Hush: Family Secrets (21 page)

CHAPTER Thrity Two

I stand in the doorway after hanging up with Nate. The man sounds so wounded. It makes me think of my own woman who is royally pissed at me. I have to admit that a part of me feels like an arse for leaving after what we shared tonight. However, hearing the tears in Pamela’s voice and knowing that she really needs me tugged at something in me. The protector in me needed to insure she and the girls are safe.

“How are you holding up, Bella,” I ask from behind Pamela after watching her tears stain her cheeks as she stares out of the window. I am sure she is watching Nathan stand in the rain below.

“Was that him,” Pamela sniffles. I stepped out to take the call from Nathan. I’m sure she put two and two together it is one of the things I admire about Pamela she has a quick mind, which once again reminds me of my wife.

“Yes, he is concerned about his family. I cannot fault him for that,” I say gently.

“I’m sorry about this. I know you have a life of your own,” Pam wipes at her tears. “I just didn’t know where else to go.”

“You did the right thing in calling me. We will get those little beauties to sleep and then we will talk. Although I have a feeling they are fussing because they miss their papa as much as I think their mama does,” I tell her with a lifted brow. I understand her being upset about being lied to.

I warned Nathan but he has done what he felt was best. I am not too sure I blame him. He did what he thought was best to keep her safe. If I could’ve shield Valentina from the truth of the monster within me I would have.

“I’m sure they are missing their bedtime story,” Pam says sadly. I hate seeing her like this. I can see how much she cares for Nathan. This is not like the feelings she had for Luca. This time she is really in love and when she is not upset it looks good on her. I was able to witness their love first hand months ago when I went to the hospital to see her and the girls after they were born. The christening has not happened yet to make me their official God father but I hold my title seriously already. “Uri, I don’t know what I’m doing, but I can’t go back now.”

“One day at a time, Pamela,” I reassure her. In reality I am talking to myself. I went from smoothing things over with Valentina and proposing to her being pissed at me. I won’t lie. There is something else she is holding from me but I was certain I would have all my answers before the night ended. That is until Pamela’s call came in. “We will take it one day at a time. For now you and the girls can have this place.”

“Oh,” Pam gasped. “Uri, I can’t let you do that.”

“You can and you will,” I wave her off. I will not have my family roaming around with nowhere to go, especially not with the state that Pamela is in at the moment.

“Uri, you are one of the kindest men I know. Some woman will be so lucky to have you,” Pam gives me a small smile.

I snort. “You women are too much work,” I chuckle as I think of the hole I will have to dig myself out of tomorrow.

“Oh, well you say that as if you have already found one,” Pam says excitedly. Until this moment I hadn’t realized how much I want Pamela and Valentina to meet. They are two of the most important people in my life. I think they will really hit it off.

“Don’t get too excited. It is even more complicated than your situation with Nate,” I shake my head as I think of all of the drama surrounding my marriage.

I love my wife and wouldn’t change the fact that I married her. I think of the way she came to me in London and smile inside. I had no clue that I would fall so hard for the young woman that drove me crazy. I thought I just craved her body back then but if I am honest with myself I know I fell in love with her from the first time I saw her in that store. I just hadn’t known then that that was what I was feeling.

“Well she must be special to have captured the heart of a man like you. I know for a fact not everyone knows the Uri I know,” Pamela muses with warmth in her voice, pulling me back to the present.

“She knows not this side either,” I say teasingly in a conspiratorial whisper.

I stroll over and pick up a whimpering Tiffany and start to sing to her in Italian. It is a song I remember my mum singing to me when I was little. As I look at the beautiful little girl in my arms I wonder what Valentina and my children will look like. Boy or girl I will love them just the same. I frown to myself as I think about what Valentina told me tonight. If she hasn’t been on her birth control since the incident in London then that was about nine months ago.

I feel a pit in my stomach as I wonder if something is wrong with me. What if I can’t give my wife a child? I have taken so many lives I wouldn’t be surprised if now I am being denied my own family. This will not stand. I will have Rebecca on top of this first thing in the morning.

Valentina has come such a long way and I know she will make a great mama. I kiss the top of Tiffany’s sandy blonde waves. I smile widely as she blinks her big green eyes at me. These girls are gorgeous. I will do my best to get them back in their father’s arms. I would lose my mind if I couldn’t hold my own babies in my arms.

I chuckle with amusement as the little beauty coos up at me as if she can already sing in Italian along with me. While Pamela is right that Valentina is special she is wrong about one thing. I am the lucky one to have Valentina in my life. I will make things right with my wife when I return home. I want a baby.

My lips lift into a smile as that realization slams into me. I look up at Pamela as the little one in my arms quiets down. “I will make you a deal. I am not their Papa but I tell a good story. How about I tell you ladies how I met my wife and then you can tell us how you met their Papa,” I say with a mischievous grin on my lips.

I have never heard how Pamela ended up with Nathaniel
Briggs but knowing her I am sure it is an entertaining story. Pamela’s pretty brown eyes go wide in her pretty face. Her lips part but no words escape at first. I can see the questions in her eyes and the wheels turning in her head.

“Your wife,” she finally gasps out. “We have been friends for how long? How did I not know you had a wife?” Pamela asks with wrinkled brows.

“I did not have a wife during our time in London. Valentina and I have been married for a year now. Things are like I said complicated but if you want to hear about her I have time to share,” deep down I really want to tell my friend all about the love of my life.

“Well I am all ears now,” Pamela smiles.

“Great, well I met her first in a shoe store,” I begin. “You two little ladies will be fond of those when you get older. Your mama loves shoes.” I tease and wink at Pamela as I tell the girls a bedtime story of how I met the love of my life.

CHAPTER Thrity THree

“I am tired of waiting. This should have been done with already. She has been married to that piece of shit for a year now. You have had reason to end this once and for all for an entire year. Why is it so hard to just follow the plan,” she shouts.

I am growing tired of all of this. I am sorry I ever got involved with the crazy bitch. Between Angela and my son I have had enough of this crap. Raphael is going to be the death of me if this woman doesn’t get me killed first.

“I grow tired of this. I cannot just start a war because you say. This takes care and time,” I grumble from behind my desk as I watch this woman closely.

“Don’t tell me about time. I am tired of waiting. I have worked too hard to make this happen. Vincent is screwing up all my plans. I thought I’d be rid of Shannon. He isn’t pushing her into this marriage. He has been doting over the other one since he let her marry the other Donati. You have to do something and soon,” she snaps.

“I don’t think going after Valentina and Uri is wise despite what you and Raphael think,” I say for the millionth time.

“You have to be kidding me,” she growls. “What are you not understanding? I want my husband’s undivided attention, I want what should have been mine from the beginning, I want the Caprisi Empire. Shannon’s marriage promises me both the Donati and Caprisi name but right now that all could crumble and land into Valentina’s lap. I still don’t trust Vincent not to find some way to screw this up. I need his daughter and that British dog put down.”

Her voice is grating on my nerves. When she came to me years ago with talk of taking over the Caprisi family I was young and dumb and all for it. I had even promised it all to Raphael since he was a small boy. That was my mistake as well. The boy has since become obsessed with not only the Caprisi family Empire but with Vincent’s daughter Valentina.

There is something in the girl’s eyes. I believe the rumors that she is a trained killer. Raphael is too stubborn and arrogant to listen to me. That girl is trouble, I saw it years ago. I realized then as well that this arrangement with Angela was a mistake.

“You listen to me,” I hiss. “This is not what I signed up for. Had I any clue that you would go after his wife and innocent daughters I would not have helped you put this mess in motion.”

“Oh please you are just as guilty in all of this as I am. Vincent has never figured it out so why are you hesitating to finish the job now?” This crazy winch spats.

“This is all a waste of my time,” I wave my hand at her dismissively.

“Waste of time? You want to know what is a waste of time? I have spent years with a man that looks right through me. It is as if I don’t exist. I have loved him and done everything I can to help him get over his precious wife. But does he see that? No! He only sees his precious little whores,” she seethes.

I wrinkle my brows and look at her in disbelief. “How can you speak of your own daughter like that? I can see your distaste for Valentina. I’m sure you never meant for her to survive in the first place but Shannon is your own flesh and blood,” I say in disgust.

“If you think that little twit is my daughter you are just as big a fool as my husband. Do you think this all started when I came to you. I have been planning all of this from the time he chose to marry that mutt over me,” she flips her hand at me then flips her hair over her shoulder. “I bet you didn’t even know that his precious Khayla had a sister. They were Irish twins, only ten months apart and looked almost identical. Iman was fairer skinned than Khayla which I hoped would work in my favor, which as you can see it did.

“Vincent was so distraught over his beloved it wasn’t hard to get what I needed. All I had to do was wait until he drank himself into a stupor. The fool actually thought she was Khayla coming back to him. He had no problem fucking her even though he had just married me. Ghost or no ghost he never even stopped to think about his new bride.

“You see Iman was a junkie. Her family had disowned her because of it. I’d held that card close and it came in handy. I made a few promises so long as she stayed clean long enough to have the baby. She knew nothing of her sister’s husband and could care less about the man I was setting up. It was like taking candy from a baby. I pretended to be pregnant and nine months later Iman handed over Shannon and I handed her the high of her life.

“No one would ever find out what I had done. Shannon was mine for the taking and I thought that he would learn to be happy with us. Only he was never happy with me. Shannon he would dote on but me, I have always been the afterthought. He has always picked that mutt over me even after I had her disposed of.”

I have seen and heard many things in my life but the words that have just come out of this woman’s mouth have me stupefied. I knew she was a cold bitch after she hired that maniac Corrade and changed the plans from putting a hit on Vincent to taking out his wife and kid. I lost a lot of sleep over that back then. I would never have agreed to what she had done. The sick bastard took this to a level I wouldn’t dream of having one of my boys go to.

I narrow my eyes at the soulless woman sitting before me. “I am done with this,” I say firmly.

“Are you sure about that? Your son seems pretty invested in all of this,” she says with a smug smile on her ruby red lips.

“You will do well to stay clear of my son. Trust me you would not want any of this information to get back to the wrong people. I can make your life hell,” I growl at Angela Caprisi, a woman I now loath more than what I have allowed her to drag me into, which I didn’t think possible.

“I have lived there already. I don’t fear you trying to take me back,” she says with an evil smile before standing and walking from my study.

My younger greed and stupidity are coming back to visit me. I see it in my dreams. This foolish woman is about to bring chaos to my door.

CHAPTER Thrity Four

I am still fuming this morning as Uri has not returned home as of yet. He text me once to tell me he loves me, but that is not the same. I’m irritated with the situation and with myself. I want to be mad at him but I just miss him.

Now that I know how he feels about starting a family I just want to share our news. I need his support because this…of all things scares the shit out of me. I will willingly walk into a room full of men with one weapon and know that I am the only one coming out alive without an ounce of fear, but a baby.

I have no point of reference for this. Uncle Valentine never gave me any training that could prepare me to be a mother or a wife and I haven’t known a good mother since I was four. I barely remember much other than the trauma from the awful event that changed my life forever.

What if I turn out to be a terrible mother because I have been too good of an assassin? These are things I want to talk to Uri about but he isn’t here. I stab angrily at the cereal in my bowl that I can’t even stomach. This morning is the first time I actually had any morning sickness, as if being ready to admit the truth to Uri has brought it on. 

“So when do you plan to tell my son he is going to be a Papa?” Donatella chirps happily from her stance at the kitchen sink.

I pinch my eyes shut. How did I think this woman hadn’t figured it out? Now that I think about it. She has become like a mother figure to me in the last year. She has been very instrumental in helping me to mature in my relationship with Uri.

I open my eyes and look up at her. She is giving me a warm smile. “I thought I was going to tell him last night,” I frown.

“Ah… and he had to take off to help Pamela,” she says knowingly.

“Exactly,” I say bitterly.

“Now I understand the strain in his voice this morning,” she nods her head.

“You spoke to him,” I ask more forcefully than I meant to.

“Yes, I called him this morning. He told me he needed to give Pamela a little help. You do know that she is no threat at all to you?” Donatella asks warmly.

I scoff. “I want to believe that but he has jumped from our bed twice to help her. What does that say?” I grumble.

“It says that my son takes caring for those he loves very seriously. He would and has done the same for Luca many times. Luca has just been staying out of trouble lately. Uri is a fixer. He fixes things,” she explains gently.

I frown into my bowl as her words sink in. “Okay, say I can accept that. Last night was important,” I pout.

“Yes dear, it was but think of how important his God daughters’ safety is to him. Luca put Pamela through a lot. He wasn’t the greatest man when they were together. I believe the final straw was when he told her about being engaged. It isn’t my place to tell their story but they had been together for seven years. She had no idea he had a future that did not include her.

“I believe my son took to her not only because she is such a sweet girl but out of guilt for the things Luca has done. Uri stepped into be what Luca wasn’t. There bond is a unique one but what he has with you is something totally different. You have captured his heart in a way no one ever thought possible, especially not Uri.

“Rest assure, when he returns you will have his full attention and you will be able to share this wonderful news. You will love Pamela when you meet her,” Donatella makes her way over to the island where I am sitting and pats my hand.

I snort. “If I ever meet her,” I grumble.

She laughs at me and cups my cheek. “He hasn’t introduced the two of you to protect your feelings. He thought it would be awkward for you with your sister engaged to the man that Pamela was once in love with. Everything Uri does has purpose Valentina. Now let’s talk more about this wedding.”

At that her face starts to beam. It sinks in that Uri’s mother knows way more than he thinks. She pays attention to everything. She hasn’t steered me wrong as of yet. I take a calming breath and shift my thoughts to my second wedding.

~B~

I’m exhausted. Helping Pamela with the girls last night and this morning tossed a dose of reality on what being a father will really consist of. Christ, those two girls have a set of lungs on them. I rub my tired eyes as I walk into the kitchen where I can hear my mama and Valentina laughing.

I stop in the threshold to watch them for a moment. I’m thrown back to the first time I saw the two in the same room together. My mum has become so much happier than she used to be. It seems her husband going into hiding has freed her.

My gaze moves to Valentina and I think of how much happier she has become from the stubborn and brash young woman I first met. A smile takes over my lips. She seems to be glowing this afternoon. The look fills my heart with hope.

There is so much I am protecting her from but I would have it no other way. I would fight a world full of demons to keep her happy and safe. I growl inwardly because I am growing tired of leaving loose ends when it comes to her safety.

It is time I let my uncle know his time is running out. I won’t be playing nice too much longer. “Ah, here is my boy,” my mama pulls me from my dark thoughts.

I move into the room, stopping behind Valentina and wrapping my arms around her waist. I release a breath I hadn’t known I was holding when her body sags back against me. I kiss the top of her head and inhale her sweet scent.

“How are you, Love,” I murmur against her neck.

“Fine,” she shrugs her shoulders.

I release a deep breath. “Mama can you give us a minute,” I ask not looking away from the side of Valentina face.

“Sure,” my mum replies tapping Valentina’s hand in support. “Remember what we talked about.”

I look up at my mum at her words, but she just smiles at me and winks. Something in my chest releases and I for the first time in years feel the love that I had lost for my mama. Not the obligatory love of a child for their mum but the love that comes from knowing the genuine love of a mama and returning the same.

When my mum leaves the room I spin Valentina in my arms and look down into her eyes. I see a mix of emotions there and it tugs at my heart that I hurt her. I don’t know how to make her understand this so I start with the best way I know how.

“In our line of business it is hard not to know the name Briggs. You have heard this name, yes?” I start.

“Yes, I’ve trained with Rita and Jasper before,” she replies with furrowed brows.

I press my lips. Of course her uncle would send her to train with the best. The Briggs family may not get into the business of the families but to be a Briggs is to be a Mairettie, one does not separate the two. Not if you are truly connected. You have to have deep ties to understand how the two connect. So I have absolutely no surprise to know she has come so close to the Briggs family.

“Well in that case you know Nathaniel or you have at least heard of him?” I prod.

She shrugs while still frowning. “I never met him, but I know of him,” a devilish smile comes to her lips. “Actually, his reputation could put yours to shame.”

I snort. “Careful little one,” I warn. “I like Nathaniel he is an honorable man. I admire the sacrifices he makes for his family.”

“Okay, but what does this have to do with us?” she arches a brow.

“If you know who Nathan is then you also know that his true identity is just as hidden as yours. Pamela is Nate’s woman. My God daughters are his twins. Pamela has just found out who and what Nathan really is. Can you understand what it would be like for you to just find out the monster that I am,” I pin her with my stare so the truth of my words can sink in.

She chews her lip and sags further into my arms. Looking down she nods her head. “Yeah, I get it. To love us is to love the darkness that comes with us,” she whispers. When her head lifts and her eyes meet mine they are softer and hold understanding. “Are they okay? I mean Pamela and the girls?”

“Yes, I have them in my loft for now. She is hurting as can be understood. Nathan is a good man. Everything he does he does for his family,” I say hoping she understands my words are not just meant for Nathan. I too do everything for those I love.

Her arms go around my neck. “She is lucky to have a friend like you,” she gives me a small smile.

“Funny she said that same thing about you. I think I am the lucky one to have the two of you,” I brush a kiss to her forehead.

“You’re right,” she says with a cheeky grin. “Uri?”

“Yes Baby,” I brush her sweet lips with a brief kiss.

“How come I didn’t know you were a God father,” I feel like a heel when I see the hurt and disappointment in her eyes.

I brush a thumb over her full lips. “It has not been made official as of yet. I did intend to bring you along to the christening,” I sigh. “I still feel awkward about the unresolved relationship Luca and Pamela have, but I will not continue to hurt you by keeping my two families separate. As I said before, when things calm down you and Pamela will meet and you will get to know the girls as well.”

“Thank you,” she says lifting on her toes to kiss me. When she goes to pull away I cup the back of her neck and deepen the kiss, holding her to me.

Fire ignites in my veins as I think about us creating our own little family. I’ve turned thirty nine this year. I find myself wanting things I never knew I wanted. I reach down with my free arm lifting her up onto the kitchen island stepping in between her thighs.

I trail kisses down her neck and retrace my path with my tongue. Just being next to this woman drives me insane. My body becomes tight with just her presence in the room. I loosen the tie on the romper she is wearing causing the front to give enough for my hand to slip in and caress her breast.

Valentina arches into me and winces as she whimpers. I pull away to look at her. My mind swiftly starts to think of her last cycle and the last time her breasts were too sensitive to my touch because of her cycle. My eyes search her face before I stare off into space.

I start to count back and think harder. I usually know when the goods are going to be off limits for a few days. My eyes drop back down to hers as my memory of her last cycle is taking me back too far. Suddenly her words from last night and her behavior over the last few weeks come to mind.

A low slow growl works up my throat and her eyes get wide. “How long have you known?” I rasp thickly.

“Baby, I…”

“How. Long.”

“For sure, only three weeks, but I have suspected for about two month before that,” she says and bites her lip.

“You have been carrying our child for nearly three months and you are just telling me,” I say incredulously.

“Yes, but I didn’t know you would want this,” she says with panic in her eyes.

“When are you going to stop assuming to know what I do and don’t want? You have been wrong every time.” I shake my head at my wife but cutoff her next words as I crush my lips to hers. I gently lift her from the counter and head for our bedroom. Once in our bedroom I place her on the bed and peel her out of her clothes.

Still fully dressed I hover over her taking in the changes that I should never have missed in the first place. I move to her taut belly and place my ear to her stomach. My heart swells when her laugh fills the air and her fingers run through my hair. I squeeze my eyes shut.

“You can’t hear anything yet silly,” she laughs.

I turn my head and press my lips to her still flat belly. “Just indulge a new papa. My son is growing inside you,” I say in awe.

Another laugh bursts from her lips. “Your son?”

I look up to see her lifting a brow at me. “Yes, our son,” I smile up at her.

She beams and places a hand on her stomach. “I will just be happy if she or he is healthy and happy.” A haunted look fills her eyes and I know where her mind has gone.

I climb up her body and lay beside her. “Our child will be healthy and it is my job to ensure you are both happy. You will make such a wonderful mama. To all of our children,” I say pointedly.

She turns her head and looks me in the eyes. The clouds in her beautiful blue eyes recede as she reaches to cup my jaw and run her fingers through my beard the way she always does. “Thank you, honey. I needed to hear that. I’m scared shitless,” she chuckles softly.

“We are a team remember. We do this together. I love you,” I kiss her lips and pull her into my side. This changes everything. “We return to Italy at the end of next month.”

“I figured that was coming,” she sighs. “Raphael sent me a text this afternoon.”

I sit up and look down at her. “Excuse me,” I hiss narrowing my eyes. This motherfucker has just lost his mind. I am one bear he should never poke. “What exactly did the dense bloke text you?”

Valentina frowns, pressing her lips. “
This is not over
,” she rolls her eyes.

“Fucking right it isn’t over,” I growl.

“Uri, I didn’t tell you to upset you. I just thought you should know.”

I point a finger at her. “You go nowhere without Fin. Understood,” I command.