Hunting Shadows (Shadow Series #3) (17 page)

The Henchmen started playing one of their fast songs and the fans went wild. I was
content just to sit back and watch and I felt a warmth run through me when Simon caught
my eye and winked. In that moment, my feelings for Ryan seemed ridiculous and I was
barely aware that he was sitting at the same table as me. My heart belonged to Simon
and that would never change.

They played a
long set and it was late by the time they were done. They were mobbed when
they
came out from backstage and after a while they we
re able to make their way to our
table.

“Amazing
,
as always,” Sarah said as they sat down.

“You were awesome
!” Jenny chimed in.

“And what did you think?” Simon asked as
he sat down next to me and rested
his arm around my chair. I wrinkled my nose.

“Passable, I suppose.” I ruined the effect of my disdain by laughing. “You know you
were great. You don’t need me to tell you that.”

“But it means the most when you say it.”

My heart ached a little at
his words and as I leaned forward to kiss him softly, I resolved to never give him
any reason to doubt my loyalty to him. When I pulled back, his blue eyes were sparkling
and he looked happier than he had in a long time.

We hung out for a
while at the East End and although
I had the most fun that I had in a while, I was also keenly aware that we were all
paired off except Ryan. It didn’t seem to bother him, but I couldn’t forget the words
I had thrown so coldly at him earlier. He had revealed enough of himself to me that
I knew he didn’t relish a lonely life, but he seemed resigned to the fact that it
was his destiny as a seer. He avoided looking at me and I wondered if he had finally
accepted the fact that there would be nothing romantic between us. I hoped so because
it would make it a lot easier to push aside my feelings
for him
.

Chapter Fourteen

The visions came back with a vengeance. The next couple of weeks were filled with
countless visions of death while I slept, but instead of weakening me as they had
done in the past, they strengthened me. Ryan and I settled into a somewhat
comfortable relationship.
We both seemed to want to igno
re what had happened between us and connected simply as seers.
He was inval
uable in helping me recall detail
s in my visions that I would have missed on my own. Simon was still distrustful of
Ryan but he seemed to accept that we needed him to help me get
stronger to defeat my father. Once I realized that
Ryan seemed to accept that nothi
ng would ever happen between us, I was able to relax around him.

With each vision came the tracking and surveillance o
f the potential victims
. I took a
different approach with each
of them since the circumstances were so varied, but the inevitable stand-off was
the same for all of them. I felt a growing sense of pride and confidence as I was
able to destroy each vardoger and I began to learn the exact amount of energy I needed
to channel to destroy them. My control over my powers became more honed and instead
of fearing the encounters, I started to look forward to them.

Ryan w
as always beside me, guiding me
in t
he
se moments but Simon was always
there too. I felt a sense of safety with them around and I began to truly believe
that I could fulfill my calling as a seer.

I couldn’t help wondering what my father was waiting for, why he wasn’t coming for
me, but I decided to not question the gift of time I had been given and resolved to
get as strong as I could.

I told Grant and Sarah minimal details
about everything I was doing
, not wanting to get them too involved, but it was still a burden to keep it a secret
from Jenny and Marcus. I was relieved when winter break rolled around and everyone
went
home. Simon and I had decided to stay in Rochester despite his family being disappointed
that we wouldn’t be coming to Connecticut for Christmas. Simon gave the excuse of
taking a music seminar that Maxwell was offering over the break and fortunately his
parents bought the excuse.

Ryan
stayed
with us as well, and I couldn’t help
but
wonder if he had anyone to call to make excuses to. It made me sad to think that he
didn’t and I was reminded how alike we were in so many ways. I had no family to make
excuses to either.

Christmas was interesting, to s
ay the least. I decided to put on the works and make
a full di
nner on Christmas Eve even though it was just
the three of us. It made me feel a little more normal and both Simon and Ryan seemed
to appreciate
the gesture. An
uneasy truce
had settled between them
and
they
were able to put aside their differences to sit down to a civil dinner.

I woke up from a vision-less sleep on Christmas Day, my spirits lifting when I saw
the sunlight streaming through the window.
I turned around in bed
and saw that Simon’s eyes were already open
.

“How long have you been awake?” I asked softly.

“Just for a few minutes. I wanted to enjoy what little time we have alone.”

“I know Ryan being here
isn’t your idea of an ideal Christmas
. Thanks for putting up with it.”

Simon leaned over and kissed me gently
. “You’re worth that and more.” He deepened the kiss and I pressed against him, reveling
in the feel of his body against mine. He pulled back slightly and gazed at me. “Merry
Christmas,” he whispered.

“Merry Christmas,”
I whispered back and
pulled
him closer so
his lips
were
against mine again.
The slow heat began to burn hotter and I opened my mouth, making a sound o
f satisfaction
when I felt his tongue caressing mine. I pressed against him harder but he broke
the kiss.

“We need to stop
now
, or I’m not going to be able to stop at all,” he said, his breathing heavy.

“I don’t want you to stop.” I was tired of waiting. I didn’t want to wait for the
perfect moment anymore
because I had a feeling it would never come
. It didn’t
really
matter. All that mattered was that Simon and I were together.

His blue eyes darkened in anticipation but he still asked the question. “Are you sure?”
He glanced at the closed bedroom door. “We’re not alone.”

“I don’t care. I want you too much.”

That seemed to melt any hesitation Simon had and he pulled me towards him, kissing
me deeply. There was a new urgency to
our kisses, as if knowing what
they were leading
to
made
us even hotter.

I moaned when he trailed open-mouthed kisses down my neck, bar
ely even noticing when he pushed
up my shirt.

“Lift
your arms up,” he said hoarsely and I obliged, feeling a little nervous when
he pulled off my shirt so that
I was bared to him. My nervousness was forgotten when I felt his mouth on me and I
gasped when he
pulled my hardened nipple into his mouth. I raked my hands through his hair, mewling
when he showed the same attention to my other breast.

Simon was already shirtless and I moved my hands to his back, stroking his muscled
shoulders. I found myself growing impatient, n
eeding to feel as close to him
as possible.

“Easy,” he rasped when I made a move to take off his bottoms. “We should take this
slow since it’s your first time.”

I made a sound of protest. “The last thing I want to do now is go slow. I’ve been
going slow for twenty-one years.”

The grin Simon gave me somehow turned me on even more. It was full of rakish satisfaction
and open lust. “That’s why I want to take this slow and make it worth your while.”

My breath caught in my throat when he pushed my pajama bottoms and panties down. Even
though I knew what he was going to do, that didn’t stop me from gasping in surprise
and then moaning in pleasure when I felt his mouth on me. Time seemed to stand still
as he continued his onslaught and just when I thought I couldn’t take anymore
, he stopped and pulled himself up.

My body felt like it was on fire and I couldn’t stop shifting restlessly
beneath him
. My voice didn’t sound like my own when I spoke. “Simon, please. I can’t wait any
longer.”

I felt lost in his gaze as his eyes
drank me in as if he couldn’t get enough of me. “I love you, Caitlin,” he said, his
voice hushed.
His blue eyes
grew dark
until they almost looked
black. “Don’t forget that.”

“I won’t,” I said, pressing myself against him. I was urgent to become one with him
and the longer he denied me, the needier I felt. I almost sighed in relief when he
shed his bottoms and I heard the crinkle of a foil packet.
He never broke eye contact as he raised himself above me and I opened myself
up
to him.

The pleasure blotted out any twinge of pain there might have been
and soon nothing in the world existed except Simon. He tried to control himself,
the muscle twitching in his jaw telling me how much he was trying to pace himself,
but soon neither of us could deny the driv
ing need and we came together with a fierceness that took my breath away. I never
felt more connected to anyone than the moment when we l
ost ourselves in each other,
the sharp and sweet pl
easure almost too much to take
.

The aftermath was just as beautiful as we lay in each other’s arms, neither of us
wanting to break the connection.

“Are you okay?” Simon asked softly, brushing the hair back from my sweat-dampened
face. I snuggled closer to him feeling content.

“I’m more than okay. I always thought the first time was supposed to suck.”

I felt the rumble of his chest when he laughed. “I guess that’s
a
compliment.”

I kissed him lightly. “It’s definitely a compliment.” I watched as his amusement faded
and he watched me with serious eyes.

“Do you love me?” he asked, as if he actually wasn’t sure of the answer.

“Always,” I whispered. “I’ll always love you.”

The lines of tension on his face relaxed and he pulled me closer. We spent
the next hour in bed just enjoy
ing cuddling
together. Re
ality slowly started to intrude
and I couldn’t help wondering if Ryan had heard anything. I had given no thought
to how loud I was
being since I
was too lost in the moment
. The thought of Ryan hearing us, of hearing
me,
made me cringe and I felt embarrassment start to creep in. It was still early and
I hoped he had slept through the whole thing.

“Do you think he heard?” I asked.

Simon frowned, the contentment on his face vanishing. “Who the hell cares? He’s the
one intruding.”

I sighed but didn’t push the subject, not wanting to ruin the mood. I reluctantly
sat up and grabbed my clothes that had been discar
ded on the floor
, putting them on quickly
. “I need to take a shower.”

I padded down the hallway but walked past the bathroom to take the opportunity to
peak into the living room. Ryan was still sleeping on the couch with his back turned
to me and I breathed a sigh of relief.
It was probably a good thing that he had refused Sarah’s offer to sleep in her bed
while she was gone, since her room was so much closer to mine.

I made my way to the bathroom and took a long, hot shower
while I relived every moment with Simon. I couldn’t stop smiling like a giddy schoolgirl
and wondered if I shoul
d call Sarah to tell her
what had finally happened.

Simon was no longer in the bedroom when
I returned and I dressed quickly, hoping that he hadn’t woken Ryan. Even though I
doubted Ryan had heard anything, I still felt a little embarras
sed and transparent, like I had “just lost my virginity
”
emblazoned across my forehead.

Ryan was awake and the sheets and pillow were neatly folded on the couch when I walked
into the living room. Simon was sitting on the recliner and they both looked up when
I entered the room. I had obviously interrupted their conversation and I was curious
as to what they had been talking about without me. They weren’t known to make idle
chitchat with each other.

“Good morning,” I greeted Ryan. Remembering the holiday, I added, “Merry Christmas.”

“Merry Christmas,” he reciprocated but he didn’t smile at me. I glanced at Simon and
he wasn’t smiling either.

“What are you two talking about?”
I started to notice the growing tension in the room.

“Simon was just telling me that he thinks it’s time for me to leave,” Ryan said, his
voice bland but his eyes were narrowed. “Nothing new, but
he seems to
think you’re on board with the
idea as well.”

I turned to Simon. “What’s this all about?”

“We don’t need him anymore. I can help you just as much as he can to make you stronger.
I’ve been with you every step of the way.”

“You have and I appreciate it, but I still need Ryan. Because of him I’ve been
able to learn how to retain
much more from my visions. And don’t forget that he’s the only one that can warn us
when my father is near.”

Simon
looked far from pleased by my response and his lips thinned. “We don’t need him anymore,”
he insisted. “We don’t even know how accurate he is with tracking vardogers. All we
have is his word.”

I felt my ire start to rise. Just when I thought we had made some progress, Simon’s
stubbornness reared its ugly head again. “Don’t forget abo
ut Marie. She’s the one that le
d us to him in the first place, and she seemed pretty convinced of his powers.” I
made a sound of frustration. “I don’t want to argue about this again, Simon. Not today.”

I turned around abrupt
ly
and stalked into the kitchen. I had planned to make pancakes for Christmas breakfast
but that cheery thought was squashed
as I leaned against the
counter. I wasn’t surpris
ed when Simon followed me into the kitchen.