“Wait,” Mattias said harshly.
I froze. “What?” Had I done something wrong? Or maybe he’d changed his mind now that he’d seen me mostly naked. Talk about making a woman self-conscious. “What’s wrong?” I asked, since he didn’t immediately answer.
“Sorry. Nothing’s wrong.” He pumped himself a few more times. “I just…I just wondered. Are you ready? Wet? You’ve been taking care of me, but I’ve hardly touched you at all.”
Wet didn’t even begin to cover it. As long as he wasn’t having second thoughts, I decided to finish lowering my panties. Once they hit my ankles, I stepped out and toed them aside before crossing back to him.
“I’m more than ready,” I said as I sat on the edge of the bed again. “But I won’t try to stop you from touching me in any way you want to.”
He reached for me as soon as I was close enough, tugging me down beside him. Leaning over me, he traced a finger from my collarbone to my hip, letting it whisper over my flesh. My already taut nipple juddered as he tweaked it on his meandering journey south. However much I wanted him inside me, I couldn’t complain. Turnabout was only fair, and I had taken my time and then some in teasing him to a frenzy.
I brought my knee up in invitation and anticipation, dropping my head back onto my pillow. Gradually, he edged his exploration down, lower, lower, closer to where I wanted him to be. Mattias touched the inside of my thigh and pressed it toward the bed, opening me for him to discover what he would.
With only the tip of a single finger, he outlined my lower lips. “Very wet,” he murmured.
“I told you.” My entire body was trembling, not from cold but from need.
One finger slipped inside me, then another, and I arched my back in bliss.
“I can’t wait much longer,” he said.
“I can’t, either.”
He pumped his fingers inside me a few times, my hips rising to meet him of their own volition. The heel of his palm brushed against my clit, and I let out a moan.
“Yes,
sötnos
,” he said. “You’re going to come for me, Paige. But I want it to be while I’m inside you.”
I wanted that, too. More than I could say. I nodded, moaning as he removed his fingers from my channel and repositioned himself. Mattias raised himself over me again, placing his cock at my entrance. He rocked his hips a few times, only sliding an inch or two inside me at first. But then I wrapped my legs around his waist and put my hands on his shoulders, and he drove all the way home, nearly splitting me in two.
I bit down on my lower lip to keep from crying out, but I couldn’t stop myself from tensing at the sting of his entrance.
“Am I hurting you?”
I shook my head, trying to buy myself another moment before answering. “It’s just been so long,” I finally forced out. “Give me a minute and I’ll be fine.”
He held himself still, resting his forehead against mine, and kissed me tenderly. “I don’t want you just be fine.”
The sting eased to a dull ache as my sex stretched to accommodate him. I rolled my hips to let him know I was ready. He groaned, but then he started to move within me, gentle thrusts at first that gradually increased in speed and intensity. He lifted his weight off me, staring down into my eyes as we moved together, a slick glide that felt as natural as breathing and as exhilarating as skydiving.
My body tensed as I approached orgasm. I slipped a hand between our bodies to rub my clitoris. A few more thrusts and I splintered, shuddering and burying my head in Mattias’s shoulder.
He shifted our positions, lifting my legs and spreading them wider, which somehow allowed him to drive even deeper into me. Then he collapsed against me, his cock jerking inside me as he came. “
Det känns som om jag är hemma, sötnos
,” he said next to my ear.
We lay there with our limbs tangled, too done in to move despite our sweaty bodies starting to stick to one another, until our breathing returned to normal and our pulses slowed to a mere gallop. I relished the weight of him pushing me down into the mattress, the heady scent of his cologne mixing with the musk of our efforts.
I didn’t want it to end.
And it wasn’t just because I didn’t know when the next time I would have an opportunity like this might be. I had to be honest with myself. Yes, I’d asked Mattias to come in, and I’d decided to take him to my bed
initially
because I’d wanted to indulge myself. But that was far from the whole truth of what was behind it.
I was falling for Mattias—hard—and even though I still had a thousand reasons not to humor the selfish idea of getting into a relationship, it appeared to be too late for that. Now I just had to figure out what to do about it.
He rolled off me after a long while, and I immediately felt the loss of him. I turned on my side, following him so I could rest my head on his shoulder. He trailed his fingers through my hair, an action that felt both familiar and right.
“Mattias?” I asked after a few moments.
“Hmm?”
“Tell me what you said.”
He looked down at me with a question in his eyes.
“The Swedish a minute ago.”
He thought for a moment. But then he said, “It was just heat-of-the-moment nonsense. Something like
I feel like I’m home, sweetie
.”
Something warm and pure bubbled up in my heart. “I don’t think that’s nonsense at all.”
MY INTENTION WASN’T
to spend the night—I would never have been so presumptuous—so I hadn’t come prepared for that. After Paige and I got up, showered, dressed, and had breakfast, I had to go back to my place for clean clothes and the like before practice. I promised her that as soon as I could, I’d be back to pick her up and we could continue with our weekend together.
When I left—following a few lingering kisses—I told her to rest up and dress comfortably. The comfortable part of that was an absolute necessity because of what I had planned. We were going hiking in the Columbia River Gorge. I’d been out to Multnomah Falls a few times since I’d been in Portland, and they seemed like the perfect place for an active date. Lucky for me, the weather had cooperated today. It was cool but not too cold, considering it was February, and the sun was shining.
It was 501’s first full-contact practice with the team following his concussion, and I pushed him hard. I
always
pushed 501 hard, actually. He reminded me a lot of myself when I’d been his age. He had all the potential to be one of the best defensemen in the world, but he was still making a lot of rookie mistakes, even though it was his second year in the league. He seemed to go back and forth between sitting back and trying too hard, though, so he wasn’t getting the kind of ice time he and I both knew he was capable of handling. I’d already decided that for the rest of this season and likely all of the next, he was going to be my special project. I was determined to get every ounce of effort I could squeeze out of him. He might not like it while it was going on, but he would thank me for it down the road. After practice was over, I sent him off to see Doc for another evaluation before he was cleared to play in our next game.
Then, for the first time in my career as a coach, I took off early. Webs and Handy were perfectly capable of handling all the game prep that needed to be done. Jim was always telling me I needed to take some time for myself so I wouldn’t burn out, and I never took him up on it. Today? I planned to take full advantage of that.
When Paige answered the door, she was blushing and shoving her phone into the pocket of her jeans.
“Zoe checking up on you and Beefy?” I asked.
“You think I’d tell you that?” She winked, grabbed a rain jacket and her purse, and locked the door.
We spent the drive talking about my plans for helping Sophie learn to skate. Drywall had already drawn up a blueprint of sorts for the first rig he intended to build, and now that we were due to be home for a long stretch, he thought he could get at least an initial attempt put together within the next week or so.
There weren’t too many cars in the parking lot when we reached the lodge at Multnomah Falls, which meant we shouldn’t be overrun on our hike.
“Ready?” I asked as we climbed out of my SUV.
Paige slung the strap of her purse across her body and reached for my hand with a smile filled with trepidation. “So I guess I never mentioned my fear of heights, did I?”
I shook my head, lacing my fingers with hers. “I’ll keep you safe.”
Her fear didn’t stop her from hiking up the trail with me. We completely bypassed the primary viewing area. That was where most of the small crowd would be, so getting out on the hiking paths would give us more privacy.
When we reached the Benson Bridge, I slowed down, not wanting to assume anything. “You up for it?” The bridge spanned the space between two halves of a ridge and looked down over the lower cascade.
She gripped my hand tighter but nodded.
We made our way to the center of the footbridge and stopped, turning toward the gushing water. A chilly spray hit our faces, and Paige nestled herself in front of me, taking both my arms and wrapping them around her waist. She was shaking, but I wasn’t sure if it was fear or cold behind it.
“You’re not scared?”
“I’m fine as long as I only look up, not down.”
“Do your girls know you’re scared of heights?” I asked.
“They know. It’s too hard to hide it when they want to go on roller coasters and sky trams and God only knows what else.”
“So what would they think if they could see you now?”
She waited a moment but then laughed. “They’d think you’d brainwashed me.”
I took my cell phone out of my pocket and nudged her to turn so we were facing the other direction. “I think we need to send them a selfie so they can see you facing your fears.”
“Oh, please don’t make me look that way,” she said, stiffening.
“Look up, not down. I’ve got you.” I tightened my other arm around her, drawing her closer to me.
She waited a beat, but then she nodded resolutely.
I got us in position and held my phone out so it would catch us, the falls in the background, and at least a bit of the bridge. “Are you smiling?”
“I’m squeezing my eyes closed.”
I laughed. “That’s not what you want them to see, is it?”
“Maybe not, but it’s as good as I can do.”
There was something else she could do that I was sure would work much better. I put a finger under her chin and tilted her head up toward me, and I kissed her. When I broke it off, she said, “Oh,” and blinked up at me a few times. That was when I snapped the shot.
“Give me Zoe’s phone number, and I’ll let her see how kissy-faced you’re getting with Beefy.”
“Only if you swear not to mention Beefy at all.”
I pecked her on the lips again. “Done.” Right now, I would promise her almost anything. I put the number in as she rattled off the digits and hit Send.
“There aren’t many people in the world I’d do that for, you know,” Paige said.
I spun her around in my arms so I could see her eyes. “Do what?”
“Get up here. Face my fears. You bring things out of me that I didn’t know were there.”
She and her girls did the same for me. Well, not exactly. I knew this side of me existed, thanks to Linnea. But until Paige and her family had come into my life, no one but Linnea could bring out that side of me, and I’d been happy to keep it that way.
I kissed her on the forehead and took her hand. “Should we keep going up, or are you ready to go down?”
“Up,” she said at the same moment as my phone dinged with a reply.
Mom and Beefy, sitting in a tree. K I S S I N G.
And then my phone went crazy with more replies.
OMG. Beefy.
No. B E R G Y. Not Beefy.
I am so sorry.
I hate my phone. Stupid autocorrect.
I’m going to go crawl under a rock now. Please forget I ever existed. Tell Mom I love her.
I burst out laughing so hard and so loud it echoed through the valley.