Intensity (16 page)

Clanking glass caused my high-strung body to jerk, slamming my shoulder into the wall. I whipped around and caught Mr. I’ll-Just-Have-a-Casual-Drink, standing behind a bar in the corner. His silence and indifference as he sipped from the glass ratcheted another fire in my belly. Not missing a beat, his intense scrutiny remained in a standoff with my obvious fury.

“What do you want from me?” His response rolled over me and sweltered.

“I could ask you the same thing—sleep next to me every night—
naked
—not good enough for you—
sex tease
.”

He slammed back two more shots before he countered, “What’s your
real
question, Serena?”

Damn, his sarcastic remark and the tension brewing for so long over-circuited my brain, blowing my fuse. My live-wired, zapping heart charged in, taking over my mouth.

“Do you have feelings for me, Linc?
Feel anything at all
?

“You know what? Cra-zy! That’s what I am.” I yelled, shaking my head. “I should leave you, this place. Life out there…” I pointed toward the window. “Smacked me down lots, but at least I didn’t have to
see
it,
smell
it,
taste
it every-freaking-day. I could turn a blind eye or bury my head under the covers, but not
here
.” My arm flung around the room like some lunatic racing to catch a fleeing cab.

The glass perched at his lips slipped from his hand during my tirade. Brownish liquid splashed everywhere, the tumbler bounced off the bar and onto the wood floor, sounding like golf ball-sized hail raining down.

He stalked across the room, halting a mere inch from me.

My breath seized at the heated look on his face.

He swept his thumb in a soft brush across my cheek, drifting it along my neck and weaving his hand beneath my hair, holding the back of my head tight. At my hip, his other hand yanked me forward. Lips and teeth clashed together as he dove his tongue in, tossing mine around in a passionate,
you’re not going anywhere
kiss. His peppermint taste and spicy cologne sucked me in. My hold loosened on his broad shoulders and began a descent. I took my time and let my hands explore each ridge on his chest and abs, drawing it out and ending up
way
lower. I grabbed his hard and thick shaft and squeezed.

He tore his mouth away from mine, swept me into his arms, and carried me to his bedroom.

Sprawled in the center of the comforter, I memorized every move he made. He undressed in slow motion, removing his shoes, socks, dress shirt, and suit pants. I hoped with all my might this would be our moment.
Please make love to me, Linc.

At the foot of the bed, his stark nakedness caused my breath to stop. I wanted each gorgeous part of him captured in my mind and heart, so no details could ever be forgotten. It had been too long since I last saw him nude. Since the second night, when he asked me to undress him.

One after another, he edged his hands and knees along my body, like a panther marking his path and pursuing his next great hunt. His blazing blue, green, and black eyes studied my deer-in-the-headlights face, heaving chest, clenched hands, and trembling legs.

He lunged—to my neck—sucking, biting, dragging my flesh and feeding his ravenousness.

Yes, please, please take me.

Men shouldn’t have such long hair. It was too tempting. Regardless, I threaded my fingers through the silkiness. A thousand strands fell along my shoulders, gliding over my skin like a masseuse’s fingertips, stroking and caressing. I grabbed his neck and hauled his mouth to mine, devouring the million erotic flavors he embodied.

In seconds, he removed my miniscule dress, as well as the scraps beneath it, and aligned his hard and soft contrasting body on top of mine. Our moans echoed each other, radiating and trembling along my chest and stomach, and racing down to my scrunching toes. Between my legs, his warm and thick erection excited me so much that my inner sexpot took the lead. I shifted my body downward, positioning my opening above the tip of his shaft, inching my legs wider and wider and wider until—

He jerked his mouth away, bringing my covert maneuvers to an end.

“Make love to me.” Hopefully my sincere plea didn’t come across as desperate. Every day it got harder to not have him and to ignore him. My sexy dreams left me frustrated beyond belief.

His expression turned angelic. He pressed his lips to my temple and in a soft rasp said, “Someday, a special day, you’ll have what you want. Your sweetness joining—” He took a long ragged breath and professed, “You’re pure beauty, Serena. Making love will be something you will never, ever forget. It will steal your breath, your heart, and your soul.”

There were horrible events that marked a person’s life, never to be forgotten. On some obscure day, the memory would return, a reminder of that pivotal point in time—mind’s cruel joke. Another sensory organism, the heart, joined in the misery. Together they wittily mocked, sending even the strongest individual into a never-ending spiral of doom and gloom. This was one of those instances and would haunt me forever.

What do you do when a man, who captures the essence of your being, says he doesn’t want you in that way?

I pushed my face into the crook of his neck and inhaled long and deep. God, this man would be the death of me. My labored breathing wasn’t the result of my nose being smashed against him, it came from humiliating disappointment. Either my virgin status or two-rating on the sexuality scale turned him off. On a daily basis, magnificence surrounded him, and foolishly I let myself forget that. The odd-ball in the mix and an Amazonian toad, my tall athletic frame with oceanic hips just got dumped in the reject pile. There wasn’t any way I could compare to the exquisiteness that inhabited this place. At any time he could hand pick from the cream of the crop.

Beauty, indeed, was in the eye of the beholder.

So where did that leave me?

Yep, right here—between a rock and a hard place—Linc and nowhere to hide.

What I wouldn’t give for a disappearing cloak or a time machine, giving me a chance to vanish. Since that wouldn’t happen, I made every attempt to perform a sneaky removal from underneath him. I pushed and attempted to dash away, but he grabbed my arm, springing me back to the bed. Seated at the edge, I formulated another escape plan.

“Serena,” he called, the deep, mellow tone sending shivers along my spine like a sad song.

I could not look at him.

The mirror told me what I would see—sympathy for a girl—now a woman who looked—
fill in the blank
. On any given day it varied, some good, some bad. I didn’t hate myself. My evaluation came from a realistic view. I would always be an average-looking woman. Out in the real world, no problem.

This time, this place, this man = Not. Good. Enough.

He wrapped his arms across my bare stomach, holding me still. His hot breath and fiery naked chest engulfed my back, blistering the ice embodying me.
Ugh.
I closed my eyes, which forced other senses to take over. Accustomed to him, I recognized his Diesel cologne, a scent I liked a lot except right now. It caused my obsessive, washed-up emotions and head to spin.
Damn him.

“Let me get dressed, Linc,
please
.”

He must have sensed my desperation or the pain in my voice, because he let go in an instant. I grabbed a shirt from the chair, covering what I could, and ducked into the bathroom.

I glanced in the mirror and told myself—
I will not cry, I will not cry
.

Famous last words.

Feet propped on a lounge chair, I concentrated on the rolling waves and boats far off in the distance. Were they coasting aimlessly or did they have some goal?

My purpose had been clear: pay off the debt. The progress had been consistent. Flourishing accounting business—
check
. Nanny job—
check
. Larger-than-ever paychecks and increasing tips
—check
.

The aimless part of my life—Linc.

His naked body and physical perfection could grace any artists’ canvas. Painting nude forms made complete sense; some deserved the reverence. Even with his clothes on, the erotic images I had of him became a natural occurrence. Like an icon or idol, he got a lot of appreciation and every female lusted after him. I couldn’t blame them. He exemplified a living, breathing sexual fantasy that few, if any, could ignore.

But—there were flaws too. Invisible to the naked eye and ones he hid well. If a person took the time to watch him
closely
, they’d see the hairline cracks behind his mask.

Wounds scattered—internal.

As much time as I spent examining his every move, I witnessed the haunted look appear, and just as quick, he’d recover, closing me out. Trying to decipher a complex man like Linc required finding a way “in,” past his reserve and cautious lifestyle. The packed lounge evidence of his success and determination, and proof the business was his main priority.

Every day B.B. reminded me he belonged to her.

But I wanted him—beyond the physical.

Circumstances brought us together, and a pesky internal voice told me he’d be worth the risk. Even if my ego took a constant battering. Last night had been a prime example. After my crying jag, I came out of the bathroom exhausted to find Linc tucked into bed, concern etched into lines along his forehead. Nerves shot to hell from his blatant rejection, I climbed under the covers and scrunched myself onto the farthest tippy-edge of the mattress.

Instead of going to sleep, he embarked on an extensive twenty-questions session, inquiring about my life: growing up, Gram, work, anything and everything. From the day I moved in, he’d asked just one intrusive question—why I quit school. After that, he didn’t pry any further. Perhaps, because he had a lot to protect too and didn’t want to answer in return. A private person myself, I understood that well. Plus the ghosts in my own closet didn’t need to be unearthed.

The pain I felt from our earlier interaction subsided the more interested he became in learning about me. As I responded, he’d twirl his fingers in my hair, gazing at the strands as they fell on my shoulders. When he tired of that motion, he entwined our fingers together, set them between our thrumming hearts and held them there as I talked. Before I realized it, the sun rose, and sleep came at dawn instead.

“Serena, where are you?” The urgent baritone yanked me into the present.

I turned around in my chair as Linc marched through the sliding glass doors, joining me outside.

“You ready to go?” he prompted with an attitude that said I should’ve prepared for departure and been out the door a long time ago.

“Uh, go where?”

“It’s a surprise.” His bright smile promised a good time. I, however, remained stuck in place, flabbergasted, since he’d never taken me anywhere before.

“What kind?”

He exhaled a long tiresome breath as if I were four years old asking, “Are we there yet?” Seated next to me on the lounge chair, he propped his arms across his grey T-shirt like I should’ve followed his command already.

My eyes had a mind of their own, embarking on a solo trip, bypassing his stern face and zeroing in on his bulging muscles, smack dab in the front of my nose.

He placed a thumb under my chin, directing my wayward gaze up to his twinkling blue eyes. The crook of his mouth tilting up a tad.

Dang, he caught me. I smacked his hand away. “Where we goin’?” My mood and tone sent a
don’t mess with me
warning. If he thought he could yank me around, when I got done with him, he’d beg for mercy.

No sooner had the question left my mouth, Linc tossed me over his shoulder. Suspended upside down, I face-planted right on his ass. “What the heck are you doin’?” My hands clutched the humungous pockets on his cargo shorts, and I steadied myself. All the blood flowed to my head and stung like an ice cream brain freeze.

His hyena laughter continued as he exited my apartment, carried me into the elevator, and through the garage. All the while I had the benefit of admiring his—assets.

Aw, too bad, so sad for me. I might’ve even rubbed the plump, firm cheeks a teensy bit with my thumbs and fingers. Hehe.

Set on my unsteady feet in front of a super-bad-ass, black muscle car with white racing stripes down the center, a pounding head rush came on, making me woozy. I gripped his upper arms, hoping I wouldn’t fall over. He bent at the knees and looked me square in the eyes. “I promise, it’ll be worth the wait. I’m about to make one of your dreams come true.”

Oh yeah? He could’ve done that last night, but
no
.

My inner-sass couldn’t be contained. I launched a quick-fire retort that came with an over-exaggerated head shake. “I don’t know, you’ve been havin’…issues satisfying me.” His narrowed expression said he got the underlying meaning.

He yanked me against his well-sculpted form, nipping my earlobe and following it with a gruff counter. “Is that a challenge, Serena? Because you already know I’m a very determined man. I promise you, my performance isn’t an
issue
, but exactly what you need.”