Interrupted (The Progress Series) (15 page)

Now ignoring the fumble, she rubbed gently against the hair on his navel. Moving outward, tickling the skin near his hips, she tugged on his belt loop and smiled. Undoing the button on his jeans and unzipping his fly, her hand moved down the front of his boxer briefs.

“Slow, Charlie. Slower. I’m not going anywhere.”

Lying down beside each other, they continued kissing, slowly and profoundly. Charlie could feel a clench between her thighs as he continued his deliberate torment.

Charlie rolled over and slung her leg over his hips. She aligned herself on top of him, straddling his torso. She ran her hands down his chest and pulled back from kissing him briefly so she could pull his shirt over his head.

Breaking away from his mouth and straightening her posture, Charlie pulled off her dress. Sitting up in only her red satin bra and matching panties, she whispered, “I want you to look at me.”

Taking his hand and putting it between her legs, she guided his fingers, slipping them underneath the satin. His eyes closed as he swept his fingers across her sex, releasing another rush of impatience. “Can you feel what you do to me?” Her face toward the moon, she thrust her hips deeper until his fingers were completely buried inside of her. Her insides constricted just as he pulled his fingers out again.

Moving her back down to the blanket, he swiftly removed his jeans and boxers. He pulled down her panties and unhooked her bra in the front.

“I need you, Sam,” she whispered. “Please. I can’t wait any longer.” She could feel his erection firmly against her thigh.

He spread her thighs with his knees and eased into her. Her back arched and her nipples hardened as he was now resting in the deepest part of her. She wrapped her legs around him as he slowly propelled himself in and out.

He slid his arms behind her back, lifting her while he got on his knees. Face to face, his desire was immense as their torsos locked. Allowing their chests to brush against each other, she planted her knees on the ground and took control.

She raised her hips up once and down again. Placing her hands on his face, she whispered again, “I want you to watch me.” Her eyes boring into his, she lifted once more, and clenched down again. He moaned and she smiled. “This is all for you.”

She picked up pace, her breasts springing against him, then stopped again. He groaned in agony. “Am I teasing you?” she said, smiling and staring into his eyes. She lifted once more and back down.

“Yes.”

Taking him down to the quilt, she straddled him. Her pace was tantalizing as she didn’t want the feeling to fade. He watched her circling hips against his, gripping them to deepen his penetration as he flexed his thighs. “I don’t want to come yet, Charlie.”

The words echoed in her ears as her smile left her face. “But I want you to. I need this.” With those words, she began again, her head tilted back and her breasts following each burst of momentum. He grabbed her hips tighter and found her eyes.

“My beautiful Charlie.”

Her pulse became rapid as she found the spot that would be her undoing. It mounted quickly and she could feel herself verging on climax just as she could feel him stretching her further. “I’m going to come, Sam.”

“Don’t stop,” he breathed.

And with her last constriction, Samuel arched his back and came inside of her.

*

Barely catching his breath, Samuel covered her with his shirt and poured a glass of wine. Propped up on his side, he lay on the blanket and watched Charlie try to collect herself. He smiled and exposed one of her nipples as she giggled. He poured a small amount of wine on it and sucked it off, nipping at her sore and sensitive breast.

“Ah! Knock it off,” she laughed.

He sat back, grinning at Charlie’s curvaceous form in the moonlight as a single pink petal from the crabapple tree fell to her side. In the air was a fine mist, and he looked up only to see that the moon was now invisible behind a cloud cover.

“You amaze me,” he said.

Charlie reached for his glass and stole a sip of his wine. “You’re not so bad, yourself.”

He smiled. “I’m just waiting for you to go all crazy on me.”

She laughed. “Oh, you haven’t noticed it yet? I’m crazy, all right.”

“Well then, you’re
my
flavor of crazy.” He approached her lips, and inches from her face, whispered, “I love—,” just before closing his lips to hers.

Charlie’s eyes fluttered and her breath caught.

“Oh god. I’m so sorry. It’s too soon. It was the moment…” he said after seeing the panic on Charlie’s face.

She shook her head. “No, Sam. I don’t know what it is that I feel, but I know I never want it to go away. And, if that’s love, then…” she spoke softer, “then, I love you, too. It’s just a bit of uncharted territory for me.” After a pause, she continued in a whisper, “It’s too soon for me to say it, but that doesn’t mean I don’t feel it.”

He wrapped himself around her.

“Samuel, I…I think I should tell you something.”

“What?” he asked hesitantly.

“Don’t worry, it’s nothing about us. At least, I hope it won’t affect us.” The light rain threatening her warmth, she grabbed his shirt and put it on.

“Okay. Tell me.”

“But I don’t want you to look at me as something…well, as a victim. I don’t want you to think of me as something used and frail.”

“Jesus. What is it?”

Letting out a sigh, she spoke. “I was raped. A very long time ago, when I was still a little girl.” She stopped and searched his face for a reaction. He pursed his mouth with a quick blink and she continued. “And, I think something in me snapped. At first, it was confusing. I was terrified.” She lowered her head. “But eventually, after realizing that it wasn’t my fault, I was able to cope with it. I recognized that I
was
a victim, but then I
refused
to be one. I even still considered myself a virgin after that. I didn’t want to believe that someone had taken something so sacred from me. And it wasn’t
me
that he got that night, it was just my body.” She shook her emerging tears away. “I guess in some way, I’ve always had to be a fighter.”

She lifted her head to him and his eyes weren’t filled with worry. He didn’t seem uncomfortable, nor did he seem to pity her. So she continued.

“I still carry it with me today. It will be something I always remember. But it was because of that day that I’ve been able to
snap
when I need to. I disconnect myself from the emotions. When I’m backed into a corner, I’m able to dig into my mind and pull out tenacity that…that never surfaces until I really need it. Which has actually been much more frequent in the past few months. Like that night at the hospital with that doctor.” She scratched her temple. “Am I even making any sense anymore?”

“Yes. I understand. And I don’t pity you, Charlie. I’m not ashamed of you and I don’t consider you used and frail,” he whispered softly. “Did they ever catch the guy?”

“No. I mean, he was a friend of the family, but no one that I have to see often. In fact, I think I’ve only seen him once since that day. There are really only two people that know about it…well, besides him and me. I never told my family, although I think Sabrina knew something happened.”

Sam threw himself onto his back and sighed. “I’m not going to pretend it doesn’t kill me to hear that someone hurt you. I’m not going to sit back and tell you I don’t want to hunt him down and kick the living shit out of him. I’m actually using all the restraint I have right now to keep this a calm and sensible conversation.” Charlie could hear the frustration in his tone. “It makes so much more sense now—you know, where your backbone comes from.” His thoughts seemed to linger before he continued. “Almost like that saying,
adapt to survive
.”

Charlie’s face softened, knowing that he understood.

“The way you spoke to that doctor, the way you hold yourself with such confidence, and the way that other people look up to you—” He pulled a loose hair behind her ear. “You’re a beautifully amazing, stunning, and mature woman, Charlie Johnson. And I can say, without a doubt, that I am completely in love with you,” he said as he pulled her down to the blanket again with gentle kisses.

Several months passed. Charlie and Samuel rarely spent a day apart. She moved into her new apartment, and eventually Samuel did, too. After her cast was removed, she dove into her new job effortlessly.

She successfully quit smoking with Samuel’s help, and her impressive performance on the job took her from a Caretaker to a Leasing Consultant to a Property Manager. She and Samuel lived on-site at Willow Hills in Eagan, the property she ran. The eighty-eight unit building had few amenities, but it was her baby. In her mind, she had found something worthy of a grown-up, full-time job, and she was good at it. Willow Hills had started as a 1970s-constructed, run-down fixer-upper, and Charlie was told to hold a higher standard than the previous manager had. She followed through to such an extreme that even the president of the company had no idea how she had done it.

She continued to spend lazy weekends with Samuel. Some days they lay in bed all day watching movies; others, they went into the second bedroom where they had set up two easels and would draw together. Her job required her to work some weekends, but she continued to visit with her father as often as time allowed.

They had settled into a comforting routine, and Charlie was holding out the hope that some day Samuel would ask her to marry him. He gave her a feeling of solidarity and contentment, and he continued to find new ways to make her stomach flutter. More than anything she knew that she loved him and he loved her.

*

Christmas was in two days. Bill was in the hospital trying to recover from surgery to remove his colon, but things weren’t looking good. The doctors couldn’t stay ahead of the cancer, and it was completely consuming both his body and his mind.

*

With Christmas gifts bundled up in both their arms, Charlie and Samuel made their way through the hospital doors. Silence occupied the elevator. Charlie was trying to work up the courage she needed to pretend like everything was normal, and that it might not be the last Christmas she would spend with her dad.

Sabrina and Karen were already in the room when they turned the corner. Sabrina brought a small lit Christmas tree made from green feathers, and she was putting tiny bulbs on it when they entered.

“Merry Christmas!” Sabrina said, hugging Charlie.

“Oh, what a good idea! I love the tree, Sabrina,” said Charlie.

Bill, lying in the hospital bed, looked up and smiled weakly. He lifted his arm to wave, but that only made the machines connected to him beep louder. He quickly put his arm back down.

“Hey, you two,” Bill said.

“Merry Christmas, Pops.” Charlie bent down and gave her dad a hug.

“I brought some banana bread and some cheese and crackers,” said Karen.

“All right! Then let’s get this party started!” Charlie handed out each gift to her family. Hospital staff had brought folding chairs to the room, and they circled the bed.

Bill looked weak and gray. He hadn’t shaved for several weeks, and his beard was almost white. Most of his hair was gone due to the radiation treatments, and he didn’t touch a morsel of food the entire afternoon.

“Where’s your Manhattan, Pops?” Charlie asked with a wink.

“Wouldn’t that be nice? The best Christmas gift ever, I think,” he managed to say.

“When you get home I’m sure Mom can make you one, with a cherry even.”

Karen nodded and turned toward the window.

I hadn’t realized it was this bad. This happened so fast. Where have I been? Have I been this busy? Why haven’t I noticed that it won’t be long now?

“Well, this is cozy!” Charlie said. “I’m glad we were all able to spend Christmas together. When are you going home?”

“Probably some time today or tomorrow. They’ll have to transport him with a hospital van, because he has to have all of these machines come with him. We’ll have a nurse come to the house a couple times a day,” Karen said.

“Well, that’s good! You’ll get that drink sooner than you thought.”

*

One by one, following their tradition, her family opened gifts. Socks, sweatshirts, mittens, framed photos; everyone
seemed
genuinely enthused with the afternoon, regardless of what was going on in their heads. They all put on brave and smiling faces despite their surroundings.

“I’m going to go get some coffee,” Charlie said. “Anyone need anything?”

“Nope, we’re good,” Sabrina said.

Charlie’s sole mission was not a cup of coffee. She had to find her dad’s doctor, and fast. She needed answers. Answers that she knew her mother couldn’t admit as factual, even if she understood what they were telling her.

“Excuse me; are you William Johnson’s doctor?”

“Yes,” said the gentleman in the white coat.

“Hi, I’m his daughter, Charlie. I was wondering if I could ask you a question.”