Insatiable (24 page)

Sweat rode her cheekbones and pearled on the swells of her breasts. “The elevator‟s soundproof. No one will hear you but me.”

Trust was a two-way street, he knew. And how could he demand hers when he refused to give his own?

She took hold of him in both hands and slid her tongue in maddening swirls over his shaft. The animalistic grunts he made weren‟t familiar to him, bursting from his throat with machine-gun succession as she yanked the belt free and sent it clattering across the reflective floor of the elevator. And all the while, her musky scent wrapped around him, hammering at his senses until his hunger for her exceeded all bounds.

His control snapped. He begged. Christ, he all but yelled. But she took and took more, extending her game until he ripped free of his cotton shackles, not caring if he tore the fabric. Hell, he‟d walk out of here naked if he got to have her first.

And he would have her. Like no one ever had before.

He dragged her up, pushing her back against the glass wall as his gaze swept past her shoulder for one instant to the mind-boggling drop below. The height was staggering, but the sweetness of her mouth as he surged his tongue as deep as the fingers he plunged inside her pussy was more so. Her juices soaked his hand, sliding down his wrist as he corkscrewed his fingers in and out.
More, more
. Now he was the one thinking it, chanting it against her mouth.

Relishing her cries, he streaked his mouth down her body to bury his face between her thighs, half-mad to get her taste in his throat. She ground against him, jerking in the arms he clamped around her hips as she rode the wave of pleasure.

Knowing what would send over her again, he brutally rubbed her clit with his tongue, letting out a growl as her scream tattered every nerve ending not already pulsing in his body.

He rose, not giving her enough time to even draw breath as grasped her thigh, lifting it high as he teased her dripping entrance with his cock. She was the one who begged this time, uttering every word he‟d ever imagined in his fantasies. He Insatiable

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dragged her leg around his waist and slid into her, so deep her heel skewered his back. But even that small pain only intensified the drugging, delicious sensation of her tight wetness sheathing his cock.

The rhythm of her hips matched his, each parry of their tongues mimicking the thrust and retreat of his body into hers. Suddenly she went very still, her hands sliding down his sweat-slickened shoulders.

Their gazes connected, and he fought to pull himself back enough to kiss her once more, tenderly. “Mine.”

Those dark eyes he‟d loved all his life blurred as she arched to take him even deeper. But her mouth remained soft under his. Yielding, pliant. The most delicious surrender he‟d ever tasted. “Mine,” she echoed, her body quaking against him.

Around him.

Trembling on the verge, he slapped his hand on the glass above her head, battering her control and shredding his own until his pummeling thrusts sent them over together.

* * *

His expression had glazed when she‟d unearthed the clingy dress she‟d tucked in her purse to wear to dinner. Even now, a few hours after the most amazing sexual encounter of both their lives—something he‟d offered without her asking, though she‟d been sorely tempted—he still watched her as if he couldn‟t get enough.

Incredible.

When he insisted she go ahead of him into their room, she assumed he was just being gentlemanly. But her heart leaped into her throat, drumming there, as her stunned gaze swept the suite. Candles dotted the dresser, the bookshelves, filling the room with the scent of vanilla and enough shifting light to make his eyes dance with the flames.

“God, Shawn…this is beautiful.”

“You gave me a mind-blowing fuck in an elevator.” His laughter rumbled against her ear as he wrapped his arms around her waist. “And I gave you candles and rose petals on the bed.”

That she could laugh as tears blinded her said so much. Said everything. She took a step toward the bed and its cover of red, white, and pink rose petals. With the first skim of her fingertips over their velvety softness, she whirled back into his arms and pressed her face against his chest.

“Hey, hey.” He dashed her tears with his thumbs as he had so many times before. “I thought you liked roses. You usually go for all that feminine crap.”

“I do.” Her laughter ended in another outburst of tears. “You know me. My heart, my body. And you accept me as I am. That‟s why I could give you a mind-126

Cari Quinn

blowing fuck in an elevator, because it so wasn‟t about that. You got that, didn‟t you?”

Seeing his eyes soften tore at her. “Yeah.”

“I never understood what the big fuss was about making love. When I was with Ryan, I think I was too young to really know, but now that I do, everything‟s changed. I‟m not the same person I was when I got off that plane, but you still know me.” Afraid she wasn‟t making any sense with her blubbering, she shook her head.

“I put you through the wringer all these years.”

“None of that matters anymore.” He laid his lips against her forehead, and her fingers dug into his shirt just above his heart. That strong, even beat steadied her in ways she could never explain. “I love you. I always have. I always will.”

Rachel lifted her head, meeting his gaze head-on. She‟d hidden long enough. “I didn‟t sleep with Ryan. Before you get pissed I didn‟t come clean earlier, you might as well get pissed about this too. He never dumped me.” When his Adam‟s apple bobbed, she forced out the rest. “He asked me to go to New York with him. And I said no.”

Questions sprang up in his eyes, followed by the dawning understanding that erased them.

“I told you I‟d never leave you,” she whispered.

He crushed her close. “Why didn‟t you tell me? If I‟d known—”

“I couldn‟t tell you what I couldn‟t face myself. It‟s not supposed to work out this way.” She swiped at the tears rolling down her face, ten years‟ worth. “The girl‟s supposed to end up with the bad boy with the heart of gold. Kate Winslet doesn‟t love Billy Zane; she loves Leonardo.”

It was his turn to laugh. “You‟re telling me you couldn‟t admit you‟re in love with me because of
Titanic
?”

“You never liked that movie.”

“No kidding?” At her snort, he brushed a damp curl off her cheek. “Honey, touchy-feely flicks are the bane of most men‟s existence. With a couple exceptions.”

“Such as?”

“Such as ones that feature girl-on-girl mud wrestling.” His lascivious eyebrow-wiggle dried up the last of her tears as she started to laugh. “Now those I could get behind.”

“God. You‟re such a pig.”

“I won‟t oink again, because that would just be repetitive.” He grinned and nudged down the spaghetti straps of her dress. “If the crying portion of our program is through, can we get down to you showing me exactly how much you love me?” She shivered as he lapped at her ear. “All night long?”

“You‟re forgetting one vital thing, Griffin.”

“Yeah?”

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“Yeah.” Her hands came up to cover his on her shoulders. “I still haven‟t said I love you.”

The punch of shock that stole his breath gave her enormous satisfaction. “But you do. I know you do.”

Rachel picked up a handful of rose petals and let them flutter back to the bed.

“I was afraid to tell you how I felt. To believe it could be enough. But—”

At the knock on the door, her smile faded. As Shawn turned to answer it, she knew, just
knew
, she‟d waited too long to say the words now wedged like blazing coals in her throat.

The voices were too low for her to make out what was being said, but she didn‟t miss Shawn‟s pained exhalation a moment before he stepped into the hall and shut the door.

She closed her eyes, remembering the night he‟d knocked the phone off the hook. He hadn‟t connected it since. Neither of them had turned on their cell phones since by mutual agreement. Once he‟d gotten her to actually acknowledge how much talking to their families rattled her, she‟d been as eager for the radio silence as Shawn. More so, because his reasons for wanting it were all about her.

Everything was, always. He did whatever he could to make her happy. To ease her fears. And in this case, if her worst suspicions were correct, he‟d cut off contact with his family when they needed him most.

For
her.

When he returned, she was perched on the end of the bed, her fingers digging into her shoulders to keep herself still. Though she didn‟t glance at his face, his choppy breathing scraped icicles up her spine.

He walked to the desk, where the laptop he hadn‟t turned on for days sat undisturbed among the candles. With a roar that had her releasing a cry, he swept the computer aside, driving it onto the floor with a sickening crunch.

Rachel jumped to her feet and knelt beside him as he crouched, not to pick up the pieces, but to slam the shards into dust with his fists. A quick check of the candles showed that none of them had tipped, but if he kept up his assault on the computer, that wouldn‟t be true for long.

Her arms banded around him with every ounce of her strength, and she held on even when his body braced as if he was restraining himself from shaking her free. She pressed her wet eyes against his back, her heart breaking for him. “Tell me.”

He didn‟t seem to hear her. “It‟s my fault. My fault.”

“No. It‟s not, sweetheart, I promise.” Finding reserves she hadn‟t known she had, she bore down and tightened her grip. She sensed she needed to, for both of them. “Tell me, Shawn.”

Warm liquid splashed their palms as he cupped them over his face. “My father,” he whispered.

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She sank onto the luxurious carpet, her butt hitting the floor hard enough to jar her bones had she still been aware of her body. But she could only think of the man she‟d hung up on days earlier because he‟d committed the cardinal sin of wanting her to marry his son.

Because her chest suddenly felt too tight, she eased back, desperate to get some air in her lungs. How could he blame himself?
She’d
done this. If she hadn‟t been so stupid and selfish, she wouldn‟t have kept a man from his father.

Maybe she hadn‟t asked Shawn to stay away from his parents, but he‟d felt as if he‟d had no choice if he wanted a chance with her. True, she‟d had her reasons but right now, those reasons didn‟t seem very important. All they seemed was petty and childish. And the decision he‟d made had cost him beyond estimation.

God, how would he ever forgive her? How would she forgive herself?

Candlelight shimmered over Shawn‟s golden hair as he turned to stare at her, his lips parting almost as if he‟d been sucker-punched. An answering sob rose in her throat as the candlelight glimmered on the damp streaks under his eyes.

Rachel opened her arms, but he stretched out to lay his head in her lap instead. With her own tears tracking silently down her cheeks, she stroked his hair and listened to the sounds of his grief, remembering the night he‟d held her as she cried herself to sleep in a hospital bed.

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Chapter Sixteen

The funeral was scheduled for several days later. Rachel went home with Shawn without even stopping by her apartment to pick up fresh clothes, though she wondered why she‟d bothered since he hardly seemed to notice her presence.

Since they‟d arrived in Calvin Bay, he‟d stayed on the couch, pretending to watch TV. Pretending he was listening to her when she talked, pretending he was thinking about the answers he delivered to her questions as mechanically as a drone. He dutifully played his role when company arrived—and there was a lot of company, because in a small town like theirs, many people knew Dillon and wanted to pay their respects—but nothing touched his eyes. Not grief, not rage.

Nothing.

In desperation, she turned to him in bed the night before the funeral, frantic to rouse some emotion within him. Some sign of the man she loved. But even when he slipped inside her, she might as well have been back in the courtyard during the Zenith gala.

Only now the statue was a ghost of the man Shawn had been.

“I don‟t know what to do,” Rachel said to Morgan as she chopped carrots in Shawn‟s kitchen. She‟d already prepared two appetizer platters for the small gathering they‟d agreed to have after Elaina‟s larger one at the mansion, and had just started a third. “He won‟t talk to me. Or anyone else.”

“Rachel, he needs to grieve. You can‟t force him out of that on your timetable.”

Her knife slipped out of her fingers. “
My
timetable?”

Morgan gave a dainty shrug that sent the diamond spheres at her ears twirling. She was dressed in sedate mourning black, her sunny hair pulled back in a chignon. But she‟d still heaped on the glitters. “It‟s only natural you‟d want to enjoy the glow period of a new relationship.”

“
New relationship
? Are you frigging kidding me? The only thing new is throwing sex into the mix.” Rachel tossed her fraying ponytail over one shoulder, her posture stiffening as she realized they were no longer alone.

Shawn was standing in the doorway, wearing his sweats and the same ripped T-shirt he‟d slept in the night before. His hair wasn‟t combed, and his jaw was dark with stubble. Worst of all, the telemarketer she‟d tangled with on the phone that morning had shown more animation than she glimpsed in his eyes.