Hollywood & Vine (30 page)

Anger stirred deep inside her
―
anger at herself and anger at him. They were idiots for trying to have a relationship, but she was angriest with herself because she knew better. When her phone rang again, she snapped. She wasn’t going to sit and wallow in the dark like some pathetic loser. She deserved answers.

Pushing off the couch, she changed into jeans and a top. She texted Madison and promised to call later, then scrolled to Anders’ last text.

Answer the goddamn phone or I’m coming over.

She shook her head in disbelief and grabbed her keys.

Don’t bother. I’m on my way to you.

Anxiously, Anders looked out his front window for the hundredth time. Aubrey and Clarence had tried to reach him after he took off from the studio, but it was in their best interests he not return their calls. The moment Owen texted a smart-ass comment about mixing business with pleasure, he knew something was wrong. It took less than ten minutes to figure out what. When he saw the pictures, his stomach bottomed out and rage pumped through his veins.

Anders had flown down the hall to Josie’s department, but the lights were off. It was obvious she had left. She always texted before she left. It was all the proof he needed. She’d seen the pictures. He wanted to go straight to her house, but the group of paparazzi waiting outside the studio gates kept him from doing so.

The longer Josie ignored him, however, the less he cared about being caught. She didn’t get to run and hide. The pictures looked scandalous, but Josie should know better than to jump to conclusions. He cursed himself for not telling her what had happened at Aubrey’s, but there was nothing he could about that now.

He sucked in a deep breath when she pulled into the drive. His shoulders stiffened and his jaw tightened as he watched her. She was pissed, and they were about to have yet another fight. For once, he didn’t like his chances of winning. He opened the door and stepped to the side as she passed without a word. They stared at each other silently in the foyer. Anders waited for her to go into the living room, but when he realized she wasn’t budging, his anger at the situation broke free.

“Why haven’t you answered your fucking phone?” It wasn’t how he’d meant to start their conversation, but his defenses were on high alert, and his brain wasn’t communicating with his mouth.

Josie’s mouth dropped open. “Maybe because I didn’t want to talk to you! Ever think of that? Or are you so full of yourself that you can’t imagine anyone not falling all over themselves when you call? Sorry to disappoint you, but I’m not Aubrey.”

“Ivy, those pictures are not what you think. I swear.”

“Of course they’re not. Since we’ve met none of the pictures have been in context, according to you. Or have you been feeding me bullshit at every turn?”

“You know that’s not true. You’re pissed, but don’t fucking regress, Ivy. It makes you look stupid. And you’re not stupid.”

“Aren’t I? I’ve fallen for your bullshit time and time again, but I’m not doing it anymore.”

Anders took three long strides and gripped her biceps. “Would you listen to me? It’s not what you think!”

Josie jerked away. She laid her palms flat on his chest and shoved him back. “Really? Who were you performing for then? Who was the show for? It wasn’t for the paparazzi because they weren’t supposed to be there! You had no idea someone was watching. Yet there you are, basically fucking on her front step.” Her face twisted into a sneer and she shook her head. “Or am I supposed to believe you were practicing for a scene?”

“She kissed
me
! She asked me to walk her to her door, and I figured it would be easier than arguing with her. Someone must have snuck in the gate behind us. When I pushed her away, she started asking all these questions. She was suspicious. So yes, I said some things that I shouldn’t have. But I wanted her to back off. I swear to God, I didn’t sleep with her.”

Josie knew Aubrey was all over Anders every chance she got and it was possible he was telling the truth. However, she also knew she needed to take a step back. She needed to take a long, hard look her relationship with Anders. And she needed to talk to Madison.

“I think we should take a break.”

Anders narrowed his eyes, and his lips thinned into a hard line. “No. We don’t need a fucking break. We need to talk.”

Josie disagreed. “There’s nothing left to say. You told me what happened, now I need time to deal with that.”

“They’re just pictures. What do you need to think about? Either you believe me or you don’t.”

“Don’t you get it? It’s not about believing you. It’s about being able to live like this. I don’t…I don’t know if I can.” Tears shimmered before rolling down her cheeks as she reached for her keys. She slipped his house key off the ring and walked to the front door.

“What are you doing?” Anders’ voice dropped when his eyes zeroed in on the key Josie set on the table.

“I just…just in case.” She didn’t have to spell it out. He understood.

“Ivy.” He whispered her name like a plea and a warning. He stepped toward her, but she shook her head and moved to the door.

“I need some time. Give me that, please?” Josie didn’t hesitate a second more than necessary when he nodded stiffly, his face a blank mask. When she looked in the rear view mirror as she pulled through the gates, he was nowhere to be seen. For the first time, she wasn’t bombarded with conflicting emotions. All she felt was relief.

A
nders walked to the table by the front door and picked up the key. A hollow feeling carved out a place in his chest as the cool metal pressed into his palm. She wanted a break. He’d never been in a relationship before that felt over and in limbo at the same time. For him it had always been cut and dry. Either it was over, or it wasn’t.

His life was spinning out of control. When he first pursued Josie, his only goal was to sleep with her again, but somewhere along the way something changed and he didn’t know how to deal with it. Feelings he’d written off, parts of himself he’d sworn to never let see the light of day again were fighting their way to the surface.

He tried to convince himself he was okay, but when he walked into his bedroom and saw Josie’s shirt thrown across the bed, he knew that was nothing but a lie. Since the day she crashed back into his life, she had more control than he ever wanted to acknowledge. And as much as he hated to admit it
―
as much as he wanted to tell her to go to hell
―
he wanted her to come back.

Falling onto his bed, he grabbed her shirt and covered his face. He breathed deeply and let his eyes fall shut. She asked for a break. She just needed time. If he was being honest, so did he. They couldn’t keep going like they were. But the part of him that trusted before
―
had welcomed his childhood best friend back into his life with open arms
―
balked. That part of him had been doused in kerosene and set on fire, burned in every possible way.

Josie did something to him no woman had ever done before. She pushed all his buttons, and she made his temper flare with no effort, but she also settled something inside him. She soothed the same fire she ignited. She was the balm to her own burn. He wondered how many scars he’d bear when the smoke cleared.

The weekend passed quietly. He picked up his phone a dozen times to call her, but no matter how much he wanted to talk to her, pride and self-preservation were powerful deterrents. He wanted to reassure her he didn’t want Aubrey, but his fear of rejection kept him silent.

For two days he drowned in memories of the past, held hostage by his thoughts. When he walked into the studio Monday morning, his expression was nothing but hard lines and angry scowls. He was impossible to work with. The few people who had any insight into his personal life, people like Madison, could certainly guess why.

Madison watched warily as Anders stomped around the set. He snapped at anyone who dared to correct something he’d done. With a shake of her head, she left to find Josie, praying she was in a better mood than Anders.

“Hey, you. Whatcha working on?”

Josie jumped in surprise, a smile breaking across her face when she saw Madison. “I’m just making a few changes to the designs we worked on last week. Craig made a few suggestions, so I’m making the edits before I send them back to him.”

Madison hummed and pulled a chair over to Josie’s cubicle. “So is this how we’re going to play? You’re gonna make me ask?”

Josie sighed and ran her hand through her hair. “No, I’m not. I just… Can we talk about it after work? I can’t get into it here. Please?”

Madison nodded. “Okay. I’m going to check out a few buildings with Holden tonight and tomorrow after work. How about a girls’ night later this week? We can go out or stay in. It’s up to you.”

“Come to my house Wednesday. I’ll order sushi. You bring sake. I’ll tell you everything then. Maybe you can help me make some sense out of this mess because, Maddie, I’m at a loss. And”
―
she paused and blinked back the tears stinging her eyes
―
“and it…it hurts.” She sucked in a deep breath and wiped under her eyes. “Is this what it feels like?”

Madison’s eyes glazed with tears and her throat tightened. “What do you mean ‘it’?”

Josie lowered her eyes and tried to force out the words trapped in her throat, begging to be swallowed up and buried deep inside. With a shuddering breath her words floated through the air on a whispered breath. “To love someone and have them hurt your heart.”

“Josie,” Madison exhaled, unable to hold back the tears brimming in her eyes. “Are you in love with him?”

Josie looked at her hands. “I don’t know, but something in my chest aches. I’ve never felt this way before. If this is what love feels like, I don’t want any part of it.”

“Don’t think about it right now, okay? Everything happens for a reason, right?” Even though Madison wanted to believe what she was saying, there was a nagging feeling reminding her that sometimes bad things happened with no explanation at all.

While Josie and Madison pushed aside their personal lives and focused on work, Aubrey watched Anders’ every move. Had she any doubt about the possibility of Anders’ involvement with someone, it disappeared the moment he stepped on set today. She’d been right. Jealousy, however, tempered her satisfaction with the rift she had caused. Anders had someone in his life he was keeping a secret, someone he cared about.

“Rough day?” she asked, her face a mask of indifferent innocence.

“Fuck off.” Anders kept his eyes on Dean, who took a hard blow to the chest and fell onto his back. For once he wished he didn’t have a stunt double. Then he could be the one getting punched in the gut. He couldn’t imagine it hurt any more than what he was feeling already.

“You don’t always need to be so hateful.” The tears stinging Aubrey’s eyes weren’t just for show and the tremble of her chin couldn’t be controlled. “I’m not the enemy here.”

Anders turned to Aubrey when her voice broke. With a shrug and an insincere apology, he brushed her off. “You’re not my ally either.”

“I could be. I could be a lot of things if you’d just let me in.”

Anders’ lips thinned into a hard line, and he pulled in a deep, calming breath through his nose. “I think your involvement in my life has caused enough problems.”

Aubrey’s eyes widened. “Anders, if you’re seeing someone and our relationship is causing a problem, just tell me. I can talk to her. I’m sure I can make her understand.” The words burned like acid as they fell from her lips. She only wanted to make one thing understood: no one had a chance in hell against her.

“Your constant inquiries into whether I’m seeing someone are getting a little old. How many times do I have to tell you I’m not dating anyone?”

Aubrey shook her head. “Then how am I complicating your life? It’s not like you’ve changed your lifestyle since I came into the picture.”

Anders laughed. “Since we decided to do this fake relationship bullshit, I’ve had paps waiting for me outside the studio almost every day. They’ve started following me again. I haven’t had to deal with that shit in a long time. Not since I started letting the world see everything I did so nothing about me is a mystery. But now, this thing with you, people are intrigued.”

“That’s what’s caused you to be in such a bad mood? More publicity? That doesn’t make sense. You’ve never shied away from the camera.”

Anders gritted his teeth. When he spoke, the tone of his voice was all the warning Aubrey needed to realize she’d pushed too far. “Because it’s on my terms. I’m in control. I choose how they see me. But having people sneak around and break into neighborhoods? I didn’t choose that.” With a fleeting glance, Anders left the set without another word.

That night, much like the weekend, Anders thought about picking up his phone a dozen times. However, this time it wasn’t Josie he wanted to call. It was Owen. No matter how much of a playboy he was, Owen was a good friend to Anders.

Of course, calling Owen would lead to going out for drinks, which would lead to women for Owen and one very pissed off woman for Anders. Josie said she needed time—a break, not a breakup. Being photographed with a fan straddling his lap again would no doubt be the last straw.