Hold Me Close (14 page)

“If you’ll follow me, I’ll take you to him.” The woman started to walk away and Bonnie shuffled in her heels to keep up with her. “Would you care for a tour of our facility?”

“I’d love to see everything you offer here. I work at a club back home and I’m curious to see how they compare. But I should probably check in with Master Dex first.”

“Of course. I completely understand. If your Master is willing to part with your company for a short while, I’d love to show you around. We’re quite proud of our facility.”

Bonnie smiled. “Of course. As you should be. From what I’ve seen so far, it’s amazing.”

“Thank you. Here we are. The whip room.” The gorgeous blonde motioned to a door on her right and stopped. “I believe Master Dex is in the middle of a scene with one of our guests, but I don’t see a private placard posted so it’s safe for us to go on in.”

Bonnie’s heart skipped a beat at the words Dex was in the middle of a scene. She had no idea why that surprised her since that’s what he did back in Purgatory, but her chest ached anyway. Despite everything she knew about him, she still wanted him to be hers. Hell, even one night all to herself would have been nice. She shared him with every submissive in Purgatory, but here on Eden too?
 

The woman opened the door and they both slipped in. The lights were even lower in here. But spotlights were on all the active stations and in the corner she immediately spotted a shirtless Dex flinging a whip at a woman shackled to the wall in front of him. Next to her, a second woman was attached to another wall apparatus with marks from the whip already visible on her flushed skin. As if two weren’t enough, a third submissive was kneeling in an oversized birdcage, totally absorbed in the scene in front of her.
 

“It looks like Master Dex still has a line. It's been like that all night. When a man as skilled as him is in residence, wielding a whip, it tends to draw a crowd.”

“I can see that.” She tried to bite back her sarcasm, but the sharp look from the blonde told her she had failed.

“Are you all right?”

“Yes,” Bonnie said. She wasn’t but the fact that her heart was breaking was none of this woman’s business.
 

“If there’s nothing else I can get you, I’ll leave you alone. Whenever you’re ready, come find me and I’ll take you on that tour.”

“Thank you,” she said through gritted teeth. Watching Dex whip this woman set her on edge. She wanted to scream. As usual, his form appeared sensuous and daring. The muscles in his back flexed and twisted as he moved and she stood transfixed by every move.
 

Is this how he looked when he’d taken a belt to her ass? Her memories were pretty vivid, but how cool would it be to watch him like this with her? With minimal thought, Bonnie found her hand roaming across her bare backside over the tender welts he’d left behind.
 

The submissive in front of Dex began to wail, pulling Bonnie back from her memories. This was Dex. He loved women and he loved whipping them even more. She had no idea what it would take for a man like him to want only one woman, but whatever it was, she didn’t have it.

“Are you next in line?” The submissive in the birdcage whispered to her.
 

Bonnie shook her head. “Just an observer.”

“He’s really good. I can almost come just from watching him.”

She knew the feeling.
 

The woman continued. “I bet he’s amazing with his cock too. It looks really big.”

Bonnie’s stomach dropped. Oh yes, he was. And she would never forget how amazing it felt to have him inside her.
 

She tore her eyes from Dex’s backside and faced the woman. “He’s good. Really good.”

Her eyes widened as he gaze zeroed in on the collar Bonnie wore. “Oh my God, are you his? Fuck me, you are a lucky woman. I should have known he was taken. Hope you don’t hold it against me, how I spoke of him. I have a bad habit of opening my mouth when I should really keep it closed."
 

“Bonnie.” The sound of her name boomed through the room so loud, it rattled her bones. Shit. She’d been so busy gloating with the woman in the cage, she’d failed to notice he was no longer whipping the submissive shackled to the wall.

She slowly turned to face him, watching his gaze travel from her head to her toes and back again. Heat flared in his eyes first and then irritation.

“What are you doing here? I left you instructions to rest. You need time to recover.”

“I feel fine, thank you. I did get lonely though.”

The woman in the cage sucked in her breath. Maybe she wasn’t the only one who needed to learn how to hold her tongue. Disrespecting him in front of these women had not been her intention. Even if it did kill a piece of her heart to watch the way he enjoyed them.

This is Dex. He is what he is. You knew this.

Bonnie frowned. She didn’t need her damned conscience reminding her what she already knew. She had no right to be hurt, but she felt what she felt. It would be up to her to deal with it.
 

The muscle in Dex’s jaw twitched several times as she imagined him clamping down on his anger. “If you don’t want to go in the cage, you should probably go back to my room.”

The warning tone in his voice vibrated through her chest and stomach, making her whole body quiver. She almost whimpered at his Dom voice. It took several breaths to regain enough equilibrium to answer.

“That won’t be necessary, Sir.” She should have lowered her gaze but she needed to drink him in. This was likely the last time he’d look at her like that.

There was only one thing left to do.

* * *

The next day, Bonnie found herself still as restless and edgy as she’d been the night before. Her decision to leave the island early and subsequent conversations with the Eden concierge had been stressful to say the least, as she'd worked overtime the last several hours trying to convince her to stay. They were both strung tight over it.

And while she knew there was only one thing she could do to calm her racing mind, she had no desire to get on her knees. The last thing she wanted to do today was anything that reminded her, that once again, she was merely a submissive without a Dom. Alone again.

Still she stared at the mat on the floor by the window waiting for her. Maybe one last time while she looked out at the remarkable ocean. She deserved some peace after waiting all night for Dex to show up at her door to demand answers. By dawn, she’d resigned herself to the truth that she’d made the right decision to take off his collar and return to her room.

While heading to the window, Bonnie shrugged off her robe and let it fall to the floor. It seemed fitting that her time on the island would end the way it started, on her knees in front of the island waters. She thought back to the original invitation she’d found in the car outside Purgatory. The message had warned her decisions had to be made and implied they wouldn’t be easy. Talk about understatement of the year. She tried to smile, but didn’t feel it.
 

Just because she’d done what she had to didn’t mean she didn’t grieve. Bonnie stepped onto the mat and slid to her knees. Immediately her muscles began to relax and she felt her mind starting to let go.

Buzzz.

She opened her eyes and sighed. The concierge was early.
 

Buzzz.

“Coming,” she called out, hoping to settle the poor woman down. She’d been so concerned over Bonnie asking to travel today.
 

She grabbed her robe from the floor and redressed. Her clothes were laid out on the bed and it would only take a few minutes more to be ready to leave. With her mind ticking off the items on her to do list, she pulled open the door and came face to face with Dex.

“Dex,” she said, gasping on his name.

He raised his hand and showed the collar she’d left on his bed the night before dangling from his finger. “You and I need to talk.”

Her face fell. Her resolve disappeared in an instant. “Dex. Why are you here?”

“I would think that would be pretty obvious. Let me in.”

Rather than stand at the door arguing with him, she stepped back and let him enter. Of course, the first thing he noticed was her luggage packed and ready to go by the door.

“Are you leaving?”

“Yes.”
 

He turned and scanned the space, zeroing in on her mat still sitting by the window. When he looked back and focused on the robe she wore, Bonnie struggled not to squirm or look down. He knew her well enough to know what she’d been doing before he arrived and he might as well have x-ray vision for how vulnerable and naked she felt.

“Show me, Bonnie.”

Her heart seized. “What?”
 

Was he kidding?
 

“I want to see that you are healing okay. Please take off your robe so I may see for myself.”

She grabbed the edges of the garment and tightened it around her. “That is absolutely not necessary. I am fine.” Before he could argue with her, she scooted around him and across the room from him.
 

“I don’t think we should argue about this,” he said.

 
“I agree. It’s best for both of us if we just let it go.”

“Is that what you think?”

Bonnie sighed again, the weight on her shoulders and chest growing heavier. “Dex, why are you really here? You saw all of me at the club last night so you know I’m fine.”

His facial expression changed, growing darker. “You shouldn’t have been there.”

“Because you didn’t want me to see you with the other women or you didn’t want to see me?”

He started to answer her and she raised her hands. “Wait. Don’t answer that. It’s not necessary. I get it. I mean, I
really
get it. I should be used to this. This is who I am. The woman men don’t really want but settle for.”

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?” His question exploded into the room.

Shit. This really wasn’t going well. “It means it’s time we both move on.” She paced to the window and looked out at the ocean. “Don’t get me wrong, Dex. You’ve been great. You gave me everything you promised and more. But we both knew going in that our time together was temporary.”
 

Saying it out loud made her feel worse instead of better. The dull ache in her chest turned to sharp pain. She couldn’t breathe.

“That doesn’t mean I don’t want you. Want has nothing at all to do with this,” he said. “If I was a different man, I would put a real collar on you and never let you go.”

Bonnie felt her heart start to bleed. What he said sounded so real, it took all her strength not to reach out to him.

“Please, let me see you, Bonnie. I need to.”

She jerked around at the tone of his voice. He sounded more than just concerned, he sounded worried.

“What’s wrong?” she asked. “I told you I’m fine.”

“I was really rough with you. I hurt you.” The words were strong, but spoken quietly. Unnerving.

“Dex, what are you talking about? You didn’t hurt me. Everything was perfect.”

He shook his head while moving toward her. “I lost control. And nothing is more important than being in control.” He grasped her shoulders and pulled her close to him.
 

“I have to see.” He peeled the robe from her shoulders and started inspecting her body.

She wanted to say something. Hell, anything. But she couldn’t. The concern on his face melted through all of her resistance. She stood and allowed him to check every inch of her body. When his heated touch began to awaken her desire for him, she gritted her teeth and thought of the women he’d played with the night before. She’d done the best she could to put on a brave face, while trying to swallow the bitter pill that when he’d left her bed he still needed more.
 

Just like before
.
 

Chapter Twelve

“Just like before? What are you talking about?”

Bonnie wiggled out of his arms and jerked the robe back over her nude body.
 

“What did you say?” she asked, wild fear emanating from her eyes.

“You said ‘just like before.’ What did you mean?” He had that feeling again that he didn’t know a lot about her. Things he should have known in order to be the best temporary Dom he could.
 

“It doesn’t matter, Dex. I took the collar off. I’m ready to move on. I’m even making plans for my future. You’ve done your job.”

“You were never just a job for me. I didn’t just play with you once a month and not think of you again.” He grasped her wrists and pulled her to him. “I could never get you out of my head. I tried to tell myself it was just the sexual tension between us, but I know now it wasn’t. You’ve marked me, my Bonnie sub from the day we met, and for that I at least deserve your truth.”

Her eyes were glazed with tears by the time he finished talking, but to her credit they never fell. Her lips trembled. “I’m pretty sure Jim was planning to give me away after that night.”