Home Ice (34 page)

Chapter Twenty-Four

1,000 Pieces

Izzy’s timing couldn’t have been worse. She was going away with Pierce to a Real Estate Convention in Las Vegas. For four days. She felt like crap about leaving Ally so soon after Gram’s passing, but she couldn’t glue herself to Ally’s side forever. Luckily, Izzy had come up with the brilliant idea of having Ally stay at her condo for a change of scenery. Now, she just had to convince Ally of her plan.

“He wants to help me get my broker’s license,” Izzy chatted on about the testing process and study material and how Pierce fully supported her and her real estate goals.

“That’s good,” Ally told her, only half listening. She was careful not to mention anything about her fight with Ben.

“You don’t understand.” Ally obviously wasn’t matching Izzy’s level of excitement. “No man has ever given two shits about my career. All they’ve ever cared about is whether or not I’m good in bed.”

“Right. Because you’ve never mixed business with pleasure.” Ally’s sarcasm whizzed by Izzy like an arrow.

“I’ve never slept with someone for business.”

Ally narrowed her eyes at her.

“Okay. Once. He was a news anchor looking at a French style chateau and the commission was crazy huge.
Any
way,” Izzy shook her head, “that’s not the point.”

“What’s the point?”

“The point is that I really like him and he feels the same way about me.”

“I’m happy for you.”

“Right. I can see how overjoyed you are.
Anyway
, we’re going to a real estate convention together this weekend in Las Vegas.”

“That’s nice.” Ally turned on the TV and flipped through the channels for something to drown out Izzy’s voice.

“I need a favor of you.”

“What could you possibly need from me, Izzy?” she asked, growing annoyed by the conversation.

“Do you think you could house-sit for me? There’s been a rash of burglaries in the complex and I’d feel better knowing that someone was watching the place.”

In all reality, Izzy made up the robbery story as a rouse to get Ally out of the house. The depressing little house where Gram had passed away. The house where Ally had practically barricaded herself in. Izzy didn’t think it was a good idea for her to stay cooped up twenty-four-seven. And that was all Ally had been doing for the past few weeks. Staying in and pining over her losses. One by one.

Ally shrugged and settled on a
Family Guy
rerun. “I guess I could leave Gram’s house for the weekend.”

“Oh, no!” Izzy smacked her palm to her forehead. “I didn’t think about you having to leave the house with no surveillance.”

“That’s okay. What are they going to steal here? Jigsaw puzzles? It’s not like I have a house full of priceless artifacts and jewels or something.”

Izzy ignored Ally’s acrid comment. She found herself doing that a lot lately. Ignoring certain things Ally said. Ally had grown snotty and bitter about things. A lot of things.

* * *

Ally went in to her room to pack a bag for her stay at Izzy’s and was confronted with the tousled sheets on her bed. The room smelled of their sex and she ripped the sheets from the bed like a madwoman. She stuffed them into the washing machine and tried to hold back the tears.

After stomping back into her room, she packed a bag for Izzy’s with mostly flannel pajama bottoms and baggy sweatshirts. She planned on locking herself in Izzy’s condo and forgetting about the world outside. Nobody, certainly herself included, cared about what she looked like anymore. She felt invisible. And that’s how she planned on staying.

She lugged her bag into the living room and set it by the door.

Before leaving, she went into the kitchen to make sure everything was unplugged and that the stove was turned off. At the kitchen table, she paused. The latest puzzle that she and Gram had completed together stared back at her. Overcome by emotions of abandonment, devastation and grief, she grabbed the puzzle and threw it to the floor. Colorful pieces ripped apart and scattered in all different directions. Pieces of sky skidded across the linoleum and clumps from the edge plopped onto a nearby chair.

The strewn pieces were symbolic of Ally’s current life. Scattered and ruined. Guilt immediately flooded through her when she realized what she did. She had destroyed something that she and Gram had put together. Choking on her own tears, she ran to the door, grabbed her bag and locked the door behind her.

* * *

“All right, sweetie. The car will be here any minute. Are you sure you’re going to be okay by yourself. Should I have Marcus come by to check on you?” Izzy was genuinely concerned, but Ally laughed out loud.

“You send that fruitcake anywhere near me and I’ll slap him upside the face.”

“Okay then,” Izzy ignored the comment and continued, “I already gave you the key to the mailbox.”

“Check.”

“And there are no plants you have to worry about watering because they’re all fake.”

“Fake plants. Check.”

“And I left money on the counter for food because there’s none in the house because I usually order in.”

“Money. No food. Check.”

“I think that’s everything then.”

Ally chimed in with sarcasm, “No wild parties. And my curfew is at ten. And
no boys allowed
.”

Izzy ignored Ally’s mocking tone. “I’ll be back on Monday, sweetie.”

Four days from now.

This was going to be good for Ally. A few days of peace and quiet. A time to reflect and regroup. Four days of television and take-out. The perfect remedy for a grieving and busted heart. Four days. That left the rest of today, which was Friday, and all day Saturday. All day Sunday. And then Monday.

Maybe this wasn’t such a good idea.

“I love you,” Izzy hugged Ally goodbye.

“Love you, too. Have fun with your Sugar Daddy!”

Izzy straightened her burgundy cashmere sweater and smoothed her slacks. Ally should have been able to give
some
credit to Pierce. Ever since Izzy had met him, she started dressing like the young professional she really was. Instead of that
other
kind of professional.

Izzy lugged her Louis Vuitton suitcases out the door and Ally shut it behind her, turned and leaned up against it.

“Four days,” she said out loud to no one in particular.

Ally wandered around Izzy’s condo before deciding to do what she did best. Watch TV. She turned on the television and sat down on Izzy’s modern sofa with a stainless steel base. When she couldn’t find anything good on, she shuffled through Izzy’s stack of magazines. Jeez, it was like a doctor’s office. Izzy had subscriptions to every woman’s magazine imaginable.
Elle
,
Vogue
,
Marie Claire
,
Glamour
, and of course, Izzy’s bible of choice,
Cosmopolitan
. Ally dismissed the magazines and put her feet up on the forged metal coffee table. She hugged a stone-grey pillow to her body, switched over to the UNHL network and watched the sports anchors discuss recent team player acquirements.

Ally spent the next three days lying in front of Izzy’s perfect plasma television watching talk shows and eating leftover pizza. Ally developed the habit of watching ESPN highlights, eagerly waiting for any coverage of Ben. Just seeing his picture on the screen brought her comfort. There was buzz and excitement in the sports world about his return to Denver and the start of training camp.

At first, doing nothing was a welcome change compared to her busy life in the past. Ally was so used to barely having any free time to herself that she indulged in the lazy existence. But soon, depression gripped her and she wallowed around in her own grief and didn’t bother to change out of her pjs the rest of the weekend.

No one’s going to see me anyways, so why bother?

Weather permitting, Ally spent her mornings on Izzy’s balcony overlooking the river. She found comfort in Izzy’s contemporary chaise lounge covered in an earthy mushroom colored micro fiber. She had gotten in the habit of taking her mug of tea outside and staying on the patio until mid-afternoon.

Sunday morning, Ally made herself some tea and took it out to the patio along with one of Izzy’s
Cosmo
s. She settled into the chaise lounge and flipped through the magazine and came to a relationship quiz. “Are you a good girlfriend?” it read. Ally groaned and tossed the magazine on the ground. She looked out at the river. It wound lazily through the oak trees at its banks. Izzy had a fantastic view from her condo and Ally wondered why she hadn’t paid much attention to it before now.

After another day of couch potato Olympics, it felt good to get some fresh air on the terrace at night. The moon was full and bathed the night in light, turning everything midnight blue. The little man in the moon looked down at her. With judgment. She hadn’t washed her hair in days and she could tell he was looking down at her greasy roots in disgust.

On Ally’s last day, the weather changed suddenly in late afternoon. Dark clouds loomed in the distance, their bottoms heavy with rain. They moved slowly towards the north and sprinkled droplets in their path. Ally grabbed her coffee mug and went back into the house before the rain started. She went inside just in time, because the deck quickly filled in with polka dots of rain drops.

The sky turned gray and rain poured down for the rest of the day. The thirsty earth drank in the moisture and the rest flooded down the street. A group of snow geese flew overhead honking with each flap of their white wings. The trees drooped from the weight of the drops and the rain gutters clattered. As each droplet fell to the ground, the sound was melodic. It was a time to wash away the stagnant heat and dust of summer. Renewal in the form of a summer shower.

As the storm worsened, the river swelled with the downpour of rain and began to rage against the bank. The wind was wild as it flicked rain at the windows and banged at the house like it was trying to get inside. The trees swayed back and forth, frantically waving their branches. The sun tried to peek through making it look dark and light at the same time.

The phone rang in between gusts and Ally let the machine, which sat atop its hardwood home on the veneer console table, pick up.

“Uh, hey Izzy, it’s Ben.”

Ben
.

Tears flooded down Ally’s face when she heard his voice. It sounded so close like he was calling from down the hall. But she knew he wasn’t. He was light years away.

Ben’s voice continued through her tears. “I’ve been trying to get a hold of Ally but no one’s answering at the house and her cell is turned off. I just wanted to make sure she’s okay.”

No, Ben, I’m not okay. I’m all alone here and it hurts so badly. How am I supposed to live without Gram? And you.

“Have her give me a call at my new number. Thanks.”

With a click and a whir of the machine, he was gone.

I miss you Ben. I’m here.

The answering machine light blinked like a beacon of hope that Ally couldn’t grab on to.

Escaping the flashing answering machine, Ally shuffled down the hall and into Izzy’s modern minimalist bedroom. The furniture was streamlined and modern. It was ironic. Everything was perfect and in it’s place. The complete opposite of how Ally felt on the inside.

Feeling a chill, Ally searched through her bag for something long sleeve. Like an idiot, she had thrown clothes into a bag without paying attention to what she was packing. A flash of red fabric stuck out from under the gray hooded sweatshirt she was looking for.

Red jersey fabric.

Folded in between two sweatshirts was the jersey Izzy had bought her. She dug  it out and looked at the Red Valley Razor logo. She turned it over and ran her hand over the writing.

Price. 20.

Knowing it probably wasn’t a good idea, but doing it anyway, she pulled the jersey over her head. A funny thing happened. She felt a little bit better. If she couldn’t be physically close to him tonight, then she would wear his number on her back.

She went to Izzy’s maple dresser with satin graphite finish and turned on the stereo, hoping to drown out the sound of her grief and the angry sound of the storm outside. The radio was tuned to the local soft rock station and the song playing was sappy and melodic. Ally squeezed her eyes tight and the tears ran down her face.

She looked over at the platform bed and decided it would make a good hibernation destination. Why couldn’t she have been born a bear? Months of hibernation were a part of their lifestyle. That sounded doable. Definitely a perk for having to live out in the wilderness.

Ally peeled back the 1,000 thread count sheets and climbed inside. She leaned back on the upholstered headboard before sliding down under the covers and into the darkness.

She slept fitfully, dreaming nonstop throughout the night. She had horrible dreams about Gram suffering and she also dreamt that Ben and Izzy were on a deserted island together laughing at her while she floundered on a life raft unable to reach them.