Holy Water (43 page)

“
What do you think?
”
a woman asks from behind.

He turns. It
’
s Madison Ellison.
“
Howdy, neighbor.
”

“
How do you like our work?
”

“
What is it for, AARP Galado?
”

“
Clearly the lowest point in a career that seems to be reaching new depths by the day.
”

“
Who is the old bastard?
”
Henry asks.

Madison Ellison steps forward and puts a finger to her lips.
“
Shhhhh
.
”
She looks around to see if anyone heard him. She mouths,
“
It
’
s the king.
”

“
Get out. I thought he was—
”

She takes his arm and walks him away from the set.
“
Almost,
”
she whispers, stopping beside a cart filled with props: bow and arrows, a cricket wicket, a saddle.
“
He
’
s barely alive, which is why we
’
re doing this.
”

“
I don
’
t follow.
”

She takes a deep breath before explaining.
“
With the . . . political situation being what it is, and the rising opposition to the prince claiming that he has been trying to kill the king, and rumors of the king
’
s death abounding, the prince thought it best that we release some recent photos that show him vital and active.
”

“
Enter Madison Ellison, PR queen.
”

“
I don
’
t want to piss him off. My home office says that if things deteriorate much more, they
’
ll get me out of here in a week or so.
”

“
I understand there
’
s a blue screen involved, and they
’
re
unretouched
,
”
Henry says.
“
But with all due apologies to Mister Rodrigo Spatz, those are some of the most disturbing photographs I
’
ve ever seen.
”

“
And you weren
’
t even here when he dropped the baby.
”

“
No.
”

She nods.
“
Well, you can
’
t really blame Rodrigo,
”
Madison Ellison replies.
“
Since he is a filmmaker by training, not a photographer, and he was kidnapped and everything.
”

“
Excuse me?
”

She takes a sip of what appears to be tea in a paper cup.
“
Kidnapped. About two years ago he was visiting from Nepal and apparently did some unauthorized filming. The prince had him arrested. Because his previous film had been highly critical of the government in Nepal, no one there fought on behalf of his release. In fact, some back in Kathmandu threatened to execute him if he returned. After a while the prince, who is, as you know, a huge movie fan, struck up a relationship with him, which is why, even though he is still officially being held against his will, he is recognized as the official filmmaker to the Crown, with no less than three
biopics
based on the prince
’
s life in various stages of production.
”

Henry turns and looks at the set. The crew is breaking down the pseudo-meadow props and rigging a tennis net across the stage. Rodrigo Spatz and the prince are overseeing the proceedings.

“
The prince
’
s idea,
”
Madison Ellison says.
“
They
’
re afraid we might lose the king, literally, if he does too much. So he chose tennis over hiking for the final setup.
”

“
What
’
s with the film camera?
”

“
Oh. You know. Viral videos. State TV.
”

From a screened-off area behind the stage four people emerge, followed by a nurse pushing the king in a wheelchair. An IV tube is stuck into the king
’
s right forearm and connected on the other end to a hanging drip bag on wheels. He
’
s wearing tennis whites and sneakers and appears to be asleep.

“
I have a question,
”
Henry says.

“
Shoot.
”

“
If the purpose of this exercise is to let the people know that the king is far from dead—is indeed an extreme-sports-playing freak of nature—and if ninety-nine percent of the country has no television sets and the Internet for the most part is banned in Galado, how will anyone even know of the existence of these images?
”

Madison Ellison stands beside Henry and watches two aides rouse the king and lift him to his feet. A photographer
’
s assistant places a professional-quality, oversized Head titanium tennis racket into his right hand and a neon green Penn #3 tennis ball in his left. They reel out an extra ten feet of IV tubing to keep the drip stand out of frame. The king looks down at the objects and weighs them in his trembling hands as if they are artifacts from another universe.

“
This is an excellent point, Henry Tuhoe. Very astute. And if by some chance you choose to share this with your royal friend, I will hunt you down and hang you from the highest prayer flag.
”

~ * ~

An assistant hands Rodrigo Spatz a camera, and he manages to squeeze off a half-dozen shots before the racket slips free and crashes the first time. The second time is when an aide briefly manages to raise the racket high above the king
’
s head, giving him the appearance of preparing to serve a ball to, say, the Grim Reaper, or the late Althea Gibson, only to have the IV hookup tear free, causing ball, racket, and HRH the king of Galado to come tumbling down.

Without missing a beat, Rodrigo Spatz turns to the prince, nods, and says,
“
I think we nailed it.
”

~ * ~

“
Ms. Ellison.
”

“
Your Highness.
”

“
I see you
’
ve already met Mister Tuhoe.
”

Henry steps forward.
“
We
’
re, uh, neighbors.
”

“
That
’
s right. I forgot you left your suite at the spa.
”

“
I did. I thought that moving to USAVille might set a precedent for other, um, corporate visitors.
”

The prince looks Henry over, and for a moment Henry is sure that the prince knows he is bullshitting. But if he does, he doesn
’
t show it.
“
That
’
s an admirable gesture. I only hope it
’
s not too late.
”

Madison Ellison puts her hands together in front of her chest and leans forward.
“
I was just telling Mister Tuhoe about the Shangri-La Summit next week.
”

Henry widens his eyes at her as she continues. Shangri-La Summit?

“
I think having a Happy Mountain Springs contingent at the summit and the hospitality—the river cruise after-party would be a real asset, especially, you know, if Mister ... if Henry could be a sort of spokesperson for how the, um, process works when executed properly.
”

The prince turns to see what Henry thinks of Madison Ellison
’
s proposal. Over the prince
’
s shoulder Henry can see two men trying to reinsert the king
’
s IV drip while the king sits slumped and semiconscious in his wheelchair.

“
I
’
d be happy to attend,
”
he answers.
“
In fact, the founders of Happy Mountain Springs are coming next week to celebrate our initiative. Perhaps they can attend as well.
”

~ * ~

Sitting back in the lounge he waited in earlier, sipping a mango protein
smoothie
and watching the prince play
Wii
Boxing against a digital opponent.

“
I had such grand plans for this country,
”
the prince explains to Henry while throwing punches with the controller like a drummer.
“
Not just industrial plans, but artistic and social. Did anyone show you the giant hares?
”

“
No. Not that I know of.
”

A right uppercut hits the prince
’
s avatar,
Wii
King, knocking him to the animated canvas. He rises on six and continues to talk.
“
To deal with our food shortages, we have been treating ordinary
hares
with massive doses of steroids and hormones and in some instances have grown hares the size of a ten-year-old child.
”

“
Wow. Amazing, Your Highness.
”

“
My scientists also tell me they are on the verge of finding a use for the poisons and toxins in our rivers—a way to turn something so prevalent into a valuable natural resource.
”

Now the
Wii
King lands a knockdown punch. Henry sees one of the prince
’
s handlers motioning to someone near the game console and—surprise—his opponent does not get back off the canvas.

As the prince begins an elaborate, in-your-face victory dance, Henry decides that this is a good time to tell him about his proposal for Happy Mountain Springs to help provide fresh water for rural villages with water shortages and pollution problems. When the dance ends and he has the prince
’
s full attention, he folds the Happy Mountain Springs sustainability story into a version of Madison Ellison
’
s larger story of how they can serve as an example for the way other companies can ride the momentum of the larger global sustainability movement to balance profit and goodwill in Galado.

When Henry is finished, the prince reboots the boxing game and gets ready for another match. Henry sits back, unsure if any of it sank in, and waits through three more rigged bouts until the prince says, without taking his eyes off the game,
“
What would you like from me, then?
”

Henry decides to go for it.
“
Ideally, we could orchestrate things so that we could have a royal presence at our little ceremony before we go to the summit. And then, if it is to your liking, something akin to a royal endorsement.
”

“
That sounds terrific, Henry Tuhoe. Whatever I can do to help.
”

Finally the prince puts down the controller, takes a sip of his
smoothie
, and squints at Henry. The gaggle of aides fidget on the other side of the door. Henry can see their shadows bouncing off the outer walls, and he can only imagine what horrors they have to report from outside the palace gates.
“
What you saw with my father today is not something I am proud of, but it was necessary. He was, in his time, extremely popular with our people. I have tried to lead as he would, to be loved as he was loved, but there was never a connection with me the way it was between my father and his people.
”