to fill some void of not having our mother in his life? That he’s searching for love that our mother never gave.

The fortunate thing for me is that I’ve always had an outlet. When I wasn’t writing and composing songs
,
I was drawing. Derrick has computers. I know Jason never excelled the way that Derrick and I had academically. However, I still tried to provide outlets. I was just unsuccessful in keeping him occupied. I feel like I failed him. He wants to impregnate and continue our bloodline with a drug addicted prostitute?

Then my friend who I loved like a brother betrayed me. She wants me to sit down and pour my heart out. About what? The fact that I saw this coming years ago, but chose to ignore it? I couldn’t face the fact that he’d been so conniving to me, and how he’d let his drug use interfere with the business we were supposed to be building together.

I just need her to be here. I don’t want to pour out my soul. It’s not like I really have much to hide. I was telling her ass what she needed to know. She should know me better than to think I’d sell drugs
,
or was selling drugs. Even despite her accusation
,
I could actually see where she may have thought that. I was willing to let her lapse in judgement go.  I just need my lady by my side. This shit was getting heavy on my shoulders
,
and I just want her to calm me.

No. L’oriel had to bring her shit from her relationship with her ex to our relationship again.

Once I make it home
,
all is quiet. I don’t even check to see if my brothers are home. I shower and throw on a suit. I want to try and catch L’oriel. I know by the time I get in the office
,
she’ll be finishing up lunch. I won’t let her pride or mine keep her from me.

When I walk in
,
I notice L’oriel and Marcus leaving the trash
,
I assume from disposing their scraps from lunch. When she doesn’t look in my direction
,
I call out to her. She turns and a large smile crosses her face. She takes off towards me. However, her gait is cut off by a clean shaven
,
dark-skinned guy in a dark suit and executive cashmere coat. I stare hard at his ass, because this fool has some nerve stepping in front of my lady
,
especially when it’s been almost a week since I laid eyes on her. Plus, the way her pencil skirt is fitting on those hips
,
I was about to have her ass late coming back from lunch. Caught up in my thoughts of L’oriel, I don’t focus on him until I hear him clear his throat. I look at him briefly, then back to her and lock eyes with her again. She looks curiously between me and ole boy
,
I’m sure wondering why he’s standing blocking her from getting to me.

“Mr. Williamson. Troy Williamson?” I snap my head back to homeboy. I forgot he was standing there. L’oriel’s perfume is starting to saturate the area. Her nipples are poking through her top. Auh. My baby missed me too. I need to get rid of this clown. I have to pull my briefcase over my growing erection.

“Yes
,
” I answer, clearly distracted. L’oriel and I are still locked in a stare down with the sexual tension rising around us.

He looks behind himself to see L’oriel standing there
,
and the beauty that has my attention. When he lingers
,
I snap out of it. “Can I help you?” I ask with tension and annoyance in my voice. Immediately noticing my annoyance, he whips his head around. He’s about to make me yoke him up. This motherfucker smirking and shit
,
standing here trying to eye fuck my lady.

“Mr. Williamson
,
would you like to talk in your office?” I look back at the suit.

“No.” If I wasn’t distracted by L’oriel. I would have picked up on who he was right away. I already know what this is about. I’m just hoping I can get him out the way before L’oriel sprints on me.

“I’m IRS Special Agent Samuel Simmons. I have a search warrant to review your financial records
,
and we are also subpoenaing your bank records in regards to the 2002 purchase of Boulevard Records Incorporated
,
under the suspicion of money laundering.” He reaches into the inner pocket of his coat and produces a thick manila envelope. He hands it to me
,
along with his card. My eyes look over to a shocked L’oriel. I close my eyes briefly. I can see all the trust drain out of her face. When I open my eyes
,
he was staring at L’oriel again. Her eyes were locked with mines and filling with tears.

“Have a good day
,
” he says as he smirks and walks away.

L’oriel and I continue our stare down then she turns, making her way to stairs. Shit
,
she was willing to run up ten flights.

“L’oriel!” I call to her
,
only to have her speed up her pace. My heart begins to race at the thought of her not letting me explain
,
and I take off after her. “L’oriel!”

To be continued….

Thank you…

I’d like to first and always thank God. My El Shaddai. He’s always watching over me and keeping me. I owe everything to Him, because without Him I am nothing.

I’d like to thank my family, childhood friends, and Facebook friends. Thank you for supporting me and keeping me encouraged. I have the best support system in the world.

Than you to my husband. The support my husband shows is awesome. He’s a great guy. Thank you.

My little girl. Who makes me proud of her every day. She has the best outlook on life. Mommy thanks you for your encouragement as well. And no you still can’t get half of my book sales. LOL

My beautiful great-niece. She’s always willing to give her AUNTee a hug when I need it. To her beautiful mother. That’s like a daughter to me. Thank you. Thank you for encouraging me and sharing your baby with me.

To my beautiful mother. Who though I know my book is a little too much for you. The fact that you still support me and encourage me is greatly appreciated. Thank you

To my sister and brother. I love you guys. Thank you so much for your support and encouragement.

To my friends… I have some of the best girlfriends ever. Khalilah and C. Jackson (Ms. Jackson). You guys are the best. Your support and encouragement means the world to me.

To my friend and beta reader Ms. Tonya Dixson. You have given me so much encouragement and support. I know God placed you in my life. You would call and check on me just when I needed it. You kept me focused and believed in my work when I myself became unsure. Mere words would not be able to convey my gratitude. Thank you

To all my readers. Thank you for every download, share, and review. I appreciate the interest each of you shared in this story. Thank you

Love,

Renee Tyler