Back to You

Chapter 1

Sitting on my bed, Brady sat next to me
playing Xbox; I knew this was a bad investment. He hardly ever pays
attention to me, almost like I don’t exist while he sits there
blowing shit up. Sigh. I start chewing my bottom lip, looking at
the ceiling bored.

“
Stop that Abby.” He says
without looking at me.

“
Stop what?” I ask him
even though I know exactly what he means. He doesn’t have to look
at me to know that I’m annoyed. He just knows.

I’m sure it has to do with the noises I make
that I’m not aware of which gives away my annoyance. He’s learned
over the years how to read me like a book. He knows everything
about me. We’ve been together since the end of our freshman year. A
choir geek and a football player. Yeah, totally weird mix. But hey
it works for us.

“
I know you’re annoyed
that I’m playing games instead of hanging out with you.” I don’t
deny or confirm but he knows the answer so he continues.

“
Let me have some game
time, and then you will have my full undivided attention. I
promise.” Yeah right. I get up and make my way to the door,
stopping midway to look at him. He’s still engrossed in his game.
But then he pauses it and looks at me, “I promise.” Whatever, I’m
outta here.

I make my way into the kitchen where my
sister Sarah is sitting at the table eating cereal, honey nut
cheerios to be exact. It makes me hungry.

“
Hey Abs.” she greets me
with a smile on her beautiful angelic face.

“
Hey you.” I kiss her on
the head and sit down next to her. She’s 15 but acts older, a lot
older.

“
So, Brady ignoring you
again?” Pretty much.

“
He just wants to play
some Xbox for a little bit.” I walk over to the fridge and take out
a yogurt, remembering how hungry I am.

“
You know, you deserve
better Abby. Brady is such a douche bag. He doesn’t care about you
like you think he does.” I stare at my sister in shock. She’s never
voiced her opinion about him before. And she’s certainly never said
the word “douche” either. At least not in front of me.

“
Wow, Sarah that’s
subtle.” She turns her whole body toward me and takes me hands in
hers. I’m officially taken aback by this sudden need to protect me.
She’s never played the protective sister role before. That’s my
job.

“
Abby, I’m serious. You
have a dream and as long as you stay with him, you’ll never
accomplish it. Brady is like poison. Get rid of him, or you will
never be fully happy in life.” In a way, she’s right, being with
him is like quicksand and if I don’t get out now, I never will. But
still, I can’t just dump him. We’ve been together too long. I do
love him. I’ve never thought about what the future could hold for
us or me. I’m not even sure he knows what he wants to do. Brady
hasn’t really supported me on my singing dream or even a dream of
moving away and exploring other options. He thinks singing is lame
and that I would end up a druggie and drunk like the rest of the
musicians and singers that make it big. I’m not like the others
though. But what if he’s right? What if it does happen to me? Maybe
it’s something they can’t control, like when they step into stardom
and feel the pressures of being the best or something. I know I
dream just about every night of being on that stage, millions of
people cheering me on and it feels so empowering. I can deal with
pressures. I push all negative thoughts aside; it’s too much to
think about right now.

“
Hey, what are you two
gossiping about?” Brady’s voice cuts through my jumbled
thoughts.

“
Well, well I guess you
finally got bored of playing Xbox long enough to play with my
sister eh?” I stiffen at that response. Wow, it seems she really
does despise Brady. He just stares at her in shock.

“
Anyway, we were just
gossiping about the usual, you know…who’s dating who. Who’s dumping
who?” Sarah eyes me as she says the last part as a hint. I get
it.

“
So you ready Abs?” I give
him a puzzled look. Ready? For what I wonder.

“
Uh, I guess. Where are we
going?”

“
Oh I thought I’d take you
to get some food.”

“
I ate a
yogurt.”

“
Okay, then how about we
go to my house?” I’m only half listening because my mind is
elsewhere. We have things to discuss.

“
We need to talk. Let’s go
to the park or something.” I say grabbing my light sweater off the
chair. Sarah is looking at me curiously. She’s probably wondering
if I’m going break up with him. I’m wondering the same thing to be
honest. I kiss her on the cheek.

“
If I’m not back before
mom gets home, tell her I’ll be home for dinner.” Then I walk out
to my car with Brady on my heels.

“
Why does your sister
always look at me like she hates me?” Brady asks as we get into the
car.

“
If you must know, it’s
because she does.” I reply. I may as well be straight with him. I’m
not the sugar coating beat around the bush type of girl. And that’s
what Brady loves about me. I’m just not sure he’ll feel the same
after he hears what I have to say. I’m suddenly feeling very
nervous. I love Brady and don’t want to end things. But I also
don’t want to be in a dead end type relationship where he is the
dictator of my life. I control my life. We get to our destination
and I park the car. I turn to look at him, his eyes everywhere but
mine.

“
So what’s this about
Abby?” He asks hesitantly.

“
Look at me Brady.” He
does and just as I’m about to speak he reaches over and grabs my
face in his hands, kissing me with full force. It’s a forceful but
sloppy kiss. It doesn’t taste too good, yet it still screams hungry
and desperate. I try to pull back but his grasp is tight. I part my
lips just the slightest and in goes his tongue feeling around for
mine. Finally I relax and go with it. The talk can wait. We get
more into it; I hear moaning noises and open my eyes. He is
definitely enjoying it more than I am. His hand creeps up my thigh
exposing my bare skin. He reaches under my dress and caresses my
stomach. It feels so good; I don’t want him to stop. My hands
explore his chest and further south. What am I doing? I need to
stop this before it goes too far. But my mind is not working
properly. Damn. I came here to talk about our future, not have sex
in my car in the parking lot of a child’s sanctuary. His hands move
farther north now. Shit! What was I supposed to do again? I
chastise myself for being so weak. He slips his hand into the front
of my panties. Whoa, okay no more.

“
Stop.” I push his hands
away and try to catch my ragged breathing. He sits up and puts his
hands in his lap.

“
Look I came here to talk
to you.” My adrenaline is pumping. I take a deep breath and
start.

“
Okay, I need to know
something, the truth actually.” He nods for me to continue. He is
still trying to catch his breath. I smile at the thought of leaving
him breathless. Then I turn serious again.

“
You know I love you
Brady. But I need to know, do you love me enough to support
anything I want to do in life?” I am suddenly afraid of his answer
and look down at my poor manicure job, afraid to meet his
gaze.

“
Of course. Whatever you
want to do, I will back you one hundred percent. I love you Abs.” I
look up and meet his eyes. His brown eyes bore into my blue ones. A
smile lights my eyes.

“
Really? Even if I want to
sing? Or do something that you find lame?”

“
Look, if you want to sing
I will support it. I still think its lame but I will support it if
it makes you happy.” I am overjoyed by his response and wrap my
arms around him in an embrace. Maybe Sarah was wrong about him
after all, she is pretty judgmental.

“
So, do we get to do it
now?” He asks me. I slap his shoulder in an affectionate manner and
open the car door. I feel like swinging.

“
Where are you going?” He
asks running after me. I run faster but not for long. He outruns
me, but of course he’s a player at that. He tries to catch me but I
psyche him out and run the opposite direction to throw him off.
Eventually he grabs me and we both fall to the ground laughing,
dirt all over our clothes and in our hair. Being with him just
feels right.

I get back just before dinner after driving
Brady home. It smells delicious the minute I open the front door. I
walk into the kitchen and find my mother is setting the table.

“
Well hello darling. Glad
you could join us. Is Brady eating dinner with us?” My mother asks
with a hint of hope in her eyes. She’s always liked Brady. I
believe it’s due to a commonality they both share, in that, she
also thinks my dream of singing is a bit ridiculous. I think it has
to do with my aunt being in the show biz for years and she was into
drugs and went down a dark road. She too is worried I will head
down a similar path. She believes she sees more for my
future.

“
No. I dropped him off at
home to eat dinner with his family.” A flicker of disappointment
flashes across her face. I ignore it and help her set the
table.

“
Oh thank God butt face, I
mean Brady is gone.” Sarah strolls into the kitchen.

“
Excuse me, that’s enough
Sarah. No need to be so rude. He is your sister’s boyfriend.” My
mother comes to my defense even though I wasn’t offended. I know
Sarah doesn’t like him. I feel like I was stuck in the
middle.

We sit down to eat Chicken Alfredo, Caesar
salad and garlic bread. My stomach growls loudly and I cover it up
with a loud cough. It is obvious but no one says anything. Feeling
relieved, I dig in.

“So how was school Sarah? Getting into
trouble still or have you learned your lesson?” My mother asks
Sarah out of curiosity. She does get into trouble a lot being that
she is so opinionated and not afraid to speak her mind.

“
Mr. Shelby was a dick
today. He sent me to the office because I was caught passing notes
to Haley. It’s so stupid. We weren’t really doing anything wrong.”
Sarah replies nonchalantly, as if getting sent to the office is a
normal everyday occurrence. For her it pretty much is. My mother
gives her a look of disgust.

“
Sarah Ann, this has got
to stop. Why can’t you behave for once? If you don’t straighten up,
I will send you to a private school. I can’t deal with this
anymore.” She is angry now, but I also see a flicker of sadness in
her eyes. I could see dinner taking a very bad direction. I really
do want to get away from here. Maybe a college out of state would
be good for me.

Ever since my father left, my home front has
been a nightmare. I give Sarah a death glare. She challenges me
with one of her own. Neither of us willing to back down, I break
away first.

“
I’ve lost my appetite.
I’m going upstairs to do my homework Excuse me.” I get up to rinse
off my dishes and head up to my room. I slam the door behind me and
lie on my bed.

Beep Beep Beep

My phone still in my backpack on the floor
starts going off. I go to retrieve it and open it anticipating a
text from Brady.

“
Hey sweet cheeks, wanna
come over for a movie and popcorn?”
It’s
not Brady, but my best friend since middle school
Brooke.

“
Nah, I can’t. Family
issues. Ugh. Sorry, maybe later this week.”
I text her back, just wanting to be left alone.

“
Oh I’m sorry girl. Sure
we will plan something. See ya tomorrow
.”
I read her last text and close my phone. I lie on my back closing
my eyes for a second before a knock on my door startles
me.