Irresistible Lies (18 page)

“Okay.”
She pressed her forehead to his chest, and he felt some of the tension in his
body slip away. “Okay. Just give me a second. I need to think.”

Jamie
held her for a minute or two. He could feel the wild beating of her heart. He
ran his hand up and down her back, trying in vain to soothe her.

“What’s
wrong, honey? It’s just me.”

When
she looked up at him, he could see the turmoil in her eyes. “You coming back
into my life has really thrown me for a loop. I wasn’t expecting any of this to
happen, not in a million years. I just need this to slow down. I need a chance
to think about everything and get used to the idea of you being a part of my
life again. That’s all.”

That
wasn’t what he wanted, but he could give her that. He could give her all the
time she needed, as long as she would be his in the end. He owed that much to
her.

“I
can do that,” he said. “We can slow down.”

She
smiled. “That would mean a lot to me.”

“No
more talk of moving to New York, I promise.” He pushed a strand of hair behind
her ear. “We can start small. Let me take you to dinner tomorrow night.”

“Tomorrow?
But...”

“Nothing
fancy, and you have my word that I’ll be a gentleman and have you home by
curfew.”

He
smiled, excited at the prospect of spending more time with her. Dating Grace
would be fun, and it wouldn’t take them long to become serious. That was his
initial plan in coming to Virginia, after all, before he had found out that she
was seeing someone else.

“Okay,”
she agreed. “How about I give you a call tomorrow and we can work out the
details? I’ve got to get back to making cookies with my nephew or he’ll be
upset with me.”

“Deal.”

Jamie
leaned in to kiss Grace, and she met him in the middle. Her kiss was soft and
sweet, and she held him to her like she never wanted to let him go.

When
they parted, however, she was frowning.

“Don’t
worry,” Jamie told her. “It’s all good from here.”

She
smiled, but it didn’t reach her eyes. “I hope so.”

With
that, Jamie left and made his way back to his hotel, wondering why he still
felt like he was missing something.

Chapter 17

“What
are you going to do?”

Caroline
carried Jake back into the room, concern written all over her face.

Grace
was sitting on the floor, staring at the door Jamie had just walked out of.
“Did you hear everything?”

“Yes.
Jake was watching TV.”

“Who
was that man, mommy?”

“Just
a friend, Jake.”

Caroline
snorted.

Jake
looked back and forth between his mother and his aunt, trying to decide what to
believe. “Can we finish the cookies?” he finally said. “I’m hungry.”

Grace
pulled him to her, wrapping him in a big hug. “I love you. I love you so much,
and I will never let anyone or anything hurt you.”

“I
love you, too.” He kissed her on the cheek. “We don’t have to finish the
cookies if you don’t want to, mommy. We can watch
Beauty and the Beast
.”

“That’s
one of my favorites.”

“We
can watch it...”

She
knew she was worrying him. His little hands held her cheeks, and she smiled,
trying to reassure him that everything was all right. “I have a better idea,
baby. Let’s take a little trip, instead.”

“Where
are you gonna go?” Caroline asked, leaning against the counter. “We should stay
here and talk about this. We need to come up with a plan to get you-know-who to
leave you alone.”

Grace
put her finger to her lips, not wanting to discuss any of this in front of
Jake. She needed to keep him calm.

“We’re
going to go to grandma and grandpa’s,” she told him. “It will be fun to spend
some time with them, don’t you think, Jake? I know grandpa wants to spend some
boy time with you since he’s been surrounded by girls his whole life.”

Jake
giggled, scrunching up his nose. “Yeah, I love to see grandpa because he’s a
boy like me. We can watch sports and play baseball outside in the grass.”

“Exactly.
It will be so much fun. We can surprise them.”

Caroline
raised an eyebrow. “Um, Grace, you aren’t actually thinking of going to see mom
and dad, are you? That’s like, a seven-hour drive.”

“So?
I’m not tired.”

“That’s
crazy. Besides, they aren’t even home. They are on a cruise, remember? They
will be gone all week.”

“Oh.
Well, that’s fine. I have a key to the house.” She stood up, holding Jake’s
hand. “We’re going to go pack.”

Caroline
put a hand on her shoulder to stop her. “This is no time to take a vacation,
Grace.”

“It’s
not a vacation, Caroline. I’m unemployed, remember? I can look for a job in New
York. Now is as good of a time as any to go home again.”

Caroline
gasped. “You can’t be serious! You can’t move back to New York. Your life is
here!”

Grace
brushed past her, heading toward the bedroom. “Jake, go to your room and put
all of your favorite things on top of your bed, okay?”

“Okay,
I can do it.” He ran off excitedly like a man on a mission.

Caroline
followed behind Grace as she made her way into her bedroom.

“Grace,
this is crazy!”

Grace
really didn’t think so. She was thinking this was the best idea she had had in
a long time. She had nothing holding her to Virginia anymore. She had no job,
and her sister would be getting married and moving on with her life. Grace
needed to start fresh, and maybe that meant going back to where it all started.
Her parents would help her get off her feet again, and she could build a new
life for her and Jake.

Moving
had worked out well for her the first time. She could do it again.

“I’ll
get a job in New York,” she told Caroline, throwing random clothes into a
duffel bag she pulled from the back of her closet. “Maybe I can try finding
something in the city.”

“Why
not here?”

“I’ve
had enough of this place.”

“Don’t
say that.”

Grace
folded her clothes in a rush, empowered with her decision. “It doesn’t mean
I’ve had enough of you, Cara. I just feel that there’s nothing here for me
anymore. I’ve given it five years, and look where I am. Right back where I
started. No job, no boyfriend, just me and Jake, and now you’re moving out and
moving on... It’s time for me to do the same.”

Caroline
watched her pack, shaking her head. “I would take this seriously if this was a
decision you had made after giving it some real thought, but clearly you
haven’t. Grace, sit down for a few minutes and take some deep breaths. You just
quit your job, and Jamie just saw Jake for the first time. Your allowed to
panic, but don’t do something you’re going to regret.”

Grace
almost smiled, because Caroline just didn’t get it. She wasn’t panicking. She
was having a moment of perfect clarity.

“Jake
will be safer in New York,” she told her sister.

“How?
Jamie lives in New York.”

“Yeah,
but he’s pretty far upstate.”

“So?
You ran into him in Virginia. What makes you think the same thing won’t happen
when you’re in the same state?”

That
gave Grace pause, but only for a moment. “So we won’t stay in New York. It will
just be a halfway point. I won’t have to pay rent for a few weeks, and I can
use that time to find a job somewhere else. Maybe I’ll do something crazy, like
go to California.” She smiled dreamily, zipping up her duffel bag. “Jake would
love it there, with the ocean and warm weather...”

Caroline
grabbed the bag away from Grace, frustrated with her positive attitude. “This
is an overreaction. Do you realize that? You don’t need to move away over this.
Jamie isn’t worth that. You’re being reckless. You child’s life is here.”

Grace
snatched back her bag, anger coming over her hot and quick. “I don’t want Jamie
to find out about Jake. I don’t want him to know, not ever.”

Jamie’s
face when he had seen Jake for the first time said it all. He had looked
scared, terrified even. When he was questioning Grace to make sure that Jake
was who she said he was, she knew the answer he wanted to hear. She had heard
his sigh of relief when he accepted her lie. He didn’t want a child, much less her
child. That would never be okay with her. She would remember that reaction for
the rest of her life, and it was something she would never expose her son to.

The
thought almost made her break down, but she held it together. She had to hold
it together until she got them out of this house, out of this town. She had a
lot of packing to do, and she welcomed the distraction.

“I
think you should tell him,” Caroline said.

Grace
spun to face her sister when she heard the words, shocked. “I never thought I’d
hear you say that.”

“Me
either.” Caroline bit her lip, on the verge of tears. “Can we just talk about
this, please? I don’t want you to go, not because of this.”

“Caroline,
it’s not like I won’t see you again. I’ll call you as soon as I get to mom and
dad’s house. Please, don’t make this harder than it has to be.”

“Tell
Jamie.”

“Caroline,
no.”

“Maybe
we are underestimating him. Maybe he will freak out and then he’ll get over it,
did you ever think of that? He can’t be mad at you forever.”

“Oh,
yes he can.” She pulled her shoes out of her closet in one swift motion. “This
would ruin his entire life. I can’t take his bachelorhood away from him. He
would resent me and resent Jake.”

“You
don’t know that.”

“I
saw his face when he saw Jake, Caroline. So did you. All the color drained from
it, like he saw a goddamn ghost.”

Now
Grace was getting really angry, and emotion was the very thing she was trying
to avoid. She told herself to just keep packing.

“Okay.
I saw his face, but that doesn’t mean anything. How would you feel if someone
came up to you and presented you with a four-year-old you never knew you had?
Shock is a normal reaction.”

“Stop
defending him!” Grace was trying not to raise her voice, but she couldn’t help
it. “You have been against Jamie from day one, and you are not allowed to
switch sides now. You have to be on my side. You are my sister.”

“I
am on your side!” Caroline wiped a tear off her cheek, her voice cracking. “I
just don’t want you to leave! I think it’s a mistake, Grace. You can’t live
this way forever. You can’t just run away from your problems. You always do this!”

“I
don’t always run away.”

“Yes,
you do. That’s what you did five years ago, and it’s what you’re doing now. It
was okay then, because you were young and scared, but you’re an adult now, and
you’re a mother. You need to face your problems. What kind of example do you
think this sets for Jake?”

Ouch.

Grace
zipped up her bags. “I’ll come for the rest of my stuff some other time. This
is all I need for now.”

“Please
don’t do this.”

“I
have to. I hope you’ll understand someday.”

Jake
walked into the room, smiling wide. “Mommy, I put all my superheroes on the bed
and my dragons, too.”

“Great,
let’s go pack it up so we can take it to grandma and grandpa’s house. Caroline,
can you help me pack up the car?”

Her
sister shook her head, her arms crossed over her chest. “I can’t. I can’t help
you leave like this.”

“Fine.
I’ll do it myself. Come on, Jake.”

Grace
understood that Caroline was only trying to help, but she couldn’t second-guess
herself now. She had made her choice, and that was that.

GRACE
LEFT THE house around sundown. It took longer than she had hoped to pack up
Jake’s belongings. She left most of her things at the apartment, knowing she
would have to come back and get them, as there was not enough room in her car.

Still,
once the car was packed she couldn’t help thinking that she had accumulated
very little after five years. It was kind of sad, really. She had thought she
had built a life for herself and her son in Virginia, but really, she hadn’t.
It was all just stuff, nothing that truly meant anything to her.

What
did it matter if her stuff was in Virginia or New York?

“Why
are we going to grandpa and grandma’s?”

Jake’s
question didn’t come as a surprise, but it did pull Grace from thoughts as she
drove North along the quiet highway.

“Because
they miss us. They want to spend more time with us.” She reached over and
mussed up his hair. “They miss you, especially.”

She
had hoped for a smile, but Jake’s mood had turned sour after the first hour of
the drive. “I don’t want to go. I want to live with Aunt Caroline!”

“What’s
wrong with grandma and grandpa? We love grandma and grandpa. They are the
coolest.”

“But
I love Aunt Caroline. She’s my friend!”

“You’ll
still get to see her sweetheart, we are just going to try something new. You’ll
get to make new friends!”

“No!
No! No!”

Jake
started wriggling around in his seat, on the verge of a very bad tantrum.
Fortunately, his tantrums were few and far between, but this was the last thing
Grace wanted to deal with when she had so much on her mind.

“I
want to go back! Turn around!” Jake was crying, throwing his little fists in
the air.

Grace
took a deep breath, trying to steel herself for a battle. “I’m not turning
around. Be a good boy please, I’m trying to drive.”

“But...
but I wanna go home! I wanna make cookies and watch
Beauty and the Beast
.” Jake was really crying now, his sobs making
the car seem much smaller.

Grace
pulled over to the side of the road and thought about turning around. What if
this was all a mistake, like Caroline said? Maybe she was just running away
from her problems. Maybe this wasn’t going to solve anything after all.

What
if leaving wasn’t enough to get her over Jamie? Had it really worked the first
time? Had there ever really been a time when she wasn’t in love with him?

I’m doing this for you, Jake. I’m
trying to protect you.

She
wished Jake would understand that someday, but he would never know. He would
never know about Jamie or know the real reason they were leaving Virginia
tonight. She would make sure of that.

Her
son would always feel wanted.

She
released Jake from his car seat and pulled him onto her lap, holding him
tightly to her. “Don’t cry, baby. I know you’re sad, but this is going to be an
adventure.”

That
got his attention. He sniffled. “An adventure? What kind of adventure?”

“Well,
moving to a new place is very exciting. You get to have a new bedroom, and you
have to make sure that all of your toys have a special place there. You get to
go to a new school and meet all new people, and some of them will be your best
friends.” She was making this up as she went along, but by the look on Jake’s
face it was working. “Moving is a big job.”