I See You (23 page)

‘And what are you going to do?’ he cried.

‘I’ll … recuperate,’ she said. ‘And when I’m ready, I’ll go home.’

‘Are you kidding? Home? You’ll be a sitting duck. You think I’m just going to leave you there, for her to come after? To finish the job?’

‘I’ll figure out a way to protect myself. Or I won’t. In a way, it doesn’t even matter anymore. My only child tried to kill me. I don’t even want to get up each day and think about that. But you have to keep Sydney away from her. No matter what. You just have to go.’

‘I won’t,’ he said. Tears stood in his eyes. ‘I won’t leave you.’

‘You haven’t got any choice,’ she said sadly. She entwined her fingers with his. ‘We haven’t got any choice.’

‘T
ime to go back to your room,’ said the nurse, releasing the brake on Hannah’s wheelchair and interrupting her urgent tête-à-tête with Adam. ‘They’re bringing your dinner.’

Hannah looked up guiltily. ‘Just give me two minutes,’ she said.

The nurse frowned but nodded. ‘I’ll be back in exactly two minutes.’

Hannah gave her the OK sign, and the nurse went back out into the corridor.

‘Two minutes?’ Adam cried. ‘Are you kidding? We can’t. I’m not ready.’

Hannah looked over at Sydney, and her lip trembled. But she did not allow herself to weep. ‘Sweetheart,’ she called out, ‘you have to go with Pop now. Pop will get you some dinner.’ Hannah touched the bandages on her head and forced herself to smile. ‘I have to stay here until I’m better. Doctor’s orders. You go on now.’

Sydney rushed to Hannah and tried to embrace her. Hannah reached for her, and hugged her back as fiercely as the pain would allow.

Then she turned to Adam. She entwined her fingers with his again and gripped them with all her might. ‘You are the one person in my whole life who I could always trust, no matter what. You still are.’

They stared into one another’s eyes. Confusion and desperation were mingled in his intense gaze. For a moment Hannah thought he might refuse. For a moment, she wanted him to. Then he nodded. ‘You can count on me,’ he said.

‘I never doubted it,’ she said. ‘Goodbye, my darling. Keep our girl safe.’

Adam hugged her as if he would crush her. Hannah held on to him for a desperate minute, and then pulled away from his embrace.

She gazed at him resolutely. ‘I love you both. Forever.’

He nodded, and forced himself to stand up. ‘Come on, Sydney,’ he said, extending his hand to his granddaughter. ‘Come with Pop.’

After they left, the nurse came, and wheeled Hannah back to her room. She helped her into bed, and Hannah collapsed onto the scratchy sheets. A short time later, an orderly came in with her dinner, and put the tray on the rolling table. Hannah looked at the food, and felt her stomach contract. She shook her head.

‘I can’t,’ she said. ‘Please, take it away.’

The orderly obeyed without comment. Hannah lay back and stared at her own reflection in the dark window of her room. Was this the best thing to do? They couldn’t just wait for Lisa to come and take Sydney away with her. Their choices were few. Where would they go, she wondered, thinking of Adam and Sydney, driving through the dark night? Would she ever see them again? she wondered. Or was that their last goodbye?

Tears began to trickle down her face but she wiped them away angrily.

No, she thought. This is your punishment. You deserve this. You should have realized, somewhere along the line, that your daughter lacked humanity. You should have acknowledged it and sought help, instead of making excuses for Lisa. She berated herself for a while, and then she stopped. She knew that she still had a job to do at this end. This was her plan, and she had to try her best to make it work. She reached over to the bedside table for her phone, grimacing at the pain it cost her to twist her body to one side. She groped for the phone and found it.

It took her a moment to catch her breath. Then she dialed the number of Restoration House and let it ring. Father Luke answered shortly.

‘Father Luke,’ she exclaimed with sincere relief. ‘I’m so glad I caught you.’

‘Anna, is that you?’ he asked.

Hannah nodded. ‘Yes. I’m … still in the hospital.’

‘Well, I’m not surprised,’ said the priest, ‘given the shape you were in.’

‘I’d like to talk to you,’ she said. ‘I was wondering if you could come by the hospital tomorrow.’

‘Of course, dear,’ he said. ‘With pleasure.’

‘And, if possible, could you bring Spencer?’

‘Spencer? My … Mr White?’

‘Yes,’ said Hannah. She could hear the surprise in Father Luke’s voice. Hannah had only met Spencer White, the black accountant with whom Father Luke lived, a time or two, notably at the birthday party which Spencer had hosted for his life partner. ‘I have a good reason.’

‘Well,’ said Father Luke slowly, ‘I will certainly ask him.’

‘Thanks,’ said Hannah. ‘Please tell him it’s important.’

‘I’ll do that,’ said the priest.

‘And, if you could …’

‘What?’ he asked.

‘Could you get a message to Kiyanna and Frank?’

‘I can call them, sure. They already left a few hours ago.’

‘Tell them …’ Hannah hesitated. ‘Tell them that Syd— Cindy is fine for tonight. They shouldn’t worry. Cindy won’t be coming over. She and Alan are staying here at the hospital.’

‘I’ll tell them. Is there anything else?’

‘No,’ said Hannah. ‘Nothing else.’

‘All right, then,’ said Father Luke. ‘I’ll see you tomorrow.’

‘Tomorrow,’ Hannah repeated. ‘And thank you, Father.’

‘Try not to worry,’ he said. ‘I’ll pray for you.’

Hannah ended the call, and thought about what the former priest had said. She did not think much about praying, though she often thanked God for her blessings. And she had certainly asked for strength from time to time.

Maybe it would help, she thought. Nothing could feel worse than the agony she felt in her heart right now. She decided to pray for help to face her ordeal and, as she did, she fell almost instantly asleep.

Someone was shaking her awake. Hannah opened her eyes and looked around groggily. Then she suddenly remembered where she was. She remembered that Adam and Sydney were gone, and she remembered all that she was facing. Dark thoughts crowded inside her head. Outside of the windows, the day seemed to be just breaking. She turned over gingerly in her bed, wincing at the pain and stiffness after spending the night fast asleep in one position.

A nurse, pale with dark circles under her eyes, leaned over her. ‘You have a visitor,’ she said.

‘It’s not visiting hours,’ Hannah protested.

‘It’s the Father. He comes and goes whenever,’ said the nurse.

Father Luke, Hannah thought. ‘Oh. Yes,’ she said. ‘OK. I asked him to come. Tell him to come in.’

The nurse nodded and padded out of the room. In a few minutes the door opened, and Father Luke entered, followed by Spencer White. Father Luke was a quick, wiry man with white hair and impish eyes. Spencer was large and dignified, with mocha-colored skin and close-cropped hair. He wore black horn-rimmed glasses, and a conservative brown suit with a tan shirt and a geometric patterned tie.

The two men crossed the room and stood beside her bed. Father Luke grasped her hand and smiled at her. ‘Sorry to be so early. Spencer has an audit to prepare for in Media today. We thought we better stop by here early, before he has to get underway.’

‘Thank you for coming,’ said Hannah. ‘Both of you.’

Father Luke waved off her thanks. ‘I’m curious as to why you wanted to see Spencer.’

Hannah looked from Father Luke to Spencer, who was watching her cautiously, uncertain what sort of request to expect. Hannah took a deep breath. ‘This has to be in the strictest confidence.’

‘Of course,’ said Father Luke.

Spencer nodded.

‘I found out yesterday,’ said Hannah, ‘that what happened to me was not … random. My life – our lives, are in danger. I can’t tell you more than that.’

‘Did you tell the police?’ asked Father Luke, shocked by this news.

Hannah looked at him helplessly. ‘I can’t. I have my reasons.’

‘Anna, this situation has gotten out of hand.’

‘I know that, Father. That’s why I called you.’

Father Luke nodded. ‘Well, what can we do? Does Alan know about this? Because if he doesn’t, you should certainly confide in him.’

‘Alan and Cindy have gone. They left with just the clothes on their backs.’

‘They left what? The hospital?’

‘The hospital. Philly. The state. They’re headed west.’

‘They left you here all alone?’

‘I insisted,’ said Hannah firmly. ‘I’m not looking for sympathy. This was what I wanted. It was my idea. They are not safe here. They had to go. The thing is, we have our bags all packed and in the attic of Mamie Revere’s house, where our apartment was. But the house is … probably being watched.’

Spencer’s face wore an expression of distaste. Father Luke’s was all compassion. ‘Oh, Anna, this is terrible.’

Hannah felt unnerved by his concern. She did her best to remain resolute. ‘That’s why I need your help. I need you to get the bags for us. And to get them to Alan. When they find a place to stay, you can send them.’

‘Of course. I can do that,’ said Father Luke.

‘Actually,’ said Hannah, turning her gaze to the well-dressed black man, ‘I want Spencer to do it.’

Spencer started. ‘Why me?’ he asked, recoiling from the suggestion.

Hannah hesitated. She did not want her idea to sound insulting. It was just a practical reality. Spencer was black and would blend in. It would appear normal for him to enter the house. Father Luke, on the other hand, might cause a blip on the radar. ‘Whoever is … watching us, thinks that my husband and my … child are staying here at the hospital, with me. I don’t want anyone, especially not this person in question, to know that Alan and Cindy are trying to get far away. The more time I can buy for them, the better. The thing is … the person watching us probably already knows about Father Luke and Restoration House. If Father Luke goes in and comes out with baggage, the person I’m worried about might be alerted. Might put two and two together. Probably would. But if Spencer went in … It would appear natural. Mamie’s in the hospital. Someone from her family might well show up there to pick up some of her things for her and bring them to her at the nursing home.’

‘Does this person know everything about your lives?’ asked Father Luke incredulously.

‘I don’t know. But I have to think ahead. I have to assume the worst.’ She looked from one man to the other. Father Luke gazed back at her openly. Spencer seemed skeptical.

‘I know this all sounds weird and paranoid. I wish I could tell you more,’ said Hannah.

Spencer looked at her with narrowed eyes. ‘So do I.’

Father Luke looked sadly at Hannah but he spoke to Spencer. ‘Hannah is in a lot of pain. She needs us to help her.’

Spencer sighed. ‘You want me to go in, pick up the packed bags and bring them out. And do what? Take them home?’

‘Yes, I guess so,’ said Hannah. ‘When things settle down I’ll let you know where to ship them.’

Spencer shook his head. ‘Call me dim but I have to ask. Aren’t you going back to that house yourself when you’ve recovered? Can’t you send the bags?’

‘This person might follow me. Find out where I’m sending them.’

Spencer frowned at the priest. ‘I don’t like this,’ he said.

Father Luke shrugged. ‘That’s up to you. If you don’t want to do it, then don’t. It’s just a request, right?’ he asked, looking at Hannah.

‘Yes,’ Hannah whispered, gazing down at her own hands lying limp on the covers.

‘Give me the keys and we’ll see what we can do,’ said Father Luke.

Hannah slid open the drawer of her bedside table and reached in. She pulled out the keys and handed them to the priest. ‘I wouldn’t ask you if I wasn’t desperate.’

Spencer was already shaking his head.

‘He’s very law-abiding,’ said Father Luke apologetically.

‘I don’t need for him to break the law,’ Hannah protested.

‘I can hear you,’ said Spencer in a frosty tone. ‘Luke, can we go now? I need to get to Media.’ Glancing impatiently at his watch, Spencer headed toward the door. He turned back to Hannah. ‘I hope you feel better soon,’ he said.

Hannah nodded and pressed her lips together in a dejected expression.

‘Don’t worry,’ said Father Luke. ‘I know him. He’ll do it. He just has to get used to the idea. But, Anna, I have to say, are you really intending to go back to that house all by yourself? Knowing that the person who pushed you in the subway is still out there, hoping to … harm you?’

Hannah felt agitated. Spencer had already balked at her plan. She didn’t want to think about what was going to transpire when she went home. She definitely didn’t want to speculate aloud about it. ‘I’ll be here a while longer. I’m not leaving anytime soon,’ she said. ‘My recovery … you know. It will take some time.’

Father Luke’s eyes were filled with worry. ‘I’ll let you get some rest. You need it.’ He put a hand on hers. ‘Would you like us to pray together?’

It won’t do any good, Hannah thought hopelessly. But she nodded. ‘Sure,’ she said. ‘I need all the help I can get.’

T
hree days later, when Hannah was about to be released, Frank Petrusa was dispatched by Father Luke to pick her up. Hannah understood immediately why he had been chosen. Based on what she had told him, Father Luke was worried that they might encounter some kind of confrontation when Hannah returned to Mamie Revere’s house, and Frank, an ex-recon marine, was the best man to handle such a situation. Even with one hand missing, he had an air of indomitability. Hannah sat in the wheelchair brought to her room by the nurse, her purse on her lap, waiting for him. She gazed out at the gray day, and wondered what misery this homecoming might bring. If Lisa were still watching the house she would know instantly, the moment that Hannah arrived home in a stranger’s car, that Adam and Sydney were gone. What would she do then?

Her phone rang and Hannah jumped, her heart already thumping at the thought of her daughter’s implacable anger. She knew it wasn’t Lisa. Only Adam had this number. Adam and Father Luke.

Adam had called several times during that week, but said they were not yet settled in a place. Hannah knew that they had headed west, toward Chicago but not which state they were in. Adam did not want to be specific. ‘The less you know, the better,’ he told her.

Hannah answered the phone cautiously, and was relieved to hear his voice. She explained that despite his reluctance, Spencer White had retrieved the suitcases and brought them to his house without incident. Of course, there was nowhere to send them as yet. Or was there? she asked.

Adam sighed. ‘No, not yet. How are you feeling?’

‘I’m … better,’ she said.

‘A lot better?’ he asked.

‘I’m going home today,’ she said.

Adam was silent at the other end.

‘Frank Petrusa is picking me up, and getting me settled in. I’ll be in good hands,’ she said.

‘Until he leaves,’ Adam said in a gloomy tone. ‘Hannah, I wish I had never agreed to this.’

Hannah ignored the desperation in his voice. ‘How is Sydney?’

Adam had reported that Sydney had been cooperative and quiet during the journey. ‘Can a child be depressed?’ he asked Hannah.

‘Yes, certainly,’ said Hannah.

‘Then she’s depressed.’

‘I don’t doubt it,’ Hannah said.

Frank appeared at the doorway of her room and tapped on the open door. Hannah motioned for him to come in.

‘Adam, I have to go,’ she whispered. ‘Frank is here.’

She did not give him a chance to pour out all his anxiety and his fears. She murmured her love and ended the call. She looked up expectantly at Frank.

‘You ready?’ he said.

Hannah nodded.

‘No bags?’

‘Just my purse,’ she said.

‘Let’s hit it,’ he said. He came around behind the wheelchair and put up the brake.

Hannah nodded, though her heart was pounding double time. ‘Ready,’ she said.

They discussed work a little bit as Frank drove her back to West Philadelphia. He told her that Dominga Flores was now out of rehab and staying at Restoration House and participating in his PTSD groups.

‘Oh, I’m glad,’ said Hannah. ‘I was on my way to see her when …’

‘Your accident,’ said Frank.

Hannah nodded. ‘Seems like years ago. Well, it’s good we got her back at the House. She needs that kind of support.’

‘She does indeed,’ said Frank. ‘When you get back to work you’ll probably have a chance to help her sort things out.’

‘If I get back to work,’ said Hannah.

Frank frowned. ‘Father Luke told me that your husband is gone. With Cindy. He said that was the way you wanted it. What happened there, Anna?’

Hannah shook her head. ‘Nothing,’ she said.

‘It doesn’t sound like nothing. It sounds like you might be in danger. Why did Alan agree to leave you here all alone? I’m really surprised by that.’

‘The most important thing is Cindy’s safety,’ she said.

‘Why is Cindy in danger?’ Frank asked.

Suddenly she felt too tired to try to explain. She shook her head and looked out the car window at the city streets, thinking about all the plans that she and Adam had made when they decided to move here. They would take Sydney to the theater, the zoo and the Please Touch museum. They had done all of those things and more, although they had always found it difficult to relax and enjoy these outings in the city. Some part of them was always looking around. Always wondering. They dreamed of a day when their lives would truly feel like their own again. Now, Hannah doubted if there would ever be such a day. In a strange way, she was almost relieved that Lisa had found her. No more running away. She knew that the next time she encountered Lisa was going to be soon. It was only a matter of how soon.

‘OK,’ said Frank. ‘I’m not gonna pry.’ Frank drove expertly through the maze of streets, and pulled up against the curb in front of Mamie Revere’s house. Hannah looked out the window, and then did a double take to see the For Sale sign planted in the patch of brown grass in front.

‘He’s selling the house,’ she said. ‘I can’t believe it.’

‘Who?’ Frank asked.

‘Isaiah Revere,’ said Hannah.

‘The councilman?’

‘Yes. He grew up in this house. His mother, Mamie, owns it. But Mamie would never leave this place voluntarily. She loves it. It’s her home.’

Frank shrugged. ‘You can get too old to be on your own.’

‘I suppose,’ said Hannah with a sigh. For a brief moment, painful memories of Pamela crossed her mind. She forced herself not to think about her mother, spending her life in that assisted care facility, her family vanished. She reminded herself that right now, she couldn’t be worrying about her mother. Hannah herself felt too fragile to be on her own. But it would pass, she thought. She just had to put one foot in front of the other. Daunting as it seemed, she reached for the handle of the car door. ‘Frank, I can’t thank you enough for bringing me home. And you and Kiyanna, for taking care of … Cindy while I was in the hospital.’

‘Kiyanna enjoyed it,’ he said. ‘I did too. Cindy’s a sweet kid.’

‘Can I speak like your big sister?’ Hannah said, feigning severity. ‘You should marry that girl. Kiyanna is a gem. Not that it’s any of my business …’

‘That’s all right,’ he said. ‘I think so too.’

Hannah smiled and pressed down the door handle.

‘Anna, hold it a minute,’ said Frank.

Hannah turned to look at him, as he groped under the driver’s seat with his good hand, and rummaged around. He found what he was seeking and pulled it out, placing it on the seat. Hannah looked down at the scuffed wooden box between them.

‘I have something for you,’ he said.

‘What is that?’ she said.

Frank looked around in all directions. The street was quiet, and the bright autumn day had faded to gray. He made sure there was no one near the car, and then he undid the latch and opened the box. Hannah frowned, and then gasped, as he raised the lid.

Resting in the case was a black semiautomatic handgun. ‘Do you know anything about guns?’ he asked.

Hannah shook her head.

Frank sighed. ‘This one is really very simple to use. And I think it would be a good idea for you to be armed. We’ll take it in the house and I can show you.’

‘Why did you bring that?’ she demanded.

Frank shrugged. ‘Call it a gut feeling.’

‘Is that your gun?’

‘One of them,’ he said. He peered at her. ‘Don’t worry. I keep them locked up at home. Cindy never even got near one of these, I promise you.’

‘Put it away, Frank. I appreciate the thought but …’

‘Look, I know this is all unfamiliar territory. But you need to be … ready. For anything. Just a short lesson, and you would at least be able to fire it in an emergency.’

Hannah shook her head. ‘I don’t think so.’

‘Anna,’ said Frank patiently, ‘if you’re right about this, we’re dealing with someone who pushed you in front of a subway train. From what Father Luke told me, you are still afraid for your life. You need to have this. You might have to use it.’

Hannah tried to think coherently about what he was saying, although the sight of the gun unnerved her. She shook her head again. ‘I couldn’t,’ she said. ‘There’s no point. I really couldn’t.’

‘You’d be surprised,’ Frank said. ‘You’d be surprised what you can do when you’re facing your own death.’

Hannah raised her gaze from the gun and stared through the windshield of Frank’s old jeep. ‘I’m sure you’re right,’ she said. ‘But I could never shoot her.’

Frank raised his eyebrows. ‘Her? It’s a woman?’

‘Yes,’ Hannah whispered.

Frank stared at her. ‘Well, you might surprise yourself. If she’s threatening your life, you might be able to use it on a woman. Take it, just in case.’

Hannah turned and looked at him. His eyes seemed to gleam in the dim light which bathed the front seat through the windshield. ‘You’ll have to take my word for it, Frank. I couldn’t shoot it at her. No matter what.’

Frank peered at her. ‘It’s someone you know, isn’t it?’

‘Yes. Someone who … believes I have betrayed her.’

‘Have you?’

Hannah sat silent for a moment. ‘I tried not to. But … yes. I suppose I did.’

Frank slowly closed the lid on the box.

Hannah pushed open the car door. She turned and looked at him. ‘Thank you for thinking of it, though. I know you’re only trying to protect me. You, Kiyanna and Father Luke. You’ve all been so kind to me. But this is as far as it can go. I have to face the next part by myself.’

‘Anna,’ he said, ‘if someone you know is stalking you, you need to tell the police. They can protect you. There’s no reason to just be … a human target.’

Hannah shook her head. ‘It’s not that simple. Listen, the only other person who knows about this is Father Luke. I need to keep it that way. Will you do that for me? Keep it to yourself?’

Frank sighed. ‘Do you even have a plan?’

Hannah hesitated. ‘I’ve thought a lot about it.’

He waited for her to say more but she was done with explaining.

‘I’m very tired,’ she said. ‘I’m going inside.’

‘Let me walk you in,’ he said, opening his door.

‘I’d appreciate that,’ said Hannah.

Once they had made their way up the dark path and into the unlit house, Frank ordered Hannah to sit down while he looked through the house.

‘This is Mamie’s part of the house,’ Hannah protested. ‘She has the first two floors. We live upstairs, on the third floor.’

‘I’m sure she won’t mind you sitting here while you wait,’ said Frank. ‘It looks as if nobody’s been here in quite a while.’

‘No,’ said Hannah, sitting down with a sigh. ‘It’s a lonely house now.’

In fact, Hannah was relieved to sit down. She was utterly exhausted from the ordeal of leaving the hospital. She huddled in the corner of Mamie’s overstuffed, pillow-laden sofa and looked sadly around at the lifeless room that had once been part of a bustling home. Every photo, every memento seemed to be waiting for Mamie’s return. But that would likely never happen – the house would be sold. Life would move on. Hannah could hear Frank’s heavy tread going up the staircase, through the house and back down. She could hear doors slamming and windows being raised and lowered again. As she heard him start down from the third floor, Hannah called out to warn him about the rickety banister. If he heard her, he didn’t slacken his pace.

He came into Mamie’s living room. ‘All clear up there,’ he said.

‘Thanks, Frank,’ said Hannah, getting up. ‘You may as well get home. It’s gonna take me a while to climb these stairs.’

‘I wish you’d reconsider,’ he said. ‘You could stay with Kiyanna and me. We wouldn’t mind.’

Hannah did not want to discuss it any further. She knew that his offer was genuine, but also that she wouldn’t accept it. She had come back here to face whatever lay ahead. There was nothing to discuss. ‘You better get home to her,’ she said. ‘I can’t thank you enough.’

Frank started to protest, but then he shook his head. ‘Call me if you need me.’

‘I will,’ said Hannah, though she knew she wouldn’t. She had already involved him too far in these problems of her own making. From now on, she was determined to face them alone. Afraid but determined.

She wanted to tell herself that she had nothing to fear from Lisa. But every painful step reminded her that this was simply not true. She locked the door behind Frank then walked to the foot of the staircase, turned on the light above it and looked up. It seemed like an impossible climb. She put her foot on the first step.