I'm Just Here for the Food (7 page)

1 medium red beet
4 medium red potatoes
3 tablespoons duck fat or oil
Kosher salt and freshly ground
black pepper
2 tablespoons minced garlic
1 Vidalia or other sweet onion,
diced
1 tablespoon chopped chives
1 duck or chicken egg (optional)

Hardware:

Paring knife
2 cold-water baths
Baking sheet
Large pot of boiling salted water
1 ice-water bath
Salad spinner
Cast-iron pan
Wooden spoon

This dish is best with the delicious Cast-Iron Duck.

Bar-B-Fu

Nobody said that the protein to be seared has to be meat. Pound for pound, tofu is the cheapest form of complete protein around.

Just about every market around today carries a couple of hardnesses of regular or Chinese tofu: soft and firm. Soft tofu can be crumbled like a soft cheese, whereas firm tofu is what you want when you’re going to cook a chunk of the stuff. It acts like a sponge, soaking up whatever liquid it meets, especially if it’s wrung out first. And remember, surface-to-mass ratio determines marinating time, so cut first, then soak (see
Have a Soak
).

Application: Searing

Slice the tofu lengthwise into 4 equal parts and set on a baking sheet lined with paper towels. Place a couple of paper towels on top and lay a second baking sheet on top. Put a couple of cans of food on top of that to weight it down. Set aside for at least 30 minutes.

Meanwhile, mix the garlic, chiles, barbecue sauce, and vinegar. Season the tofu “steaks” with salt and pepper, place the tofu in a zip-top bag, and pour in the barbecue sauce mixture. Allow to marinate for at least 1 hour or overnight.

Drain the marinade off the tofu and reserve. Heat a non-stick pan for about 3 minutes over medium flame. Shake off any excess marinade and add the tofu to the pan. No oil is needed. Don’t move the “steaks” or they will not brown. Using tongs, flip after 2 minutes and allow to brown on the other side. Remove the tofu and place on the rolls. Pour the reserved marinade into the hot pan and add the beer. Allow to reduce to sauce consistency. Pour over the “steaks” and enjoy with some spicy and vinegary slaw. Wash down with the rest of your beer. Isn’t health food great?

Yield: 4 sandwiches

Software:

1 pound firm tofu
1 tablespoon minced garlic
1 tablespoon minced serrano chiles
⅓ cup of your favorite
barbecue sauce
¼ cup apple cider vinegar
Kosher salt and freshly ground
black pepper
4 white hoagie rolls (make sure
the bread is sort of firm and
definitely flavorful; the bread
can make or break this dish)
¾ cup of your favorite beer,
preferably dark (I use Shiner
Bock)

Hardware:

2 baking sheets
Paper towels
Cans of food for weighting
Gallon-size zip-top bag
Non-stick pan
Tongs

Blackened Tuna Steak

I have always suspected that the whole “blackening” phenomenon that crept out of the bayou a decade ago was a clever way to serve burned fish. That said, this powder does turn pretty dark. And yes, it tastes mighty good, too, especially when applied to a fish that can be seared and left darned near raw on the inside—meaning tuna and salmon, but mostly tuna.

This recipe comes from Patrick Matecat, a very American albeit French chef who tolerated my presence in his kitchen for more than a year.

Application: Searing

Combine all the spices and salt in a jar or other lidded container and shake well to combine.

Heat a cast-iron skillet over high heat until it’s hot enough to make a drop of water jump, not just sizzle. Lightly lubricate each piece of tuna with canola oil. Dredge the fish in the spice powder and shake off all possible excess.

Spritz the pan with oil right before adding the fish. This will assure even heating as the crust forms. A 1-inch steak cooked for 2 minutes on each side will be perfectly colored on the outside and just warm on the inside. If you like your tuna cooked a little more, you can remove the pan from the heat, cover loosely with foil and give it another minute on each side. Don’t worry, the pan will stay plenty hot. Thicker steaks should also be seared on the sides by setting edgewise in the pan.

Serve the steak whole or slice thin and fan around a mound of coleslaw.

Note:
If you don’t like the look of what your market has in the case and if you’re planning on serving at least 4 people, ask the fishmonger if he has any whole loins. If so, buy one that’s about 8 inches long and have it sliced into 4 steaks. Never, ever be afraid to ask a butcher or fishmongor to cut something special for you. That’s why he’s there.

Yield: 1 steak

Software:

2 tablespoons paprika
1 tablepoon plus 2 teaspoons
kosher salt
2 teaspoons onion powder
2 teaspoons garlic powder
1 teaspoon cayenne pepper
1½ teaspoons white pepper
1½ teaspoons black pepper
1 teaspoon dried thyme
1 teaspoon dried ginger
1 teaspoon ground cumin
Canola oil
1 tuna steak, 1-inch thick

Hardware:

Glass jar or other lidded container
Cast-iron skillet
Spray bottle for the oil

Pan-Seared Portobello Mushrooms

I tried several approaches before choosing this method of preparing mushrooms. This method produces a nice meaty texture and great mushroom flavor.

Application: Searing

Cut the mushrooms into ¼-inch slices without removing the gills. Heat a cast-iron pan over medium-high heat for about 3 minutes. Mist the mushrooms with oil and season with salt and pepper. Using a paper towel, spread about 1 teaspoon oil in the pan. Lay the slices of mushroom in the pan without overlapping, and sear, without moving them, for 5 minutes. Flip them over, cook for another 5 minutes, and serve. Some things are as simple as they seem.

Yield: 2 appetizer servings

Software:

2 portobello mushroom caps
Olive oil
Kosher salt
Freshly ground black pepper

Hardware:

Cast-iron pan or heavy sauté pan
Spray bottle for the oil
Paper towel
Tongs

Chick On a Stick (Chicken Satay)

Application: Sear

I realize that satay is usually grilled, but I’ve come to the conclusion that the dish is better when cooked on a solid metal surface.

Pound each chicken breast between two pieces of plastic wrap until they’re approximately ¼ inch thick. Cut each breast into 1-inch strips and set aside.

I find this is much easier to do it if the plastic is just barely wet, so I keep a spritz bottle on hand.

Whisk together the garlic, peanut butter, coconut milk, sesame oil, hoisin, lime juice, ginger, salt, and pepper in a small mixing bowl. Move ½ cup of the mix to a large zip top bag, add the chicken, and seal the bag, removing as much air as possible without actually sucking it out. Goosh it around in your fingers and revel in the fact that a layer of (mostly) impermeable plastic protects you from the potential bio-bomb of poultry inside. Refrigerate for 2 hours.

Software:

4 boneless skinless chicken breasts
6 cloves garlic, minced
½ cup peanut butter
½ cup coconut milk
2 tablespoons sesame oil
¼ cup hoisin sauce
2 tablespoons plus 1 teaspoon
fresh lime juice
1 tablespoon freshly grated ginger
1 tablespoon Kosher salt
1½ teaspoon freshly ground
black pepper

Hardware:

Meat mallet or pounder
Plastic wrap
Cutting board
Chef’s knife
Plunger cup
Microplane or other fine grater
Whisk
Small mixing bowl
1-gallon sealable plastic bag
24 to 30 6-inch bamboo skewers
Cast iron griddle
Tongs

Cover the remaining sauce and hold at room temperature until your ready to serve (assuming, of course, that you’re going to serve this the same day).

Remove the chicken from the marinade and thread each piece onto a separate bamboo skewer. Needless to say, you should throw the marinade away immediately as it is now a potential bio-hazard.

Heat the griddle to 275° F. Place the satay onto griddle (do not crowd them) and cook for 1½ to 3 minutes per side, depending on the size of the piece of chicken. Serve immediately with the reserved sauce for dipping.

Yield: 4 servings

CHAPTER 2

Grilling

There are a great many things one can learn to do without actually doing them. Grilling is not one of them.

A View to a Grill

I am sitting here in a 28-foot Ambassador-class Airstream trailer. Constructed of shiny clean aluminum in 1978, its curvy interior, overhead storage, and pop-out tables epitomize modern design. I am typing on a Macintosh G4 Titanium Powerbook, which is roving through my MP3 collection like a digital whirling dervish. When I need to speak to someone, which isn’t very often since the G4 is wirelessly connected to the Web through a device in the house, I do so on a Nokia cell phone capable of trading files with my Palm V, which I really should replace since it’s so 1999. When I need a break I torture my cat by tracing designs on the wall with the mini-laser pointer on my key chain. Soon, though, I will go outside and set a fire in a contraption that looks like Sputnik, and cook a piece of cow. The point is: I am a modern guy but the cooking I enjoy the most is the kind that’s been around the longest—over fire.

Why have a laser on a key chain? Because you can, of course.

Cooking over open coals, a process which, depending on who you ask, is called either broiling, grilling, or roasting, has been around since the first caveman noticed that the rack of mammoth hanging by the fire didn’t turn green and stinky as quickly as the one left by the door. Drying and the curative powers of smoke were no doubt responsible, but it didn’t take long for some Cro-Magnon klutz to drop dinner in the fire. And it was good. A lot less chewy and kind of yummy. Sure, it was gritty from lying in the coals, but soon (a thousand years, tops) some Og or Ogetta stuck a spear in the meat and, well, any Boy Scout or Girl Scout knows the rest. Grilling is huge to this day, but don’t think for a minute that this has to do with flavor or getting outdoors or any other culinary concerns.