In Search of Grace (23 page)

             
When she
had not
called,
his worry escalated.
He
certainly
was not prepared for her
nonchalant
and flippant
response
over the phone. 
He was shocked
tonight
when he heard her at the door.
  He figured she would have been gone for several more days. 

             
It was hard to stay
upset
now that she was here.  She looked scrumptious in her
little
shirt and sweatpants
.  His hands itched to reach out and touch her.  Yet he waited.

             
Alex’s hand we
nt
up to his c
hest
,
and
laying her hand flat on him
,
immediately felt the heat through her palm. 

             
“Don’t be angry with
me,
” she whispered.  He felt himself getting aroused at the simple touch of her hand on his
bare
skin.
All he wanted to do was reach out, grab her
,
and kiss her hard, but he was more interested in seeing where she was going to take this
.
  Was she going to run
as
she always did when she faced a
conflict?

             
He grabbed her hand and pushed it
off
him.
“
We
need
to
talk about this. 
I want to get to know you better
,
Alex.
”

             
“Really, it wasn’t that big of a deal
,
Seth
. I went away for work.”

             
“It is not just about you not telling me
,
Alex
,
or
about you going away…it is the big picture
. Y
ou are closed up and defensive all of the time.  I care and want to know what is going on in your life.
 
If you can’t trust me with the little
things
, how are you going to trust me with the big
things?
”

             
“I
do
trust you.”  Alex’s heart started to pound in her chest as she thought about her conversation with Charles and her scar.  Did she trust him?  She hated these types of conversations.
She just wanted him to kiss her again.

             
“I called you when I needed you
...”

             
Pushing away from the counter
,
he stood inches from her
, towering above her
.

             
“You don’t get it
,
do you?  I want you to call me even when you don’t ‘need’ me or
when you
are afraid.  Call me because you are thinking about me
,
because
you want to see me.”

             
“I am trying
,
Seth, I really am.  You
do not
understand.  I have a lot of baggage.”

             
He cupped her face with hi
s hands.  “We all have baggage.  The difference between me and you is that you haven’t even started to
unpack.”

 
             
Alex put her hand on his chest again.  “I will try
,
Seth.”
He said nothing
but watched
as s
lowly she slid her hand down his chest, feeling the tiny, dark hairs
narrow
as
she followed the line to
the
open button
of his jeans.
 
Raising her head to look into his eyes
again,
she saw
them
darken
.
Losing confidence, she slid both arms around his waist, pulling him close
,
lean
ing
her head on his chest
,
i
nhaling deeply while closing her eyes.  Seth wrapped his arms around her and hugged her back, sighing
.
  She was going to be the death of him.  He felt her insecurities
,
and his heart went out to her.  Damn he
had
missed her. 
Pulling
away slightly
,
his head dropped as he
crushed her lips to his.  She met his kiss with the same intensity.  His hands cupp
ing
her breasts
, he shuddered
when she turned
her hand
to
touch
him
through his jeans
.
It was a
bold and
unexpected move on her part
,
and he felt himself
starting to
throb
in response to
the
intimate touch
.
  He
pulled back, watching
her face change to a look of surprise at his
quick response
,
enjoying the flush of color cross her
cheeks
.  “Why are you surprised at how you make me feel?” 

             
Shaking her head, she rubbed against
him
.  He took a deep breath.  S
he
was sucking all of the
air
out of him, just with her touch.
S
lowly
she
started to unzip
his jeans
. 
H
e grabbed her wrist to stop her, but she yanked it way.  Standing on
tiptoe
, she
leaned against him, her stomach now pressing against him
,
and fire shot though him as he heard her whisper.

             
“Fair is f
air
,
Seth
.  T
it for tat and all of that
.
”
Then
she kissed the side of his neck. 
H
e watched in fascination as she continued to kiss down his chestwhile
unzipping
his jeans.  When her mouth reached his
stomach
, she dropped to her knees.
Realizing
what she was
about
to do and before he could stop her
,
he felt her sliding
him
into her
warm
mouth.  Moaning
aloud
,
he grabbed her head to pull away from her
but instea
d sunk his fingers
deep
in her hair
as her tongue encircled the tip of him.  Sucking and pulling on him
,
he closed his eyes as he felt a rush of blood and knew that he was going to lose it in a minute if she didn’t stop.

             
“
Alex
, stop
!
” 
Seth
could not
believe
that was his voice he heard
cracking.
  Now it was his turn to beg.

             
She paid no attention to him
as she moved
against him
with more confidence
.

             
Letting out a growl
,
he jerked away
from her and lifted her up off
the floor
to stand on her feet.
Crushing his lips against
hers
again
,
he kissed her
hard
w
hile
pulling her body tight
so that she could
feel every inch of his body. 
Alex was
now the one
on fire. 
Seth pushed her away staring deep into her eyes. 
S
canning her face for an
answer
he
seemed to
need
,
her
lip
s swollen from the
ir
kiss.  There was no more anger
from him
,
o
nly need. 
Pushing away from the counter,
n
either said a word when he
took
her hand and led her to
his
bedroom.

             
Standing facing his bed, she quickly looked around his room with surprise and pleasure.  The
chocolate
brown
walls were
muted and soothing.
Black and white pictures of bonsai and other trees formed a grouping adding to the serene feeling.

             
Her eyes closed when she felt him
stand
behind her
, and f
elt his hardness pressing against her back
side
. 
His hands gripped her hips as he
brought his mouth to her neck.  Her head
leaned
to one s
ide
, opening
her
self further
to him.
She felt his hands sliding up to grasp her breasts
under her shirt
.

             
“I am not going to stop
tonight
,
Alex
,
” his words sound
ed
harsh and threatening
against
her skin
,
even as her heart raced
uncontrollably
.
S
he felt no fear
yet
, only
eager
anticipation.  Reaching behind her
back,
she undid her bra,
and
without taking off her shirt, slid it off.  Frowning
,
he started to pull her shirt up over her head.  Turning quickly to face him, she pulled it back down.  “I want to leave it on.” 

             
“Alex! You have nothing to hide from me.” 

             
She said nothing
, instead
slid his hands up under her shirt while pushing
the fabric up
,
giving him
full
access, but
still refusing to take it off.  He would let this be for now, he thought
,
while taking in
a sharp breath
at feeling the fullness
when she press
ed
her
self
against
him.

             
“I don’t want you to
stop tonight
,
Seth
.
”

             
She slowly sat
and
then
lay
down on the bed
, trying to pull him down with her. 
Seth would not let her but
instead
placed h
is
hands on either side of her, grasping her hips
while
lifting
them up to
pull her
sweat
pants down
over her legs
before tossing
them
unceremoniously onto
the floor.  Easing slowly on top of her
,
he laid down
as she spread her legs
to fit him in.  He was
careful not to put too much of his weight on her.  He could feel her heat through
his jeans and groaned.
  Seeking her mouth with his
,
they hungrily drank from each other
,
neither able to get enough
.

             
Feeling her hands come around his waist while trying to tug down his own pants
,
he released her
and
stood
again while
in
one
motion,
pulled his jeans off.  Her eyes
wide
,
she
took in all of
him.  He was completely aroused.  She felt a moment of fear looking at him.