I Saw Her Standing There (32 page)

“You can blame Fred, too.”

“Good. Thanks. That helps.”

“Let’s go do this so we can get to tomorrow faster.”

With his hand on Will’s arm, Colton stopped his brother from walking away. “Nothing says we have to stay here all night.”

“What do you mean?”

“After everyone crashes, we could head down the hill and go find our girls.”

“Not planning to drink?”

“Not really in the mood. You?”

“Not so much.”

“So it’s a plan?”

Will smiled at him. “If they ever find out, they’ll call us pussy-whipped assholes for the rest of our lives.”

“I’m willing to risk it.”

Will fist-bumped his brother. “Me, too.”

Cords of wood burned: 32. Without the reverse-osmosis machine, we would have needed five times as much wood. Granted, the reverse-osmosis machine uses a lot of fuel, but the overall fuel and cost savings are high. Bags of oranges eaten while boiling: 26.

—Colton Abbott’s sugaring journal, after the boil

S
urrounded by most of his favorite men, Nolan settled in to enjoy his last hurrah as a single guy. While he couldn’t wait to be married to Hannah in one short week, a night away from it all with the guys was no hardship. He’d thought everyone who was coming had already arrived when two huge SUVs came into the yard and almost all of the Sultans came pouring out of the two trucks.

“What’s this we heard about a bachelor party?” Turk asked in the loud bellow that was his trademark. He had an unlit cigar hanging out of his mouth as he came toward them, followed by Jack, who had his guitar strung over his shoulder, then Austin, Ethan, Liam, Josh, Mark and Dylan—all of them Caleb Guthrie’s best friends. Over the years, Caleb’s friends from his years as an Army brat, college hockey star and later as an Army officer had merged with his childhood friends in Butler, including Nolan, Hunter and Will. No one had been more adept at blending all his friends into one big group he called the Sultans than Caleb.

“Oh my God,” Nolan said to himself more than anyone else. The guys had come from all over the country. He hadn’t expected to see them here. As close friends of both his and Hannah’s, they’d been invited to the wedding, but to have them here now, too, was almost more than Nolan could process.

He stood to receive their handshakes and man hugs. “What’re you guys doing here?”

“We came for the week,” Turk said. “Our brother Nolan is getting married to our patron saint Hannah. Where else would we be?”

Nolan shook his head in amazement. “I’m so glad you’re here.”

“We wouldn’t be anywhere else,” Austin said with a squeeze for Nolan’s shoulder. “Now where’s the beer? We were promised beer!”

“We brought the Jäger,” Liam said, proudly producing a bottle from behind his back.

“Of course you did,” Nolan said, laughing. As the son of a drunk and a drug addict, he’d realized early on in life that it wasn’t in his best interest to drink the way a lot of his friends did. He enjoyed a beer or two. Sometimes, on nights like this, he might even have three. But you wouldn’t catch him anywhere near a bottle of Jägermeister.

“Good surprise?” Hunter asked when he joined Nolan.

“Amazing surprise. It’s very . . . humbling . . . to have Caleb’s crew here. I was wondering though . . . Is Gavin coming?” Nolan asked of Caleb’s brother, another of Nolan’s close friends from childhood.

“He’s supposed to be bringing his dad. I hope they get here soon. It’s almost time to eat.”

Hunter and the other Abbott brothers had been manning the grill for an hour now, cooking steaks and baked potatoes, the smell of which was apparently enough to bring Fred strolling through their makeshift camp for a look-see.

“Holy shit,” Turk said, the cigar falling from his mouth as he backpedaled out of the way of the moose, knocking over his chair as he went. “Why’re you guys just sitting there? Do something.”

“That’s just Fred,” Landon said, taking a swig of his beer.

“He’s harmless,” Wade added as he threw another log on the fire.

“That thing is fucking huge,” Austin said, the other Sultans nodding in agreement while they kept a close watch on Fred.

When he’d satisfied his curiosity, Fred continued on his way.

“Jesus,” Turk said when he returned to his seat by the fire. “Took five freaking years off my life.”

Laughing at the Sultans’ reaction to Fred, Nolan said, “This is a pretty fancy bachelor party, Hunter.” He gestured to the steak on the grill. “Thanks for going all out.”

Hunter laughed. “Only you would think camping on the mountain was fancy.”

“I can’t think of anything I’d rather do or any guys I’d rather do it with.” He held his bottle up to Hunter. “Thank you.”

Hunter touched his bottle to Nolan’s. “My pleasure. Enjoy yourself. It’s your big night.”

His big night. As Nolan looked around at the men who’d come from near and far to celebrate his upcoming wedding, he felt blessed beyond measure. After growing up without much family to speak of, the family he’d chosen for himself and the one he was marrying into had more than filled the void left by his absent parents. Still, he couldn’t help but wish the people who’d brought him into this world would care enough to see him marry the love of his life.

But that wasn’t going to happen, so he’d found contentment with what he had and didn’t spend much time wishing for things that would never be. His glass was way more than half full, especially now that he had a family of his own to look forward to with Hannah. On Monday they’d had an appointment to confirm what multiple pregnancy tests had already indicated—she was pregnant, and they were thrilled beyond measure.

Only because he was keeping half an eye on the hill did he see the sweep of headlights that preceded the arrival of Gavin Guthrie and his father, Bob. Honored that Gavin and his father had come, Nolan held back, giving them a chance to see the others first. Each of the Sultans greeted the Guthries with warm hugs and lots of laughter.

Nolan was deeply, profoundly thankful for the future he had planned with Hannah. But in that moment, he would’ve given up his own happiness and everything else he had to see Caleb Guthrie standing in the middle of this gathering he would’ve enjoyed so much.

Bob came over to Nolan and greeted him with a hug. “Congratulations to the groom-to-be.”

“Thank you, Bob. And thanks for being here.”

“Glad to be here. Gav had a last-minute crisis at work or we would’ve been here earlier.”

“You’re right in time for steak,” Hunter said, pressing a beer into Bob’s hand. The two of them headed toward the grill.

Gavin wandered over a few minutes later and shook hands with Nolan. He’d initially objected to Nolan’s relationship with Hannah but had since come around. Even knowing that Gavin’s objection came from a place of relentless grief over the loss of his brother, it had been hard for Nolan and Hannah to handle. The three of them were good now, but Nolan knew the idea of Hannah getting married again had to be tearing Gavin up inside. “Nice turnout you got here, pal,” Gavin said.

“It’s incredible. I had no idea the Sultans were coming.”

“You’re one of them. Where else would they be?”

“That’s what they said, too.”

“I haven’t been up here in years.” Gavin took a long look around at the familiar buildings that made up the Abbott family’s sugarhouse and Colton’s cabin. “Brings back a lot of memories. Remember all the nights we spent up here when we were kids?”

“Those were some good times. The best of times.”

“Yes, they were. I’m really happy for you, Nolan. For both of you. I hope you know that.”

“Thank you. That means a lot to me, and I know it will to Hannah, too.”

“I’m ready for a beer. Can I get you one?”

“Sure, I’m due for another. Hey, Gav?”

“Yeah?”

“I’m really glad you’re here.”

Gavin’s smile didn’t light up his face the way it used to, but it was sincere nonetheless. “Wouldn’t have missed it.”

*   *   *

“The first time I came here, this road was full of potholes,” Cameron said as she drove down the long dirt lane that led to her and Will’s place. “Mud season.”

“Ah yes,” Lucy said. “Mud has a season in Vermont.”

“It’s one of Vermont’s many charms.”

“A year ago, if you’d told me you’d be living way out in the boonies espousing the charms of something called mud season, I would’ve laughed my ass off.”

“I would’ve been laughing right along with you.”

“Look at us now. In deep and getting deeper all the time with two brothers from Vermont.”

“You forgot sexy. Two
sexy
brothers from Vermont.”

“Sorry for the oversight. They are indeed sexy.”

“So you’re in deep, huh?”

“Yeah.”

“You don’t sound too happy about it.”

“I am happy. When we’re together.” Lucy blew out a deep breath. “It’s just, the rest of it . . .”

“I know, honey.” Cameron parked, turned off the car and reached over to squeeze Lucy’s arm. “Come in, see my new home, have a glass of wine, get comfy and we’ll talk it out.”

“Sounds good.” Lucy got out of the SUV and took a good look around at the gorgeous spot where Will had built the home he now shared with Cameron. “This is beautiful, Cam.”

“Isn’t it? I felt at home the first time Will brought me here, before we were even officially dating.”

Cameron released the dogs from the backseat and they took off toward the trees.

“Will they be okay?” Lucy asked as they disappeared from view.

“They’ll be back in a few minutes. It’s part of the routine.”

“You already have a routine here.”

“I do. It’s home.”

Carrying the backpack she’d brought to spend the night with Cam, Lucy walked into the cozy cabin. “This is fantastic.”

“Not much to it.” Cameron spread her arms. “Living room, kitchen, bedroom, bathroom, loft up there where you’ll be staying. Everything we need, but no frills.”

“Is the bathroom inside the house?”

“Yes. Why?”

“Then compared to Colton’s place, this is the Ritz. Though both places have plenty to recommend them. It’s so quiet. Does that ever drive you crazy?” She dropped her backpack on a chair inside the door.

“Not at all. I thought I’d miss the action of the city, but I don’t. I’m so busy and engaged here that I don’t have time to miss New York. I miss you and my dad and everyone there, but the city itself? Not so much.”

“I like it here. I honestly do. But I don’t think I could ever really leave the city.”

Cameron opened a bottle of red and poured them both a glass. “It’s in your blood.”

“It wasn’t in yours?”

“Not the way Will is.” She leaned forward, elbows on the counter. “Talk to me, Luce. What’re you thinking?”

“The truth?”

“And nothing but.”

“I need to end this with Colton before I get in any deeper. There’s no way this can work long term with the two of us living so far apart, and the more time I spend with him, the harder it gets to think about leaving him.”

“If you end it with him, you’ll spend the rest of your life wondering if you let the love of your life get away.”

“So which awful scenario is better—that or ending up a few months from now crushed and heartbroken when the whole thing blows up in our faces?”

“What if it doesn’t blow up? What if it works out perfectly? Here, there and anywhere the two of you are together?”

“How can it work perfectly when we don’t live in the same place?”

“You love him. He loves you. Why not have faith that it’s all going to be fine?”

“Because I’m far more convinced that it’s not going to be fine.”

“Will said Colton has never been this way with any girl. Ever.”

That news sent a happy jolt to Lucy’s heart. “What way?”

“Smitten, gaga, demonstrative. Obviously in love. I told him I’ve never seen you this way either.”

Lucy fiddled with the stem of her wineglass. “I want to be happy and enjoy it and say to hell with all the worries. I want to be that person, the one who can go along like it’s no big deal that we have this huge obstacle standing between us. But I’m not that person. I haven’t been her in a very long time.”

“Since your mom died and you had to grow up overnight and take care of everyone and everything.”

Lucy dropped her head to her folded arms.

Cameron came around the counter to rest her hand on Lucy’s back.

“I can’t let this crush me, Cam. I just can’t.”

“I understand. I don’t like it, but I get it. When will you tell him?”

“After the wedding.”

“That’s a week from now.”

“I know. I thought about telling him before we came here, but I’d already agreed to go to the wedding with him. And I wanted to see everyone again. One more time. At least until your wedding when I’ll have to see him again. I guess I’ll have to deal with that when it happens.”

“That and when Will and I have kids and other events and things I’ll want you here for. You’ll see a lot of him. Are you prepared to see him with someone else? Maybe even married to someone else?”

Tears rolled freely down Lucy’s face. “No, I’m not prepared for that. But hopefully I will be by the time it happens. It’s what he deserves. He should have someone who can be with him freely.”

“I want you to do something for me.”

Embarrassed by her emotional meltdown, Lucy wiped her face and tried to find her composure. “What?”

“I want you to take this week to really think this through. I’d hate to see you do something you might regret.”

“Of course I’m going to regret it. I already regret it, and it hasn’t even happened yet. But it’s the right thing for me, even if it hurts like hell. It’ll hurt a hell of a lot worse a few months from now when we realize there’s no way we can make this work.”

“I worry you’re underestimating him, Luce. Obviously I don’t know him as well as you do, but I know him pretty well, and he doesn’t seem likely to go quietly.”