In Love by Design (The Adventures of Anabel Axelrod) (29 page)

“Okay, I have got to meet this man. I’ve never seen you act this way!” Pam declared and
jumped up in her seat. “What are you guys doing tomorrow night? I have this thing I can’t get out of, so let’s all go to dinner and make it fun!”

“All?” I asked warily.

“Yes, Carter won some sportsman prize for shooting the most of some poor animal,” she waved off the pesky details, “and there’s an awards banquet at the Porterhouse in Lakeville. The place will be packed with his crowd, but the food will be great and the booze will be free.”

“Oh,
I am so not down with that, Pam! That doesn’t sound fun!” I laughed in horror. “You and Carter…”

She
reached across the table, grabbing my hand and interrupted, “I know, I know, but it’s not like we hate each other. Carter doesn’t know of my plans to divorce him yet.”

“Oh, well,
count us in then. Not!” I said, rolling my eyes.

Pam laughed
while clarifying, “I meant that I gave my word I’d go and Carter’s counting on me. These things can get boring for me and I could use the moral support.” She sang in a wheedling tone, swaying my hand to and fro, “Come on, you and I can dress up and spend time together. We can flirt with all the men at the bar. We’ll have a few cocktails and I’ll meet your man.” She wiggled her nose. “I can check out his nose!”

Pam’s determination
was legendary. Add that to her flirting and people-pleasing tendencies and it explains why she’s such a hot commodity at charity events. She keeps the drinks coming and smiles naughtily the whole time she badgers men into writing bigger checks than they intended.

I
pulled my hand back, but she interrupted me again before I could say anything. “Call him! What was Beefcake’s name again--Luke? Call Luke right now and if he says yes, then you have to agree to come.” She leaned forward and added with a big, challenging grin, “Deal, Axelrod?”

Sometimes having old friends that know your Achilles heel
was a pain, but I had a hard time keeping my own grin under wraps.

There was no way I could lose this deal, so I asked nonchalantly, “That’s fine and good for you, but what do I get out of this deal if he says no? After all, I don’t want to go to some
boring sportsman’s banquet, regardless if Beefcake does.”

Pam
belted out a laugh that’s surprisingly deep for such a slight woman. “Ah, Bel, you sure know how to make a girl feel special!”

I stayed silent, smiling
, and her eyes got squinty. “What do you want?”

“Agree you’ll read the romance novel of my choice,” I answered
, promptly.

“
Strange, but deal,” She said at the same time I added, “Within one week of receiving and skimming no words.”

“Shit.
” She hesitated, and motioned to my phone. “Speaker phone?”

I nodded.

“Deal. Call him,” Pam ordered, smiling a little more nervously. She really hated to read.

I
called Luke and the phone rang once.

“Anabel
. Miss me so soon?” asked Luke in a voice that conjures up silk sheets and velvet pillows, and I felt enveloped in testosterone.

I said without preamble
to my Prevaricator, “Empress.”

The smile could be heard,
even though his voice was serious. “Khan.”

Pam’s looking confused, but I sa
id, “You’re on speaker phone. I’m supposed to ask if we’d be interested in joining my friend Pam and her husband, Carter, for a sportsman’s banquet tomorrow night at the Porterhouse restaurant in Lakeville.” I added dryly, “He’s won an award for killing small, defenseless animals, and sadly, will only be figuratively roasted.”

Pam slap
ped her hands over her mouth, shoulders shaking.

“Hi, Pam. Nice to meet you,”
Luke said, ignoring my question. “I hope you’re having a fun lunch with Anabel.”

Pam
’s eyebrows were raised and she was grinning. She’s impressed by Luke’s manners. “Hi, Luke, it’s nice to meet you, too.” She batted her eyelashes at me. “Bel and I always have fun.”

Luke
replied, “Yeah, I find Anabel to be a pretty good time, as well.”

I roll
ed my eyes.

Luke went on smoothly,
“Thank you, Pam, for the invitation. Our answer is yes, we can’t think of one thing we’d like to do more than join you and your husband tomorrow night.”

“I can!” I blurted,
jerking up straight, my mouth an O for the second time in an hour. “I can name a hundred things off the top!”

Pam
shook her fists together over her head like a prizefighter winning a champion bout, stuck out her tongue at me, and said excitedly, “Oh, you have no idea how happy you’ve made me with that answer, Luke! Should we all drive together? We can pick you up—it’s on our way.”

Without
missing a beat, Luke answered, “Pam, if it was up to just me that would be great, but you know Anabel’s rules. She’s got to have her own car on dates, even double dates, in case she gets bored and needs to bail.”

Slapping a knee
over her ridiculously tight skirt, Pam agreed with Mr. Tricky’s slick twisting of one of my basic and very sensible rules on dating, especially first dates.

She
teased, “My, I’m impressed. You really do know Anabel!”

“Inside and out,” Luke deadpanned
, and that answer set Pam off into a fit of dirty giggles.

I end
ed the call and Pam stopped laughing abruptly.

She
stared at me, shocked. “How rude! You just hung up on your new boyfriend!”

“
It was an accident.” Leaning forward on crossed arms, I ignored her disapproving sniff and got us back on track. “I get why you said your life is falling apart with Carter, but why are you scared?”

Pam’s face fell and she sigh
ed loudly, blowing strands of her bangs up in the air. “I feel stupid even saying this out loud, but I’ve fallen in love with my one night stand, rebound lover.”

T
hinking it was a good sign she’d labeled him correctly, I asked, “Are you sure it’s love and not just the jungle sex?”

“
Oh, it’s both, believe me. Bel, this man is interested in me! We’ve been meeting for months and yes, we have sex for hours, but we also talk. He wants to know everything about me and the way he listens is so intense.” Her laugh was brittle, yet entreating. “Am I being stupid?”

“
Well, do you wear your wedding ring when flying?”

Pam
glanced at her left hand where a tastefully large diamond glittered. “Yes, why?”

I shrug
ged a little helplessly. “Obviously, he’s made you happy, but he also hit on a married flight attendant. Honestly, as your friend, there is no easy answer. I really believe only you can be the judge of what goes on privately between the two of you. Has he told you how he feels?”

Frustrated, she groan
ed, “No, and that’s why I’m scared! I hear what you’re saying about him coming onto me, but it’s been so much more than one night. I don’t want to lose this man by doing something wrong.” Her slight laugh was tinged with desperation when she implored the second oldest girlfriend question of all time, “If you were me, what would you do?”

I sigh
ed because I’d much rather answer the first girlfriend question of, “Does this make my butt look too big?”, but valiantly rose to the task. I came to this lunch with my eyes open.

“
There’s no two ways about it, Pammie, love is scary, but you shouldn’t have to feel scared. I’d take it slow. I’d think about how I’d like to live my life as a single woman of the world. I’d think about how cool it’s going to be to makes my own choices and live by my own rules, unafraid about what a man thinks or wants me to do.” I encouraged, “Get your divorce final first and then see where you’re at with Tarzan. You can tell him then how you feel,” I replied encouragingly, “because what’s the big rush?”

Pam’s eyes grew wide. “I
can tell him that?” She sputtered, “Aren’t girls supposed to wait until the boy tells them how they feel first?”

At those words, I felt like I was
transported back in time and staring at the clueless tomboy Pam in the lunchroom of our high school all over again. Poor Pam has only been involved with one man since she was a girl, and that relationship was warped big time.

I smiled wickedly. “Pam, maybe girls are supposed to wait for boys to tell them their feelings first, but you’re a woman. Women don’t have to wait for men to do anything first,” I
flipped my hair back and purred, “Unless we want to, of course.”

“
She Wants To Move” by N.E.R.D.

Friday, 12/07/2012

2:
01 PM

I stood by the Ford-150 and watched Pam’s Beemer go squealing out of the
small parking lot. Her dickless wonder was out of town tonight and Jane of the Jungle’s off to mate with her Tarzan at a Minneapolis hotel near the airport.

I offered my advice to Pam for two main reasons. The first
was so that Pam allowed herself some time to think of her future without it being conditional on the love of another man. The second was I don’t trust rebound love as far as I can throw it, especially when one or both of the people involved were in a marriage when it began. Illicit love was rife with angst and drama and really hot, consuming sex. When all the dust settled, it was back to the everyday life of a real relationship and that’s got to pale in comparison.

If I was really Pam’s friend, I should probably chain her up in the basement of Bel’s for a few weeks because, of course, Pammie didn’t hear a word I
’d said. Wait, I take that back. She heard the part that she could tell Tarzan how she felt, so that he in turn can reassure her they will live happily ever after.

Pammie has squealed off to
take down her man.

Do I think this
was sordid and tacky behavior for a still married lady that calls herself a Christian?

Hmm, don’t know and don’t care, if Pam’s happy, I’m happy.

I do think Pam’s a good woman at heart, but she’s only human. She’s had a small taste of what it’s like to be wanted and loved, and that shined a glaring spotlight on the rest of her life. The past emptiness stood out in miserable relief under that unforgiving brightness. Maybe it would be smarter and look better publically for my friend to wait until after her divorce to pursue her lover, but it wasn’t as if I would take an ad out in the paper to shout to the world that Pam’s sneaking around having jungle sex. I’ve got her back.

The day
was so beautiful that I didn’t climb into the truck, but soaked up some more afternoon sunshine while calling my mechanic, Pete, at Witt Brothers Service garage. I should have done this first thing today and couldn’t believe it slipped my mind. I cursed Luke for this, too.

I
was careful what extra favors I asked of Pete because he’s had a crush on me for years. He’d jump off of a bridge, if it was me doing the asking. He’s also incredibly grateful that I helped his twin brother Patrick two years ago by investing in his start up business. Patrick’s an artist that works in metal and he had a vision of designing and building custom light fixtures. He had a business plan and I loved his work. Now Patrick’s vision was a reality, and I had the coolest, one of kind metal and crystal chandelier hanging in my apartment’s foyer.

Thankfully,
Pete was not only in today, but he eagerly offered to go to Bel’s Books and pick up Lady Liberty to bring her back to the shop, run a diagnostic, and get her fixed. In the middle of the afternoon on a Friday, I was grateful to accept all the help I could get from Pete.

I
got in the truck, backed up, and drove a short distance to a spot in the center of the lot where I could see in all directions. Rolling down the window, I rested an elbow and called Stella next.

My niece answered by stating
flatly, “Word is that I’m not supposed to talk business if you call because you should be naked with Luke.”

“This isn’t business and shame on you, Stella. You’re much too young to be saying words like naked,” I scolded
severely.

She
retorted, giggling, “Have you forgotten I’m pregnant and going to be married soon?”

“Have you forgotten
that’s because you say words like naked?” I accused, roundly.

Stella protested on a laugh
ing whine, “Auntie Bel, I thought you said you supported me!”

I scoffed
, “Well, duh. Of course I’ll support you publically. Privately, you can expect to be showered with the same abusive love and ridicule as normal.” I added piously, “It’s a proven fact children thrive on consistency, niece Stella.”

“Oh,
let me write down that little pearl of wisdom,” Stella drawled.