Hopelessly Imperfect (Imperfect #1) (5 page)

We’d crossed a small parking lot when I heard guys shouting. Farah’s eyes cut to me. She was wide-eyed as we stepped inside the alley where the commotion was coming from. We both froze for a moment. A full-on fight was going on. A large crowd had congregated around it, and people were screaming at both opponents.

I swallowed hard and glanced at Farah. She looked as panicked as me. I saw some guys from our school, but I wasn’t friends with them.
No surprise there.
However, the place was completely crowded. There were a lot of people I didn’t know and had never seen in my life. They didn’t look nice, either.

Swallowing hard, I placed my hand on Farah’s arm. “I think we should leave.”

Her usually easygoing demeanor was slowly fading away. Hesitantly, she nodded. Before we turned around to run back to school, a boy spoke from behind us. “Hi, beautiful! You made it!”

Farah’s eyes sparkled as I turned around to find the same guy that had walked into calculus with Nathan. Relief washed over me as he approached us. He had soft, brownish waves of hair and was sporting a warm smile. However, my eyes widened as they zoomed in on his white t-shirt. It was smudged with dirt and a few bloodstains. I looked quizzically at Farah, whose panic had clearly evaporated as she gazed at him dreamily. I rolled my eyes at that.

He stepped closer and kissed her on the cheek like a fight wasn’t going on right behind us. “I’m Chris, by the way.” He raised his hand like he wanted to bump fists with me. I just blinked at him. His green eyes sparkled in amusement as I didn’t move an inch. Farah beamed at him and was speechless for a change. Despite the dirty t-shirt, he was cute and also well-built. Even though he was being friendly now, he had the whole bad-boy attitude going on, which had me concerned for Farah.

“And you’re Cassandra.” I frowned at him. How did he know me?

Farah looked between us. “You know each other?” Her voice contained a hint of jealousy.

“No,” I stressed at the same time he said, “kind of.”

I eyed him quizzically. He shrugged and added nonchalantly, “We take calculus together, and we appear to have a friend in common, don’t we?” His eyes twinkled knowingly. Before I could answer, he grabbed Farah’s hand and my shoulder. “Come on, you’ll get to see our friend in action!”

My brows furrowed in bewilderment as he pushed people to the side and brought us to the front of the circle. He passed an arm around Farah’s waist as I frowned at him. He was being too friendly for someone who just met her.

Farah smiled at me reassuringly before someone shouted, “For this round, we have Rivers against Thompson!”

My eyes widened as I found myself staring at Nathan’s gray eyes once again. They were stormy, clouded with rage and pain at the same time. But not physical pain. The kind of heartbreaking ache that makes you feel guilty and distraught at the same time. Curiosity and concern spiked inside me as my stomach clenched uneasily. However, the pain faded as his eyes locked on mine. Anger darkened his face.

Someone doesn’t look happy to see me here.

His eyes traveled to Chris and narrowed. Chris wasn’t really paying attention to Nathan. Instead, he was whispering to Farah, who was giggling like a little girl.

Nathan’s opponent walked inside the circle. He was really skinny, and for a moment, I feared for him. Glowering, Nathan walked to stand in front of him. The guy launched himself at Nathan, and I winced for the Thompson dude. I was no expert in fighting, but he didn’t seem to stand a chance.

On cue, Nathan blocked the guy’s fist with his arm and punched him in the stomach.

“Don’t hit him so hard,” I heard myself scream at Nathan as the guy bent over, obviously in pain from the punch.

Nathan gazed at me incredulously as the boy stood up. I shrugged apologetically at him. Thompson stood in front of Nathan, but Nathan was still glowering at me and didn’t notice that the skinny boy was getting ready to punch him again.

Crap. He’ll hit Nathan this time.

A wide smile tugged up my lips.
Take that, Nathan.

An emotion I couldn’t describe flashed through his face just as he got punched in it. I couldn’t help myself and cracked up.

He didn’t see it coming, and the force of the blow made him lose his balance and land on his butt. He got up, shaking his head, a small smile on his face. Our eyes locked for a moment just as the school bell rang in the distance. Everyone scattered in a hurry. Nathan shook hands with the skinny guy, who was grinning like he was the happiest man on earth.

A moment later, Nathan reached us and slapped Chris hard on the back. Chris didn’t seem to mind, though. He was smirking at Nathan. An ugly bruise was starting to form on Nathan’s eye. It was already swelling and turning purple. I felt a pang of guilt for distracting him and laughing about what happened to him as well.

He was walking next to me, still smiling. “I’m sorry,” I blurted out, embarrassed, and winced as he turned to me. His eye looked even more swollen. It had to hurt too.

Nathan stopped to open the school’s back door for me. He smirked at me as his good eye wandered to my face. “It was worth it.”

Huh?

Quizzically, I frowned at his words before we trotted back to school, Farah and Chris right behind us.

Before we parted ways in the hallway, he stopped in front of me. A breathtaking smile played on his face as he said, “I’d take that punch again just to see you smile like that once more.” My heart started to race as he leaned closer and whispered by my ear, “You should do it more often, Taylor.” Then he walked away as I stared after him completely dumbfounded. Again.

Chapter Five

I was still thinking about Nathan’s words a couple of days later, when Dad invited Marie over to our house.

She arrived with beef stew and a bowl of rice. My dad made us some salad and bought some chocolates and went all-out when setting the dining room table, taking out the fancy china and getting some flowers to put in the middle of the table.

I helped him in silence, feeling extremely awkward.

I liked Marie. I really did. Then again, she wasn’t only my mom’s best friend, she was also like an aunt to me. Seeing my father act like this,
for her
, well…it was plain weird.

Nonetheless, dinner was absolutely delicious. Especially since we’d been eating takeout for the last month or so. Eating home-cooked food at last felt cozy and homey.

Marie was really attentive too. She tried to make light conversation with me by asking about school and stuff. However, an awkward feeling nagged at the back of my mind.

What the hell is she doing here?
Why is she smiling so much at my father?

Why is he smiling back?

Under any other circumstances, those questions would probably make me sound like a crazy, egocentric teenager who was probably imagining things. It just felt strange to have another woman sitting at the table with us only a few months after Mom passed away.

Kind of replacing her.

I couldn’t bear to think that. I missed her. I could never replace her, not even with Marie. And Dad, didn’t he love Mom? Didn’t he stay with her until her last breath? Didn’t he miss her?

You’re one to talk.

My stomach felt heavier and more uneasy as her visit wore on.
Maybe I was imagining things. Still, I stayed silent during most of dinner and asked to be excused just as we finished eating.

After tossing and turning for most of the night, I grabbed my cell phone and read the time. It was almost past four. Sleep seemed like a luxury nowadays. I passed a hand across my face, completely frustrated with myself and pretty much everyone else.

Since I wasn’t going to go back to sleep, I decided to go out for a run. I wasn’t very athletic, but I needed to do
something
, and running seemed like a good choice.

A part of me wanted to draw. I used to love drawing, but I wasn’t ready to get back into it. I felt like I couldn’t enjoy myself. I simply didn’t have the right to.

Not after everything I did.

The cold air nipped my skin as I started to jog. It was still dark, and you could see little twinkling lights over the horizon. A small smile played on my lips as my breathing hitched from the exercise. Prickles started to tease my legs, but I ignored them. I jogged toward Riverbend Park to enjoy the view of the river. I stopped for a moment to catch my breath as I leaned against a tree. The sun was starting to rise, and I just couldn’t stop picturing Nathan’s breathtaking smile. One side of his lips tugged higher than the other, making it unique. I rolled my eyes, but a small grin tugged at my lips as I recalled the moment he got punched.

Nathan was a mystery.
An intriguing, unnerving, alluring mystery.

He seemed to have some sort of stalker tendencies since he appeared out of nowhere pretty much everywhere I went. Strangely, I didn’t mind. I actually liked it. Not that I would ever admit that to anyone.

Apparently, I hadn’t been paying much attention to anything around me these last two years as I walked around in the bubble I’d created for myself. It was a fragile bubble, though. So fragile, it would break from time to time. Like when I was drunk. It happened once and my whole world collapsed. I didn’t like to think about it.

I shook my head; Tom had saved me that one time, and he’d never spoken about it after. I had kissed him and totally come on to him, but he didn’t take advantage of me. And I think I ended up crying and mumbling something about Mom. So when he kissed me again, a few days later, I kissed him back. The memories from that night were blurry. That’s how we started to be friends with benefits, sort of. I felt like I owed it to him. Plus, it was fun at the time.

However, I didn’t know Marissa had feelings for him. Tom and I had that weird sort-of relationship for over four months, and Marissa never said anything.

I sighed.

I was pretty much oblivious to everyone around me. She had the right to hate me.

The sun was shining brightly as I started to jog back to my house. I’d never fancied running, but I liked it this time. I enjoyed how I could just get lost in the movement of my legs. I was doing this again tomorrow, for sure.

Dad was still asleep when I got back. I made coffee and jogged upstairs to take a shower. I had enjoyed wearing a sleeveless sports shirt to run, and I cringed at the thought of wearing another long-sleeved blouse. I just didn’t want people to know about my scars.
But it’s so damn hot.

Sighing, I grabbed a short-sleeved black shirt and decided to be careful. I found some bracelets and decided to put them on both wrists to camouflage the scars.

As I trotted downstairs, I heard Dad in the kitchen. He was setting out cereal bowls as I walked in. He stared at me for a moment and smiled, relieved. “I thought I heard you leave before dawn,” he said as he poured the whole-grain cereal into my bowl.

“Yeah, I couldn’t sleep and decided to go out for a run.” I poured the milk in both bowls as he watched me dumbfounded. Lifting my shoulders in a noncommittal shrug, I took a seat at the stool and grabbed a spoon. “Apparently, I like running. I’m going to try it again tomorrow.”

“Dr. Simmons recommended that you exercise,” he mumbled to himself as he started to eat.
Yeah.
I did feel better.
Maybe the old man did know what he was talking about.

“Dad? I have to see Amanda, Dr. Pierce, but I’m not sure I want to talk to yet another therapist at school.”

He nodded. “I’ll call your school today.” He smiled at me as his blue eyes twinkled with emotion. “You look better, honey.” After a pause he added, “Did you enjoy having Marie over for dinner last night?”

My stomach churned uneasily as I played with the food in my bowl. “Yeah, I guess,” I trailed off, unsure. I kept my eyes on the cereal even when I felt Dad’s gaze on me.

“I think we should do it again, don’t you?” he asked tentatively.

Suddenly, I wasn’t hungry anymore; even though I had only eaten half of the cereal. I stood up to wash my bowl in silence. I liked her, but I didn’t like her getting into our lives like this.

How selfish can you be, Cassandra?

My heart felt tight.
Dad looks happy, though.
He had been smiling and making jokes during dinner, something I hadn’t seen him do in years.

I just miss Mom.

“I’m going to brush my teeth, and I think I have time to walk to school.”

Sadness flashed through his eyes as he nodded. It killed me to see him like that. Especially after seeing him smiling last night. My stomach clenched and I swallowed hard as I stood by the kitchen door. Gazing at my shoes and rubbing my scar, I murmured, “You don’t have to ask me. You can invite her whenever.”

“Did you know your mom asked both of us to be together if she wasn’t here anymore?”

His words felt like a punch to my stomach. I looked up at him as my eyes brimmed with tears. My heart started to race, and I had to swallow the lump forming in my throat. Dad watched me, assessing my reaction. I stayed silent as I worried my lip
.

I did remember.

Mom had told us she wanted Marie and Dad to be together right after she found out she had cancer. Marie had been divorced for the last eight years. She didn’t have children, and so far, she hadn’t found anyone to be with.

I got it. I knew Mom didn’t want my father to end up alone.

It’s just too soon, isn’t it?

Still, what right did I have to say anything about it?

I kept quiet as I trotted to my room to get ready for the day.

The walk to school was pleasant since I wasn’t wearing so many layers of clothes now. I had let my hair down, and by the time I reached the school, it had almost dried. The large school building appeared before me as I absentmindedly moved my feet, still thinking about what my father had said.

I didn’t want to think much about it, though.

Swallowing hard, I crossed the parking lot. It was still early, and there weren’t many cars around. Only a group of girls talking at the bottom of the stairs, and a couple of guys goofing around with a soccer ball.

My hair had curled into small waves, and I tried to flatten it with my hands as I stepped inside the main hallway. Strangely, I wasn’t surprised to see Nathan leaning on my locker waiting for me. I had successfully avoided him over the last few days since our math teacher had been sick. Every time I thought of him, his intense eyes and the comment about my smile brought back the feeling of butterflies fluttering in my stomach.

Then again, they guy was persistent. I hated to admit this, but he looked good in those dark blue, ripped jeans and gray shirt. It somehow enhanced the color of his eyes. I was glad to notice the bruise on his left eye was almost imperceptible. It was still a bit swollen, but not as much as the day he got punched.

My steps faltered as I approached him, but I straightened up and stepped in front of him. “Do you mind?” I raised an eyebrow, peeved.

His lips tugged up in a crooked smile. “Don’t you ever greet people?”

My heart started to race at that stupidly good-looking smile, and I retaliated with a sickly-sweet smile. “Hi, Nate!”

He chuckled and moved aside so I could open my locker. “You look nice, by the way.” He grabbed a strand of my hair with his right hand. My heart was beating a mile a minute as my cheeks warmed. I tried to ignore it as I worried my lip and took out my English book. The strand of hair slipped out of his hand.

Oh, thank God.

When I turned around, he was passing a hand through his hair. Which made me feel envious of his whole just-out-of-bed hairstyle. Boys will always have it easier than girls.

“Listen, about the other day,” he drawled as my heart started to race even faster, since I couldn’t stop thinking about it myself. His eyes were serious. The distinctive sound of students chatting and milling around filled the hallway. His voice was steady as he said, “You can’t go out there again, not even with your friend or Chris.” It sounded like an order.
What the hell?

“Excuse me?” I raised an eyebrow, not liking the tone of his voice.

He sighed and brushed his tongue over his lips before determination set in his eyes. “Half the guys out there are in gangs.” He hitched his backpack strap higher on his shoulder. “It’s not a safe place for a girl like you.”

“A girl like me?” Defiance laced my tone.

“Yes. A girl like you.” He set his jaw as he straightened up and looked at me boldly.

I closed my locker door with more force than necessary, making some of the students nearby look our way. “You can’t tell me where I can or can’t go.”

A lopsided smile played on his lips.

I ignored the way my heart skipped at the sight of it.

Taking a step closer, he added, “If I see you there, I’m going to pick you up and drop your cute little ass back at the school grounds.”

My breath caught in my throat at his proximity and the blazing intensity of his eyes.

“You’ve been warned, Taylor,” he said in a tone that meant we were done with this conversation before walking away.

My blood boiled.
How dare he forbid me to do anything? And what does he means by “a girl like me”?

The bell rang, and I stomped toward English class. Farah was already in her seat doodling in her notebook. She eyed me quizzically. “What happened?”

Rolling my eyes, I dropped my backpack on the floor. “Nathan is an idiot.”

Farah’s lips twitched as she tried to suppress a smile. “Nathan? The same Nathan who got punched for you?” She crossed her arms across her chest. “The one who’s a total
nobody
?” She raised an eyebrow, and the smile she had previously tried to suppress was now a smirk.

Pressing my lips together for a moment, I slumped in my seat. “The one and only,” I muttered annoyed, before pinching the bridge of my nose.

“
Huh.
” Farah’s smirk was now more pronounced. “You never told me how you two met or that there’s something going on between you.”

Taking a deep breath, I started to take out my notebook and black pen. “There’s nothing going on.”

“Why are you so angry at him now?” she pushed.

“I’m not. He’s no one. I don’t care what he says. I can go wherever I want, and he can deal with it.” I crossed my arms as I finished setting everything on my desk. I looked up at my friend, who raised an eyebrow with that annoying grin still on her face. “It’s not important,” I muttered.