Jacob Two-Two Meets the Hooded Fang (8 page)

Soon all the prisoners were gathered on the balustrades, watching in amazement. More and more crocodiles were flipping over, dead, and the letters on their bellies read
R, I, E, L, W, D, O, P
. Properly put together, this could only mean one thing!

“CHILD POWER!” shouted one prisoner after another.

“It must be …”

“ … The Infamous Two.”

“We’re going to be rescued!”

Even as they leaped up and down gleefully, the prison alarms sounded, and Slimers, armed with slime guns, took up their positions. Then the man who was supposedly the slimiest Slimer of them all, The Hooded Fang, unwrapped his slime-ball cannon, which commanded the surrounding waters. “This is going to be a massacre,” he promised.

On the opposite bank, still unseen through the fog, stood the intrepid Shapiro and the fearless O’Toole, and
with them, hands bound behind his back, their guide, the nefarious Mr. Fox. The intrepid Shapiro and the fearless O’Toole were armed only with rubber-suction arrows, cricket bats, slingshots, and broad swords, all from the toy shop on Regent Street.

“Remember,” declared O’Toole, “Jacob Two-Two says that we are not to set off in the boat until two o’clock. Or everything is lost.”

But what, wondered O’Toole, if Jacob Two-Two fails, as he had promised, to render all the Slimers helpless? What’s his plan? Can it work? So much – too much, perhaps – depended on a boy who was still very little.

Who couldn’t cut a slice of bread that wasn’t a foot thick on one end and thin as a sheet of paper on the other.

Or count the laundry.

Or ride a two-wheel bicycle.

Who had to say everything two times, because nobody ever listened to him.

But who, even now, accompanied by Pete and a stumbling Oscar, was racing through the fog to the fog-making workshop, hiding whenever a platoon of Slimers marched past them.

Finally, Jacob Two-Two slipped through an open door and ran past the furnaces to the Fog Control Room, followed by a breathless Pete and Oscar.

The Control Room was abandoned, as they had hoped.

Jacob Two-Two climbed onto a tabletop and pulled on the Control Switch with all his might. Pete pulled on Jacob Two-Two. Oscar pulled on Pete.

“Pull,” cried Jacob Two-Two. “Pull!”

They pulled.

“And again! And again!”

Oscar pulled Pete, Pete pulled Jacob Two-Two, and Jacob Two-Two pulled on the switch handle. They pulled and pulled, until the handle finally sank to its off position.

“What do you think, Shapiro?” asked O’Toole.

“It’s too late to turn back. We must go forward according to Jacob Two-Two’s instructions.”

So, at exactly a quarter to two, Shapiro picked up her megaphone. “Hooded Fang,” she called out, “we’re coming to get you. Surrender while you can. Tell your men to come out with their hands up.”

The Hooded Fang answered with a withering burst of slime-ball fire, careful to aim over the
children’s heads. “Come and get it, you twerps,” he hollered.

“Wait! Don’t shoot,” pleaded a terrified Mr. Fox. “It’s me. It’s Fox here.”

At precisely two o’clock, the leaky rowboat started out across the putrid, fog-bound water, Mr. Fox, his hands untied, bailing water frantically.

Another hail of slime-fire hit the water.

“One more volley,” boasted The Hooded Fang, “and the waters will turn red with blood.”

But, even as he spoke, a miracle occurred. To everyone’s astonishment, the fog began to lift. For the first time within living memory, the sky over the children’s prison began to brighten. It grew brighter and brighter, until, lo and behold, there was the sun. The actual sun! The prisoners, overwhelmed, reached out – they stretched their pale arms to touch the sunshine. They cheered, they stamped their feet. “The sun,” they cried. “The sun! The sun!”

The Slimers couldn’t tolerate it. The sun blinded them, and suddenly they began to stumble and fall. Their slime-guns popped off here and there but always in the wrong direction. The Hooded Fang fired his slime-ball cannon fitfully, also to no effect, before he
retreated, shielding his eyes with his hands. “Put it out,” shouted The Hooded Fang. “Somebody please put out the sun!”

The sun grew stronger and stronger. And in the water, sparkling in the sunlight now, the Child Power boat struck for the shore.

“Watch out for the wolverines,” cried a prisoner.

But the wolverines, also blinded, tripped and fell over the snakes, and the snakes scurried for the shelter of the darkest, deepest holes on the island. Within minutes, the intrepid Shapiro and the fearless O’Toole, their golden capes flying, were scaling the prison walls. With some help from the prisoners, they easily disarmed and tied up the weeping, blinded Slimers. Then Shapiro and O’Toole sought out Jacob Two-Two.

“You’re marvelous,” said the intrepid Shapiro.

“Wonderful,” said the fearless O’Toole.

“But how did you know the sun would come out at two o’clock?” they both asked at once.

Jacob Two-Two explained that the fog was man-made at the workshop attached to the prison. “All we had to do was throw the switch and cut the power,” he said. “All we had to do was throw the switch and cut the power. Big people who hate little ones or pets or
flowers or laughter also fear the sun. It blinds them.”

Which was when The Hooded Fang himself stumbled into their midst, still clutching his eyes with his hands. “Put out the sun,” he mumbled.

“Don’t pay any attention to him,” said Jacob Two-Two fondly. “Don’t pay any attention to him. He’s just pretending.”

“Stinker!”

“He’s the only one here who doesn’t
really
fear the sun,” said Pete.

“You know why?” asked Oscar.

“Because The Hooded Fang is childish,” cried Jacob Two-Two twice. “He’s one of us.”

“Oh, I never! I MOST CERTAINLY AM NOT!” shouted The Hooded Fang, peeking at them between his fingers.

“The proof is,” cried Jacob Two-Two, “the proof is, whenever he struts across the prison yard, grunting and growling,
he is careful not to step on cracks
.”

“I’m not childish,” protested The Hooded Fang, even as he forgot himself so far as to lower his hands and face the sun. “I’m vile! I’m notoriously evil! And if you don’t believe it, come to my lair and look at my scrapbook. So there!”

“Empty his pockets,” said Jacob Two-Two. “Empty his pockets!”

“No, please! Not that!”

But, even as he protested, The Hooded Fang was seized by the intrepid Shapiro and the fearless O’Toole.

“You’re not being fair,” complained The Hooded Fang. “It’s two against one.”

One of The Hooded Fang’s pockets yielded a handful of jelly beans and the other, a ball of string, eight rubber bands, three pieces of beach glass, five pebbles, a fountain pen top, and three packages of bubblegum.

Found out, tearful, The Hooded Fang bared his sharp, terrifying fangs. He grunted. He growled.

“You see,” said Jacob Two-Two, “you see. He’s also funny. He’s also funny.”

The Hooded Fang burst into tears. “I want my mommy,” he wailed.

Everybody laughed. Jacob Two-Two hugged The Hooded Fang. And the next thing Jacob Two-Two knew he found himself in Richmond Park …

… where weary from his many adventures, he fell asleep.

His father shook him awake. “Jacob Two-Two,” he said, beaming, “thank God, you’re safe.”

“We’ve been searching for you for hours,” said Daniel.

“We looked everywhere,” said Noah.

Emma hugged him.

Marfa kissed him and said, “Oh, Jacob.”

On the way home, they stopped at the greengrocer’s shop. Mr. Cooper was waiting outside, clutching two bags in his hands.

“Don’t tell me,” he said. “You are Jacob Two-Two. You are two plus two plus two years old. You have two ears and two eyes and two arms and two hands and two legs and two shoes. You also have two brothers and two sisters. And here, if you please, are two pounds of firm, red tomatoes.”

“Thank you,” said Jacob Two-Two. “Thank you.”

His mother was waiting at the door. “Where have you been all this time?” she asked.

Jacob Two-Two told her everything, which only made his mother laugh and say, “Jacob Two-Two, you are too much. You’re a dreamer.”

A dreamer?

Maybe.

But that night, after Jacob Two-Two had climbed into bed, he was paid a visit by the fearless O’Toole, accompanied by the intrepid Shapiro. They brought him a Child Power uniform that was different from all the others. It contained a pair of Day-Glo blue jeans and a golden cape, but the
Child Power
emblem was emblazoned on the T-shirt two times.