Indulgence (70 page)

I watch as the tattoo artist, Kyle, cleans my skin. He
discusses everything he will be doing to keep me relaxed but it only makes it
worse. Just as he lifts the outline I jump. “Whoa there, just going to put the
outline on, Kyle says carefully.

“I… I need to see it,” I mutter as I reach my hand out.

“Here,” Gray says calmly as he hands the sketch.

As my eyes roam over it I can’t keep from smiling. It’s a
daisy. It stands tall except the end of the stem that will curl along my panty
line. “It’s beautiful,” I whisper as a tear slips down my cheek.

“No,” Gray whispers. “You are.” His thumb swipes away the
tear as I nod.

Lying back on the table, I gesture to Kyle that I am ready.
Gently, he places the outline as Gray rubs circles on my wrists with his
thumbs. Leaning down, he kisses my lips gently. “Ready?” Gray asks; then I hear
Kyle switch on his gun. All I can do is nod as my body tenses.

The first few sticks are really the worst; though nothing is
worse than the sound of the gun. That is the worst part, I think. Like the
drill at the dentist. Eventually, I am numb for the most part. My eyes don’t
leave Gray’s face. He drifts from watching Kyle to me. Every time he looks at
me, he just smiles.

“Why do you call me Wildflower?” I blurt without thinking.

Gray shrugs. “Daisies are wildflowers. They can thrive even
in the worst circumstances because they are stronger than the others. Probably
even come out more beautiful for it. Roses are shady bitches. They look all
pretty, sure, but have those thorns waiting to stick ya when you aren’t
looking.”

Closing my eyes, I let Gray’s words wash over me. I swear
everything he says is a damn song lyric in the making. I am scared of what I
feel for Gray already. It is nothing like what I thought I felt and still
somewhat feel for Landon. It is so different. Part of me still loves Landon,
even though I know he isn’t mine anymore. He probably never even was. He said
that he loved me but I know that he is conflicted, so am I.

Gray thinks that I am so strong. Am I? Did I make the choice
that I thought was best by giving Landon back his ring? Am I strong by wanting
a plan that I made ten years ago; or is it my weaknesses clinging to the safety
of familiarity?

Things that Cam said argue inside my head with Gray’s words.
Cam is right, there is no way that a member of Shaft would want to settle down
right now. Though Gray says he is nothing like Hunter. I do know that to be
true mostly anyway. I’ve seen Gray talk with the groupies but never doing
anything like Cunter. Gray says that he wants me; but part of me is afraid that
Gray is more like Hunter. Although, I think Grayson is more like Aiden than he
wants to admit. Aiden and Grayson are more balanced, more grounded than Hunter.
At least that’s my opinion but even Aiden wouldn’t want to be tied to a
‘girlfriend’. He doesn’t put a label on what he has with Cam. Would Gray really
want to settle down with the band getting bigger every day? I mean, Cam is
afraid Aiden doesn’t want to settle; although, I have doubts there too. Why
would three guys about to become larger than life want to settle down during
the biggest years of their lives? Since Landon and I are over, maybe I should
see where this goes? Or should I run while I have the chance?

“Hey, all done. Where’d you go?” Gray whispers into my ear.

“Just thinking. Can I see?” I ask as he helps me off the
table to the mirror.

The stem starts along my pelvic bone, flirting with the edge
of my panties moving up to end with the bloom curving around my navel. “The
petals are gray?” I ask confused turning to Gray.

Grayson smiles, “No, they’re steel. Strong. Able to
withstand anything thrown at them.” Grabbing my hand, he pulls it to his lips,
kissing my palm. “Unable to be trampled or plucked, baby. Forever flawless, my
Wildflower.” I stand, shocked into silence while Kyle applies the ointment then
bandages me up. I slip my jeans back on but don’t button them so nothing rubs
my sore flesh.

“All paid and ready to go,” Gray announces as he drapes his
hoodie over my shoulders.

“You paid?” I ask in disbelief, “It’s my tattoo.”

“It was my idea,” he says brushing his lips over mine
softly.

“Ready to head back to the bus?”

I shake my head. “Mexico is nice this time of year.”

“It is,” he agrees. Wrapping his arms around me he kisses my
frowning lips. “Though we can’t avoid it forever. Hey, you’ve got me, Cam,
Aiden… Hell even Henry and Cunter would kill Landon if they knew.”

“That’s why they don’t,” I remind him. “I don’t want it to
be all about me if things go to shit. It would cause too many problems. I don’t
want the tour ruined, it’s too important. Let’s go before they leave us.” I
kiss his lips reassuringly. After we thank Kyle again, we go in search of a cab
to take us back to the bus.

“So you goin’ to show it off?” Gray asks, stopping outside
the cab door to kiss me.

“You know it. What are we waiting for?” I tease as he jerks
open the door.

It is nearly four am by the time we make it back to the bus.
Gray and I are completely wiped. My side is stinging, which is a lot better
than the pain I expected to feel. All I want is my bed, with Gray wrapped
around me for twelve hours or more. The sight I walk in on has me nearly
heaving up the dinner I fought to keep down during a two hour tattoo session.
There is Landon, on his knees stroking himself all while Tad is fucking his
mouth. Tad’s eyes snap to mine, as a smile spreads across his face. “You wanna
ask her to join us now, Landon? Go on then, pet. Just ask her,” Tad hisses,
thrusting his hips, nearly choking Landon in the process.

Opening my mouth, I try to say something, anything. There is
nothing but shock. Landon doesn’t move. It’s like he doesn’t care.

Spooners and Forkers

“What the ever lovin’ fuck is this?” Cam’s screams echo
through the bus from behind me.

Slamming into Tad, she knocks him into the wall. “You son of
a bitch! You don’t care who you hurt, do you?” Cam shouts, as her fist connects
with his nose. Tad screams as blood pours from his nose. Grabbing Cam by her
shoulders, Landon shoves her to the couch.

“Get the fuck off of him,” Landon’s voice is volatile, in a
way I’ve never heard before. Landon has never been one to jump into a fight, at
least not for me. I stand there watching while Landon defends Tad in ways he
would never have done for me. The realization shocks my system, making me see
yet another thing I thought I had that I truly didn’t. I didn’t have him at my
side like Tad obviously does. Just another thing that should break my heart; I
wait for it to shatter but no cracks. Nothing but anger at the shit going on
behind my back just hours after Landon was crying, begging for me to take him
back.

Aiden roars, grabbing Landon by his throat. “You never touch
my woman, motherfucker!” Landon is gasping for breath as he claws at Aiden’s
hands. Without a second thought, Aiden shoves him out the door of the bus.
Landon stumbles backwards down the steps, crumbling to the pavement.

“You stupid bitch!” Tad growls, “You broke my goddamn nose.
I should call the cops.”

I grab a wad of napkins from Aiden’s fast food bag, shoving
them into his hand. “Boo-fuckin’-hoo! What exactly happened?” I ask tapping my
temple with my finger. “Did anyone witness this attack?” Aiden and Gray
chuckle, shaking their heads.

“I ran into the side of Tad’s face. It really was the
damnedest thing. Landon can take him to the E.R. Maybe they will give a shit
about how I may have broken his nose,” Cam whines. “Bastard’s lucky his dick is
still attached.”

Laughter bubbles out of my chest, causing me to double over.
The complete clusterfuck that has been the last week of my life, none of which
is really funny at all, but has me laughing. I slide to the wall as the tears
stream down my face, blurring my vision. “This is too much,” I hiss out,
clutching my side. The adrenaline is wearing off. Now, I am feeling the burn in
my side again. Tad stuffs himself back in his pants then stomps off of the bus.

“Come on, Landon,” Tad shouts. Like the little puppet Landon
is, he stands and follows behind him to the SUV Henry is helping Hunter out of.
They exchange some words then I watch as they drive off without another word.
That’s right, not a damn word. The man I’ve spent the last year with, the man I
was planning the rest of my life around, left without saying one word to me. No
explanations, no excuses, not even a fucking ‘see ya later’. He just left me
after walking in on that goddamn nightmare.

“Babe, you have blood all over you,” Aiden says, looking Cam
over. Turning to face Gray he declares, “That bastard is gone. Fuckin’ gone,
Gray! I don’t give two shits if he’s your brother or the goddamn head of Sony
Music. G-O-N-E!” he growls.

Gray nods as he pulls at my shirt to check my bandage. “It’s
fine. No one touched me,” I say shooing his hands.

Cam’s squeals interrupt my explanation as she shoves Gray
out of the way. “You sneaky whore! You didn’t tell me anything about getting a
tattoo.” She yanks my hand pulling me toward her to get a closer look. “Lemme
see! Lemme see!” she delights, pulling at the bandage. It makes me smile that
Cam seems to bounce back so quickly. She just broke Tad’s nose, then Landon
pounces on her, but here she is excited over my ink.

“Right? Because there was a tattoo viewing portion of the
orgy, turned MMA match?” I snap teasingly. Of course Cam just glares at me,
arching her brow. “Okay. Okay. Let me do it!” I say, shoving her hands away to
get the bandage off then pull her down the aisle toward the bunks.

“It rocks! Holy shit!” she says, bouncing on her heels. “In
Vegas we’re shopping! You can’t cover that up ever!”

“OH Henry, why?” We both turn to see Henry helping Hunter up
the steps.

Hunter looks wrecked. His shirt is ripped, his face is pale
and he’s covered in puke. “Because you’re a stupid cocky bastard.”

“That hurts, Big Man. Like right here,” Hunter says, pushing
his hand against his chest. “It hurts right here.” Walking carefully around us,
Henry helps Hunter into the bathroom, cutting the cold water on full blast then
shoves Hunter into the shower stall still fully clothed. “Fuck! That’s cold!”
he screams. Hunter’s brown eyes roam over to mine as his smile spreads. “Wanna
help me scrub up?” Hunter slurs, eyeing Cam and I leaning against the bedroom
door.

Henry rolls his eyes then slams the door making us laugh
“Fine, you bitches are spooners anyway. I need a forker!” Hunter shouts through
the door.

“Just wash your forkin’ ass!” Henry shouts, slapping the
door. “Don’t mind him, ladies. A chick tonight didn’t know who he was. Deflated
Cunter’s poor ego. He got trashed; now he’s covered in his own self-pity.”

“Is that what self-pity smells like?” Cam shrieks, holding
her nose. “Fuck, someone needs to put that man out of his misery!”

“I’m in misery without someone to fork, baby!” Hunter sings
from the shower. “I wanna, wanna fork you long time.”

“Oh my god! Aiden, I need to go to bed,” Cam groans, shaking
her head.

“You got this?” Aiden asks, looking at Henry as Hunter
starts another chorus of ‘fork you, baby’.

“I’ve got him, man. No one else can handle him when he gets
like this,” I hear Henry reply as I head into the bedroom with Gray hot on my
heels.

Closing the door behind him Gray’s eyes meet mine. Pulling
me against him, his thumb traces my bottom lip slowly undoing me. “Interesting
night… Cam beat the hell outta Tad. Landon freaked out on her. Not to mention
Aiden nearly rippin’ his head off for touchin’ Camaron,” he says, shakin’ his
head. “Landon isn’t worried about who he hurts. I’m firing them once they come
back. Aiden agrees, and, well, Hunter is too fucked in his own head tonight but
he will be on board too. They’re gone, but you…” he says brushing his lips over
mine.

“I can’t just…” I start but Gray silences me with a kiss.
His tongue parts my lips, diving into my mouth. Melting against him has become
instinct and he knows it too. Gray grins against my lips as he pulls us to the
bed, settling me on top of him. Our lips fused together, my hands tugging his
hair. Loving every minute of his hands running along my body, I lose myself in
him, in us. I don’t want to think about the fact that everything is falling
apart around us. I don’t want to think that this is temporary, even though my
subconscious knows it is.

“We have something here, Wildflower. You can’t deny it. Your
name is signed on the contract as an assistant to the band. Extra pair of
hands, remember? I want you here. Stay. Tell me you won’t leave,” he pleads, as
I pull my shirt over my head. Rolling me beneath him, Gray trails kisses along
my chest. His lips moving along the edge of my tattoo so carefully, so gently
that it almost unhinges me.

“I don’t wanna think about it Gray, not now.” Leaning back,
I pop the clasp on my bra, tossing it to the floor. Gray runs his tongue around
my nipple, sucking it into his mouth. Straddling his thighs, I roll my hips
against him making his eyes close. He releases my nipple with a pop. Those
amazing eyes of his snapping up to mine, hooded and dark, waiting to claim me
again.

“You. Naked. Now,” he groans.

The door flies open making me jump. Hunter walks in as Gray
wraps his arms around me. My chest smashed against his, keeping me covered.
“What the fuck are you doing in my room, Cunter?” Ignoring Gray, Hunter flops
on the bed beside us, completely naked, still dripping wet from his shower.

“I wrote a song,” he slurs, wrapping an arm around Gray’s
neck. My eyes drift down Hunter’s body. His colorful bands aren’t the only
tattoos he has. He has music notes along his chest and lyrics that I can’t read
from this angle. “Do you wanna hear it?”